A little on performative intellectualism, a lot on The Life of a Showgirl

A little on AI grad speeches, Victoria's Secret, and the Summer House finale

We’re back with 39 minutes of complaints disguised as social commentary, and 1 minute of me apologizing for my absence. Much to snark on re: those AI commencement speeches, the Victoria’s Secret mall “casting,” and a specific moment in the Summer House finale that deserves more attention.  Want to put a microtrend under the microscope? Send your topic submission to saltlacroix@gmail.com  XO, Gabrielle (⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@saltlacroix⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/saltlacroix/])

A lot on the saltiest (and sweetest) moments of 2025

It was the best of times, it was the beigest of times (aka the worst) and it’s time to celebrate it all. We’ve got a very full mailbag of 2025’s salty moments and silver linings (thanks!) plus some reflective corniness. HNY & ILYSM.  Want to put a microtrend under the microscope? Send your topic submission to saltlacroix@gmail.com  XO, Gabrielle (⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@saltlacroix⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/saltlacroix/])

A little on Meadow Lane, a lot on Pantone's Color of the Year

The only thing whiter than the grab and go food at Meadow Lane is Pantone’s Color of the Year 2026 (spoiler alert, it’s white). I have some belated thoughts on the unbearable beigeness of Meadow Lane’s make-believe grocery store, plus a deeper look at “Cloud Dancer”: the color of playing in our face.  Want to put a microtrend under the microscope? Send your topic submission to saltlacroix@gmail.com  XO, Gabrielle (⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@saltlacroix⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/saltlacroix/])

A little on Sydney Sweeney's GQ interview, a lot on Penmar People

I thought we had put Sydney Sweeney’s American Eagle campaign to bed, but I forgot that Spokane Sam the groundhog came up to burp last week, signaling six more weeks of bullshit. A little on that GQ interview, some TV opinions, plus a light investigation into the “Penmar Person” archetype. Venice MAGA, if you will. P.S. The Salt on the Table substack is live ⁠HERE⁠ [https://saltlacroix.substack.com/] Want to put a microtrend under the microscope? Send your topic submission to saltlacroix@gmail.com  XO, Gabrielle (⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@saltlacroix⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/saltlacroix/])

A little on Tyra's hot ice cream, a lot on gullibility

Personally, I hadn’t considered the idea of hot ice cream before, but Tyra’s Smize Cream is here to change our minds. Need to know if you would try. Also need to know if you’re in Group 7 and your feelings on a proposed American nostalgia based amusement park (this is every amusement park). We’ve never been in more Kidz Bop times. P.S. The Salt on the Table substack is live ⁠HERE⁠ [https://saltlacroix.substack.com/] Want to put a microtrend under the microscope? Send your topic submission to saltlacroix@gmail.com  XO, Gabrielle (⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@saltlacroix⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/saltlacroix/])