Too Sober For This : Real Talk on Recovery, Life & Uncomfortable Conversations

Episode 10: Are We Making Hard Things Sound Too Soft? Language, Labels & Modern Offence

1 h 9 min · 19. maj 2026
episode Episode 10: Are We Making Hard Things Sound Too Soft? Language, Labels & Modern Offence cover

Beskrivelse

In this episode of Too Sober For This, Shell and Iain are talking about words: the ones we use, the ones we avoid, the ones that make us flinch, and the ones we maybe need to reclaim. From “alcoholic” and “addict” to “disabled”, “triggered”, “resilience”, “mindfulness”, “queer”, “c4nt” and “unalived”, this conversation gets into the messy, funny and uncomfortable reality of modern language. Who gets to decide which words are harmful? When does changing language help reduce stigma, and when does it just make things more sanitised, vague or algorithm-friendly? Shell and Iain also talk about the words they personally struggle with, the labels that have helped them understand themselves, and the ones that still feel loaded. There’s a lot in here about recovery, identity, diagnosis, online censorship, stigma, and why some words are uncomfortable for a reason. In this episode: *  Why some people identify with words like “addict” or “alcoholic” and others don’t  *  The difference between reclaiming language and being defined by it  *  How algorithms have changed the way we talk about suicide, abuse and trauma  *  Why sanitising difficult words can sometimes dilute serious conversations  *  The weaponisation of words like “resilience”, “triggered” and “mindfulness”  *  Diagnosis, self-identification, ADHD, autism, OCD and the problem with “everyone’s a little bit…”  *  Comedy, offence, intention and where the line actually is  *  Why language matters, but so does context, history and who is using it  As always, there are also sober w4nker wins, questionable emoji use, mango-eating dogs, chia seeds, family visits, cruise ship karaoke, and the ongoing evidence that sobriety does not automatically make you a calm, wholesome person! Listen now on all podcast platforms, and if this episode gets you thinking, send us your thoughts. What words do you hate? What labels have helped you? And are there any words you think we’ve become too scared to say? Follow, rate, review, share with a friend, send it to your group chat, or shout about it loudly in the street. All of it helps the algorithm believe we are more important than we currently are. Connect With Us @toosoberforthispodcast Shell Righini - @shell_righini  Iain Anderson - @iainanderson.comedy Traumedy Show - https://iainandersoncomedy.com/ Listen to Shell’s podcast We Recover Loudly here on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/24OFDBpIuItcOScVuGUDqg?si=a21c012d5123404c]   This Podcast Is Brought to You By We Recover Loudly Merch Bold recovery slogans and wearable reminders that recovery doesn’t have to be quiet. Shop here: www.werecoverloudly.com [http://www.werecoverloudly.com/] @werecoverloudly Mastered and edited by Unmuted Studios.  Podcast production, editing, and creative support. www.unmutedstudios.com

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11 episoder

episode Episode 11: Can Humour Heal You? Comedy, Creativity, Self-Worth & Recovery with Amelia Bayler cover

Episode 11: Can Humour Heal You? Comedy, Creativity, Self-Worth & Recovery with Amelia Bayler

