KB's Unemployed Show

Melania vs Kimmel, Drug Mule Monks & Measels

Melania vs Kimmel. The war of the words we didn't know we needed. KB pulls no punches in this week's episode, delivering the kind of honest, unfiltered commentary that late night TV is too scared to air. This week, KB breaks down: * 🎤 Kimmel vs. Melania — Why calling someone an "expected widow" isn't a joke, it's just mean. KB explains exactly where political satire ends and bitter ranting begins — from the perspective of an actual comic. * 🏛️ White House Correspondents' Dinner Shooting Reaction — The conspiracy theories, the media's bizarre refusal to state the obvious, and why Twitter is proof that society is circling the drain. * 😷 The Measles Panic — KB had them. The Brady Bunch had them. Nobody died. Calm down. * 🧘 22 Buddhist Monks Arrested With 250 LBS of Weed — Orange robes. False suitcase walls. Pure chaos. * 👟 Barefoot Boston Marathon Runner — A guy ran 26.2 miles with no shoes and no training. KB has thoughts. * 🌭 Wisconsin State Fair Sporkies 2026 — New food combinations that have absolutely no business existing, plus KB's all-time State Fair go-to order. * ⛳ KB Life Coach — A dad wants to skip his daughter's 2nd birthday to play in a golf tournament. KB delivers the verdict. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to KB's Unemployed Show 01:32 Reflections on Unemployment and Future Plans 02:36 Celebrating National Days and Personal Anecdotes 04:57 Media and Public Perception of Viruses 09:27 The White House Correspondents' Dinner Discussion 16:28 Political Rhetoric and Human Decency 19:13 Critique of Modern Comedy and Satire 28:28 Exploring State Fair Food Innovations 30:09 Crawfish and Cajun Cuisine 33:47 Innovative Food Trends 39:57 State Fair Favorites 44:20 Childhood Memories and Food Choices 52:42 KB Life Coach: Parenting Decisions KB's Unemployed Show is the no-filter, comedy-first news commentary show for people who are tired of being told what to think. Funny, opinionated, and always real.

Dildo Cornhole and my 4th Flooded Basement

This week's episode is a masterclass in human stupidity, and we are HERE for it. We dig deep into the dildo-throwing protest movement — not just the headlines, but the origins, the strategy (if you can call it that), and what it says about a society that has completely lost the plot. Spoiler: it says a lot. Then we pivot to a guy who thought the best way to beat Spirit Airlines was to duct-tape raw meat to his torso. Was he wrong? Was he a genius? We'll let you decide. (He was wrong.) But first — KB survived a 300-year flood. Again. For the fourth time. With a broken garage door spring, a locked-in car, and a Home Depot rental line that tested his morality. Did he give up the last carpet fan to his neighbor? Absolutely not. Was he an ass? He doesn't think so. You might disagree. This is the news commentary show that doesn't apologize for laughing at the dumb things people do — because someone has to. Real stories, zero filter, maximum sarcasm, and the kind of takes your favorite radio host would drop if they had nothing left to lose. New episode every week. Hit Follow and never miss a moment of the unemployed chaos

PGA Pro Mark Wilson + The Mom Who Put an End to New Math

PGA Tour winner Mark Wilson goes inside Augusta National to reveal what the Masters course is REALLY like — and KB drops one of his funniest Life Coach segments yet on a disastrous $220 date gone wrong. On Day 120 of KB's unemployment journey, this Masters Week special delivers an exclusive sit-down with five-time PGA Tour champion and SiriusXM golf analyst Mark Wilson, who breaks down Augusta National's notorious greens, the elevation surprises, Magnolia Lane emotions, and whether Scottie Scheffler is truly the Tiger Woods of this era. KB kicks things off with a hilarious tribute to the lost glory of metal spikes on asphalt — a nostalgia trip every golfer over 40 will feel in their soul. Then it's National Zoo Day, which somehow leads to an absolutely brilliant bit about why you can never lose an Amish kid at the Milwaukee County Zoo. Trust us, it tracks. Then KB goes full Life Coach mode on a TikToker named Squash whose date ordered $220 surf and turf with caviar, ate exactly three bites, pushed the plate away, and then lost her mind when he asked for a box. KB's verdict? Cheap at twice the price. Back to golf — Mark Wilson debates LIV vs. PGA Tour, the rise of the TGL indoor golf league, the greatest shots in Masters history (Bubba Watson's hook gets the nod), and who he's picking to slip on the green jacket this year: Xander Schauffele. KB closes with a bombshell: he just landed his dream retirement job as a starter at Erin Hills — home of five USGA championships. Not bad for an unemployed guy. Subscribe, leave a review, and make good choices. 0:00 – 🎙️ Welcome to Day 120 of Unemployment 2:30 – ⛳ Watching the 1986 Masters & The Glory of Metal Spikes 7:30 – 🦒 National Zoo Day: The Amish Kid You Can Never Lose 13:30 – 📰 NEWS: Aubrey Plaza Is Pregnant (15 Months After Tragedy) 15:00 – 🏀 Shaq's "Dunk Man" League — Will It Save the Dunk Contest? 16:30 – ⏰ The 33-Hour Work Week Study (Fridays Are Useless) 19:00 – 🚪 Sundays Should Be Sacred — Bring Back "Going Visiting" 21:00 – 🍺 Gen Z Is Invading Dive Bars & I'm Furious 23:00 – 💔 KB LIFE COACH: The $220 Surf & Turf Date Disaster 25:07 – 🎤 INTERVIEW: Mark Wilson — 5-Time PGA Tour Winner 26:10 – 👨‍👦 Coaching Your Kids in Golf: Do They Actually Listen? 28:10 – 😤 Is Golf the Most Disappointing Sport on the Planet? 30:05 – 🧀 Winning the Phoenix Open While Wearing a Cheese Head 34:09 – 🌳 Driving Down Magnolia Lane: First Masters Experience 37:01 – 🧠 Augusta Strategy: Is It a Feel Course or a Math Course? 39:46 – 😲 The One Thing About Augusta That Shocks Every Pro 40:51 – 🏔️ Augusta's Insane Elevation Changes (Nobody Talks About This) 41:48 – 📋 How Mark Wilson Played Augusta Hole by Hole 44:05 – ⚔️ LIV Golf: Was It Good or Terrible for the PGA Tour? 46:22 – 👑 Is Scottie Scheffler the Tiger Woods of This Era? 49:16 – 📺 TGL Indoor Golf League: Why Is Simulator Golf So Hot Right Now? 51:10 – 😂 On-Tour Personalities & the Art of the Trash Talk 53:04 – 🔄 The Painful Gap Between PGA Tour and Senior Tour 55:50 – 💥 Young Bombers Who Made Pros Say "What Just Happened?" 57:46 – 🏆 Greatest Shot in Masters History: Nicklaus, Tiger, or Bubba? 59:08 – 🤝 The Night KB's Wife Walked Up to Bubba Watson 1:01:27 – 🌟 KB Lands His DREAM JOB as Starter at Erin Hills 1:02:47 – 🔮 Masters 2026 Prediction: Mark Wilson Picks Xander Schauffele 1:04:43 – 👋 Outro: "Make Good Choices"

