I Was A Functional Drinker For 32 Years

I Was A Functional Drinker For 32 Years

For 32 years, Travis was a functional drinker who never got a DUI, never missed a day of work, and never fit the picture most people hold when they hear "drinking problem," but spent years hiding beers in the garage, lying to his wife about the count, and woke up after one Christmas morning knowing his kids had been worried Santa wasn't coming. He came to This Naked Mind thinking he might be able to moderate. He joined The Path in November 2023, had one more bad birthday, and threw out the last two bottles of a Wisconsin six-pack the next day. He's at 757 days alcohol-free. Coach Cole Harvey is here to hear him tell it. Travis and Coach Cole discuss: The pit party at 18 that set up a chase he'd spend the next 32 years trying to get back to Hiding beers in the garage, counting them in his head and lying about the number, and why the "alcoholic" label kept him from asking for help for years The Christmas his kids were worried Santa wasn't coming, and why even that didn't break the cycle A 2023 job loss that cracked things open, and the visualization exercise during a free Zoom that convinced him to commit to The Path What happened on his 50th birthday and the two bottles he threw out the next day The parallel mental health journey that changed what he understands about why he was drinking in the first place Nearly 30 pounds lost and one afternoon of yard work that proved something had shifted in his body What his 14-year-old daughter said to her friends about her dad, and why Travis still can't get through it without getting chills And more on neural pathway habits, the functional drinker's relationship with the "alcoholic" label, and finding your own path to alcohol freedom... Episode links: nakedmindpath.com Related episodes: Naked Life Story — Kat | NLS | EP 521 — https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-521-naked-life-story-kat/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-521-naked-life-story-kat/] Reader Question – Am I an Alcoholic? | EP 58 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-58-reader-question-alcoholic/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-58-reader-question-alcoholic/] How To Stop Drinking To Avoid Emotions | AFC | EP 845 — https://thisnakedmind.com/drinking-to-avoid-emotions-afc-e845/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/drinking-to-avoid-emotions-afc-e845/] Follow on Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/this-naked-mind-podcast/id1287269357 Follow on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0UB06sNguPjVvgAYFBcR9I?si=b7568f24c21249ff Ready to take the next step? Visit https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/podcast-resources for free resources, programs, and more. Until next week, stay curious! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp, Quince, Shopify, Zazzle, and OSEA. BetterHelp: BetterHelp is offering our listeners 10% off at ⁠betterhelp.com/nakedmind⁠ [http://betterhelp.com/nakedmind] Quince: Get free shipping and 365-day returns at ⁠quince.com/naked⁠ [http://quince.com/naked] Shopify: Sign up for free trial at ⁠shopify.com/mind⁠ [http://shopify.com/mind] Zazzle: Save 25% on your first order at ⁠zazzle.com⁠ [http://zazzle.com] OSEA: Get 10% off your first order sitewide with code NAKEDMIND at ⁠OSEAMalibu.com⁠ [http://oseamalibu.com]