In this episode of Too Sober For This, Shell and Iain are joined by comedian, musician and latex enthusiast Amelia Bayler for a conversation that starts with comedy and recovery… and somehow ends with dead hamsters, latex bodysuits, AI art, ice cream that looks suspiciously inappropriate, and arguing over who you’d save in a fire. We talk about what it actually looks like to build a life after drinking, when sobriety stops being your whole identity and starts becoming the thing that quietly gave you your life back. There’s loads in here about comedy, creativity, self-worth, body image, relationships, collaboration, mental health, and learning how to stop talking to yourself like your own worst enemy. Shell, Iain and Amelia also get into the overlap between humour and pain, using comedy as a defence mechanism, and the difference between laughing at yourself versus genuinely hurting yourself for other people’s entertainment. There’s also a big conversation around AI and creativity, whether art loses something when it’s generated instantly, and why collaboration and community matter so much in recovery and creative work. In this episode: • Why sobriety doesn't have to become your whole personality • Comedy, self-worth and making yourself the butt of the joke • Body image, confidence and learning to actually like yourself in recovery • AI art, ChatGPT and whether creativity loses meaning when everything is instant • Asking for help, collaboration and why recovery teaches people not to do life alone • Edinburgh Fringe chaos, comedy flyers and sweating inside latex • Relationships, identity and finding confidence without alcohol • The continuing debate over whether you save the dog or the human in a fire As always, there’s also sober overthinking, Glasgow stories, celebrity gossip, emotional support sausage dogs, questionable ice cream descriptions, burgers eaten in PVC outfits, and more proof that sobriety does not automatically turn you into a calm or sensible person. Listen now on all podcast platforms, and if this episode gets you thinking, send us your thoughts. Have you ever used humour as armour? Do you think AI can ever replace real creativity? And honestly… who are you saving in the fire? 🙌 Links to our guest Amelia Bayler DJ mix for Belters 4 U: https://on.soundcloud.com/kVoaYEuwbCXtKZi9Vf Live dates in EDI / LDN / GLA including EDI FRINGE ➡️ https://linktr.ee/ameliabayler PODCAST FUNNY LOOKS  https://open.spotify.com/show/7IwYaRzeuHk41Y4t7sVYGr?si=EKpKdED_SZGe0Tr-Spxf_A SOCIAL MEDIA LINKS Instagram: @ameliabayler  DJING INSTA:@gym_crush_93 Connect With Us @toosoberforthispodcast Shell Righini - @shell_righini  Iain Anderson - @iainanderson.comedy Traumedy Show - https://iainandersoncomedy.com/ Listen to Shell’s podcast We Recover Loudly here on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/24OFDBpIuItcOScVuGUDqg?si=a21c012d5123404c]   This Podcast Is Brought to You By We Recover Loudly Merch Bold recovery slogans and wearable reminders that recovery doesn’t have to be quiet. Shop here: www.werecoverloudly.com [http://www.werecoverloudly.com/] @werecoverloudly Mastered and edited by Unmuted Studios.  Podcast production, editing, and creative support. www.unmutedstudios.com

I går58 min
episode Episode 10: Are We Making Hard Things Sound Too Soft? Language, Labels & Modern Offence cover

Episode 10: Are We Making Hard Things Sound Too Soft? Language, Labels & Modern Offence

In this episode of Too Sober For This, Shell and Iain are talking about words: the ones we use, the ones we avoid, the ones that make us flinch, and the ones we maybe need to reclaim. From “alcoholic” and “addict” to “disabled”, “triggered”, “resilience”, “mindfulness”, “queer”, “c4nt” and “unalived”, this conversation gets into the messy, funny and uncomfortable reality of modern language. Who gets to decide which words are harmful? When does changing language help reduce stigma, and when does it just make things more sanitised, vague or algorithm-friendly? Shell and Iain also talk about the words they personally struggle with, the labels that have helped them understand themselves, and the ones that still feel loaded. There’s a lot in here about recovery, identity, diagnosis, online censorship, stigma, and why some words are uncomfortable for a reason. In this episode: *  Why some people identify with words like “addict” or “alcoholic” and others don’t  *  The difference between reclaiming language and being defined by it  *  How algorithms have changed the way we talk about suicide, abuse and trauma  *  Why sanitising difficult words can sometimes dilute serious conversations  *  The weaponisation of words like “resilience”, “triggered” and “mindfulness”  *  Diagnosis, self-identification, ADHD, autism, OCD and the problem with “everyone’s a little bit…”  *  Comedy, offence, intention and where the line actually is  *  Why language matters, but so does context, history and who is using it  As always, there are also sober w4nker wins, questionable emoji use, mango-eating dogs, chia seeds, family visits, cruise ship karaoke, and the ongoing evidence that sobriety does not automatically make you a calm, wholesome person! Listen now on all podcast platforms, and if this episode gets you thinking, send us your thoughts. What words do you hate? What labels have helped you? And are there any words you think we’ve become too scared to say? Follow, rate, review, share with a friend, send it to your group chat, or shout about it loudly in the street. All of it helps the algorithm believe we are more important than we currently are. Connect With Us @toosoberforthispodcast Shell Righini - @shell_righini  Iain Anderson - @iainanderson.comedy Traumedy Show - https://iainandersoncomedy.com/ Listen to Shell’s podcast We Recover Loudly here on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/24OFDBpIuItcOScVuGUDqg?si=a21c012d5123404c]   This Podcast Is Brought to You By We Recover Loudly Merch Bold recovery slogans and wearable reminders that recovery doesn’t have to be quiet. Shop here: www.werecoverloudly.com [http://www.werecoverloudly.com/] @werecoverloudly Mastered and edited by Unmuted Studios.  Podcast production, editing, and creative support. www.unmutedstudios.com

19. maj 20261 h 9 min
episode Episode 9: Dogs, Recovery & Mental Health - Would You Save The Dog First In A Fire?! cover

Episode 9: Dogs, Recovery & Mental Health - Would You Save The Dog First In A Fire?!

