what actually causes an eating disorder? | recovered-ish with chloe cox

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One of the most common questions I get — from clients, from my own lived experience, from people who have spent years wondering — is this: why me? Why did I get an eating disorder when the people around me didn't? In this episode I'm getting into the real answer. Not the oversimplified version. The actual, nuanced, deeply personal answer — using my own story, my clinical experience, and the framework I use with clients in my group program The Quasi-Recovery Exit to help people understand themselves in a way that actually moves the needle in recovery. This one is a thinker. I hope it gives you some real clarity. This Episode Is Brought to You By Cozy Earth Cozy Earth makes the softest, most comfortable pajamas and bedding I’ve foung — and comfort in my body is something I don't compromise on anymore. Visit CozyEarth.com [http://cozyearth.com/] and use code RECOVERY for up to 20% off. In This Episode: * Why I grew up with two sisters, in the same family, doing the same activities — and I'm the only one who got an eating disorder * The genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger framework — and what it actually means for understanding your own story * The specific temperament traits I was born with that made me vulnerable to an eating disorder * How my performing arts high school became the environmental trigger that intensified those traits * Why understanding what caused your eating disorder is actually one of the most powerful things you can do in recovery * The identity conversation — how the traits your eating disorder co-opted are actually your greatest strengths * Why you won't lose yourself when you recover — you'll finally find yourself * How narrative therapy helps you make meaning of your story without shame * What to do with the traits you don't want to give up in recovery * A reframe for the question "what's wrong with me?" — and what to ask instead Timestamps: 0:00 Intro + new desk setup 2:00 Life update — pregnancy announcement followup, son's hospital stay, Disneyland plans 4:00 A note on binge urges and what they're actually telling you 6:00 Today's topic: what actually causes an eating disorder? 7:00 Growing up with two sisters — same family, same upbringing, only I got an eating disorder 10:00 Genetics loads the gun, environment pulls the trigger 12:00 The temperament traits I was born with — drive, perfectionism, sensory sensitivity 16:00 Early signs of genetic predisposition — body awareness from a very young age 18:00 How performing arts high school became the environmental trigger 22:00 Competition, comparison, and the perfect storm that created my eating disorder 24:00 How to understand your own story through this lens 26:00 The identity conversation — temperament vs conditioning 28:00 Your eating disorder traits are actually your superpowers 30:00 Narrative therapy and making meaning of your story 32:00 What to ask yourself instead of "what's wrong with me?" 35:00 How to channel your traits toward recovery and growth 37:00 Closing thoughts Practical Reflection Questions From This Episode: * What traits do I have that might have made me vulnerable to an eating disorder? * What life circumstances intensified those traits or made the eating disorder necessary? * What do I actually like about those traits — and do I want to keep them in recovery? * Where do those traits show up in my life in ways that aren't harmful? * Can I look back through my story with curiosity instead of criticism? Quotes from This Episode: "You don't have to become a different person to recover from your eating disorder. You just have to become who you've always been without the eating disorder casting a shadow over it." "Every trait that made you good at your eating disorder can make you amaz Resources + Connect with Me: * Instagram: @recoverwithchloe [https://instagram.com/recoverwithchloe] * Recovery Skills Training: [https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/] use code PODCAST for $57 off! * Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts * Subscribe on YouTube! [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXsP_SerXmcGNULIuPyCNyA]

fear of weight gain, quasi-recovery, and social eating — your questions answered | recovered-ish with chloe cox

