Who Loves Someone With Addiction?

The Conversation That Changed Everything — Part 2 with Anna Bjurstam, Six Senses Wellness Pioneer

Dr. Safia Debar continues her conversation with Anna Bjurstam of Six Senses about integrating scientific and spiritual approaches to health, challenging the separation between clinician and soul. They discuss how practices like prayer, meditation, breathwork, and time in nature connect people with the heart, and how Eastern systems (especially Ayurveda and Panchakarma, alongside TCM and Tibetan medicine) can address ailments Western medicine often cannot, while Western care is essential for trauma and acute issues. They explore why doctors avoid recommending spiritual practices due to taboo, religion, liability, and demand for quick fixes, and emphasize a cultural shift driven by mental health needs. Anna cites research linking spiritual practice to lower depression (82%), lower suicide (94%), reduced all-cause mortality (33%), improved immune function (60%), and lower inflammation, framing placebo as faith. Anna shares her routine (meditation, yoga, limiting morning phone use, walking, and HRV tracking) and both reflect on avoiding burnout from over-optimization, integrating spirituality into daily life, and reclaiming silence, contemplation, and “auditing” one’s life. 00:00 Why This Series Exists 03:11 Spirituality Without Religion 05:22 East Meets West Healing 08:04 Why Doctors Avoid Prayer 11:43 You Are Already Whole 16:51 Science Behind Spiritual Practice 21:41 Anna’s Daily Rituals 26:47 Integrating Work and Spirit 30:31 Reflect and Audit Your Life 32:52 Closing and Next Episode Connect with Dr Safia Debar Dr Safia Debar Speaker / Coach | Medical Doctor | Breathwork Facilitator  One of Tatler's "Top 21 private doctors in Britain" 2020 www.drsafiadebar.com [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/] contact@drsafiadebar.com [contact@drsafiadebar.com] IG: @drsafiadebar [https://www.instagram.com/drsafiadebar?igsh=dm44aDR3dzB2bjgx] Tiktok: drsafiadebar [https://www.tiktok.com/@drsafiadebar?_r=1&_t=ZN-91VDvrYeBnC] Find our free resources here: www.drsafiadebar.com/resource [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/resource]

The confession — and the conversation that started everything — Part 1 with Anna Bjurstam

Dr. Safia Debar introduces a podcast series on spirituality as a free, evidence-backed intervention linked in peer-reviewed research to improved heart rate variability, lower blood pressure, reduced cardiovascular and stroke risk, lower inflammatory markers, reduced depression and suicide risk, better sleep and pain outcomes, enhanced T-cell activation, improved cancer survival, gene-expression changes, and lower all-cause mortality with longer lifespan. She explains why spirituality is largely absent from medical appointments and why she has been publicly “science heavy,” then frames an exploration of ancient holistic premises that body, mind, and soul are one. In part one of her conversation with Six Senses Wellness Pioneer Anna Bjurstam, they discuss translating science and spiritual knowledge into practical offerings, audience-dependent framing, meaning and purpose, Vipassana and shamanic work, common themes of overwhelm and disconnection, nervous-system resets, curiosity over judgment, quantum physics as a bridge, business pushback, ethical boundaries, and the limits of convincing entrenched beliefs. 00:00 A Miracle Intervention Tease 03:34 Meet Dr Safia Debar 04:02 The Intervention Is Spirituality 05:11 Why I Stayed Science Heavy 07:47 A New Series Begins 08:46 Ancient Wisdom Meets Data 10:54 Anna Bjurstam Origin Story 13:08 Welcome Anna To The Show 15:13 Making Spirituality Mainstream 15:40 Meaning Purpose And Curiosity 19:19 Near Death And Vipassana 22:00 Ego And Heart Language 24:51 Wealth Disconnection And Overwhelm 26:38 Sharpen The Axe Reset Tools 30:00 Bridging Science And Spirit 32:29 Business Pushback And Ethics 35:51 You Cant Convince Beliefs 38:54 Part One Wrap Up Connect with Dr Safia Debar Dr Safia Debar Speaker / Coach | Medical Doctor | Breathwork Facilitator  One of Tatler's "Top 21 private doctors in Britain" 2020 www.drsafiadebar.com [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/] contact@drsafiadebar.com [contact@drsafiadebar.com] IG: @drsafiadebar [https://www.instagram.com/drsafiadebar?igsh=dm44aDR3dzB2bjgx] Tiktok: drsafiadebar [https://www.tiktok.com/@drsafiadebar?_r=1&_t=ZN-91VDvrYeBnC] Find our free resources here: www.drsafiadebar.com/resource [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/resource]

