Callais Is Worse Than You Think. No, Even More Worse. Nope, STILL WORSE THAN THAT.

Molly Hemingway's Alito Book Is EMBARRASSING Propaganda

VR34 - This week in Vapid Response: Vanilla Ice provides the platonic ideal of an amuse douche before we order up an excerpt of the worshipful new Alito biography by the editor-in-chief of The Federalist. We then take a closer look at MAGA’s desperate attacks on Trump accuser E. Jean Carroll as expressed in a recent piece in the Examiner. OA Book Club is coming for all patrons! Sign up now for ad-free listening at patreon.com/law [https://patreon.com/law], and start reading our first selection ahead of our first live Zoom meetup later this month. 1. “Alito Is The Most 'Courageous' Justice You've Never Read About [https://thefederalist.com/2026/04/21/sam-alito-is-the-most-courageous-scotus-justice-youve-never-read-about-until-now/],” Mollie Hemingway, The Federalist (April 21, 2026) 2. Carroll couldn't remember the year. But she remembered to lie [https://archive.is/20260530151128/https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/in_focus/4587071/e-jean-carroll-couldnt-remember-year-but-remembered-to-lie-under-oath/],” Joe Concha, The Examiner (May 30, 2026) Watch us on YouTube! [https://www.youtube.com/@SeriousPodNetwork] Check out the OA Linktree [https://linktr.ee/openingarguments] for all the places to go and things to do!

When Super Soaker Got Sued by a Totally Lame Squirt Gun

OA1266 - Can wearing a corset be considered a “public” use of the product? What makes someone (or some thing) an inventor? What is it exactly that makes the Super Soaker so rad? Get the answers to these questions and more from… patent law? Jenessa walks us through some of her favorite wacky cases (that also teach us core patent law concepts). * Egbert v. Lippmann [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/104/333/], 104 U.S. 333 (1881) * Thaler v. Vidal [https://law.justia.com/cases/federal/appellate-courts/cafc/21-2347/21-2347-2022-08-05.html], 43 F.4th 1207 (2022) * Larami Corp. v. Amron [https://www.nathenson.org/courses/innovations/larami-v-amron/], 27 U.S.P.Q.2d 1280 (E.D. Pa. 1993) * Larami Corp. v. Amron [https://law.justia.com/cases/federal/appellate-courts/F3/91/166/477053/], 91 F.3d 166 (Fed. Cir. 1996) Check out the OA Linktree [https://linktr.ee/openingarguments] for all the places to go and things to do!

Judge Eviscerates Blanche’s DOJ, Tosses Abrego Garcia Indictment

OA1265 - THIS IS SUCH A GOOD NEWS SHOW. Seriously. It was so good that Matt invented a new form of entertainment that you need to hear about. We've got Markwayne saying possibly THE dumbest thing a cabinet member has ever said. We've got a judge absolutely schooling Trump's corrupt DOJ and dismissing the bogus Kilmar Abrego Garcia indictment, AND we've got some interesting emolument talk. Can Florida just give Trump land?

Did Trump’s DHS Just End Green Cards? Not Exactly.

VR33 - Did Trump’s DHS really just “end greencards” for people living in the US? Is everyone here on a visa going to have to return to their home countries--potentially with legal bars to returning of ten years or more--to process their cases? Who is the USCIS policy memo on “adjustment of status” to permanent residency which has caused massive amounts of fear and uncertainty in immigrant communities around the country this past weekend actually targeting, and who might still be able to get through? As always, the answers to these questions are much more nuanced than a 30-second viral video could ever convey and there is real reason to hope beyond the headlines.  Matt has written some of the most thorough analysis yet published since the memo’s release and he is here to tell us that it is many ways both much better and in others much worse than reported. We take a closer look at what the media coverage of this story has gotten wrong (and what it has missed) while going deep on the alleged legal justifications for this new interpretation of the law to see how it all holds up. 1. “Adjustment of Status is a Matter of Discretion and Administrative Grace, and an Extraordinary Relief that Permits Applicants to Dispense with the Ordinary Consular Visa Process,” [https://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/document/memos/PM-602-0199-AdjustmentOfStatusAndDiscretion-20260521.pdf] USCIS Policy Memorandum dated 5/21/26 2. “Did DHS Really Just Stop Processing Greencards? A Closer Look,” [https://deportnation.substack.com/p/did-dhs-just-stop-processing-greencards] Matt Cameron, DEPORTNATION (5/23/26) 3. “Adjusting Expectations [https://deportnation.substack.com/p/adjusting-expectations],” Matt Cameron, DEPORTNATION (May 27, 2026) 4. Matter of Blas [https://www.justice.gov/sites/default/files/eoir/legacy/2012/08/17/2485.pdf], Int. Dec. #2485, BIA (1974)(adopted by AG 1976)  5. Matter of Arai [https://www.justice.gov/sites/default/files/eoir/legacy/2012/08/27/2027.pdf], Int. Dec. #2027, BIA (1970)

Woman in Labor Spent 3 Hours Fighting a Judge on Zoom to Avoid a Forced C-Section