Why You Drink To Fit In

Andrew and Adele both know why they need alcohol to socialize — or think they do. For Adele, 64 and living in a New Zealand wine region, it started at 14 in the back of a school bus and never really stopped being about fitting in. For Andrew, who is navigating a late-life ADHD diagnosis and the possible end of his marriage, the answer turned out to go a lot deeper than the social stuff. Andrew discusses: His late-life ADHD diagnosis and why emotional dysregulation makes the pull toward alcohol so much harder to catch. Realizing he has never felt safe — and how his body already knew that before he did What finally made his marriage struggles make complete sense The hand-on-heart technique from Coach Zoe and how it's helping him regulate in real time Finding The Path after his wife asked for a divorce — and what group coaching calls unlocked Adele discusses: Fifty years of drinking to fit in, starting at 14 in the back of a school bus Why AA's shame-based language kept her stuck, and what changed when she joined The Path The five-year-old who felt different, rejected, and vulnerable after her parents' divorce Struggling to show compassion for her younger self because of choices she hasn't forgiven The visualization practice that gave her a glimpse of something she hadn't felt in a long time: peace And more… Coach Zoe Ewart is a Certified Naked Mind Senior Coach who brings her experience and understanding to help with the tricky parts of life's big changes. Her coaching gives you an enjoyable, light-hearted, and safe environment to effortlessly take back control of alcohol so you can feel better physically, mentally, and spiritually. Zoe taught Pilates for 15 years. She has four adult children and more animals than the Ark ever had. Learn more about Coach Zoe: https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/zoe-ewart/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/zoe-ewart/] Coach Hayley Scherders is a certified TNM Coach with training from the Canadian Addiction and Mental Health Association. Drawing from personal experiences, Hayley understands how tough change can be and provides a safe, compassionate, and judgment-free space where her clients can feel supported. She believes that with the right mindset, anyone can change their life at any time. Learn more about Coach Hayley: https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/hayley-scherders/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/hayley-scherders/] Episode links: nakedmindpath.com Related episodes: Using Alcohol to Cope | Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 736 –https://thisnakedmind.com/self-love-is-the-key-alcohol-freedom-coaching-e736/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/self-love-is-the-key-alcohol-freedom-coaching-e736/] Building Genuine Connections Without Alcohol | Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 821 – https://thisnakedmind.com/building-genuine-connections-without-alcohol-e821/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/building-genuine-connections-without-alcohol-e821/] The Cost of Fitting In | Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 785 – https://thisnakedmind.com/the-cost-of-fitting-in-alcohol-freedom-coaching-e785/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/the-cost-of-fitting-in-alcohol-freedom-coaching-e785/] CTA Follow on Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/this-naked-mind-podcast/id1287269357 Follow on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0UB06sNguPjVvgAYFBcR9I?si=b7568f24c21249ff Ready to take the next step? Visit https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/podcast-resources for free resources, programs, and more. Until next week, stay curious! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp, Quince, Shopify, Zazzle, and OSEA. BetterHelp: BetterHelp is offering our listeners 10% off at ⁠betterhelp.com/nakedmind⁠ [http://betterhelp.com/nakedmind] Quince: Get free shipping and 365-day returns at ⁠quince.com/naked⁠ [http://quince.com/naked] Shopify: Sign up for free trial at ⁠shopify.com/mind⁠ [http://shopify.com/mind] Zazzle: Save 25% on your first order at ⁠zazzle.com⁠ [http://zazzle.com] OSEA: Get 10% off your first order sitewide with code NAKEDMIND at ⁠OSEAMalibu.com⁠ [http://oseamalibu.com]

Summer of Love

In Summer of Love, Kerri Maher writes about wine country glamour, shame that runs across generations, and the woman at the center who can't quite say out loud what she knows about herself. She lived that from the inside before she could write it clearly. She read Annie Grace's This Naked Mind in its earliest self-published form in 2016, stopped drinking for 15 months, then convinced herself the problem had been unhappiness and let it back in, and spent four more years in the push and pull: a sticky note on the fridge that kept watching her fail, sneak drinking she couldn't rationalize away, and a strange accidental last act at the end of 2021 that finally closed the door. This conversation with Coach Hayley is the first time she's said any of it out loud. Kerri and Coach Hayley discuss: What Kerri's first, unspoken reaction to a friend's news told her about herself — and why she almost didn't register it Why reading Annie Grace's This Naked Mind in its earliest self-published edition wasn't the simple end of the story The sticky note on the fridge, the promise it represented, and what she was still doing while it stayed up A question from the Sober Powered podcast that gave her chills — and why it took her years to answer honestly What emotional regulation, perimenopause, and a coaching certification all have to do with finding freedom from alcohol What she gave the Dawn character in Summer of Love that she could only have given her from the other side And more on the community that finally felt like home, mental real estate, and what "you are doing it" really means when the process is nonlinear... Hayley Scherders is a certified TNM Coach with training from the Canadian Addiction and Mental Health Association. Drawing from personal experiences, Hayley understands how tough change can be and provides a safe, compassionate, and judgment-free space where her clients can feel supported. She believes that with the right mindset, anyone can change their life at any time. Learn more about Coach Hayley: https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/hayley-scherders/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/hayley-scherders/] Episode links: thisnakedmindapp.com [http://thisnakedmindapp.com] https://amzn.to/4fBVKEq [https://amzn.to/4fBVKEq] (As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.)  Related episodes: We Are the Luckiest | Laura McKowen | EP 241 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-241-we-are-the-luckiest-with-laura-mckowen/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-241-we-are-the-luckiest-with-laura-mckowen/]  Reader Question: How Do You Deal with the Romanticism of the Food and Wine Culture? | EP 294 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-294-reader-question-how-do-you-deal-with-the-romanticism-of-the-food-wine-culture-when-youre-alcohol-free/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-294-reader-question-how-do-you-deal-with-the-romanticism-of-the-food-wine-culture-when-youre-alcohol-free/]  Creating A New Identity After Quitting Drinking | Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 801 - https://thisnakedmind.com/creating-a-new-identity-after-quitting-drinking-alcohol-freedom-freedom-coaching-e801/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/creating-a-new-identity-after-quitting-drinking-alcohol-freedom-freedom-coaching-e801/]  Follow on Apple Podcasts: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/this-naked-mind-podcast/id1287269357 Follow on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0UB06sNguPjVvgAYFBcR9I?si=b7568f24c21249ff Ready to take the next step? Visit https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/podcast-resources for free resources, programs, and more. Until next week, stay curious! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp, Quince, Shopify, Zazzle, and OSEA. BetterHelp: BetterHelp is offering our listeners 10% off at betterhelp.com/nakedmind [http://betterhelp.com/nakedmind] Quince: Get free shipping and 365-day returns at quince.com/naked [http://quince.com/naked] Shopify: Sign up for free trial at shopify.com/mind [http://shopify.com/mind] Zazzle: Save 25% on your first order at zazzle.com [http://zazzle.com] OSEA: Get 10% off your first order sitewide with code NAKEDMIND at OSEAMalibu.com [http://oseamalibu.com]

