When You Feel Numb, Broken and Out of Options: Emotional Shutdown, Affairs and Where to Start

When You Feel Numb, Broken and Out of Options: Emotional Shutdown, Affairs and Where to Start

📻 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙈𝙖𝙣’𝙨 𝘽𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩 – 𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝟐𝟑 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐍𝐨𝐓𝐄𝐒In this QA episode, JJ West and Doug Barnes respond to two deeply honest letters. “Terry” has been sober for five and a half years after porn and betrayal but feels emotionally numb, unable to cry over major losses or show his wife the empathy she deserves. Another listener shares that after an affair and a recent “almost slip,” his partner is done, and he’s promised to change but doesn’t know where to start.You’ll learn:Why emotional shutdown is often a survival strategy rooted in trauma and loss, not proof that you’re inhuman or beyond hope—and how trauma‑informed counseling and simple emotional awareness practices can help thaw the numbness.Why “almost affairs” are still heart‑level betrayals, why big promises aren’t enough, and how real change begins with awareness, ownership, and examining what made you open to temptation in the first place.How New Life’s workshops, counseling, and groups can support men and their wives as they move from mere sobriety into deeper healing, empathy, and relational repair.🎟 Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 to save $100 when you register for the Every Man’s Battle Intensive, and ask about Restore for wives and ongoing recovery groups so you’re not walking this road alone.📧 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒Want extra content to encourage your integrity, delivered via email each month? 👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Bonus Content” in the subject line.To send your own questions for future QA shows:👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Podcast Question” in the subject line.☎️ Need more than a podcast—counseling, workshops, or groups?👉 Call 800‑NEW‑LIFE or visit NewLife.com to connect with:Sexual integrity counseling for men.Every Man’s Battle intensives.Restore workshops for wives.Ongoing recovery and Life Recovery groups.🎟 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐏𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐃𝐄If you resonate with Terry’s numbness or the anonymous oil‑field worker’s fear of losing his relationship, consider:Every Man’s Battle IntensiveA 3‑day workshop for men seeking freedom from porn, affairs, and sexual addiction, led by licensed Christian counselors.Helps you understand not only your behavior but also the deeper story and emotions behind it.Restore Intensive (for wives)A 3‑day workshop for women affected by betrayal, affairs, and pornography, offering tools and community for betrayal trauma recovery.Join a recovery groupNew Life offers online and in‑person groups for sexual integrity, addiction recovery, and Life Recovery to provide long‑term support as you work through numbness, triggers, and relational repair.Scholarships are often available; ask about them when you call 800‑NEW‑LIFE.Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 when you register for Every Man’s Battle to save $100 on your registration.🎧 Listen subscribe:👉 Every Man’s Battle Podcast hub: https://newlife.com/podcasts/every-mans-battle/👉 New Life LIVE other New Life podcasts: https://newlife.com/podcasts/#EveryMansBattle #EmotionalNumbness #AffairsAndRecovery #SexualIntegrity #BetrayalTrauma #NewLifeMinistries

You Can’t Do This Alone: Bob Sklar on Good Accountability, Story Work, and Becoming Safe

📻 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙈𝙖𝙣’𝙨 𝘽𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩 – 𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝟐𝟐 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐍𝐨𝐓𝐄𝐒In this episode, JJ West, Doug Barnes, and facilitator Bob Sklar explain why Sustained Victory—New Life’s aftercare program for Every Man’s Battle alumni—is essential for moving from short‑term sobriety to long‑term recovery. They describe how weekly, counselor‑led groups become a laboratory for connection, where men learn real accountability, practice “into‑me‑see,” and respond to triggers by reaching out to brothers instead of running back to porn.You’ll learn:How to treat temptations and emotional “storms” as dashboard warning lights, not signals to numb out, and why healing must happen in community with safe men, not in isolation.What separates good accountability (rigorous honesty, story‑based challenge, truth in love) from shallow “How you doing?” check‑ins that let you hide and blame your spouse.Why sobriety alone isn’t enough—and how groups like Sustained Victory help you become a safe, present husband and father, not just a man who stopped viewing porn.🎟 Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 to save $100 when you register for the Every Man’s Battle Intensive, and ask about Sustained Victory and other New Life recovery groups so you’re not fighting this battle alone.📧 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒Want extra content to encourage your integrity, delivered via email each month? 👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Bonus Content” in the subject line.To share comments, questions, or topic ideas for upcoming episodes:👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Podcast Question” in the subject line.☎️ Need help deciding your next step—workshop, Sustained Victory group, or counseling?👉 Call 800‑NEW‑LIFE or visit NewLife.com for faith‑based sexual integrity counseling, workshops, and recovery groups.🎟 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐍’𝐒 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘 – 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐇 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐃If this episode has exposed how much you need ongoing brotherhood and structured accountability, consider these steps:Attend the Every Man’s Battle IntensiveA 3‑day, in‑person workshop led by licensed Christian counselors.Teaching, story work, and practical tools for sexual integrity and heart‑level change.A brotherhood of men who understand your struggle and want the same freedom.Join a Sustained Victory group after EMBWeekly, counselor‑led groups (online) that help you live out what you learned at the intensive.Guided discussions, real accountability, and support for deeper healing and resilience.New Life also offers additional recovery groups (Men’s Life Recovery, Men’s Accountability, Life Recovery Support) for broader issues like substance abuse, codependency, and emotional strongholds. All are structured, faith‑aligned communities focused on healing in relationship.💵 Concerned about cost? New Life offers scholarships, because finances shouldn’t be the reason you stay stuck. When you call 800‑NEW‑LIFE, ask about assistance for both Every Man’s Battle and Sustained Victory.Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 when you register to save $100 on your Every Man’s Battle registration.🎧 Discover more ways to listen watch:👉 Every Man’s Battle Podcast hub: https://newlife.com/podcasts/every-mans-battle/👉 New Life LIVE other New Life podcasts: https://newlife.com/podcasts/#EveryMansBattle #SustainedVictory #SexualIntegrity #Accountability #ConnectionNotIsolation #NewLifeMinistries