Did the Unabomber Predict the Future? His Manifesto vs. Modern Society

Did a domestic terrorist accidentally predict the future? On this April Fool's Day edition of KB's Unemployed Show, KB digs into the surprising — and unsettling — accuracy of Ted Kaczynski's 1995 manifesto, Industrial Society and Its Future. Spoiler: this is not a joke. After watching Netflix's Mindhunter, KB was inspired to actually read the Unabomber's manifesto — and found himself floored by how much of it maps onto today's society. Political correctness, over-socialization, social division, government dependency, and the erosion of the family unit — Kaczynski wrote about all of it decades before it became daily headlines. KB reads key excerpts and lets you decide what to make of it. KB makes it crystal clear: he does not condone, advocate, or sympathize with anything Ted Kaczynski did. This is a discussion of ideas — not the man. Also on today's show: the Artemis II moon mission launches (and why aren't more people talking about it?), Tiger Woods steps back citing health and family, Pizza Hut Canada drops a hot dog stuffed crust that puts America to shame, and KB investigates "Meaties" — a ground beef breakfast cereal that might be the greatest April Fool's hoax ever pulled off. ⏱ Chapters & Timestamps * 00:00 – Welcome to the April Fool's Edition * 01:22 – Show Overview: Artemis Moon Launch & the Unabomber Manifesto * 02:45 – History of April Fool's Day: Ancient Rome to France to Scotland * 06:00 – Legendary April Fool's Hoaxes: Erupting Volcanoes, BBC Spaghetti & Pi Recalculation * 10:48 – Meaties: Ground Beef Breakfast Cereal — Genius Hoax or Real Product? * 15:44 – Artemis II Moon Mission Launch: First Human Spaceflight Beyond Earth's Orbit Since 1972 * 19:30 – Tiger Woods Steps Away: DWI, Pain Meds & Seeking Treatment * 22:43 – Pizza Hut Canada's Hot Dog Stuffed Crust: Why Didn't America Think of This? * 25:50 – Intro to the Unabomber Manifesto: Why KB Read It & How He Used It in Class * 29:10 – Reading the Manifesto: Kaczynski on Technology, Societal Disruption & Political Correctness * 33:34 – Feelings of Inferiority & Over-Socialization: What Kaczynski Got Right * 42:45 – Protests, Power, and the Drive for Hostility * 44:35 – Over-Socialization: Shame, Guilt & the University Culture * 52:00 – Government vs. Family Loyalty: KB's Two-Word Swap That Changes Everything * 55:00 – Scientists, the Hydrogen Bomb & Edward Teller: Are Experts Really Motivated by Humanity? * 57:10 – Final Thoughts: Separate the Message from the Messenger * 01:01:00 – Kenneth's Quote of the Day & Closing Thoughts

Bad Soups. Bad Drinkers. Bad Decisions.

Piper the News Girl is back, which means this episode had almost no chance of staying normal. KB and Piper tear through spring break stupidity, cocktail snobbery, cheesesteak opinions, college-life weirdness, and a pile of offbeat stories with the kind of chemistry that turns one topic into ten and all of them into trouble. This episode has everything: bad decisions, drink rules, generational disagreements, random life observations, and strong opinions delivered with absolutely the right amount of sarcasm. If you enjoy funny conversation, sharp banter, and the sense that the show could derail at any moment in the best possible way, press play. Follow KB’s Unemployed Show, leave a rating and review, and send this episode to the one friend whose drink order tells you everything you need to know about them. CHAPTER MARKERS 00:00 Piper the News Girl is back 02:05 Spring break fails and public stupidity 08:15 Cheesesteak opinions nobody asked for 15:50 National Cocktail Day gets judgmental 27:20 KB’s drink rules for grownups 41:05 The evolution of the modern drinker 56:30 College life, naps, and generational chaos 1:08:00 Weird news takes a hard left turn 1:18:20 Final thoughts, last laughs, and a clean exit