Why Your Brain Focuses on the Negative (And Won't Let Go)

Why Your Brain Focuses on the Negative (And Won't Let Go)

You walk into a room and nineteen people tell you that you look great. One person gives you a look. You spend the rest of the day thinking about the one person. That's not a character flaw — it's biology. Your brain is literally wired to prioritize threat over praise, and that wiring quietly erodes self-confidence over time. Dr. Kat breaks down why the brain reacts more powerfully to negativity (tracing it back to our fight-or-flight survival instincts and the role of the amygdala), and what you can actually do to start retraining it — including a straightforward "confidence challenge" around accepting and giving compliments. She also talks about the underrated role of nature, small acts of kindness, and changing the story you tell yourself when something frustrating happens. None of it is complicated, but it requires a conscious choice — which is exactly what this episode is about. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ [https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/] Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat] YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat] X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat [https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat] Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/ [https://mindbodyseries.com/]

Breaking Generational Trauma: Trash Bag at 12, Dad of 5 at 50.

Most of us inherit something from the people who raised us — a temper, a coping pattern, a way of speaking to children that sounds disturbingly familiar coming out of our own mouths. Breaking that inheritance is one of the hardest psychological projects a person can take on, and almost no one is given a map for it. This week Dr. Kat sits with Rob Scheer, founder of the international nonprofit Comfort Cases, a CNN Hero, and someone who entered foster care at 12 carrying a black trash bag and walked out homeless at 18 carrying another one. Rob talks openly about surviving sexual abuse, four suicide attempts, and the moment at 24 when he knelt at his mother's unmarked grave and chose to forgive — not as a gift to her, but to take his power back. He and Dr. Kat dig into why foster youth carry PTSD at twice the rate of combat veterans, why empathy and legacy have to be taught rather than inherited, and what it actually takes to be a parent when you had no model for one. If you've ever wondered whether the cycle can really stop with you, this is the conversation. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ [https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/] Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat] YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat] X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat [https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat] Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/ [https://mindbodyseries.com/]

Paint the Room Yellow Part 2: Emotional Neglect in Marriage

You asked your partner to paint the room yellow. They bought a new bed, a new carpet, moved the furniture — and now they're irritated you're still asking about the wall. That quiet, repeated experience of being given everything except what you asked for is one of the most common forms of emotional neglect in marriage, and it's what Dr. Kat unpacks in Part 2, responding to viewers who recognized themselves in Part 1. She works through what's happening when a partner deflects with "nothing I do would make you happy," why "I just do it myself" sounds empowering but is usually resignation in disguise, and the moment the person asking finally goes quiet — and why that silence is the real warning. She also shares a one-week exercise she gives couples (it involves your dog) and a hard truth about why loyalty isn't something anyone earns an award for. If you've felt invisible in your own marriage, this one names it. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ [https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/] Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat] YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat] X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat [https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat] Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/ [https://mindbodyseries.com/]

Skincare for Teens: Parents Are Losing the TikTok Battle

Your kid won't listen to you about skincare, but they'll do whatever a fifteen-second TikTok tells them — and right now that means slathering retinols, acids, and anti-aging serums meant for fifty-year-olds onto teenage skin. Dr. Kat sits down with dermatologist and Mohs surgeon Dr. Angela Casey, who removes skin cancers all day and founded the teen skincare line Bright Girl, to unpack why the products promising clearer skin are often making it worse. You'll learn which trendy ingredients actually damage a young skin barrier, the one step that matters at every age, and why "smart skin starts now" isn't about vanity but about habits that hold up for life. Dr. Casey also gets into the grown-up stuff parents wonder about — preventative Botox, why people are dissolving their fillers, and the real reason certain celebrities suddenly look so different. If you've ever lost the bathroom-counter argument, this one's for you. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ [https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/] Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat] YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat] X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat [https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat] Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/ [https://mindbodyseries.com/]

If Your Child Is Being Bullied At School, Most Parents Get This Wrong

When a kid comes home from school upset, most parents brace for the wrong thing. They worry about the kid who's throwing punches — but Dr. Kat Derrig-Palumbo, a licensed psychologist and former advisor to Dr. Phil, sees something different in her practice. The adults in her therapy room aren't 30, 40, even 50 years out from the kid who hit them. They're still carrying the words. A sentence said in passing in seventh grade that somehow kept playing for the next three decades. And the people who said it often didn't even believe what they were saying. This episode opens a series on bullying with a parent-focused walk through six kinds — physical, verbal, social, cyber, sexual, and prejudicial — and the case for why verbal bullying lands deepest and lasts longest. Dr. Kat shares a story from her time on Dr. Phil that crystallizes the stakes, asks why schools require sexual-misconduct paperwork but nothing equivalent for bullying, and offers concrete language for how to approach the school when your child is being targeted — including what to say instead of demanding the other kid be punished. I want to hear from you!  To submit show ideas or be considered as a guest, visit https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/ [https://chatwithdrkat.com/contact/] Follow Chat with Dr. Kat: Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.facebook.com/chatwithdrkat] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat [https://www.instagram.com/chatwithdrkat] YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.youtube.com/@chatwithdrkat] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat [https://www.tiktok.com/@chatwithdrkat] X:  https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat [https://x.com/ChatwithDrKat] Health & Wellness Programs: https://mindbodyseries.com/ [https://mindbodyseries.com/]