Her Life, Her Rules

Healing After an Affair: Mandy Maree on Betrayal, Rebuilding, and Choosing Yourself

Romance author and mother Mandy Maree joins Ania Ray to talk about betrayal,  affair recovery, codependency healing, and the courage it takes to stop pretending everything is fine. What happens when the life you built—the marriage, the home, the identity you thought was safe—shatters overnight? What do you do when the role you’ve spent years perfecting no longer protects you? In this raw and deeply validating conversation, Mandy shares how she discovered an affair during her husband’s deployment, how years of people-pleasing kept her trapped, and how she rebuilt her identity after divorce and heartbreak. Guided for years by the rule “Do whatever it takes to make everyone else happy,” Mandy reveals how she finally broke that pattern—and the new rule she lives by now: “You can’t rebuild until you stop pretending everything’s fine.” With honesty, humor, and more strength than she gives herself credit for, Mandy reflects on the moment she stopped minimizing her pain, the shock of infidelity, and the quiet bravery required to choose herself—even when everything felt like it was falling apart. Mandy opens up about: * How people-pleasing and perfectionism shaped her marriage, motherhood, and identity * The slow unraveling: deployment, basement floods, and emotional survival * How she discovered the affair—and why it cut so deeply * What divorce recovery actually looks like as a military spouse and mother * Grieving the woman she used to be and rebuilding the woman she’s becoming * Letting go of control, healing codependent patterns, and learning to trust herself again If you’ve ever sacrificed yourself to keep the peace, questioned your worth after betrayal, or felt lost in the space between who you were and who you’re becoming—Mandy’s story will make you feel seen, supported, and less alone. If Mandy’s story brought something up for you, you’re not alone. Here are gentle starting places for support: • AffairRecovery.com Therapist-led courses and resources for healing after emotional or physical infidelity, rebuilding trust, and understanding the trauma of betrayal. • Codependency Recovery Resources If you’re unlearning people-pleasing or boundary collapse, these are grounding guides: – Codependent No More by Melody Beattie – The Codependence Recovery Podcast – The Self-Love Workbook by Shainna Ali – Local and online support circles (search “codependency support groups” + your area) Take what you need, leave the rest, and remember: seeking support is a profound act of self-respect. 📖 Love today’s conversation? You’ll love Creating the Rules—a story of coming home, second chances, and what happens when speaking your truth is the only way to save what you love most. ✨ Grab your signed paperback (personalized by me! Tap here! [https://quillandcup.myshopify.com/cart/50537777463611:1?channel=buy_button]) and/or start the ebook instantly while you wait → [click here! [https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Rules-Cromwell-Book-ebook/dp/B0FRN1QN1K/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0]] This is the third novel in The Cromwell Rules trilogy—but you can read it as a standalone or start from the beginning to follow Anne Cromwell’s full arc.

I Want Better for My Life — Chronic Illness, Identity Loss, and Creative Resurgence with Author Nicole Annbury