In this episode of Too Sober For This, recovery advocate Shell Righini and comedian Iain Anderson ask the question that nearly broke their friendship: If your house was on fire… are you saving the dog or the human first? What starts as a very unserious debate about dogs, humans, burning buildings and emotional support Chihuahuas turns into a much deeper conversation about pets, recovery, homelessness, mental health, loneliness, grief, and the kind of unconditional love that can sometimes save your life. Shell and Iain both share the stories of the animals who arrived in their lives at exactly the right time. Shell talks about Ralph the cat, Milo the dog, and how having something to care for helped her through some of the darkest parts of early recovery. Iain shares how he found Rascal as an abandoned puppy in Barcelona, how they stayed together through homelessness, and why he feels so strongly about the way society often shows more compassion for animals on the street than for the humans beside them. There is also a very serious discussion about non-alcoholic Guinness, supermarket pizzas, Isle of Wight tomatoes, dogs with better social lives than their owners, and whether Milo is actually a dog… or a lifestyle. In this episode: *  How pets can support mental health, routine and emotional regulation  *  The role animals can play in early sobriety and recovery  *  Why caring for something else can help pull us out of ourselves  *  The guilt, fear and codependency that can come with pet ownership  *  Homelessness, dogs, shelters and judgement  *  Why people are often more outraged by animals on the street than humans  *  Whether dogs really offer unconditional love  *  The grief we anticipate when we love an animal deeply  *  Listener responses to the ultimate question: dog or human?  This one is funny, chaotic, emotional and unexpectedly uncomfortable in the best way. It is about dogs, yes. But it is also about compassion, survival, connection, and what it really means to love something that cannot stay forever. As always, if you enjoy the episode, please follow, rate, review, share it with a friend, send it to the dog person in your life, and help us keep pleasing the algorithm lords. Connect With Us @toosoberforthispodcast Shell Righini - @shell_righini  Iain Anderson - @iainanderson.comedy Traumedy Show - https://iainandersoncomedy.com/ Listen to Shell’s podcast We Recover Loudly here on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/24OFDBpIuItcOScVuGUDqg?si=a21c012d5123404c]   This Podcast Is Brought to You By We Recover Loudly Merch Bold recovery slogans and wearable reminders that recovery doesn’t have to be quiet. Shop here: www.werecoverloudly.com [http://www.werecoverloudly.com/] @werecoverloudly Mastered and edited by Unmuted Studios.  Podcast production, editing, and creative support. www.unmutedstudios.com

12. maj 20261 h 6 min
episode Episode 8: Why Does Body Image Feel Worse Than Ever? Social Media, Comparison & Self-Worth cover

Episode 8: Why Does Body Image Feel Worse Than Ever? Social Media, Comparison & Self-Worth

In this episode of Too Sober For This, recovery advocate Shell Righini and comedian Iain Anderson discuss… What does it actually mean to feel “good” in your body… and why is it still so hard? From 90s diet culture to Instagram “looksmaxxing,” body image has evolved… but the pressure hasn’t gone anywhere. If anything, it’s louder, more constant, and now coming from every direction. Shell and Iain explore what it’s like navigating body image in sobriety; when you can’t numb out, distract, or escape the way you used to. They talk about growing up around dieting, disordered eating, and unrealistic standards, and how those patterns don’t just disappear when you get sober. They also get into the newer wave of body pressure online, from men literally trying to “fix” their faces with hammers to the rise of optimisation culture, and ask whether any of it is actually about confidence… or just another form of self-rejection.  Because the truth is you can change your habits, your lifestyle, even your entire life... and still wake up feeling uncomfortable in your own skin. In this episode: • Body image in recovery: what changes… and what doesn’t • Growing up in 90s/2000s diet culture and its long-term impact • Disordered eating, control, and addiction crossover • Looksmaxxing, social media, and modern beauty standards • Masculinity, appearance, and pressure on men • Fitness, health, and finding a middle ground • Chronic illness, identity, and feeling disconnected from your body • The “inner critic” and why it’s so hard to switch off • Self-worth, comparison, and learning to exist without constant judgement If you’ve ever felt like your relationship with your body is complicated, exhausting, or constantly shifting then this episode will probably hit. Expect honesty, uncomfortable self-awareness, dark humour, and a conversation that doesn’t pretend to have a neat answer. Connect With Us @toosoberforthispodcast Shell Righini - @shell_righini  Iain Anderson - @iainanderson.comedy Traumedy Show - https://iainandersoncomedy.com/ Listen to Shell’s podcast We Recover Loudly here on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/24OFDBpIuItcOScVuGUDqg?si=a21c012d5123404c]   This Podcast Is Brought to You By We Recover Loudly Merch Bold recovery slogans and wearable reminders that recovery doesn’t have to be quiet. Shop here: www.werecoverloudly.com [http://www.werecoverloudly.com/] @werecoverloudly Mastered and edited by Unmuted Studios.  Podcast production, editing, and creative support. www.unmutedstudios.com

