Perennial Pen (What Matters Most): A Silver Maple Strategies Podcast with Nate Birt

#5: Discover Your Narrative Worth: 'What Someone Will Say About You When You're Not in the Room'

39 min · 15. juni 2026
episode #5: Discover Your Narrative Worth: 'What Someone Will Say About You When You're Not in the Room' cover

Beskrivelse

In this episode, I talk with Toby from California about friendship, identity, aging, and the conversations that help us become more fully known. Toby introduces us to the Australian idea of mateship: the kind of trusted connection where someone has your back, listens without judgment, and offers honest perspective when you need it most. From there, we explore what Toby calls narrative worth—the fuller story of who we are beyond job titles, résumés, and the narrow ways we often introduce ourselves. These themes eventually led us into a poignant and practical conversation about aging, caregiving, planning ahead, and the hard-but-loving conversations families need to have before crisis arrives. Toby speaks honestly about turning 65, caring for a neurodivergent adult son, and thinking through how to prepare well for the people he loves. In this episode, we explore: * What "mateship" means and why trusted circles matter * How friendship can offer honest feedback without the usual family or workplace filters * Why your story is bigger than your title, résumé, or LinkedIn profile * Toby's idea of "narrative worth" and how you can use it to shape how you show up * How hidden parts of our lives can reveal meaningful strengths * The importance of planning ahead for aging, care, and family responsibility Reflection question: What part of your story have you kept hidden or minimized that might actually help others understand who you really are? Links and resources mentioned: * Connect with Toby on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tobintrevarthen/]. * Learn more about Toby's work with narrative strategy at Spatial Shift [https://www.spatialshift.com/]. * Explore The DO Lectures [https://thedolectures.com/courses/], where Toby's international circle of friends first began connecting through writing and community. * Learn about The DO Lectures Micro Blog System [https://thedolectures.com/online-courses/micro-blog-system-online/], the writing course Toby mentions as part of how the group first formed. * Learn more about DO Loss [https://thedolectures.com/products/do-loss-a-new-way-to-move-through-change/], the book Toby references in connection with grief, loss, and moving through change. If you or someone you know has a meaningful, life-affirming story to share on Perennial Pen, email me at nate@silvermaplestrategies.com. Until next time, listen for what matters most.

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Alle episoder

7 episoder

episode #6: 'You Are Not Stuck Until You Stop' cover

#6: 'You Are Not Stuck Until You Stop'

What do a grandmother's red dress, a muddy river lot, and an old International Travelall have to teach us about confidence, hard work, connection, and legacy? In this episode, I talk with Amy from Iowa about the life lessons she learned from her grandparents — lessons that have shaped the way she leads, works, serves, and shows up for the people around her. Amy shares the story of her grandmother walking into a room in a red dress and teaching her that if you choose to be somewhere, you should know why you're there. She also tells the story of her grandfather teaching her how to "drive in the snow" on a muddy lot after a flood — and reminding her that you are not stuck until you stop. Along the way, Amy reflects on growing up as an introvert, learning to lead in agriculture, building trust in a family business, becoming a grandmother herself, and understanding that real connection is not just about whose name is in your book — it is about whose book you are in. In this episode, we explore: * The confidence and dignity Amy learned from her grandmother * Why it matters to know your purpose when you walk into a room * The power of keeping forward momentum when life swerves * What grandparents can offer through presence, support, and affirmation * How hard work, trust, and connection shape leadership * Why meaningful relationships are built through mutual care, not just networking Sincere thanks to Lee Williams for his fantastic production of this and every episode of Perennial Pen. Reflection question: Where in your life do you need to keep moving — even if the road is muddy or uncertain? More about Amy: Amy's LinkedIn profile: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-asmus-78a1a241/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/amy-asmus-78a1a241/] Asmus Farm Supply: https://www.afschem.com/ [https://www.afschem.com/] Call to action: If you or someone you know has a meaningful, life-affirming story to share on Perennial Pen, email me at nate@silvermaplestrategies.com [nate@silvermaplestrategies.com]. I respond to every message personally!