Author Nicole Annbury joins host Ania Ray for a raw, deeply honest conversation about chronic illness, identity loss, grief, and what it takes to reclaim a creative life when the path you planned for yourself disappears overnight. What happens when your body changes faster than your dreams can keep up?  And how do you rebuild a writing life after years of simply existing? In this intimate episode, author and social worker–turned–thriller writer Nicole Annbury shares her decade-long journey through fibromyalgia, rheumatoid arthritis, and OCD—and how chronic illness forced her to confront the rules she thought she had to live by. Once holding the belief that “success means having a full-time job” and that she needed to “contribute to society” in a very specific, traditional way, Nicole opens up about the painful grief of losing the life she was building—and the surprising, beautiful life that emerged when she finally let herself rest. Nicole shares: * How a former social worker who stopped writing for 10 years became the Amazon chart-topping author of The Final Sentence * Why chronic illness grief hits differently—and why it’s not just the body you’re grieving, but the identity you thought you’d have * How she learned to cope when chronic illness didn’t “give her a calendar” * The impossible mental load of trying to work while sick—and the moment her doctor told her the stress was doing more harm than good * The self-blame, shame, and “If I can do this, why can’t I work?” spiral that mirrors writerly imposter syndrome * Why her new rule—“Say yes more often”—has changed her entire creative life * Her Hedgie House favorite: the non-negotiable truth that rest isn’t optional for the body, the brain, or the characters you’re trying to write If you’re a writer living with chronic illness, navigating burnout, or grieving the version of yourself you thought you’d be by now, this episode is a balm. Nicole’s story is proof that creativity is still possible—and sometimes even more powerful—on the other side of loss. 📚 If this episode moved you: You’ll love The Final Sentence by Nicole Annbury. Highly recommended not only for thriller lovers, but for anyone navigating grief through fiction. 👉 Buy it here [https://www.nicoleannbury.com/product-page/signed-copy-of-the-final-sentence]. 🎧 If you’re a fellow Spoonie, a writer with chronic illness, or someone rebuilding your identity after detours you never asked for—you’re in the right place. ✨ Resource for Spoonies: Learn about the original “Spoon Theory,” created by Christine Miserandino, which has helped millions explain chronic illness and energy budgeting: 👉 https://butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/ [https://health.clevelandclinic.org/spoon-theory-chronic-illness] 📲 Connect with Nicole She’s currently building her true-crime-loving community! Find her at @nicoleannbury [https://www.instagram.com/nicoleannbury] and tell her what part of her story resonated with you. 📖 Love today’s conversation? You’ll love Creating the Rules—a story of coming home, second chances, and what happens when speaking your truth is the only way to save what you love most. ✨ Grab your signed paperback (personalized by me! Tap here! [https://quillandcup.myshopify.com/cart/50537777463611:1?channel=buy_button]) and/or start the ebook instantly while you wait → [click here! [https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Rules-Cromwell-Book-ebook/dp/B0FRN1QN1K/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0]] This is the third novel in The Cromwell Rules trilogy—but you can read it as a standalone or start from the beginning to follow Anne Cromwell’s full arc.

I Create for Me — Grief, Motherhood, and Creative Recovery with Author Gina R. Briggs

Author and artist Gina R. Briggs joins Ania Ray to talk about creativity after loss, motherhood through adoption, and the courage to create for yourself again. What happens when the applause fades—and you realize you’ve been performing for everyone but yourself? In this heartfelt conversation, author and host Ania Ray sits down with Gina R. Briggs—author, artist, and mother—to talk about creativity, grief, and the courage to reclaim your voice after loss. Once guided by the rule “External validation defines artistry,” Gina shares how she rebuilt her identity after miscarriage, how motherhood through adoption reshaped her art, and the new rule that drives her today: “Let my daughter see me becoming.” Gina opens up about: * How typecasting and perfectionism shaped (and limited) her artistry * What grief taught her about intuition and creative survival * The sacred space she calls “the pit” and how to climb out of it * Her joy list, the small rungs that led her back to creation * The story behind her novel Porch Light On—and the light she keeps burning for her daughter’s birth mother If you’ve ever tied your worth to achievement, felt stuck in the space between who you were and who you’re becoming, or needed a reminder that creation itself can be healing—you’ll find solace in Gina’s story. 📖 If this episode moved you: you’ll love Porch Light On by Gina R. Briggs—a haunting, hopeful novel about loss, motherhood, and the light we leave on for love. You can buy it here: https://payhip.com/b/pu1WK [https://payhip.com/b/pu1WK] 🎧 Listen now, follow, and share this episode to your IG stories. Tag @theaniassey so Ania can thank you personally. 📖 Love today’s conversation? You’ll love Creating the Rules—a story of coming home, second chances, and what happens when speaking your truth is the only way to save what you love most. ✨ Grab your signed paperback (personalized by me! Tap here! [https://quillandcup.myshopify.com/cart/50537777463611:1?channel=buy_button]) and/or start the ebook instantly while you wait → [click here! [https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Rules-Cromwell-Book-ebook/dp/B0FRN1QN1K/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0]] This is the third novel in The Cromwell Rules trilogy—but you can read it as a standalone or start from the beginning to follow Anne Cromwell’s full arc.

