Raising Arrows

The Myth of the Perfect Dad

34 min · 19. apr. 2026
episode The Myth of the Perfect Dad cover

Beskrivelse

You're spending more time with your kids than your dad ever spent with you — and somehow the guilt is worse than ever. Connor and Pastor Scott tackle the myth of the perfect dad head-on: where it comes from, why social media is lying to you, and why your kids don't need a flawless father. They just need a present one. In this episode: * Why 57% of parents report burnout — and what's actually driving it (Ohio State University, 2024) * The science of "Dad Brain" — how fatherhood literally rewires your brain and why your role is irreplaceable * Why consistency beats intensity every single time * What it looks like to be a steady, predictable anchor in your kid's chaotic little world Anchor Verse: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." — 2 Corinthians 12:9 The world will tell you you're not enough. God says your weakness is exactly where He shows up.

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Alle episoder

7 episoder

episode The Mental Load and the Project Manager Wife cover

The Mental Load and the Project Manager Wife

"Just tell me what to do." Five words every married dad has said — and five words that drive your wife crazy. In this episode, Connor and Scott get honest about the gap between wanting to help and actually owning your household. Connor shares the early-marriage kitchen moment that exposed how differently he and Shay see "clean," and Scott opens up about the night Haley snapped while scrubbing dishes — not because he wouldn't help, but because she had to ask. Together they unpack why "just tell me what to do" puts your wife in the role of project manager instead of partner, the invisible tasks she's carrying that you haven't even noticed (pediatrician appointments, shoe sizes, clothing swaps, diaper inventory), and what it actually looks like to go from "helping out" to co-owning your home. Plus: Scott's practical tip on starting with the stuff you both need — meals, groceries, meal prep — and just taking it off her plate without being asked. Anchored in Philippians 2:3–4 and the call to count others as more significant than yourself, this one will make you want to audit your own week. Fair warning: you might not love what you find. Scripture Referenced: Philippians 2:3–4 · Ephesians 5:15–16 · Ephesians 5:25 Sunset Static Background Music License Music: Sunset Static by Joshua Moses https://joshuamosesmusic.bandcamp.com License: Creative Commons — Attribution 4.0 International — CC BY 4.0 Free Download / Stream: https://links.al/JmY Music promoted by Audio Library: https://links.al/youtube

24. maj 202620 min
episode The $300,000 Question cover

The $300,000 Question

It now costs over $300,000 to raise a child in America. Let that satisfying number sit for a second. In this episode, Connor and Pastor Scott tackle the financial pressure that keeps new dads up at night — sometimes even more than the baby does. They break down how to make that massive number feel manageable, the needs-versus-wants conversation most couples never actually have, and the real tension between working overtime to fill the savings account or clocking out to make it home for bath time. Connor gets honest about finances never being his strong suit and playing catch-up as a young father, while Scott shares what it looked like to trust God's provision when he and Shay had next to nothing as newlyweds. Anchored in Matthew 6:31-32, this episode walks the line between practical budgeting and genuine faith — because prayer without action is wishful thinking, and action without prayer is just stress with a spreadsheet. Scripture Referenced: Matthew 6:31-32 · James 2:26 · Hebrews 11:6 · Luke 12:15 Background Music: Sunset Static Background Music License Music: Sunset Static by Joshua Moses https://joshuamosesmusic.bandcamp.com License: Creative Commons — Attribution 4.0 International — CC BY 4.0 Free Download / Stream: https://links.al/JmY Music promoted by Audio Library: https://links.al/youtube

17. maj 202626 min
episode Surviving the 'Roommate Phase' in Marriage cover

Surviving the 'Roommate Phase' in Marriage

Two-thirds of couples say their relationship satisfaction tanks after having a baby. Two-thirds. So if you and your wife feel more like co-workers running a daycare than the people who fell in love — you're not broken, you're normal. But normal doesn't mean you stay there. In this episode, Connor and Pastor Scott get honest about the roommate phase that quietly takes over your marriage when a newborn moves in. Connor shares how a sermon on date nights exposed that every conversation had become about Beau, and Scott breaks down the Gottman Institute's four horsemen — contempt, criticism, defensiveness, and stonewalling — and why scorekeeping is the gateway to all of them. They talk love languages as a practical tool (not just a buzzword), the spiritual reality that the enemy either hates your marriage or has learned to love it, and why Ephesians 5:25 isn't a suggestion — it's marching orders. If you haven't had a real conversation with your wife in weeks, this is your sign. Scripture Referenced: Ephesians 5:25

16. maj 202636 min
episode The Identity Crisis No One Warns You About cover

The Identity Crisis No One Warns You About

No one satisfies you before the baby arrives and says, "Hey — the guy you've been for the last 25 years? He's gone now." But that's exactly what happens. In this episode, Connor and Pastor Scott get brutally honest about the identity crisis that hits the moment your child is born. Connor opens up about the guilt spiral of wanting just five more minutes alone in a parking lot, and Scott shares how the anxiety of "everything just changed" hit him on day one. Together they unpack why grieving your old life doesn't make you ungrateful, how to reframe fatherhood as your highest calling instead of your biggest loss, and the difference between godly conviction and toxic shame. Anchored in 2 Corinthians 5:17 and Christ's call to daily die to self, this is the conversation every new dad needs but no one is having with him. Scripture Referenced: 2 Corinthians 5:17 · 2 Corinthians 7:10 · Luke 9:23 · Luke 7:23

11. maj 202635 min
episode The Myth of the Perfect Dad cover

The Myth of the Perfect Dad

You're spending more time with your kids than your dad ever spent with you — and somehow the guilt is worse than ever. Connor and Pastor Scott tackle the myth of the perfect dad head-on: where it comes from, why social media is lying to you, and why your kids don't need a flawless father. They just need a present one. In this episode: * Why 57% of parents report burnout — and what's actually driving it (Ohio State University, 2024) * The science of "Dad Brain" — how fatherhood literally rewires your brain and why your role is irreplaceable * Why consistency beats intensity every single time * What it looks like to be a steady, predictable anchor in your kid's chaotic little world Anchor Verse: "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." — 2 Corinthians 12:9 The world will tell you you're not enough. God says your weakness is exactly where He shows up.

19. apr. 202634 min