Cover image of show Escape the Paradox

Escape the Paradox

Podcast by Helena Hickman

English

Technology & science

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About Escape the Paradox

Covering: Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma | PTSD | C-PTSD | Trauma Recovery | Emotional and Psychological AbuseWelcome to Escape the Paradox, where I expose the hidden reality of coercive control and domestic violence including psychological, emotional and physical abuse. I’m Helena, a survivor of childhood abuse. I'm a mental health nursing student and advocate, here to support you in breaking free from the confusion, fear, and isolation that abuse creates. Home should be the safest place, but for many, it becomes the most dangerous. In each episode, I share my personal story and dive into my own experiences, as well as survivor experiences, trauma-informed insights, and expert research to help you understand the mechanisms of abuse and begin your healing journey.We’ll explore tactics such as gaslighting, and how abusers wield and seek power and control, not to diagnose, but because naming abuse is the first step in reclaiming your reality. If you're ready to reconnect with your truth and rebuild your self-worth through clarity and understanding, you’re in the right place. Follow Escape the Paradox on Threads, Instagram, and TikTok: @escapetheparadox.

All episodes

17 episodes

episode Borderline Personality Disorder - Diagnosis, Women, and Trauma artwork

Borderline Personality Disorder - Diagnosis, Women, and Trauma

Send a text [https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2435877/open_sms] Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma * I think you are worth the effort of healing.  In this (long) episode, I examine the diagnostic criteria of Borderline Personality Disorder, focusing on how the diagnosis is disproportionately applied to women and deeply intertwined with histories of trauma. It explores how trauma responses are often pathologized, the gendered assumptions embedded in diagnostic practices, and the consequences of mislabeling and stigmatizing distress. References Structural Violence and the Effects of the Patriarchal Structure on the Diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder (BDP): A Critical Study Using Tools on BPD Symptoms and Social Violence https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/22/2/196 [https://www.mdpi.com/1660-4601/22/2/196]   Borderline Personality Disorder and Childhood Trauma: Exploring the Affected Biological Systems and Mechanisms. https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-017-1383-2 [https://bmcpsychiatry.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12888-017-1383-2]   Childhood Trauma and Axis I Disorders In Borderline Personality Disorder: A Correlational Study. https://mecp.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s43045-025-00511-3 [https://mecp.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s43045-025-00511-3]   DSM-5 Made Easy. Dsm-5-Tr-Made-Easy-Clinicians-Diagnosis [https://www.amazon.ca/Dsm-5-Tr-Made-Easy-Clinicians-Diagnosis/dp/1462551343/ref=sr_1_1?crid=7JNR0I6FO9JC&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.MrQd6ANBi6PlnNjztTWeFbcO8pRv5gskah6D9RJMHpnMl20pwJ_2HGd9fyqAF-nJ9e11YRv9pfPdBZ_YadgH-vJxKJnhAfGVCFZXFFIHVpD4iflPGI9Ja_4JSVW-tMKWRqVjwXdXJw44j49jQFWV4cu10y3YFIv4m7YTVPS0KP65Azr54ChKi2MMtAghmqjZLpyk4LqDkBncGZkhAqq4xmhlSX-xmSAGh_iNe4JpzGA1e33BpPUh5uXay9k7P7xRhH-W6DhOStpkvRm2S6zmQFOWQVCuW_PfopgMA35ajR0.5Q8CX01VF_qdPPB540HcHTnG87VZcADIdnaU7ByvUbk&dib_tag=se&keywords=dsm+5+made+easy&qid=1763423057&sprefix=dsm+5+made+eas%2Caps%2C229&sr=8-1] New Professional Practice Guideline for Adults with Complex Trauma Histories https://www.ctipp.org/post/new-professional-practice-guideline-for-adults-with-complex-trauma-histories [https://www.ctipp.org/post/new-professional-practice-guideline-for-adults-with-complex-trauma-histories]  Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com [https://escapetheparadox.com/] to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

22 Dec 2025 - 48 min
episode Bonus! Poem by Helena Hickman - "Restoration" artwork

Bonus! Poem by Helena Hickman - "Restoration"

Send a text [https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2435877/open_sms] Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma This bonus episode shares a poem I wrote on self-worth, confronting reality, and the work of restoring the mind from broken parts.  Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com [https://escapetheparadox.com/] to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

12 Sep 2025 - 1 min
episode Challenge Negative Thoughts about your Worth | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma artwork

Challenge Negative Thoughts about your Worth | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma

Send a text [https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2435877/open_sms] Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma * I think you are worth the effort of healing.   Worthlessness speaks in absolutes, but that doesn’t make it true. In this episode, I explore what happens when you stop taking the voice at face value and begin challenging the thoughts that try to define you.  This episode isn’t about strategies to overcome negative thoughts. It’s about acknowledging that these thoughts are unhealthy and hold back healing. Acceptance of this as a truth is the first step before any deeper work on changing them can begin.  References: The Bobo Doll Experiment [https://psychclassics.yorku.ca/Bandura/bobo.htm] Learn about DBT [https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/] Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com [https://escapetheparadox.com/] to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

12 Sep 2025 - 24 min
episode Choosing a Therapist or Counsellor | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma artwork

Choosing a Therapist or Counsellor | During and After Coercive Control, Abuse, Domestic Violence, Childhood Trauma

Send a text [https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2435877/open_sms] Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma Finding the right therapist or counsellor can feel overwhelming, especially after experiencing abuse or trauma (or maybe while you're still experiencing it). In this episode, I share practical tips for choosing a professional who truly understands coercive control and can support your healing journey.  Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com [https://escapetheparadox.com/] to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

5 Aug 2025 - 16 min
episode Smear Campaigns | What They Are, How to Spot Them, and How to Cope artwork

Smear Campaigns | What They Are, How to Spot Them, and How to Cope

Send a text [https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2435877/open_sms] Coercive Control | Domestic Violence | Childhood Trauma | Childhood Abuse | Healing after Abuse | Healing after Trauma When you leave an abusive relationship, especially one marked by coercive control, it’s not uncommon for the abuser to launch a smear campaign. This is a deliberate attempt to discredit you, isolate you, and control the narrative after you’ve left. In this episode, I break down what a smear campaign is, the red flags to watch for, and how you can protect your peace without exhausting yourself trying to prove your side.  Together, we will also explore why people often believe the abuser, and how to respond when they do. Whether you're navigating family fallout, social betrayal, or character assassination, this episode offers clarity, validation, and useful tips to help see this through. Welcome to Escape the Paradox, a podcast dedicated to exposing and exploring the truth about coercive control, emotional abuse, and the long-term trauma caused by abusive relationships. Whether it's childhood abuse from a parent, intimate partner violence, or domestic abuse in any form, this podcast dives into the patterns, dynamics, and the psychological impact. My name is Helena, and I am your host! I share my own lived experience as a survivor of childhood abuse, while also creating space for survivor stories, expert insight, and compassionate support. Healing is non-linear, and a complex and difficult process. If you're looking for support, please visit escapetheparadox.com [https://escapetheparadox.com/] to learn more about my services in abuse consulting and advocacy and 1:1 sessions. Don't forget to subscribe (follow) wherever you get your podcasts! Remember: It's not your fault, and your story matters!

22 Jun 2025 - 26 min
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