Live First. Let Go Next. — Grief, Control & the Courage to Trust with Life & Energy Coach Megan Johnston

Live First. Let Go Next. It sounds simple—but what happens when life interrupts your mountaintop moment? In this powerful conversation, author and host Ania Ray sits down with Megan Johnston [https://meganjohnstoncoaching.com/], a Certified Life & Energy Coach known as the Clarity Queen, to talk about what it really means to surrender control and keep choosing life first—even through grief. Megan opens up about: * The one brave “yes” that launched her around-the-world trip with her husband * The text from home that changed everything—and what grief taught her about trust * Why surrender isn’t passive (and what it looks like in everyday life, from parenting to friendship) * The nervous-system cost of constant travel and the myth of the glamorous digital nomad life * The rule she’s still working on: being the kind of friend she wants to be If you’ve ever gripped too tightly to your goals, felt guilty about friendship, or wondered how to live your values when everything shifts beneath you, Megan’s story will resonate. Come for the wisdom, stay for the laughter, and leave with language you can use right away—like her grounding reframe: “What am I making this mean?” 📖 If this episode nudged you to live first and loosen control, you’ll love Ania’s new novel Creating the Rules [https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/241704415-creating-the-rules]—about a woman who must decide what still fits when truth shows up uninvited. Grab a signed paperback (personalized!) via the link in the show notes. 👉 If this episode helped you: follow, rate & review Her Life, Her Rules, and share it to your IG Stories. Tag @theaniassey so Ania can thank you personally. 📖 Love today’s conversation? You’ll love Creating the Rules—a story of coming home, second chances, and what happens when speaking your truth is the only way to save what you love most. ✨ Grab your signed paperback (personalized by me! Tap here! [https://quillandcup.myshopify.com/cart/50537777463611:1?channel=buy_button]) and/or start the ebook instantly while you wait → [click here! [https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Rules-Cromwell-Book-ebook/dp/B0FRN1QN1K/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0]] This is the third novel in The Cromwell Rules trilogy—but you can read it as a standalone or start from the beginning to follow Anne Cromwell’s full arc.

Protect Your Peace with Sarah Peachey

Military spouse, writer, and mom of three on finding peace, letting go of perfection, and learning to ask for help. What happens when you live by the rule “ I have to know how to do it all, and I have to do it all on my own"—and try to carry it all for years? In this episode of Her Life, Her Rules, I sit down with writer, editor, and military spouse Sarah Peachey to talk about the weight of doing everything yourself, the burnout that forced her to reevaluate, and the new rule she’s embracing for a more sustainable, peaceful life, even as world event continue to be unpredictable and anxiety-inducing. Sarah shares what 16 years of military family life has taught her about resilience, community, and letting go of perfection. From long deployments to raising three kids overseas, her journey is both raw and relatable—reminding us that asking for help is what community exists for. In this episode you’ll hear: * The rule Sarah clung to for years: “I have to do it all on my own” and the moment she realized she needed to break it. * The physical and emotional crash that changed everything and how her new rule is keeping her healthy and grounded. * How community stepped in when she couldn’t do it all. * Her new non-negotiable rule: "Protect your peace." We also talk about her debut novel Whispers of War—and get a sneak peek at the sequel, The Howl of War. Sarah’s story is a reminder that peace is precious, perfection is overrated, and we’re not meant to do it all alone. 📖 Love today’s conversation? You’ll love Creating the Rules—a story of coming home, second chances, and what happens when speaking your truth is the only way to save what you love most. ✨ Grab your signed paperback (personalized by me! Tap here! [https://quillandcup.myshopify.com/cart/50537777463611:1?channel=buy_button]) and/or start the ebook instantly while you wait → [click here! [https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Rules-Cromwell-Book-ebook/dp/B0FRN1QN1K/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0]] This is the third novel in The Cromwell Rules trilogy—but you can read it as a standalone or start from the beginning to follow Anne Cromwell’s full arc.