You asked, I answered. I get so many DMs and comments with really good recovery questions that deserve more than a quick reply — so this week I'm doing a rapid fire Q&A covering some of the most common and most important ones I've received. We're getting into comparison, quasi-recovery, fear of weight gain, social eating, family dynamics, book recommendations, and more. This one is packed with honest, practical answers — no fluff, no sugarcoating. In This Episode: * How to get out of a comparative mindset — and why comparison is never a fair fight * How long quasi-recovery can last — and what finally takes you out of it * Am I worried about raising a daughter as someone in ED recovery? Honest answer * What to do when fear of weight gain feels completely all-consuming * My top reason to choose recovery every day — and how that's changed over 11 years * How to deal with family members that just don't get it * How to cope with social eating — vacations, outings, dates * Book recommendations for eating disorder recovery and self-help * How to answer "how can I help?" from the people who love you * An update on the second cohort of The Quasi-Recovery Exit Timestamps: 0:00 Intro + life update — new house, birthday, busy May 2:00 Quasi-Recovery Exit second cohort announcement 6:00 Today's episode: rapid fire recovery Q&A 7:00 Q1: How to get out of a comparative mindset 11:00 Why comparison is never a fair fight 12:00 Q2: How to maximize your time in residential treatment 15:00 Total transparency, surrender, and getting messy 16:00 Q3: Am I worried about raising a daughter? 20:00 What I'm doing to prepare and why it fuels my recovery 22:00 Q4: How long can quasi-recovery last — and what takes you out of it? 25:00 Q5: What do you do when fear of weight gain is all-consuming? 28:00 Why the only thing that worked was facing it head-on 29:00 Q6: What is my top reason to choose recovery every day? 31:00 How my reasons have changed over 11 years 32:00 Q7: How do you deal with unhelpful family comments? 35:00 When to educate and when to let it go 36:00 Q8: How do you cope with social eating — vacations, outings, dates? 39:00 Q9: Book recommendations 42:00 Q10: How to answer "how can I help?" from family 45:00 Closing thoughts Books Mentioned: Eating disorder recovery: * Eating in the Light of the Moon – Anita Johnston * The Eight Keys to Recovering from an Eating Disorder — Carolyn Costin * Life Without Ed — Jenni Schaefer * Goodbye Ed, Hello Me — Jenni Schaefer * Intuitive Eating – Elyse Resch and Evelyn Tribole Self-help: * The Power of Now — Eckhart Tolle * A New Earth — Eckhart Tolle * The Four Agreements — Don Miguel Ruiz * The Gifts of Imperfection — Brené Brown * No Bad Parts — Richard Schwartz General reads: * The Secret History — Donna Tartt * The Catcher in the Rye — J.D. Salinger * Fame Sick — Lena Dunham Quotes from This Episode: "Comparing yourself to anyone is unfair. No matter how much you think you know about that person, you will never know as much about that person as you know about yourself." "Good enough isn't as good as it gets." "Your reason to choose recovery doesn't have to make sense to anyone but you." "The eating disorder is not invited on vacation." Resources + Connect with Me: * The Quasi-Recovery Exit — applications open for June cohort: https://recover-with-chloe.moxieapp.com/public/quasi-recovery-exit-application [https://recover-with-chloe.moxieapp.com/public/quasi-recovery-exit-application] * Recovery Skills Training: https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/ [https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/] * Instagram: @recoverwithchloe [https://instagram.com/recoverwithchloe] * Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts * Subscribe on YouTube Keywords/Tags: eating disorder recovery Q&A, fear of weight gain, quasi-recovery, social eating and eating disorders, eating disorder comparison, how to help someone with an eating disorder, eating disorder book recommendations, recovered-ish podcast, chloe cox, ED recovery podcast, eating disorder therapist, recovery questions answered, eating disorder family support, dating and eating disorders Resources + Connect with Me: * Instagram: @recoverwithchloe [https://instagram.com/recoverwithchloe] * Recovery Skills Training: [https://recoverwithchloe.thrivecart.com/recovery-skills-training/] use code PODCAST for $57 off! * Leave a 5-star review on Spotify or Apple Podcasts * Subscribe on YouTube! [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXsP_SerXmcGNULIuPyCNyA]

20. maj 202647 min

what actually causes an eating disorder? | recovered-ish with chloe cox

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