Ep27: Why Your Needs Are Not a Burden and How to Start Asking Again

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Why Your Needs Are Not a Burden "I'm fine with whatever." "Don't worry about me." "I don't need much." Sound familiar? Somewhere along the way you learned that wanting things is selfish. That having needs makes you a burden. That the right thing to do is put everyone else first and deal with whatever's left over. So you stopped asking. You became the easy-going one, the low-maintenance one, the one who never causes trouble. But your needs didn't disappear just because you stopped voicing them. They went underground, and they're showing up as exhaustion, resentment, numbness, and that hollow feeling of giving and giving with nothing left. This episode explores why your needs are not selfish, why ignoring them is destroying your health, relationships, and self-worth, and how to start reconnecting with what you actually want. What you'll learn: ✦ The three psychological needs every human requires to thrive (self-determination theory) ✦ Why you learned to suppress your needs and how it made sense at the time ✦ What happens to your body, relationships, and identity when you consistently ignore what you want ✦ Why envy is actually one of the most useful emotions you can feel ✦ The difference between needs and strategies and why it matters ✦ How to start reconnecting with what you want after years of suppressing it Perfect for anyone who puts everyone else first, goes blank when asked "what do you need?", or confuses having needs with being selfish. 🧘 This week's practice: Identify one need you've been ignoring and take one step toward meeting it. Rest, connection, play, solitude, whatever it is. One need. One step. No apology. 📚 Book: "Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?" by Dr Julie Smith 🌙 The Restful Mind Sleepcast: new episodes weekly. ☕ Support the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/therestfulmind [https://buymeacoffee.com/therestfulmind] #peoplepleasing #peoplepleaserrecovery #healingjourney #selfworth #mentalhealth #boundaries #emotionalhealing #therapypodcast #restfulmind #healingpodcast #burnout #resentment #innerwork #selfcompassion #caregiversburnout #emotionalneeds #settingboundaries #exhaustion #selfcare #codependencyrecovery #lowmaintenance #askinforwhatyouneed #needsarenotselfish #reconnectwithyourself

Ep30: Your Worth Was Never Something You Had to Earn | The Healing Journey

Self-esteem goes up when things go well and crashes when they don't. It depends on achievements, approval, and how your day is going. Self-worth is different. Self-worth is the deep, quiet knowing that you are valuable, not because of what you do, but because you exist. It doesn't fluctuate. It doesn't depend on anyone. It's not earned. It's recognised. Most of us have spent our entire lives trying to earn our worth through performance, usefulness, perfection, or invisibility. Those patterns made sense as children. They were accurate readings of the environment we grew up in. But they were never accurate readings of our actual value. A child who isn't loved isn't unlovable. They just weren't loved by those particular people in that particular situation. This is the final episode of Phase 3 and the halfway point of the entire series. Everything from the last ten episodes comes together here, showing you how every practice you've done has been quietly building a foundation of self-worth through action, not affirmations. What you'll learn: ✦ The difference between self-esteem and self-worth (and why it changes everything) ✦ Where you learned what you're worth and why those lessons were wrong ✦ Why affirmations don't work and what builds real self-worth instead ✦ How every Phase 3 practice has been depositing evidence into your self-worth account ✦ The four things that erode self-worth: comparison, external validation, conditional self-acceptance, and the inner critic ✦ What solid self-worth actually looks like in everyday life ✦ How to create a personal worth statement that speaks to your specific patterns Perfect for anyone who's spent their whole life trying to earn the right to exist, who ties their value to achievements or approval, or who's ready to stop building on sand and start building on something real. 🧘 This week's practice: Create a personal worth statement. One sentence that reminds you of your inherent value, independent of what you do or achieve. Write it down. Put it where you'll see it daily. When the old voice comes, read it. 📚 Book: "Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself" by Kristin Neff - The researcher behind over 5,000 studies on self-compassion explains why treating yourself with kindness builds a more stable sense of worth than self-esteem ever could. 🌙 The Restful Mind Sleepcast - new episodes weekly. ☕ Support the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/therestfulmind [https://buymeacoffee.com/therestfulmind] #selfworth #selfesteem #healingjourney #mentalhealth #youareenough #inherentworth #selfacceptance #innercritic #comparison #externalvalidation #emotionalhealing #therapypodcast #restfulmind #healingpodcast #innerwork #selfcompassion #worthyoflove #phase3finale #selfworthisnotearned #unconditionalworth #tarabrach #radicalacceptance #knowyourworth

8 de jun de 202624 min

Ep27: Why Your Needs Are Not a Burden and How to Start Asking Again | The Healing Journey

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