Ep. 248: Dating, Ghosting & Found Family: A Girl and a Gay on Real Modern Love

Ep. 248: Dating, Ghosting & Found Family: A Girl and a Gay on Real Modern Love

Jacqueline & Japheth | A Girl and a Gay What happens when a metropolitan girly from New York and LA meets a Nashville-born gay man at a summer party — and they become instant best friends? Magic. Content. And a whole lot of tea. Zach sits down with Jacqueline and Japheth, the creators behind the TikTok account A Girl and a Gay, for one of the most wide-ranging, real-talk conversations the show has had in a while. These two met just a year ago through a mutual friend, and they've already built a growing platform giving dating advice to thousands of followers — from real DMs about heartbreak, ghosting, and whether a guy actually likes you. In this episode: * How Jacqueline and Japheth met at a Nashville party and became instant best friends (what Japheth calls a "clandestine union of sorts") * Jacqueline's move from New York and LA to Nashville — and why she traded city life for something more peaceful * What the gay dating scene in Nashville is actually like: close-knit, warm, but also complicated when everyone knows everyone * Ghosting, catfishing, and love bombing — why ghosting may be more psychologically damaging than outright rejection * How to make friends as an adult (including Zach's Out Close dinner experience in Boston) * Being gay in a red state: Japheth's experience growing up out in Tennessee and why he cries every year at Nashville Pride * The origin of A Girl and a Gay — how a single TikTok video blew up and turned into a movement * Why their DMs started filling up with real relationship questions when they still had under 1,000 followers * Skincare secrets (shoutout to Revision Skincare and IT Cosmetics CC cream) * And the conversation every aspiring podcaster needs to hear about patience, persistence, and not going in with expectations Connect with Jacqueline & Japheth: * TikTok: @agirlAndAGay (combined account) https://www.tiktok.com/@a.girl.and.a.gay [https://www.tiktok.com/@a.girl.and.a.gay] * Plus their individual TikTok and Instagram accounts —   * https://www.tiktok.com/@japhethfranco [https://www.tiktok.com/@japhethfranco] * https://www.tiktok.com/@itsjacqs [https://www.tiktok.com/@itsjacqs] * https://www.instagram.com/japheth__franco/ [https://www.instagram.com/japheth__franco/] Everything & Anything…and a Bit Gay is hosted by Zach Randles-Friedman. New episodes drop regularly. Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who needs it. Podcast song by SIXFOOT 5: https://www.sixfoot5prod.com [https://www.sixfoot5prod.com]  Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977  [https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977 ] Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ [https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ] Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com [https://pcm.adswizz.com] for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ep. 247: This Is Everything: Gay Men, Aging & the Skin Obsession Nobody Talks About

Episode Notes: Let's be real — the gay community has a complicated relationship with age. And Zach is done pretending otherwise. In this episode of This Is Everything, Zach reflects on the journey every gay man eventually takes: from the invincible 20-something who thought 35 was ancient, to the 53-year-old still showing up, still looking good, and still absolutely judging the 21-year-olds walking in like they own the place. In this episode, Zach covers: * Growing up in Miami and living his best twink life in South Beach going out six or seven nights a week * The exact moment in his 30s at Wonder Bar in New York City when it hit him — oh shit, I'm not the young one anymore * The infamous "old troll" comment he and his friend Tony made on the dance floor at Amnesia — and how karma came for both of them * Why gay men aging feels a lot more like straight women aging than straight men aging * His full skincare arsenal: Botox, microneedling, salmon sperm facials, and his newest obsession — Plated Skin Science, a serum powered by over one trillion platelet-derived exosomes developed by Mayo Clinic physician-scientists * Why he'll never do fillers (except for the lips, which doesn't count, apparently) * Dressing your age without looking like you've given up — and why he gave his oversized sweaters to his husband * The unexpected upside of being 53 in the age of AI About Plated Skin Science: Zach just started using the Plated INTENSE Serum and EYE Serum. Plated is the #1 dermatologist-recommended exosome brand, developed through 20+ years of Mayo Clinic research. The INTENSE Serum contains over 1 trillion platelet-derived exosomes per bottle and is clinically proven to reduce the appearance of fine lines, wrinkles, dark spots, and uneven tone. Time Magazine named it one of the Best Inventions of 2024. Learn more at platedskinscience.com [https://platedskinscience.com].  💬 Have your own "holy shit I'm getting older" gay bar moment? Tell Zach about it. 📩 DM on Instagram or drop a comment.https://www.instagram.com/therealzachre/ [https://www.instagram.com/therealzachre/] 🎙️ Everything & Anything…and a Bit Gay drops new episodes five days a week. Subscribe, rate, and review wherever you listen — it genuinely helps more than you know.   Podcast song by SIXFOOT 5: https://www.sixfoot5prod.com [https://www.sixfoot5prod.com]  Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977  [https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977 ] Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ [https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ] Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com [https://pcm.adswizz.com] for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ep. 246: Billboard-Charting Musical Theater Writer Billy Recce on Big Man & Queer Storytelling

