The Hidden Cost Of Always Saying Yes

Sherlock Holmes and the Art of Confidence: When Evidence Becomes Overthinking

Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/fan_mail/new] You can know the right answer and still feel unsure the moment you have to act.  That single gap between knowledge and trust is where work stress and anxiety loves to live, especially for conscientious people who carry responsibility and want to do a good job. We share the story of Caroline, a 25-year-old newly qualified pharmacist who reads a prescription, understands what to do, then checks and checks again.  She isn’t unsafe or careless, but her delays start to appear uncertain to others.  From managers rewriting emails to teachers second-guessing lessons, we explore why overthinking at work is so common among smart, capable professionals, and why “just be more confident” misses the point. The turning point comes with a Sherlock Holmes lens: great detectives gather evidence, but they also stop.  Overthinking is often not a lack of ability, but evidence gathering with no finish line.  We talk about how training, exams, and constant assessment can condition your nervous system to behave as if you’re still being marked, long after you’re qualified.  Then we introduce a practical way to end the mental loop by chairing the “committee meeting” inside your head, deciding which protective voice gets the casting vote. You’ll leave with a simple three-question exercise to separate facts from assumptions and fear, and a clearer definition of confidence as timely professional judgment.  If you know someone stuck in reassurance seeking, perfectionism, imposter syndrome, or decision paralysis, share this with them.  Subscribe, leave a review, and tell us what decision you’re ready to close the case on. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers [http://herguru.uk/disclaimers] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/support] If this episode helped, please share it with someone who needs a calmer five minutes: https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] If you'd like to support the podcast, leaving a review genuinely helps other overwhelmed humans find it without having to survive another "10x your mindset" podcast first: https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] Join the HerGuru WhatsApp Channel: https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite [https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite] Got feedback, a question, or a future episode suggestion? https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety [https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety] Work Stress Anxiety by ABGW is part of HerGuru Hypnotherapy and Coaching™ and grounded in the ABGW Method®. Calm first. Reality first. Then change.™ Connect with Cheryl Paris LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog [https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog] Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/ [https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/] Shared stories are anonymised. This podcast is provided for educational and reflective purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychologica...

Why Sleep Is the Ultimate Act of Self-Respect

Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/fan_mail/new] You can spend thousands chasing better health and still feel worn out, snappy, foggy, and stuck in your own head at night. We keep buying the tools, but we keep postponing the most powerful recovery process we already have: sleep. And if work stress or anxiety is running your evenings, that postponement starts to look less like “productivity” and more like self neglect. We tell a story about Ella, a high achieving counsellor who supports everyone else all day, then quietly bargains away her own rest each night. It starts with good intentions and ends with midnight, scrolling, one more email, one more task, and then the lights go out and her brain starts the night shift. From there, we push back on the cultural badge of honour that says exhaustion equals commitment, and we borrow a surprisingly sharp lesson from Bagpuss: when work is finished, rest without guilt, then wake fully when it is time. We also break down a crucial sleep myth: nothing is happening while you sleep. Your body is repairing tissue, balancing hormones, strengthening immunity, sorting memory, and regulating emotions. When you cut sleep short, you do not just lose rest, you interrupt the very system that makes patience, clarity, and resilience possible. We end with a simple seven night experiment: a five minute “landing strip” before bed that signals safety and closure to your nervous system, without turning bedtime into another impossible wellness routine. If this resonates, subscribe, share it with someone who is burning the candle at both ends, and leave a review. What is the one thing that most often steals your sleep? The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers [http://herguru.uk/disclaimers] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/support] If this episode helped, please share it with someone who needs a calmer five minutes: https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] If you'd like to support the podcast, leaving a review genuinely helps other overwhelmed humans find it without having to survive another "10x your mindset" podcast first: https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] Join the HerGuru WhatsApp Channel: https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite [https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite] Got feedback, a question, or a future episode suggestion? https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety [https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety] Work Stress Anxiety by ABGW is part of HerGuru Hypnotherapy and Coaching™ and grounded in the ABGW Method®. Calm first. Reality first. Then change.™ Connect with Cheryl Paris LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog [https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog] Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/ [https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/] Shared stories are anonymised. This podcast is provided for educational and reflective purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychologica...

Mr Darcy, Workplace Anxiety and the Exhaustion of Being the Capable One

Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/fan_mail/new] You can be excellent at your job and still be running on fumes. We talk about the kind of competence that gets applauded, the calm voice, the quick fixes, the “no problem” email, and how that same capability can quietly turn into a costume that drains your health. I introduce Frederica, a high-performing interior designer who manages people, holds pressure, and keeps everything moving while feeling depleted in a way sleep cannot touch. Together we name the workplace trap: the more capable you seem, the less anyone checks whether you are coping. We also look at the nervous system side of work stress and workplace anxiety, the old rulebook that says don’t disappoint, don’t need too much, don’t be difficult, and how those rules can feel logical even when they are exhausting. You’ll hear why praise does not convince your body that the load is sustainable, and how the signs show up anyway: jaw tension, shallow breathing, that stomach drop when another message lands, and the 2am “complaint department” in your brain. Then we shift the goal from being endlessly reliable to being sustainably capable, professional without self-abandonment. We end with practical, low-drama tools you can use today: pause before the automatic yes, name the rule you feel you “must” follow, loosen it by one notch, and try one clean boundary sentence that does not apologise for your existence. If this resonated, subscribe, share it with a capable friend who is carrying too much, and leave a review so more people can find support, what’s the old rule you’re ready to rewrite? The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers [http://herguru.uk/disclaimers] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/support] If this episode helped, please share it with someone who needs a calmer five minutes: https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] If you'd like to support the podcast, leaving a review genuinely helps other overwhelmed humans find it without having to survive another "10x your mindset" podcast first: https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] Join the HerGuru WhatsApp Channel: https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite [https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite] Got feedback, a question, or a future episode suggestion? https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety [https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety] Work Stress Anxiety by ABGW is part of HerGuru Hypnotherapy and Coaching™ and grounded in the ABGW Method®. Calm first. Reality first. Then change.™ Connect with Cheryl Paris LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog [https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog] Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/ [https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/] Shared stories are anonymised. This podcast is provided for educational and reflective purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychologica...