5. maj 20261 h 11 min
episode Episode 7: What Happens After You Quit Drinking? Mental Health, Personal Growth & Modern Masculinity with Ben Gibbs aka Sober Boozer cover

Episode 7: What Happens After You Quit Drinking? Mental Health, Personal Growth & Modern Masculinity with Ben Gibbs aka Sober Boozer

In this episode of Too Sober For This, recovery advocate Shell Righini and comedian Iain Anderson are joined by sobriety advocate, beer expert, and Instagram's Sober Boozer, Ben Gibbs to discuss...   What actually changes when you quit drinking… and what doesn’t?  From alcohol-free beer to sober Instagram, recovery has never been more visible. People are building communities, sharing journeys online, and redefining what life without alcohol looks like. But is sobriety really the solution to everything… or just the starting point?  Shell, Iain and Ben explore the reality of getting sober in 2026. They talk about mental health, relationships, personal growth, masculinity, and the unexpected parts of recovery that no one really prepares you for. From building a life online to navigating real-world connection, this conversation goes far beyond just “not drinking.”  They get into what sobriety gives you, what it takes away, and why putting down the drink doesn’t automatically make you a better person.  This episode sits right in the tension between self-improvement and self-awareness, questioning what happens when the coping mechanism disappears and you’re left with… just yourself.   In this episode  • Life after alcohol: what actually changes (and what doesn’t)  • Ben Gibbs’ journey and building The Sober Boozer  • Alcohol-free beer, sober culture, and social life without drinking  • Relationships, breakups, and identity in sobriety  • Money, addiction, and shifting from chaos to stability  • Online sobriety vs real-life community  • Masculinity, the manosphere, and modern male identity  • Why sobriety doesn’t automatically fix your behaviour  • Boundaries, choice, and learning how to leave when you want to   If you’ve ever wondered what life really looks like after quitting alcohol, this episode will give you the honest version… not the Instagram one.  Expect sharp observations, uncomfortable truths, dark humour, and a few moments where you realise sobriety isn’t about becoming perfect… and that is ok!  👤 About our guest: Ben Gibbs  Ben Gibbs, also known as The Sober Boozer, has been a beer commentator and sobriety advocate since quitting alcohol in 2022. He’s sampled over 1000 alcohol-free beers, worked with breweries across the UK, appeared on BBC radio, and became the first person in recovery to win a British Guild of Beer Writers award for his work.  👉 Follow Ben:  Instagram: @ sober_boozers_club [https://www.instagram.com/sober_boozers_club/#]  Monthly beer subscription box click here [https://thealcoholfreeco.co.uk/collections/sober-boozers-club?srsltid=AfmBOoqHNATrqbuXtDhWJFdv49mduSIDA43GQQePu9-rWtJPwCNS-t9D] Connect With Us @toosoberforthispodcast Shell Righini - @shell_righini  Iain Anderson - @iainanderson.comedy Traumedy Show - https://iainandersoncomedy.com/ Listen to Shell’s podcast We Recover Loudly here on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/24OFDBpIuItcOScVuGUDqg?si=a21c012d5123404c]   This Podcast Is Brought to You By We Recover Loudly Merch Bold recovery slogans and wearable reminders that recovery doesn’t have to be quiet. Shop here: www.werecoverloudly.com [http://www.werecoverloudly.com/] @werecoverloudly Mastered and edited by Unmuted Studios.  Podcast production, editing, and creative support. www.unmutedstudios.com

21. apr. 20261 h 14 min