I går39 min
episode #5: Discover Your Narrative Worth: 'What Someone Will Say About You When You're Not in the Room' cover

#5: Discover Your Narrative Worth: 'What Someone Will Say About You When You're Not in the Room'

In this episode, I talk with Toby from California about friendship, identity, aging, and the conversations that help us become more fully known. Toby introduces us to the Australian idea of mateship: the kind of trusted connection where someone has your back, listens without judgment, and offers honest perspective when you need it most. From there, we explore what Toby calls narrative worth—the fuller story of who we are beyond job titles, résumés, and the narrow ways we often introduce ourselves. These themes eventually led us into a poignant and practical conversation about aging, caregiving, planning ahead, and the hard-but-loving conversations families need to have before crisis arrives. Toby speaks honestly about turning 65, caring for a neurodivergent adult son, and thinking through how to prepare well for the people he loves. In this episode, we explore: * What "mateship" means and why trusted circles matter * How friendship can offer honest feedback without the usual family or workplace filters * Why your story is bigger than your title, résumé, or LinkedIn profile * Toby's idea of "narrative worth" and how you can use it to shape how you show up * How hidden parts of our lives can reveal meaningful strengths * The importance of planning ahead for aging, care, and family responsibility Reflection question: What part of your story have you kept hidden or minimized that might actually help others understand who you really are? Links and resources mentioned: * Connect with Toby on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tobintrevarthen/]. * Learn more about Toby's work with narrative strategy at Spatial Shift [https://www.spatialshift.com/]. * Explore The DO Lectures [https://thedolectures.com/courses/], where Toby's international circle of friends first began connecting through writing and community. * Learn about The DO Lectures Micro Blog System [https://thedolectures.com/online-courses/micro-blog-system-online/], the writing course Toby mentions as part of how the group first formed. * Learn more about DO Loss [https://thedolectures.com/products/do-loss-a-new-way-to-move-through-change/], the book Toby references in connection with grief, loss, and moving through change. If you or someone you know has a meaningful, life-affirming story to share on Perennial Pen, email me at nate@silvermaplestrategies.com. Until next time, listen for what matters most.

15. juni 202639 min
episode #4: 'Life Is For You To Be Happy, And For The People Around You To Be Happy' cover

#4: 'Life Is For You To Be Happy, And For The People Around You To Be Happy'

In this episode, I visit with Nerma from Puerto Rico about entrepreneurship, motherhood, resilience, and the courage it takes to build a life that reflects what matters most to each of us. Nerma shares how becoming a mother led her to pursue entrepreneurship--not as a glamorous escape, but as a practical way to create flexibility, stability, and dignity for her family. Along the way, she learned hard lessons about leadership, mistakes, team building, and the responsibility of helping others pursue their dreams. What strikes me most about this conversation is Nerma's deep conviction that we already carry many of the tools we need. Her mother taught her resilience through hardship. A college professor reminded her to look inside of herself for everything she needed to be successful. And now, through her work with entrepreneurs, Nerma helps others see a path forward for themselves, their families, and their communities. We also talk about life in Puerto Rico (and what outsiders often misunderstanda about it), the richness of family culture, and how to reframe your definition of success by focusing on the quality of your life and the happiness you are building, rather than on someone else's standards. In this episode, we explore: * How motherhood shaped Nerma's path into entrepreneurship * Why mistakes are part of growth, not proof of failure * The responsibility of leading a team with humility and care * What Puerto Rico can teach us about family, place, and belonging * How parents can know if their efforts in raising their children are paying off * Why true success begins with knowing what makes you and your loved ones happy Reflection question: What definition of success are you living by right now—and is it truly your own? Learn more about Nerma: Connect with Nerma on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nermaalbertorio/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nermaalbertorio/] Visit Nerma's website: https://nermaalbertorio.com/ [https://nermaalbertorio.com/] Call to action:If you or someone you know has a meaningful, life-affirming story to share on Perennial Pen, email Nate at nate@silvermaplestrategies.com [nate@silvermaplestrategies.com].

8. juni 202642 min
episode #3: 'Be Grateful For Every Day That You Have, Because You Never Know When It Might Be Your Last': Vietnam War Veteran Turned Boomer Comedian cover

#3: 'Be Grateful For Every Day That You Have, Because You Never Know When It Might Be Your Last': Vietnam War Veteran Turned Boomer Comedian