Holding It All Together? This Letter Is for You

Dr. S continues a multi-episode exploration of addiction and rescuer dynamics, following episode 58 and subsequent conversations about loving someone with addiction, why people stay in these patterns, and how to care without losing oneself. This episode shares anonymized client stories showing how support can shift into responsibility, with partners and parents becoming hypervigilant “monitors” whose nervous systems and identities organize around another person’s unpredictability, including substance use, gambling, and “respectable” work and risk-taking addictions. The stories highlight exhaustion, health symptoms, and lives revolving around anticipating crises and preventing catastrophe. Dr. S then reads “A Letter to the Rescuer,” affirming deep love while emphasizing that understanding someone’s wounds does not make one responsible for their recovery, encouraging stepping out of the rescuer role, reclaiming self, tolerating uncertainty about outcomes, and seeking support. 00:00 Series Recap and Setup 03:03 When Compassion Becomes Duty 04:25 Story Reading Emotional Weather 06:12 Story Gambling and Hypervigilance 08:04 Story Parenting and Identity Loss 10:05 Story Respectable Addiction 11:07 Letter to the Rescuer 14:12 Reclaiming Self and Uncertainty 15:42 Closing Support and Breath Connect with Dr Safia Debar Dr Safia Debar Speaker / Coach | Medical Doctor | Breathwork Facilitator  One of Tatler's "Top 21 private doctors in Britain" 2020 www.drsafiadebar.com [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/] contact@drsafiadebar.com [contact@drsafiadebar.com] IG: @drsafiadebar [https://www.instagram.com/drsafiadebar?igsh=dm44aDR3dzB2bjgx] Tiktok: drsafiadebar [https://www.tiktok.com/@drsafiadebar?_r=1&_t=ZN-91VDvrYeBnC] Find our free resources here: www.drsafiadebar.com/resource [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/resource]

How to Love Without Losing Yourself

Dr. S continues the addiction series by focusing on loved ones and the central question of how to love someone with addiction without losing yourself, staying compassionate without becoming responsible, and stepping out of the rescuer role. The episode describes a turning point where the rescuer recognizes the cost of living in someone else’s “storm,” shifts from action to awareness, and adopts principles such as not causing the addiction, not being able to control it, and giving your life its own center of gravity while distinguishing support from rescue. Dr. S outlines phases including hypervigilance/checking, researching solutions, chronic stress physiology, confused emotions and trust erosion, and quiet clarity. Healing involves telling the truth, observing, seeking safe support, rebuilding identity and relationships, using therapy and somatic practices, addressing physiology with health screening and gradual lifestyle shifts, and viewing the addict–rescuer dynamic as an interactive “dance” explored with curiosity rather than blame. 00:00 Series Setup and Core Question 02:06 The Turning Point Moment 03:34 Shift the Spotlight to You 04:45 Principles Before Action 07:12 Step Back and Observe 08:29 Beyond One Relationship Pattern 11:49 Phases of the Rescuer Cycle 17:40 Clarity and Support Systems 21:35 Healing Body and Identity 25:08 Wrap Up and The Dance Dynamic 28:03 Journaling Prompts and Next Episode If you recognise yourself in some of these patterns, I’d like to offer a few more journaling prompts to reflect on and I’ll add them to the show notes but I’ll also read them out here. You don’t have to answer them immediately. Just notice what arises. Ask yourself: * Where in my life do I feel responsible for another person’s emotional stability? * When something goes wrong in their life, do I immediately feel the need to fix it? * How much of my time and energy is spent anticipating someone else’s reactions? * And perhaps the most important question: * If I stepped out of the role of rescuer — who would I be? * What parts of my life might return? * What parts of myself might reappear? Connect with Dr Safia Debar Dr Safia Debar Speaker / Coach | Medical Doctor | Breathwork Facilitator  One of Tatler's "Top 21 private doctors in Britain" 2020 www.drsafiadebar.com [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/] contact@drsafiadebar.com [contact@drsafiadebar.com] IG: @drsafiadebar [https://www.instagram.com/drsafiadebar?igsh=dm44aDR3dzB2bjgx] Tiktok: drsafiadebar [https://www.tiktok.com/@drsafiadebar?_r=1&_t=ZN-91VDvrYeBnC] Find our free resources here: www.drsafiadebar.com/resource [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/resource]

Why Do We Stay for So Long?

Dr. S continues a series on addiction by exploring why empathic, responsible people stay in rescuer dynamics and why leaving can feel so hard, framing it through attachment patterns, nervous-system regulation, and behavioral psychology. She explains how helping can trigger bonding and reward chemicals (oxytocin, dopamine, endorphins), conditioning a cycle where purpose becomes tied to managing another’s distress, especially when chronic dysregulation replaces true co-regulation. Early caregiving roles and caretaking attachment can prime people for “overfunctioning empathy,” while intermittent reinforcement (unpredictable good moments amid relapse) can intensify attachment and contribute to trauma bonding. She distinguishes compassion from responsibility and lists key truths (they own their healing; potential isn’t reality; you can’t love someone into recovery; small betrayals erode trust; hope can keep you stuck; your life matters). She also outlines what doesn’t work: fixing, monitoring, shielding consequences, empty ultimatums, and making recovery your purpose. 00:00 Why We Stay 02:59 Listen to the Quiet Truth 04:26 Rescuer Neurobiology 09:28 Attachment and Caretaking 12:28 Intermittent Reinforcement 14:37 Hard Truths List 20:28 Compassion vs Responsibility 26:05 Ten Reality Checks 33:37 What Doesnt Work 37:05 Reclaim Yourself 38:21 Next Episode Teaser Connect with Dr Safia Debar Dr Safia Debar Speaker / Coach | Medical Doctor | Breathwork Facilitator  One of Tatler's "Top 21 private doctors in Britain" 2020 www.drsafiadebar.com [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/] contact@drsafiadebar.com [contact@drsafiadebar.com] IG: @drsafiadebar [https://www.instagram.com/drsafiadebar?igsh=dm44aDR3dzB2bjgx] Tiktok: drsafiadebar [https://www.tiktok.com/@drsafiadebar?_r=1&_t=ZN-91VDvrYeBnC] Find our free resources here: www.drsafiadebar.com/resource [https://www.drsafiadebar.com/resource]