From Secret Service to Surrogacy: A Dad's Journey Through Grief, Growth, and Building Legacy: Cory Allen

When Life Hits Hard: Navigating Job Loss, Entrepreneurship, and Emotional Regulation as a Dad: Tony Berardo

Tony Berardo [https://www.instagram.com/theberardo], a full-time content creator and father to a 2.5-year-old daughter, opens up about the raw realities of modern fatherhood when his wife unexpectedly gets laid off after 10 years with her company. This honest conversation explores the emotional weight of being the sole provider, learning to regulate emotions alongside your toddler, and the constant tension between building a business and being present for your family. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: [00:01:20] - The Weight of Sudden Job Loss Tony's wife gets laid off after 10 years with a multi-billion dollar company Key quote: "Nothing is guaranteed. Even if you're at a big corporation where she thought she was going to retire, and now she just got laid off for no reason." [00:03:33] - The Entrepreneur Dad's Dilemma Balancing work-from-home entrepreneurship with wanting to be present for his daughter Key quote: "I want to work hard and support the family, but I also just want to be with my kid. So that's the struggle." [00:05:32] - Breaking Down Emotional Walls Discussion about men's tendency to suppress emotions and the importance of communication in marriage Key quote: "We put up a wall and we try to be tough and strong for everybody, but mentally we're struggling." [00:09:45] - The "Other Room" Strategy Tony's method for self-regulating before speaking to his wife during stressful times Key quote: "I'm going to go to the other room where she's not in and say it out loud and see if it makes sense." [00:16:46] - The "One Day" Realization Prioritizing play time with his daughter over work demands Key quote: "One day your kid's not going to ask you to play with them. So that hurts if you say, 'Hey, sweetie, 10 more minutes.'" [00:19:16] - Learning Emotional Regulation Through Fatherhood How becoming a girl dad forced Tony to develop patience and emotional intelligence Key quote: "I realized how shitty I am at self-regulating. I realized how angry I can get." [00:23:50] - Teaching Emotional Regulation Together Practicing breathing exercises and emotional regulation with his daughter Key quote: "Kids never listen to what you say, but they're always going to do what you do." [00:27:10] - The Mirror Moment Realizing his daughter was copying his behavior with their dog Key quote: "She said, 'Oliver, enough!' And I was like, do I say that a lot?" [00:32:25] - Embracing Different Interests The importance of letting children develop their own hobbies rather than forcing parental interests Key quote: "I want their hobbies and things that they like to be different than mine." [00:37:43] - The Dad Connection Gap Challenges men face in opening up to other fathers about parenting struggles Key quote: "It's one of those isolating things I think that men just have to get over." [00:39:52] - The Blowout Story A humorous tale of an epic diaper disaster at a thrift store Key quote: "If the wife says pack a diaper bag, just do it, dude." On June 17th, I’m hosting a free, live workshop, Become a Better Leader By Becoming a Better Dad, for fathers who are tired of living a divided life. We’ll explore how “Default Dad” shows up when you’re tired, overloaded, or distracted, and how those same patterns affect your leadership at home and at work. Register here: https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader [https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader?utm_source=chatgpt.com] Sign Up for the Ambitious Dads Newsletter: https://www.ambitiousdads.com Connect with Jeff Hittner: https://jeffhittner.com Subscribe on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ambitious-dads/id1815863328 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4xCHG30Ms9wcGRJmDqHcW8?si=46654ba2a0654099 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AmbitiousDads

From Absent Father to Present Dad: Building Emotional Intelligence While Growing a Business: Edward Rivera