“My Addiction Was a Terrorist”: How Bob Sklar Found Real Recovery, Not Just Sobriety

📻 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙈𝙖𝙣’𝙨 𝘽𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩 – 𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝟐𝟏 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐍𝐨𝐓𝐄𝐒In this powerful facilitator spotlight, JJ West and Doug Barnes sit down with Bob Sklar, one of the original Every Man’s Battle facilitators. Bob shares a 36‑year recovery journey that includes childhood sexual abuse, early pornography exposure, a porn‑shaped view of sex, coming to Christ at 18, harmful church advice, multiple relapses, and finally discovering the missing piece: connection with God, self, and others through Every Man’s Battle and Sustained Victory.You’ll hear:How abuse, secrecy, and moving every three years formed emotional “templates” of not belonging, driving Bob to porn to “thermostat” his feelings and escape reality.Why negotiating with addiction (“I’ll just look once…”) is like bargaining with a terrorist, and how poor disclosure and “work your own side of the street” thinking delayed his wife’s healing.How EMB and deep friendships with other facilitators taught him rigorous honesty, emotional language, and authentic connection, leading him to say, “I didn’t just get sobriety; I got a life.”🎟 Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 to save $100 when you register for the Every Man’s Battle Intensive, and ask about Sustained Victory and online recovery groups so you’re not fighting this battle alone.📧 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒Want extra content to encourage your integrity, delivered via email each month? 👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Bonus Content” in the subject line to receive exclusive Every Man’s Battle Podcast resources.To send your questions, feedback, or topic ideas for upcoming QA episodes:👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Podcast Question” in the subject line.☎️ Need more help—counseling, groups, or a structured plan after this episode stirred things up?👉 Call 800‑NEW‑LIFE or visit NewLife.com to connect with Christian sexual integrity counseling, workshops, and recovery groups.🎟 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐑 – 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐍’𝐒 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐃 𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘If Bob’s story feels uncomfortably familiar—decades of white‑knuckling, partial disclosure, relapse, and secret negotiation with your addiction—it may be time to stop managing and start truly recovering. The Every Man’s Battle Intensive is a 3‑day, Christ‑centered workshop where:Licensed Christian counselors teach biblically grounded, clinically informed material on sexual integrity.You participate in small‑group sessions led by trained facilitators like Bob, JJ, and Doug.You experience real connection with men who share your struggle and want the same freedom.After the workshop, New Life’s Sustained Victory and other Every Man’s Battle groups (online and in person) offer weekly community so you don’t go back to isolation. They help men continue to build connection with God, self, and others—the very missing piece Bob describes as revolutionary for his recovery.💵 Concerned about cost? Scholarships are often available so finances don’t have to keep you out of the battle. When you call 800‑NEW‑LIFE, ask about assistance for Every Man’s Battle and Sustained Victory.Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 when you register to save $100 on your Every Man’s Battle registration.🎧 Discover more ways to listen watch:👉 Every Man’s Battle Podcast hub: https://newlife.com/podcasts/every-mans-battle/👉 New Life LIVE other New Life podcasts: https://newlife.com/podcasts/#EveryMansBattle #SexualIntegrity #PornRecovery #ChildhoodAbuse #Disclosure #SustainedVictory #NewLifeMinistries