The Stupid Idea of Perfection: Why Life Isn't a Maths Exam

Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/fan_mail/new] Perfection is supposed to make us feel confident, but it often does the opposite: it keeps us stuck, second-guessing messages we already sent and replaying moments we cannot change. We dig into why that happens, why “perfect” is an imaginary finish line, and why chasing it can quietly amplify work stress, anxiety, procrastination, and imposter syndrome. If you’ve ever felt like life is one long performance review, you’re going to recognise yourself here.  We share a real moment from behind the mic, including the truth about recording a first episode 31 times, and we ask the uncomfortable question underneath it: was that about making something better, or trying to prove something? From there, we dismantle the belief that perfection equals worthiness. We explore “moving goalposts,” borrowed self-esteem, and the exhausting habit of turning dinner, rest, relationships, and work into constant assessments. We also use a simple reality check from the natural world: growth and adaptation are normal, perfection is not.  Then we shift into a calmer, more workable framework: growth. Confidence doesn’t arrive first; evidence arrives first, and confidence catches up as you take imperfect action and recover from mistakes. You’ll leave with practical experiments you can try today, including leaving one thing at good enough, doing an unexpected act of kindness, and swapping “Was I good enough?” for “What did I learn?”  If this helps, subscribe, share it with a friend who’s stuck in the perfection loop, and leave a review so more people can find it. Where is perfection stealing your time right now? The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers [http://herguru.uk/disclaimers] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/support] If this episode helped, please share it with someone who needs a calmer five minutes: https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] If you'd like to support the podcast, leaving a review genuinely helps other overwhelmed humans find it without having to survive another "10x your mindset" podcast first: https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] Join the HerGuru WhatsApp Channel: https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite [https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite] Got feedback, a question, or a future episode suggestion? https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety [https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety] Work Stress Anxiety by ABGW is part of HerGuru Hypnotherapy and Coaching™ and grounded in the ABGW Method®. Calm first. Reality first. Then change.™ Connect with Cheryl Paris LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog [https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog] Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/ [https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/] Shared stories are anonymised. This podcast is provided for educational and reflective purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychologica...

Fear-Based Leadership at Work: What Voldemort Can Teach Us About Ego, Power and the Price of Fear

Contact us by whatsapp on +447485622662- let us know what you think of this episode. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/fan_mail/new] A room can feel fine one second and unsafe the next, all because one person walks in. We’ve both felt that sudden shift: conversations stop, shoulders rise, and everyone starts editing themselves in real time. We dig into what’s really happening when a manager uses fear to control a meeting, and why that kind of leadership gets mistaken for “respect” even as it erodes confidence across the team. We also get practical about the body side of work stress and anxiety. Your nervous system is built to scan for patterns and ask “Am I safe?” long before your logical mind catches up. That’s why unpredictable criticism can trigger overthinking, rehearsing, and endless email rewrites. Rather than treating overthinking like a personality flaw, we frame it as a protective response to an environment that has taught you mistakes come with a heavy cost. Then we zoom the lens out. Instead of automatically asking “What’s wrong with me?”, we practise asking “What pattern am I looking at?” Patterns are evidence, and they help you stop turning someone else’s mood into your identity. We share a simple detective method you can try this week: capture the facts, look for evidence of your part, and collect evidence about the other person’s behaviour too. If you’ve been dealing with a toxic manager, fear-based leadership, or constant meeting anxiety, this is a reset for how you interpret what’s happening and how you protect your confidence. Subscribe, share with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find Work Stress Anxiety. The contents of this podcast are for informational purposes only and should not be considered medical advice. If you have a specific health concern or condition, please consult a qualified Healthcare professional for more details. Check out herguru dot uk forward slash disclaimers [http://herguru.uk/disclaimers] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2286309/support] If this episode helped, please share it with someone who needs a calmer five minutes: https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://followthepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] If you'd like to support the podcast, leaving a review genuinely helps other overwhelmed humans find it without having to survive another "10x your mindset" podcast first: https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety [https://lovethepodcast.com/workstressanxiety] Join the HerGuru WhatsApp Channel: https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite [https://go.workstressanxiety.com/whatsappinvite] Got feedback, a question, or a future episode suggestion? https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety [https://podcastfeedback.com/workstressanxiety] Work Stress Anxiety by ABGW is part of HerGuru Hypnotherapy and Coaching™ and grounded in the ABGW Method®. Calm first. Reality first. Then change.™ Connect with Cheryl Paris LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/cherylparis/] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog [https://www.facebook.com/abgwblog] Disclaimer: https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/ [https://herguru.uk/disclaimers/] Shared stories are anonymised. This podcast is provided for educational and reflective purposes only and does not constitute medical, psychologica...