Edward Rivera shares his powerful journey of breaking generational cycles, building emotional regulation skills, and creating the family presence he never had growing up. This conversation dives deep into practical strategies for managing anger, communicating vulnerably with children, and balancing entrepreneurship with intentional fatherhood. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: [00:02:44] - Intentional Business Growth for Family Presence * Edward explains how he structured his 10-year business journey to avoid becoming an absent father * Key quote: "I didn't want to be that guy 20 years deep, right? Didn't know his kids and stuff." [00:04:59] - Breaking Generational Cycles * Discussion of Edward's relationship with his absent father and commitment to being present * Key quote: "I always told myself, when I have a family and kids, I'm going to do my best to try to be there as much as possible." [00:07:22] - Managing Inherited Anger Triggers * Edward shares how he catches himself in moments of road rage and family protection instincts * Key quote: "I'll have this inner dialogue right in the moment too. I was like, all right, calm down. It's not big deal." [00:08:54] - Early Therapy and Self-Regulation Skills * Childhood therapy experience that taught breathing techniques and emotional regulation * Key quote: "She was like, you, you're growing up too fast. Try to be a kid. Just do kid things." [00:12:09] - The Relationship Turning Point * Edward's realization during an argument with his wife that led to years of communication work * Key quote: "I remember she started crying and I was like, holy crap. I felt like shit. You know what I mean? I'm like, what am I doing?" [00:15:02] - The Coffee Bean Philosophy * Explanation of how Edward approaches every interaction with positivity and service * Key quote: "Every environment you go into, every person you have interaction with, try to spread positivity, love, try to serve others." [00:19:46] - Emotional Regulation Strategies * Edward's practical approach to managing bad moods and protecting family from negative energy * Key quote: "I've even texted my team before, Hey, I'm in a bad mood. I'm going to be no good to anybody right now." [00:20:52] - Teaching Emotional Intelligence to Children * How Edward and his wife model vulnerability and emotional processing for their kids * Key quote: "We try to be as open, as transparent as we can with the kids at a safe level, not trying to stress them out and trauma dump on 'em." [00:25:35] - Homeschooling Decision and Partnership * The family's choice to homeschool and how Edward supports his wife's educational leadership * Key quote: "I feel so blessed now to finally get to this point where I'll be able to help sometimes." [00:32:57] - The Power of Vulnerable Male Friendships * Edward emphasizes the importance of having men to talk to about struggles and mistakes * Key quote: "The biggest thing, again, man, is finding other men who are willing to talk about these things and being vulnerable." On June 17th, I’m hosting a free, live workshop, Become a Better Leader By Becoming a Better Dad, for fathers who are tired of living a divided life. We’ll explore how “Default Dad” shows up when you’re tired, overloaded, or distracted, and how those same patterns affect your leadership at home and at work. Register here: https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader [https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader?utm_source=chatgpt.com] Sign Up for the Ambitious Dads Newsletter: https://www.ambitiousdads.com Connect with Jeff Hittner: https://jeffhittner.com Subscribe on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ambitious-dads/id1815863328 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4xCHG30Ms9wcGRJmDqHcW8?si=46654ba2a0654099 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AmbitiousDads

From Hollywood to Humble Parenting: Randy Spelling on Raising Teenage Daughters with Curiosity and Grace

Former actor Randy Spelling [https://randyspelling.com] opens up about the realities of parenting two teenage daughters while navigating his own transformation from addiction to authentic fatherhood. In this honest conversation, Randy shares practical wisdom on listening versus solving, embracing failure as a teaching tool, and how his past mistakes became the foundation for deeper connections with his kids. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: [00:01:27] - Updating Your Vision of Your Kids * Randy discusses the challenge of relating to daughters as they grow and change * Key quote: "There are still parts of her brain that are not online yet. There are still synaptic connections that physiologically are not there putting things together." [00:03:35] - Listening vs. Solving: The Dad Dilemma * Explores how men's natural problem-solving instincts can interfere with emotional connection * Key quote: "Get really curious about the being in front of you... How can I see them and meet them where they're at?" [00:07:53] - Managing Morning Moods Without Taking It Personally * Randy shares how he handles his daughter's grumpiness by changing his own energy first * Key quote: "This has nothing to do with you. Just get curious or just be there. Just hold space." [00:10:28] - Sharing Your Past Mistakes with Kids * Discussion on age-appropriate honesty about personal struggles and addiction * Key quote: "I had to trust that my relationship was strong enough and close enough that they see me now I can share my past." [00:19:27] - Encouraging Failure as a Learning Tool * How to reframe failure as experimentation and growth opportunities * Key quote: "Failures are catalysts... you have to try something and have it not work out to know what you need to change." [00:22:18] - The Shame Cycle of Parental Mistakes * Randy shares personal examples of everyday mistakes and internal shame dialogue * Key quote: "You made a mistake. You did the best that you could... This says nothing about your character." [00:34:19] - Co-Parenting Through Different Perspectives * Navigating different parenting styles and finding middle ground through shared values * Key quote: "The sweet spot is where can you agree and come to the middle based off of values?" KEY TAKEAWAYS: 1. Curiosity and genuine listening are more powerful than trying to solve every problem your kids present. 2. Age-appropriate honesty about your past mistakes can strengthen rather than weaken your relationship with your children. 3. Encouraging failure and reframing it as learning helps build resilience in kids. 4. Managing your own emotional state directly impacts your children's energy and responses. 5. Co-parenting works best when you focus on shared values rather than rigid rules. 6. Self-compassion modeling teaches children how to treat themselves when they make mistakes. On June 17th, I’m hosting a free, live workshop, Become a Better Leader By Becoming a Better Dad, for fathers who are tired of living a divided life. We’ll explore how “Default Dad” shows up when you’re tired, overloaded, or distracted, and how those same patterns affect your leadership at home and at work. Register here: https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader [https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader?utm_source=chatgpt.com] Sign Up for the Ambitious Dads Newsletter: https://www.ambitiousdads.com Connect with Jeff Hittner: https://jeffhittner.com Subscribe on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ambitious-dads/id1815863328 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4xCHG30Ms9wcGRJmDqHcW8?si=46654ba2a0654099 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AmbitiousDads

Building Legacy Through Intentional Fatherhood with Brandon Harrison

Brandon Harrison, CEO and father of three, shares his journey of intentional parenting after losing his father at 63. From managing three kids four years apart to taking solo cruises for self-care, Brandon offers honest insights on emotional regulation, mentorship, and building a lasting legacy as a father. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: [00:02:06] - Managing Three Different Personalities * Discussion on parenting three children who are four years apart with completely different needs * Key quote: "My big word for myself is intentionality. I'm really focused on acknowledging their differences and really focusing on that." [00:04:28] - Individual Time with Each Child * Brandon explains his approach to one-on-one time, including zoo dates with his daughter and community walks with his middle son * Key quote: "I don't just say, okay, everybody, let's go to the zoo, because our oldest son doesn't like that anymore." [00:09:37] - Self-Care and Solo Retreats * How Brandon and his wife prioritize individual time off, including solo cruises and personal activities * Key quote: "I'm going on two solo cruises this year. My wife and I just started that a few years ago and we realized that we both have a lot going on." [00:17:39] - Impact of Losing His Father * Brandon shares how his father's sudden death at 63 transformed his approach to fatherhood * Key quote: "That really changed my thinking of fatherhood, of like, okay, I need to make sure that I'm learning from older fathers, but I'm so intentional with my kids because I never know how long I have." [00:22:03] - Breaking Generational Patterns * Discussion on helping other fathers overcome father wounds and develop emotional vulnerability * Key quote: "You've got to force yourself to express to your spouse what you're actually feeling." [00:28:28] - Learning Emotional Regulation as a Young Father * Brandon's honest account of becoming a father at 22 and learning to manage emotions through parenting * Key quote: "I'm still growing into being better at that. Honestly, I have not mastered that part of my emotions." [00:35:36] - Current Fatherhood Concerns * What keeps Brandon up at night: friend influences, college preparation, and preparing kids for an uncertain future * Key quote: "I only have two more years left with this oldest. And I'm like, I feel like I'm not as far along as I want to be with him." [00:39:15] - Legacy Over Money * Brandon's reflection on what kind of legacy he wants to leave as a father beyond financial provision * Key quote: "I really want to leave a legacy for my children, not just money... really what you leave in them as people." KEY TAKEAWAYS: 1. Intentionality is the key difference between good and great fatherhood - actively adapting to each child's unique needs and developmental stage. 2. Self-care isn't selfish - both parents need individual time to recharge and maintain their identity outside of parenting. 3. Vulnerability and honest conversations with other fathers create stronger support networks and better parenting outcomes. 4. Losing a parent young can transform your approach to fatherhood, emphasizing presence over just provision. 5. Legacy is about the values and character you instill in your children, not just the financial security you provide. On June 17th, I’m hosting a free, live workshop, Become a Better Leader By Becoming a Better Dad, for fathers who are tired of living a divided life. We’ll explore how “Default Dad” shows up when you’re tired, overloaded, or distracted, and how those same patterns affect your leadership at home and at work. Register here: https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader [https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader?utm_source=chatgpt.com] Sign Up for the Ambitious Dads Newsletter: https://www.ambitiousdads.com Connect with Jeff Hittner: https://jeffhittner.com Subscribe on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ambitious-dads/id1815863328 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4xCHG30Ms9wcGRJmDqHcW8?si=46654ba2a0654099 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AmbitiousDads

Strategic Absence & Second Chances: A CFP's Journey Through Paternity Leave & Intentional Fatherhood

Mark Willis [https://www.linkedin.com/in/marklakegrowth], a certified financial planner and father of two, shares his experience taking paternity leave as a business owner while welcoming his second daughter 10 years after his first. He discusses the challenges of rebalancing family life, the power of strategic absence in both business and parenting, and how intentionality transforms the parenting experience. From financial wisdom for families to the messy realities of newborn life, this conversation offers practical insights for ambitious dads navigating work-life integration. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS: [00:01:18] - Taking Paternity Leave as a Business Owner * Mark discusses the blessing and curse of naming your own time off as an entrepreneur * Key quote: "I don't really have the word retirement in my own vocabulary. To retire means to put out of service, and I don't want that for me" [00:04:59] - The Power of Strategic Absence * How stepping away from business and parenting can create growth and reduce anxiety * Key quote: "If you feel like you're the one that has to show up and tie everybody's shoes for the rest of their life, you're going to have a 30-year-old come over to your house every day asking, Hey, dad, can you still tie my shoes" [00:07:43] - Parenting Children of Different Ages * Managing the balance between pulling children toward your heart and letting them fly * Key quote: "Children are like a quiver of arrows... you put it in the bow and you pull it toward your heart, and then you have to let it go" [00:16:13] - Redefining Daily Rhythms with a Newborn * The challenge of losing structure and predictability when welcoming a new baby * Key quote: "The biggest thing that I have found in my life in these last three months has just been the reorientation of our daily cycle" [00:21:33] - Doing Parenthood Differently the Second Time * The importance of intentional preparation and treating parenting like a part-time job * Key quote: "The best gift you can give your child is another sibling" [00:24:23] - The Principle of Intentional Living * How being hard on yourself makes the world easier * Key quote: "If you're easy on yourself, the world is hard. If you're hard on yourself, the world is easy" [00:30:03] - Financial Planning for Families * Teaching children about money, entrepreneurship, and delayed gratification * Key quote: "You don't want to just prepare the money for the kids. You must prepare the kids for the money" [00:36:49] - Practical Savings Strategies * Starting small and gradually increasing savings rates over time * Key quote: "What if you're listening to this and you're feeling overwhelmed, 30% is way too much. Don't eat that elephant" KEY TAKEAWAYS: 1. Strategic absence in both business and parenting allows others to grow and reduces your anxiety. 2. Great dads are intentional - they plan, prepare, and treat parenting as seriously as their careers. 3. Financial health requires starting where you are and gradually increasing savings rates over time. 4. Different aged children require different expectations and consequences 5. The transition to multiple children requires intentional effort to maintain connection with your spouse. 6. Teaching children entrepreneurial thinking prepares them for an uncertain future. On June 17th, I’m hosting a free, live workshop, Become a Better Leader By Becoming a Better Dad, for fathers who are tired of living a divided life. We’ll explore how “Default Dad” shows up when you’re tired, overloaded, or distracted, and how those same patterns affect your leadership at home and at work. Register here: https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader [https://www.ambitiousdads.com/better-dad-better-leader?utm_source=chatgpt.com] Sign Up for the Ambitious Dads Newsletter: https://www.ambitiousdads.com Connect with Jeff Hittner: https://jeffhittner.com Subscribe on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/ambitious-dads/id1815863328 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4xCHG30Ms9wcGRJmDqHcW8?si=46654ba2a0654099 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@AmbitiousDads