Who Do I Want to Be in This Moment? | Choosing Character Over Winning

What Makes Me Feel Warm Inside? | The Body Reading Behind a Familiar Word

Every language on earth uses the same word for the temperature of a fire and the quality of a friend. Warm. This is not a coincidence, and it is not a metaphor. It is a body fact. This week's One Question takes a quiet, tender look at the word warm — and the surprisingly precise neuroscience underneath it. Drawing on Williams and Bargh's landmark 2008 Yale study on embodied cognition (the one where holding a warm cup made participants rate a stranger as more generous), Stephen Porges' polyvagal work on co-regulation — including inter-species co-regulation, which is why a cat on your chest is doing something genuinely biological — and Mary Oliver's line about the soft animal of the body. With a small story about Lucy, my staple in the middle of the night. What makes you feel warm inside?

What Am I Tolerating? | The Question That Made Modern Coaching

This week's One Question is one of the oldest, sharpest tools in the modern coaching tradition — a question made central in the early 1990s by Thomas Leonard, who is often credited as the founder of professional coaching as a discipline. His instruction to his clients was deceptively simple: list — not five, not ten, but fifty to a hundred — of the small, medium, and large things you are tolerating in your daily life. The list is meant to feel ridiculous. That is part of the point. Drawing on Leonard's framework, Bruce McEwen's neuroscience of allostatic load (the cumulative wear-and-tear of low-grade chronic stress), the sociology of how we are trained — especially as women — to widen our window of tolerance, and a small story involving a broken cabinet hinge that I tolerated for nearly two years. What am I tolerating?

What Guilty Pleasure Do I Not Actually Feel Guilty About? | The Quiet Tax on Joy

A lighter, slightly subversive question this week. The phrase guilty pleasure is doing more work than we usually notice — it's a small linguistic apology we lodge into our sentence before mentioning anything we love that we're not "supposed" to love. This week's episode is an invitation to perform an honest audit. Of the pleasures you have been calling guilty, how many are you actually guilty about? Or have you just been paying the cultural tax out of habit? Drawing on Pierre Bourdieu's sociology of taste, Paul Bloom on the neurology of pleasure, and a personal confession involving cult documentaries, a knitting project, and a great deal of unrepentant judgment of strangers on screen.

Are You Okay? | Asking the Question We Usually Skip — for Mental Health Awareness Wee

This week marks the final day of Mental Health Awareness Week 2026 in the UK, organised by the Mental Health Foundation. The theme this year is Action — a recognition that awareness, on its own, is no longer enough. So this week's episode offers the smallest, bravest action I can think of: a single, sincere question, asked of yourself and of the people you love. The kind of question my friend Jen once asked me, on a couch in my own house, years ago — and changed my life. Drawing on Matthew Lieberman and Naomi Eisenberger's research on social pain, Stephen Porges' polyvagal work on co-regulation, and current UK statistics from the Mental Health Foundation, this episode explores why being asked sincerely matters so much — and what it takes to receive the answer when someone says no, I'm not okay. Support: 🇬🇧 UK: Samaritans, free, 24/7 — 116 123. SHOUT text service: text SHOUT to 85258. Emergency: 999 or NHS 111, option 2. 🇺🇸 US: 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline — call or text 988 (free, 24/7). 🌍 Anywhere else in the world: A quick online search will find the crisis line for your country.

What Page Do I Need to Turn? | The Stories We've Read Too Many Times

We talk about our lives in the language of books — chapters, pages, narratives, storylines. It is one of the oldest, truest metaphors we have, because we are quite literally narrating ourselves all day long. This week's One Question explores what happens when we read the same page about ourselves so many times that we stop noticing it is a page. Drawing on the neuroscience of the default mode network, Hebbian learning ("neurons that fire together, wire together"), Erving Goffman's sociology of the co-authored self, the science of memory reconsolidation, and Joan Didion's foundational line on storytelling, this episode is an invitation to lift the corner of the page you have been re-reading — and decide whether it is still the story you want to be inside. What page do you need to turn?