OA1264 - Sherise Doyley was in the early stages of labor, in a hospital bed, preparing to deliver her baby, when nurses wheeled in a computer. On the screen was a judge, notifying her of an emergency order by the State of Florida to attempt to force her to undergo a C-section, instead of first attempting vaginal delivery. For 3 hours she advocated for herself, without an attorney, barely covered in a hospital gown. How was any of this legal? What is happening? Jenessa breaks down the history of our rights to make our own medical decisions and how that is legally modified in pregnancy, Lydia shares her own birth experience and how these situations could be handled with actual compassion, and Thomas holds very still in hopes our eyes are based on movement (just kidding, Thomas is very supportive and also outraged). Come rage against the machine with us and hopefully breathe life into a revived pro-choice movement, before it’s too late. * Amy Yurkanin (Mar. 14, 2026), They Didn’t Want to Have C-Sections. A Judge Would Decide How They Gave Birth [https://www.propublica.org/article/florida-court-ordered-c-sections], ProPublica. * Video clips of Doyley hearing, provided by ProPublica’s Facebook page [https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1ZCFsS7T4s/?mibextid=wwXIfr] * Anuli Njoku, Marian Evans, Lillian Nimo-Sefah, & Jonell Bailey (2023). Listen to the Whispers before They Become Screams: Addressing Black Maternal Morbidity and Mortality in the United States [https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9914526/pdf/healthcare-11-00438.pdf], 11 Healthcare 438. * Brad N. Greenwood, Rachel R. Hardeman, Laura Huang, & Aaron Sojourner (2020), Physician–patient racial concordance and disparities in birthing mortality for newborns [https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC7474610/pdf/pnas.201913405.pdf], 117 Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences 21194. * Maternal Mortality Prevention [https://www.cdc.gov/maternal-mortality/php/pregnancy-mortality-surveillance-data/index.html?cove-tab=1] (Dec. 18, 2025). Data from the Pregnancy Mortality Surveillance System, CDC. * Bracey Harris & Elizabeth Chuck (Jan. 9, 2026), 'Her worst fear has come to pass': Midwife who advocated for Black women dies after giving birth [https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/midwife-advocated-black-women-dies-giving-birth-rcna253106], NBC News. * Camila Domonoske (Apr. 17, 2018), 'Father Of Gynecology,' Who Experimented On Slaves, No Longer On Pedestal In NYC [https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2018/04/17/603163394/-father-of-gynecology-who-experimented-on-slaves-no-longer-on-pedestal-in-nyc], NPR. * Megan L. Swanson, Sara Whetstone, Tushani Illangasekare, & Amy (Meg) Autry (2021), Obstetrics and Gynecology and Reparations: The Debt We Owe (and Continue to Accumulate) [https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8170721/pdf/heq.2021.0015.pdf], 5 Health Equity 353. * Nicole Loy (May 16, 2025), Pain and Gynecology: Raising Standards of Care [https://www.cornellhealthcarereview.org/post/pain-and-gynecology-raising-standards-of-care], The Healthcare Review at Cornell University. * Jess Mador (July 29, 2025), A Brain-Dead Pregnant Woman Was Kept Alive in Georgia. It’s Unclear if State Law Required It [https://kffhealthnews.org/news/brain-dead-pregnant-woman-georgia-personhood/], KFF Health News. * (June 2025), Pregnancy Exceptionalism: A Review of Restrictions on Advance Directives [https://www.pregnancyjusticeus.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/advanced-directives.pdf], Pregnancy Justice. * U.S. Const. amend. IX [https://constitution.congress.gov/constitution/amendment-9/] * Jacobson v. Massachusetts [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/197/11/], 197 U.S. 11 (1905) * Rochin v. California [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/342/165/], 342 U.S. 165 (1952) * Cruzan v. Director [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/497/261/], Missouri Dep't of Health, 497 U.S. 261 (1990) * Washington v. Harper [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/494/210/], 494 U.S. 210 (1990) * Roe v. Wade [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/410/113/], 410 U.S. 113 (1973) * Planned Parenthood of Southeastern Pa. v. Casey [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/505/833/], 505 U.S. 833 (1992) * Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/597/19-1392/], 597 U.S. 215 (2022) * Heller v. Doe [https://supreme.justia.com/cases/federal/us/509/312/], 509 U.S. 312 (1993) * State Dept. of Human Services v. Northern [https://law.justia.com/cases/tennessee/court-of-appeals/1978/563-s-w-2d-197-1.html], 563 S.W.2d 197 (1978) * Lane v. Candura [https://law.justia.com/cases/massachusetts/court-of-appeals/1978/6-mass-app-ct-377-1.html], 6 Mass. App. Ct. 377 (1978) * Koskenoja v. Whitmer [https://drive.google.com/file/d/1GMKoDR_d3K2CnSCjc3FyCkidKWVKU_lL/view], Mich. Ct. Cl. (2026) * (Apr. 20, 2026), Michigan Pregnancy Exclusion Law is Unconstitutional [https://compassionandchoices.org/news/michigan-pregnancy-exclusion-law-is-unconstitutional/], Compassion & Choices. Check out the OA Linktree [https://linktr.ee/openingarguments] for all the places to go and things to do!