In this episode, I talk with Jay, a Washington state-based Vietnam War veteran, longtime benefit auctioneer, entrepreneur, and comedian whose life has been shaped by gratitude, endurance, and the healing power of laughter. Jay shares the sobering lesson he learned as a young helicopter pilot during the Vietnam War: Every day is a gift, and none of us knows how much time we have. That experience has stayed with him ever since, and it eventually shaped the way he approached work, family, risk, service, and humor. We also talk about the unexpected school fundraising meeting that changed the direction of his career. What began as a simple effort to help his son's choir travel overseas became the start of a decades-long calling: helping nonprofits raise money with purpose, structure, and joy. What struck me most is how Jay connects courage and laughter. Whether he's talking about war, entrepreneurship, fundraising, or performing comedy for older adults, Jay always to a series of simple truths: Life is short, fear is real, and some of the best things in life are around the corner if we're only willing to let go. In this episode, we explore: * The life-changing lesson Jay learned as a helicopter pilot in Vietnam * Why gratitude can become a way of living, not just a feeling * How one school fundraiser became a turning point in Jay's career * What it means to "let go of the side of the pool" when fear is holding us back * Why humor helps people focus, connect, and feel alive * The importance of telling people what they mean to us while we still can Sincere thanks to Lee Williams for producing this and every episode of Perennial Pen (What Matters Most). Find Jay online: Boomer Comedian on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@boomercomedian [https://www.youtube.com/@boomercomedian] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jay-fiske-0966a/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jay-fiske-0966a/] MaestroSoft bio: https://www.maestrosoft.com/jay-fiske [https://www.maestrosoft.com/jay-fiske] Reflection question: Who is one person in your life you'd want to thank, encourage, or honor if you knew tomorrow wasn't guaranteed? (Bonus: Get going and say that thing to them - right now!) Call to action: If you or someone you know has a meaningful, life-affirming story to share on Perennial Pen, email me at nate@silvermaplestrategies.com [nate@silvermaplestrategies.com]. I reply to every message personally, and I'm always looking for amazing guests and stories to feature. Until next time, listen for what matters most.

2. juni 202633 min
episode #2: How to Achieve Your Lifelong Dream of Becoming an Author After Age 60 cover

#2: How to Achieve Your Lifelong Dream of Becoming an Author After Age 60

What happens when a childhood dream waits quietly for decades—and then finally gets its chance? In this episode, I talk with Mace from Missouri about writing, history, friendship, and the long road between wanting to do something meaningful as an author and finally beginning the journey. Mace grew up on a small farm in northeast Kansas, spent much of his career telling the stories of farm families and rural America, and later turned a sixth-grade dream of becoming an author into a new chapter of life after 60. We talk about the spark behind his historical fiction, the real-life people and places that inspired his books, and why stories from the past still have something to teach us today. Along the way, Mace shares a remarkable moment at a cemetery, the importance of friendship in shaping his work, and the simple but difficult truth that getting started is often the hardest part. In this episode, we explore: * The childhood dreams we carry with us for years * Why getting started can be the hardest step * How history helps us understand conviction, friendship, and human struggle * The role of rural life and farm families in Mace's storytelling * Why good characters sometimes begin to "tell" a writer where the story should go * The power of friendship to support the work we are called to do Reflection question: What is something you've wanted to do since childhood that might still be waiting for your attention? If you or someone you know has a meaningful, life-affirming story to share on Perennial Pen, email me at nate@silvermaplestrategies.com [nate@silvermaplestrategies.com]. I reply to every message personally! Resources mentioned on this episode Mace Thornton's author site: https://www.macethornton.com/ [https://www.macethornton.com/] Book Links The Ghosts of Gumbo Flats https://www.macethornton.com/the-ghosts-of-gumbo-flats [https://www.macethornton.com/the-ghosts-of-gumbo-flats?utm_source=chatgpt.com] Freedman Kansas farmer Moses embarks on a dangerous journey to rescue his wife and children torn from him by slavery in this historical fiction novel about buried truths, loss, and loyalty set in the period after the Civil War. Jawbone Holler https://www.macethornton.com/jawbone-holler [https://www.macethornton.com/jawbone-holler?utm_source=chatgpt.com] A historical fiction novel that follows Perry Adams' difficult arrival in Kansas Territory, including the harsh frontier, conflict around slavery, and the dream of building a farm and family. West Bottoms https://www.macethornton.com/west-bottoms [https://www.macethornton.com/west-bottoms?utm_source=chatgpt.com] This a Depression-era Kansas City novel co-authored by Mace Thornton and Rogers Brazier features railroads, industry, crime, forged bonds, and corruption set in the city's bustling West Bottoms district.

25. maj 202637 min