CAYA Conversations

Riding the Wave: Real Talk on Grief

Grief doesn’t follow a script—it moves like a tide, showing up in waves after a funeral, a breakup, a move, or one of those “little deaths” that catch you off guard. We sit down with Jason Scimemi to unpack what the five stages actually look like in real life and why they aren’t steps to climb but places you revisit as triggers surface. From secondary losses—the empty side of the bed, the missing routine, the lost safety net—to the way anger can feel powerful yet stall healing, we get honest about how people truly move forward. We dig into coping without numbing, including why avoidance seems protective but keeps pain stuck. You’ll hear simple, practical tools for the days when feelings hit out of nowhere: grounding through the senses, naming emotions, calling someone even when you don’t want to, and letting presence do the heavy lifting. We challenge the hierarchy of pain that shames people for grieving a pet, a short relationship, or a job, and we draw a clear line between acceptance and approval—acceptance means facing reality, not feeling happy about it. If you’re supporting someone, we offer language that lands with care instead of platitudes, plus ways to be there without trying to fix what can’t be fixed. And if you’re wondering when to seek help, we map out the signs of feeling stuck and point to resources—from online and local groups to individual counseling—so you can find the right fit. Grief reshapes attention; it asks us to notice what remains and to practice connection when it feels hardest. Subscribe, share this episode with someone who needs it, and leave a review telling us one small practice that helps you ride the wave. Whether you have a question, want to share your thoughts, or just want to dive deeper into an episode's topic, you can now text us directly. Your feedback helps shape future episodes, and we can't wait to hear from you! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2414132/fan_mail/new]  Explore the various services available in our community to support parents and students facing social and emotional challenges at  https://chs.clarkston.k12.mi.us/counseling/emotional-support For Talk It Out episode questions contact David from Giesken Counseling Services - Clarkston at 810-626-5191. For Parenting Under Stress episode questions contact Trish from Ellie Mental Health - Clarkston at tbrown@elliementalhealth.com or 248-308-5535. For more information on Clarkston Area Youth Assistance visit https://caya-mi.org/ or call 248-623-4313.

When Anger Is A Signal, Not The Story

Ever feel your temper flip from zero to sixty before you can catch it? We break down what’s really happening in your brain during anger, using an office analogy that makes the science simple: the “security guard” amygdala races to protect you while the “CEO” prefrontal cortex gets sidelined. That’s why small slights can feel like big threats—and why your body heats up, your jaw locks, and your heart pounds. Understanding this wiring is the first step to getting back in control. From there, we get practical. We map the early body cues that signal an oncoming spike and share quick resets you can use anywhere: distraction that actually works, the temperature trick of cold water to cool your system, exhale-focused breathing to restore calm, and a safer outlet for pent-up energy by pushing a wall instead of punching one. Then we pivot into communication: how to use I statements to reduce defensiveness, how to call a respectful timeout with a clear return, and how to draft hard messages and wait 24 hours so you speak with care instead of heat. We also explore what anger often hides. Many blowups are shields for hurt, anxiety, stress, or even depression that shows up as chronic irritability. When you learn to name what sits underneath, anger becomes a signal rather than the whole story. And if you slip, we outline a real apology that repairs trust: name your action, acknowledge the impact, and offer a concrete fix for next time. Along the way, David Turner brings counseling-room wisdom, and we share scripts and examples you can use with parents, friends, teachers, or partners today. If this conversation helps you spot your signals, speak with clarity, or repair a rupture, share it with someone who might need it too. Subscribe for more practical mental health tools, leave a quick review to help others find the show, and tell us: which strategy are you trying first? Whether you have a question, want to share your thoughts, or just want to dive deeper into an episode's topic, you can now text us directly. Your feedback helps shape future episodes, and we can't wait to hear from you! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2414132/fan_mail/new]  Explore the various services available in our community to support parents and students facing social and emotional challenges at  https://chs.clarkston.k12.mi.us/counseling/emotional-support For Talk It Out episode questions contact David from Giesken Counseling Services - Clarkston at 810-626-5191. For Parenting Under Stress episode questions contact Trish from Ellie Mental Health - Clarkston at tbrown@elliementalhealth.com or 248-308-5535. For more information on Clarkston Area Youth Assistance visit https://caya-mi.org/ or call 248-623-4313.

