Everybody Wants Goth Girl Spit

Trash, Tattoos, and Torched Teslas

This week's episode is a certified fever dream. We open with a man in Fort Wayne who mutilated himself and used the evidence as literal kindling, then pivot to an Argentine flight instructor who bailed out of a plane mid-lesson and left his student to land it solo. Biohacker Bryan Johnson — the guy trying to live to 2140 — just found out his own stomach is eating itself, and an Idaho mom who blamed vaccines for her twins' deaths is now facing murder charges instead. On the crime beat: a Vegas Little League president blew $65K in team funds on strip clubs and ED pills, a Pasadena doctor who drove his family off a cliff walked free after a mental health diversion program, a New Jersey woman got busted for child sex abuse thanks to a very unfortunate tattoo, and an 84-year-old Florida man tried to torch his ex of 42 years and mostly just torched himself. Then we lighten it up (sort of) with a UK mom tossed from Tesco for a backless top, Swifties dropping real money on cubes of literal trash from Taylor and Travis's wedding, and Jersey Shore lifeguards earning hazard pay wrestling a drunk guy out of the surf. And because the news never stops: we break down the death of Sen. Lindsey Graham, the Mitch McConnell health-mystery-turned-fall-and-pneumonia saga, Conor McGregor's much-hyped UFC 329 comeback against Max Holloway (spoiler: it didn't go the way he predicted), and the World Cup semifinals shaping up with Argentina-England and France-Spain. Buckle up — this one's got everything.

Hot Dogs, Hot Tubs, Hot Cars

This week: a camel takes out its owner, a congressman discovers the sick leave he voted against, Waffle House gets sued over smokers' rights, a killer gouges his own eyes out, two different toddlers die in hot cars on the same holiday week, a Florida woman blames cocaine on a hookup, concert crowds are pooping themselves for TikTok, Joey Chestnut eats 66 hot dogs, an Aussie tourist is linked to multiple deaths in Thailand, a wife gets away with assaulting teen hockey players, a mom is investigated for cannibalism, and Taylor Swift marries a tight end at Madison Square Garden. Plus, what we've been watching this week.

Spit, Strangle, Steal

Someone left an unwanted movement at a Noah Kahan concert, a Florida man blamed the Antichrist for trying to steal a helicopter, and Argentina is using the World Cup to try and catch people who don't pay their child support. We discuss 6 ways your testicles can shrink, the Air Force changes their mind about the flu vaccine after 300 recruits get sick, and a fugitive that faked his own death is actually dead now! An Alabama man got instant karma after killing his girlfriend, an Arby's manager gave a customer herpes, and the Knicks trash-can thief has been identified. A Lions CB was cut due to kidnapping and armed robbery, we talk about what we're watching, and we do one of our most popular bits, But The Drag Queens Are The Problem! (Spoiler alert: they still aren't)

Land of the Free, Home of the Depraved

Two Detroit sisters attacked a restaurant worker over an incorrect order, a Japanese tourist wrote a touching ode to free chips and salsa in the US, and the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool now looks like the swamp Trump swore he was going to drain. Five men were arrested for planning an attack on the UFC Freedom 250 event, police killed a dog that was celebrating the Knicks win, and we have updates on the Anna Kepner murder story. The "Serial Squirter" was arrested again, Rex Heuermann was sentenced, and a Missouri man was sentenced to 291 years in prison for attacks on women. Carlos Mencia was arrested for tax evasion, a Texas woman is suing McDonald's over a deadly Sausage McMuffin, and a man was arrested for DUI with 34 empty White Claw cans in his front seat!

Raw Deal: Milk, Monkeys, and Murder at Sea

People in Idaho are getting sick (unsurprisingly) from drinking raw milk, a grandfather in Thailand learned by adopting a monkey isn't always the best idea, and there's finally been an arrest in the Anna Kepner case. Target got called out for charging more for larger clothing sizes, the JPMorgan case is back in the news, and a Venezuelan immigrant took his wife to a Trump hotel, which ended up exactly how you thought it might! Phones are being blamed for people not having babies, an influencer went viral for all the wrong reasons, and we talk about what we're watching. We also discuss the FIFA World Cup and the Knicks championship run!