Why You Keep Going Back To Alcohol

Alcohol Freedom Coaching | EP 919 If you're trying to figure out how to stop drinking for good, you’ll want to tune in for this episode. Shannon is 14 days alcohol-free and the first person on either side of her family to ever try changing their drinking — and every time a family member sets down their glass because she isn't having one, the guilt shows up right on schedule. Amy read This Naked Mind five years ago, went alcohol-free for five months, lost her mother during COVID, and spent five years trying to get back. She's six weeks in now and more afraid of losing it than she's been afraid of anything she's built for herself. Listen and find out what actually gets in the way for both of them.Shannon discusses: Growing up surrounded by heavy drinkers & being the first to step away The guilt she carries when family members say they "won't drink either" on her account Tracing people-pleasing back to a 7-year-old part of herself who learned to be responsible for others' feelings Her ALIVE goal: free, full of hope and joy, not chained to a substance or to other people's reactions Amy discusses: Being six weeks alcohol-free and terrified of losing what she's worked so hard to build Reading This Naked Mind five years ago, going alcohol-free for five months, losing her mother during COVID, and drinking again for five years The shift from holding alcohol freedom in a clenched fist to an open hand How taking care of her granddaughter became the biggest trigger — and how she navigated it without drinking And more from both guests… Cole Harvey is a certified Naked Mind Senior Coach. For years, he felt lost and used alcohol to cope, until he decided to go alcohol-free and focus on finding his purpose. Through curiosity, self-compassion, and adventure, he transformed his life. As a habit change and mindset coach, Cole helps young men understand themselves, build better habits, and find meaning. Learn more about Coach Cole: https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/cole-harvey/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/cole-harvey/] Zoe Ewart is a Certified Naked Mind Senior Coach who brings her experience and understanding to help with the tricky parts of life’s big changes. Her coaching gives you an enjoyable, light-hearted, and safe environment to effortlessly take back control of alcohol so you can feel better physically, mentally, and spiritually. Zoe taught Pilates for 15 years. She has four adult children and more animals than the Ark ever had. Learn more about Coach Zoe: https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/zoe-ewart/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/coach/zoe-ewart/] Episode links: nakedmindpath.com [https://nakedmindpath.com] Related episodes: Stop Making Excuses to Drink Again - EP 664 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-664-readers-question-how-do-i-stop-making-excuses-to-drink-again/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-664-readers-question-how-do-i-stop-making-excuses-to-drink-again/] Why Do People Go Back to Drinking? - EP 730 -  https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-730-coaches-podcast-coach-ellie-with-lauri-m-tina-m/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-730-coaches-podcast-coach-ellie-with-lauri-m-tina-m/] Overcoming the Fear of Drinking Again - EP 741 - https://thisnakedmind.com/overcoming-the-fear-of-drinking-again-erins-naked-life-e741/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/overcoming-the-fear-of-drinking-again-erins-naked-life-e741/] Ready to take the next step? Visit https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/podcast-resources [https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/podcast-resources] for free resources, programs, and more. Until next week, stay curious! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp, Green Chef, Quince, Shopify, Zazzle, and OSEA. BetterHelp: BetterHelp is offering our listeners 10% off at ⁠betterhelp.com/nakedmind ⁠ [http://betterhelp.com/nakedmind]Green Chef: Get 50% off your first month, then 20% percent off for 2 month at ⁠greenchef.com/NAKEDMIND ⁠ [http://greenchef.com/NAKEDMIND]Quince: get free shipping and 365-day returns at ⁠quince.com/naked⁠ [http://quince.com/naked]Shopify: Sign up for $1 month trial at ⁠shopify.com/mind⁠ [http://shopify.com/mind] Zazzle: Save 25% on your first order at ⁠zazzle.com⁠ [http://zazzle.com] OSEA: Get 10% off your first order sitewide with code NAKEDMIND at ⁠OSEAMalibu.com⁠ [http://oseamalibu.com]

