Let's Talk Kids

Under the file marked “My Family’s Quirks” is the knowledge that granddaughter Joslin has a rough time saying goodbye. She loves her family and friends with such fervor that whenever it’s time for her to part from any of them, she struggles with her own bereft sorrow. Knowing this, we plan ahead to be sure we give her time for her farewells, offering up our own with calm reassurance and understanding. Joslin may have come by this trait honestly, because I also have a hard time with goodbyes,

The Walters family has two sons, aged four and seven. These sweet boys look so much alike that I do a double take each time I see them. Their mom dresses them in matching outfits for holiday photos, and their parents hear a constant litany of how much they resemble each other. But appearance is where the resemblance ends. Having gotten to know these two children, I can tell you that their personalities are nothing alike. Geoff, the elder, is quiet and studious. He’s a rule follower and a bit of

Most expectant parents imagine they will be completely different parents than the ones who raised them. And then somehow, in the months following the births of their babies, words come out of their own mouths that they remember hearing a generation ago. Our past is inescapable, it seems, when it comes to raising our children. This is great news for grandparents who feel somehow affirmed by the perpetuation of their methods and values. But perhaps the most delicious aspect of all is watching our

This one is for every adult who’s watched in frustration as a parent or child struggled in some way. Perhaps you’re a caring neighbor who sees the single parent next door work two jobs in order to provide for her kids. Maybe you’re a grandparent who can’t stand to watch a grandchild try again and again to get the right piece in the jigsaw puzzle. Or you might be a friend who sees a parent at his wit’s end figuring out how to support a child’s more peaceful behavior. If you ever find yourself a

Every pair of parents has a subtle competition going on most of the time. Even when they’re deeply committed to each other, daily life with a family provides no shortage of space for skirmishes. There’s a natural “gatekeeping” related to parents’ devotion to their child. Each parent believes he or she knows best on some issue of childrearing, which often results in disagreement. Mom thinks sugar should be restricted, and Dad thinks she’s being silly. Dad has no tolerance for sass, and Mom thinks