Beyond Guardrails: Healing Desire and Using Tech for Connection, Not Escape

📻 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙈𝙖𝙣’𝙨 𝘽𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩 – 𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝟐𝟎 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐍𝐨𝐓𝐄𝐒 (Short)In Part 3 of their “Using Tech Safely in Recovery” series, licensed counselors JJ West and Doug Barnes move beyond filters and guardrails to the heart beneath your screen habits. They explain why the real battle is about desire, story, and community, not just discipline, and how authentic brotherhood helps heal the wounds that drive you to your phone or laptop in the first place.You’ll learn:Why technology is a tool, not the enemy, and how misusing it reveals deeper longings for comfort, connection, and validation.How to build a brotherhood that uses phones and apps for check‑ins, SOS calls, and support, rather than for hiding and fantasy.What it means to consecrate your devices—offering them to God as tools for healing, discipleship, and connection—and to do the story work needed so your tech habits align with the man God is calling you to be.🎟 Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 to save $100 when you register for the Every Man’s Battle Intensive, and ask about Sustained Victory and online groups that help you live with integrity in a digital world.📧 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒Want extra content to encourage your integrity, delivered via email each month? 👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Bonus Content” in the subject line to receive exclusive Every Man’s Battle Podcast resources.To send your questions, feedback, or topic ideas for upcoming QA episodes:👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Podcast Question” in the subject line.☎️ Need a counselor, group, or structured plan to help you do the deeper heart work?👉 Call 800‑NEW‑LIFE or visit NewLife.com for faith‑based sexual integrity counseling, workshops, and recovery groups.🎟 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐑 – 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐍’𝐒 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐏𝐒If this series has exposed how deeply your tech use is tied to unhealed desire and isolation, the Every Man’s Battle Intensive is a strategic next step. This 3‑day workshop is a safe, shame‑free zone where licensed Christian counselors help you:Bring hidden struggles into the light.Understand the root causes of compulsive behavior.Connect with men facing similar battles.Build a path toward lasting integrity in a tech‑saturated world.After the intensive, New Life’s Sustained Victory and other Every Man’s Battle groups provide weekly, online community so you don’t have to walk this out alone. These groups combine professional guidance with peer support to address the psychological and spiritual dimensions of healing in community.💵 Worried about cost? Scholarships are available so finances don’t have to stand between you and the help you need. When you call 800‑NEW‑LIFE, ask about assistance for Every Man’s Battle and related groups.Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 when you register to save $100 on your Every Man’s Battle tuition.🎧 Discover more ways to listen watch:👉 Every Man’s Battle Podcast hub: https://newlife.com/podcasts/every-mans-battle/👉 New Life LIVE other New Life podcasts: https://newlife.com/podcasts/#EveryMansBattle #SexualIntegrity #TechnologyAndRecovery #DesireNotJustDiscipline #ConsecratedDevices #NewLifeMinistries

Safely Using Technology in Recovery, Part 2: Guardrails, Habits, and Handheld Sabbaths

📻 𝙀𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙮 𝙈𝙖𝙣’𝙨 𝘽𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙨𝙩 – 𝐄𝐩𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐝𝐞 𝟏𝟗 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐍𝐨tesIn Part 2 of their series on safely using technology in recovery, licensed counselors JJ West and Doug Barnes move from big‑picture concepts to practical guardrails for your phones, computers, and apps. They show how to combine device transparency, filters, access‑point removal, screen‑time limits, and handheld Sabbaths with deeper heart work so that technology supports your recovery instead of sabotaging it.You’ll learn:Why device transparency (no secret devices or codes) and active accountability are freeing, not controlling.How filters, parental controls, and disabling private browsing act as speed bumps and check‑engine lights, slowing you down long enough to ask, “What am I really seeking right now?”Why simply restricting screen time isn’t enough, and how to replace unhealthy tech habits with prayer, journaling, exercise, and connection so you become the kind of man God is calling you to be.🎟 Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 to save $100 when you register for the Every Man’s Battle Intensive, and ask about scholarships and recovery groups that help you live with integrity in a digital world.📧 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐅𝐎R EMAIL 𝐒𝐔𝐁𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐁𝐄𝐑𝐒Want extra content to encourage your integrity, delivered via email each month? 👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Bonus Content” in the subject line to receive exclusive Every Man’s Battle Podcast resources. To send questions or suggest future topics (including specific tech tools or scenarios you’d like addressed):👉 Email EMBpodcast@newlife.com with “Podcast Question” in the subject line.☎️ Need help beyond the podcast—counseling, groups, or a structured recovery plan?👉 Call 800‑NEW‑LIFE or visit NewLife.com for Christian counseling, workshops, and recovery groups that go beyond behavior management to heart‑level change.🎟 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐎𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐑 – 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐍’𝐒 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄𝐍’𝐒 𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐏𝐒If you’re realizing that your tech habits keep pulling you back into old patterns, it may be time to get help beyond filters and willpower. The Every Man’s Battle Intensive is a 3‑day, Christ‑centered workshop where experienced counselors help you:Identify root causes and triggers.Understand behavior change vs. heart change.Build a realistic plan for sexual integrity in a tech‑saturated world.After the intensive, you can join Every Man’s Battle groups, Men’s Sexual Integrity groups, and other New Life recovery meetings (online and in person) so you’re not trying to do this alone.💵 Concerned about cost? New Life offers scholarships, because they don’t want finances to be the barrier to your healing. When you call 800‑NEW‑LIFE, ask about assistance for the Every Man’s Battle Intensive and related groups.Use code 𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐏𝐎𝐃 when you register to save $100 on your Every Man’s Battle tuition.🎧 Discover more ways to listen watch:👉 Every Man’s Battle Podcast hub: https://newlife.com/podcasts/every-mans-battle/👉 New Life LIVE other New Life podcasts: https://newlife.com/podcasts/#EveryMansBattle #SexualIntegrity #TechnologyAndRecovery #FiltersAndFreedom #GuardrailsNotGuilt #NewLifeMinistries