When AA Isn’t Working

Tim's Naked Life | EP 918 When AA isn't working, most people assume they're the problem — not committed enough, not broken enough, not at rock bottom enough to figure it all out and make a change. Tim Kelly thought that too. A 30-year sales professional who'd always been able to muscle through whatever came at him, Tim spent years inside 12-step programs and still couldn't stop drinking. In this episode, he sits down with Coach Cole Harvey to talk about what finally changed, and why the answer was never about trying harder.  Tim and Coach Cole discuss: What five or six AA meetings a week for years actually felt like inside him, when all the work never brought the contentment he was looking for The night his fiancée found him drinking again and chose to stay, and why Tim believes that one decision may have saved his life Picking up Annie Grace's book and signing up for a Live Alcohol Experiment, the best $48 he's ever spent Why a numbers-driven, 30-year sales professional was skeptical that curiosity could do what years of hard work hadn't, and how that changed The "be where your hands are" grounding technique he learned in the Live Alcohol Experiment and still uses today Not walking his daughter down the aisle, carrying that grief openly, and how it became the reason he decided to become a coach And more on self-compassion, the "I know nothing" coaching philosophy, what the brain does when it decides you're broken, and so much more Episode links: alcoholexperiment.com [http://alcoholexperiment.com] Tim's coaching practice: https://onwardafcoaching.com/ [https://onwardafcoaching.com/]  Related episodes: Is AA Not the Only Answer? Ginelle's Naked Life | Naked Life Stories | EP 693 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-693-naked-life-story-ginelle-t/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-693-naked-life-story-ginelle-t/]  Finding Hidden Blessings: Tom's Naked Life | Naked Life Stories | EP 629 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-629-naked-life-story-tom-keppeler/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-629-naked-life-story-tom-keppeler/]  Does Annie Grace Think AA Is Wrong? | Reader Question | EP 324 - https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-324-reader-question-does-annie-grace-think-aa-is-wrong/ [https://thisnakedmind.com/ep-324-reader-question-does-annie-grace-think-aa-is-wrong/]   Follow on Apple Podcasts podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/this-naked-mind-podcast/id1287269357 Follow on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/0UB06sNguPjVvgAYFBcR9I?si=b7568f24c21249ff Ready to take the next step? Visit https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/podcast-resources for free resources, programs, and more. Until next week, stay curious! This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp, Green Chef, Quince, Shopify, Zazzle, and OSEA. BetterHelp: BetterHelp is offering our listeners 10% off at ⁠betterhelp.com/nakedmind ⁠ [http://betterhelp.com/nakedmind]Green Chef: Get 50% off your first month, then 20% percent off for 2 month at ⁠greenchef.com/NAKEDMIND ⁠ [http://greenchef.com/NAKEDMIND]Quince: get free shipping and 365-day returns at ⁠quince.com/naked⁠ [http://quince.com/naked]Shopify: Sign up for $1 month trial at ⁠shopify.com/mind⁠ [http://shopify.com/mind] Zazzle: Save 25% on your first order at ⁠zazzle.com⁠ [http://zazzle.com] OSEA: Get 10% off your first order sitewide with code NAKEDMIND at ⁠OSEAMalibu.com⁠ [http://oseamalibu.com]