Substances, Choices, & Limits

Teen life comes with pressure: friends, stress, curiosity, and a constant pull to try what everyone else is trying. We dig into the real reasons teens reach for substances and separate short-term “feel chill” effects from the long-term costs to sleep, mood, memory, and reaction time. Along the way, we share simple, proven skills that make it easier to handle pressure, set boundaries, and still keep the night fun. You’ll hear how alcohol and weed actually impact the developing brain, why your sleep suffers even if you crash faster, and what that means for school, driving, and sports. We talk through the moment a casual habit becomes a coping strategy, the quick questions that reveal your true “why,” and the exact scripts that let you say no without killing the vibe. From box breathing and music resets to walking and trusted conversations, these tools are small, repeatable, and effective when you need them most. Worried about your use or a friend’s? We map out confidential support options, from peer groups to therapists and local youth services, and explain how privacy works so you can speak freely. We also connect the dots between substances, sports performance, injury recovery, mental health, and relationships—because choices don’t happen in a vacuum. If you want control, clarity, and real strategies that protect your goals, this conversation has your back. If this resonated, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a review to help more families find practical, judgment‑free guidance. Whether you have a question, want to share your thoughts, or just want to dive deeper into an episode's topic, you can now text us directly. Your feedback helps shape future episodes, and we can't wait to hear from you! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2414132/fan_mail/new]  Explore the various services available in our community to support parents and students facing social and emotional challenges at  https://chs.clarkston.k12.mi.us/counseling/emotional-support For Talk It Out episode questions contact David from Giesken Counseling Services - Clarkston at 810-626-5191. For Parenting Under Stress episode questions contact Trish from Ellie Mental Health - Clarkston at tbrown@elliementalhealth.com or 248-308-5535. For more information on Clarkston Area Youth Assistance visit https://caya-mi.org/ or call 248-623-4313.

Stress, Tamed

Ever wonder where normal stress ends and overwhelm begins? We dig into the telltale signs and share practical tools you can use anywhere—before class, after practice, or during a late-night study crunch—to calm your body, clear your head, and get back to what matters. With Lizzie joining Max, we map the difference between temporary pressure and persistent stress that strains relationships or shows up as headaches, stomach aches, or panic. You’ll learn the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding method (with the essential twist of using vivid, specific detail), box breathing you can trace with your finger to recruit more senses, and body scans to release hidden tension. We talk about sleep regularity versus just chasing hours, how screens hijack attention with constant micro-alarms, and why quick checks—did I eat, did I sleep, am I comfortable—can stop a spiral before it starts. For those “everything is urgent” days, we break down task trees, timeboxing, and alternating hard and easy work to keep momentum. You’ll also hear how the two-minute rule clears mental clutter fast and how color coding can cut through decision fatigue without adding stress. For acute spikes, we explore sensory pattern interrupts, like a burst of cold water or a very sour candy, to snap attention back to the present. We draw a clear line between healthy distractions and avoidance, and we outline when to ask for help—from a counselor, teacher, coach, caregiver, or health professional—especially if symptoms linger or escalate. If talking feels heavy, we offer a free writing practice to unload your thoughts without editing, then revisit them with a calmer mind to reframe and plan your next move. If stress has been running the show, this conversation offers simple, repeatable steps to reclaim focus and confidence. Listen, try one tool today, and let us know what changed. If this helped, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a quick review—your feedback helps others find these resources too. Whether you have a question, want to share your thoughts, or just want to dive deeper into an episode's topic, you can now text us directly. Your feedback helps shape future episodes, and we can't wait to hear from you! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2414132/fan_mail/new]  Explore the various services available in our community to support parents and students facing social and emotional challenges at  https://chs.clarkston.k12.mi.us/counseling/emotional-support For Talk It Out episode questions contact David from Giesken Counseling Services - Clarkston at 810-626-5191. For Parenting Under Stress episode questions contact Trish from Ellie Mental Health - Clarkston at tbrown@elliementalhealth.com or 248-308-5535. For more information on Clarkston Area Youth Assistance visit https://caya-mi.org/ or call 248-623-4313.

Protect Your Peace - Healthy Relationships

Boundaries aren’t punishments; they’re instructions on how to treat us. We sat down to map the difference between supportive relationships and the kinds of dynamics that drain your energy, cloud your judgment, and put your safety at risk. From the first signs of respect to the subtle creep of control, we share practical ways to protect your peace without losing your voice. We start with a clear picture of healthy connection: feeling safe to be yourself, being heard when something hurts, and receiving encouragement that pushes you toward your own goals rather than someone else’s agenda. Then we dig into boundary language that works—calm “I” statements, collaborative problem-solving, and firm safety lines when cooperation isn’t an option. You’ll hear simple scripts you can use today and learn why consequences are essential to make any boundary real. We also break down red flags you should never ignore: escalating aggression, negative peer pressure around drugs or sex, controlling rules about your choices, and love bombing that masquerades as devotion but turns into surveillance. That intensity can show up in friendships too, with overnight “besties” who expect constant access. Finally, we explore why it’s so hard to let go of toxic ties—history, hope, and social media’s glamorization of chaos—and offer a steady plan to step back, reassess, and only re-engage if consistent change shows up over time. If this conversation helped you name a boundary or spot a red flag, share it with a friend who needs it, subscribe for more grounded relationship tools, and leave a quick review to help others find the show. Your peace is worth protecting—what boundary will you enforce this week? Whether you have a question, want to share your thoughts, or just want to dive deeper into an episode's topic, you can now text us directly. Your feedback helps shape future episodes, and we can't wait to hear from you! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2414132/fan_mail/new]  Explore the various services available in our community to support parents and students facing social and emotional challenges at  https://chs.clarkston.k12.mi.us/counseling/emotional-support For Talk It Out episode questions contact David from Giesken Counseling Services - Clarkston at 810-626-5191. For Parenting Under Stress episode questions contact Trish from Ellie Mental Health - Clarkston at tbrown@elliementalhealth.com or 248-308-5535. For more information on Clarkston Area Youth Assistance visit https://caya-mi.org/ or call 248-623-4313.