Everything & Anything…and a Bit Gay Episode: Billboard-Charting Musical Theater Composer Billy Recce Billy Recce is a queer composer, lyricist, and songwriter whose work spans Broadway development, off-Broadway productions, pop, and cabaret. He's a two-time MAC Award winner, Jonathan Larson Grant finalist, and William Finn Award winner — and his songs have been performed by Bernadette Peters, Mandy Patinkin, Tituss Burgess, and Rachel Dratch, among others. In this episode, Zach and Billy cover: * How Billy started writing musicals in spiral notebooks during third-grade math class and got his first major production as the youngest writer in the NY Musical Theater Festival with Balloon Boy * His new single "Wanted to Believe" from Big Man — an original musical about Alzheimer's, dementia caregiving, and a character whose condition leads him to believe he's close friends with the Rat Pack. The single is performed by Tony nominee Ramin Karimloo and 100% of proceeds benefit the Alzheimer's Association (alz.org) * Foul Play — a queer musical comedy about two theater writers hired to create an apology musical for Chick-fil-A, exploring rainbow capitalism and queer identity, directed by Ty Defoe (Titanic) * Little Black Book — Billy's one-woman musical about Heidi Fleiss living in the Nevada desert with 40 parrots, starring Broadway's Orfe, developed through a 2021 concept album and now heading toward a new production * What it actually takes to develop a musical — the seven-year journey, packaging, concept albums as momentum-builders, and keeping 18 projects in the fire at once * His long-term vision: queering the musical theater canon and telling stories across theater, film, and TV * Advice for young queer artists: get your work out, cold email everyone, find your performers, and use every platform available * His annual collaboration with P-Town drag performer Paige Turner, writing original songs for her yearly show at the Post Office Café Listen to "Wanted to Believe" https://open.spotify.com/track/0BvwefSfeKbHvBVtV8YNbP [https://open.spotify.com/track/0BvwefSfeKbHvBVtV8YNbP] on all streaming and digital platforms — and stream it knowing your listen supports the Alzheimer's Association.  Follow Billy: * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thebillyrecce/ [https://www.instagram.com/thebillyrecce/] * Website: https://www.billyrecce.com/ [https://www.billyrecce.com/] Everything & Anything…and a Bit Gay is hosted by Zach Randles-Friedman. If this episode resonated with you, share it — and share Billy's single. Subscribe, rate, and review wherever you listen.     Podcast song by SIXFOOT 5: https://www.sixfoot5prod.com [https://www.sixfoot5prod.com]  Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977  [https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977 ] Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ [https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ] Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com [https://pcm.adswizz.com] for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ep. 245: Coming Out at 52, Mean Gays, and Why I'm Done Reading Comments

Episode Notes: * David's coming-out episode remains one of the most talked-about on the show — and it's still changing lives. David came out to his family at 52 and hasn't looked back. * Sherry, one of Andrew's lifelong friends from Long Island, calls herself "the queen of gays" and is fully here for David living his truth. So is Kim. The whole crew showed up for him. * David is now dating someone with deep roots in Boston's gay social scene, which has opened up a whole new world for him — but it also highlighted something real: when you come out later in life, you missed decades of gay bar culture, queer friendships, and community, and navigating that for the first time at 52 is its own experience. * Zach's Club Cafe history is legendary. The $250 Uber ride home after one particularly chaotic night — including a very unfortunate moment on Route 90 West — is a tale for the ages. * The throuple breakup outside the bar, and the guy's absolute audacity to seek comfort from Zach minutes after being cold to him inside, is a masterclass in what not to do. * Zach's podcast advisor gave him a note this week: stop reading comments. Stop clapping back in public. The show is growing, people are recognizing him, and one clip out of context can become a whole thing. Zach is working on it. * He will, however, always step in when someone posts something harmful about a guest from a marginalized community. That line doesn't move. * Provincetown update: Crown & Anchor has been sold and redone. Governor Bradford's situation is still evolving. Lots of change happening in P-Town. Zach is going in August for a short stay and is now actually excited about it. * If you've never been to Provincetown and you're part of the LGBTQ+ community — go. Budget accordingly. Tea dance alone is worth it The Gay Bit drops every Friday on Everything & Anything…and a Bit Gay. New guest episode Sunday. Podcast song by SIXFOOT 5: https://www.sixfoot5prod.com [https://www.sixfoot5prod.com]  Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977  [https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977 ] Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ [https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ] Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com [https://pcm.adswizz.com] for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Ep. 244: Sex Therapist Dr. Lee Phillips on Open Relationships, Comedy & Gay Dating

Dr. Lee Phillips has built a wildly unique career sitting at the intersection of clinical expertise and comedy. With a doctorate in psychology, a master's in social work, and a growing social media following fueled by his razor-sharp takes on gay dating and public confrontations, Dr. Lee is a voice the LGBTQ+ community didn't know it needed — until now. In this episode, Zach and Dr. Lee cover: * How Dr. Lee went from a kid in Chesapeake, Virginia dreaming of Broadway to becoming a licensed sex therapist and viral comedian in New York City * What ethical non-monogamy (ENM) actually means — and the very real jealousy that can hit even a therapist when his husband downloads Scruff first * Why some couples thrive in open relationships while others absolutely do not — and the red flags to watch for * The "intimacy desire paradox" and the sweatpants phase: what happens to desire in long-term relationships and how couples can reclaim their erotic connection * Why Somerville, Massachusetts is apparently the polyamory capital of the United States (Zach has receipts) * The viral coffee shop reel that got 1.3 million views, caught the attention of A-list celebrities, and launched Dr. Lee's comedy career * Boston gays vs. New York gays vs. DC gays — an honest, hilarious breakdown * What it felt like to be recognized in a restaurant and a gym locker room for cursing someone out on camera * Two books in the works: an academic text on sex, disability, and chronic illness — and Queering Desire, a comedy-infused guide to queer sex, dating, and relationships * The comedians Dr. Lee admires most (Matteo Lane and Jessie Kersen get major shoutouts) * Salmon sperm microneedling, skincare obsessions, and why Dr. Lee's husband is now going through their face soap "like crazy" Whether you're in a monogamous relationship, an open one, or somewhere in between, this conversation will make you laugh, think, and probably text your partner something interesting. Follow Dr. Lee Phillips: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drleephillips/ [https://www.instagram.com/drleephillips/] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drleephillips5 [https://www.tiktok.com/@drleephillips5] Greenwich Village Comedy Club Pride Show: June 24 — https://www.greenwichvillagecomedyclub.com/ [https://www.greenwichvillagecomedyclub.com/] Podcast song by SIXFOOT 5: https://www.sixfoot5prod.com [https://www.sixfoot5prod.com]  Apple: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977  [https://music.apple.com/us/artist/sixfoot-5/1551774977 ] Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ [https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rHMzoU0G0fLhaBsrQiOOY?si=laSZ5hiKTYubJJyhrzf2JQ] Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com [https://pcm.adswizz.com] for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.