How Narcissistic Abuse Rewires Your Nervous System: Self-Trust, Boundaries & Healing

How Narcissistic Abuse Rewires Your Nervous System: Self-Trust, Boundaries & Healing

Reach out! You don't have to explain how crazy she was. We believe you!!! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/fan_mail/new] In this powerful episode of Beyond Mommy Dearest, Noelani sits down with narcissistic abuse recovery coach Sami for an honest conversation about healing, self-trust, nervous system regulation, and breaking free from toxic relationship patterns. Sami shares her personal journey through multiple narcissistic relationships and explains how those experiences led her to become an advocate and coach for survivors. Together, Noelani and Sami explore the connection between childhood wounds, people-pleasing, emotional neglect, and the unconscious patterns that can keep survivors stuck in cycles of narcissistic abuse. The conversation dives deep into the physical signs of narcissistic abuse, including anxiety, insomnia, chronic headaches, hypervigilance, digestive issues, and the feeling that "something is off" even when everything appears fine on the surface. Noelani and Sami discuss: • Why survivors often struggle to trust themselves • How childhood experiences shape adult relationships • The difference between healthy boundaries and controlling behavior • Why people-pleasing develops as a survival strategy • How narcissists teach survivors to gaslight themselves • What self-trust actually feels like in the body • Common nervous system responses to emotional abuse • Why healthy relationships can initially feel "boring" • The importance of reconnecting with emotions and body awareness • The role of coaching versus therapy in recovery • How to recognize red flags before getting trapped in another toxic relationship • Why healing is not linear • Learning to choose yourself without guilt • The connection between abandonment wounds and toxic relationships • Why survivors deserve love exactly as they are right now One of the most powerful moments of the episode comes when Sami reminds listeners that they do not need to earn love through healing, perfection, or performance. They are worthy of love simply because they exist. If you've ever questioned your instincts, struggled with boundaries, or wondered why you keep attracting emotionally unavailable people, this episode offers practical insights and hope for recovery. Connect with Sami  Linktree iconFree resources & morelinktr.ee/samanthabachotacoaching [https://l.instagram.com/?u=https%3A%2F%2Flinktr.ee%2Fsamanthabachotacoaching%3Futm_source%3Dig%26utm_medium%3Dsocial%26utm_content%3Dlink_in_bio%26fbclid%3DPAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQPOTM2NjE5NzQzMzkyNDU5AAGnnuLempjyE9iCH8GFJOAtjHIotV-FgpSgZsVki2wp65Tqw5FiKPZCKH619RQ_aem_YWdncwDoX4qEgYtpX4ecGkAgNPm-%26brid%3DYWdncwH8tenyC577OzctxY0LaF2U&e=AUD3IZKSMbqPZ6qjSXyhJNeuRkqcVnnRIjiNoZAgyudBo4Uy441Q37YNr2oGIDA4KrLmpGIu2msDDw-dLFKPmY0m6nXK0_RX03yCzdDlEO_22PD1-Dsh9Q-t6iIdQkOkdWcUR3Znr0Dk8Y0r-PjzVI2O5Y0a] https://www.facebook.com/samibachota?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio [https://www.facebook.com/samibachota?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio] https://www.instagram.com/informed_healing/ [https://www.instagram.com/informed_healing/] Connect with Noelani | Beyond Mommy Dearest * https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/ [https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/] * https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest [https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest] * https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/ [https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/] Resources Mentioned  • Feelings Wheel - https://canva.link/9volf8vn68ucp1g   Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/support]

Safety, Self-Abandonment, and Healing After Narcissistic Parents with Christian Van Linda

Reach out! You don't have to explain how crazy she was. We believe you!!! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/fan_mail/new] In this powerful episode, Noelani sits down with trauma recovery advocate Chris to explore what it means to heal from narcissistic parenting and reclaim a sense of self. Chris shares his personal journey from addiction recovery to becoming one of the most recognized voices discussing narcissistic parents, childhood trauma, emotional neglect, and complex PTSD online. Together they discuss: • Why narcissistic parents teach children that danger is safety and safety is danger • How emotional neglect can be just as damaging as overt abuse • The concept of "mental injuries" versus "mental illness" • Why survivors often struggle with decision-making, people-pleasing, and self-trust • How childhood trauma shows up in adult relationships • The hidden ways narcissistic parents sabotage their children • Why healthy relationships can feel "boring" to trauma survivors • The importance of community, coaching, therapy, and support groups in recovery • Learning to say no and rebuild boundaries • Parenting differently after being raised by narcissistic parents • Breaking generational cycles of trauma • The challenge of aging narcissistic parents and navigating guilt, obligation, and no-contact decisions One of the most powerful takeaways from this conversation is that healing is not about fixing the relationship with the narcissist. Healing is about repairing your relationship with yourself. Whether you're just beginning your recovery journey or have been doing the work for years, this episode offers validation, insight, and hope. Connect with Chris: * https://www.instagram.com/hype.r.vigilance [https://www.instagram.com/hype.r.vigilance] Chris on Instagram * https://tinyurl.com/bddemu7bm [https://tinyurl.com/bddemu7bm] - Chris on Cameo *  https://bit.ly/4ahfgCz [https://bit.ly/4ahfgCz] Chris’ Lint.ree Connect with Noelani | Beyond Mommy Dearest * https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/ [https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/] * https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest [https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest] * https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/ [https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/] If this episode resonates with you, please follow, rate, and share the podcast so more survivors can find this space. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/support]

When Love Hurts: Inside I Love You, My Narcissist

Reach out! You don't have to explain how crazy she was. We believe you!!! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/fan_mail/new] When Love Hurts: Inside I Love You, My Narcissist In this episode of Beyond Mommy Dearest, host Noelani Pearl Hernandez sits down with Ali and Stefanie Schmahl, the producers behind the powerful upcoming film I Love You, My Narcissist. Together, they explore the emotional complexity of loving someone whose behavior is manipulative, controlling, and deeply harmful. Allie and Stephanie share what inspired them to create the film and how their research into narcissistic dynamics led them to interview survivors and experts, including Dr. Ramani, one of the leading voices on narcissistic abuse. The film blends documentary insight with fictional storytelling to help audiences understand the patterns, confusion, and emotional impact that narcissistic relationships can create. During the conversation, they discuss the subtle warning signs of narcissistic abuse, why survivors often struggle to leave, and how manipulation, gaslighting, and power dynamics slowly erode a person’s sense of self. They also highlight why it’s important to challenge the myths surrounding survivors and recognize that narcissistic abuse can happen to anyone. This episode is a powerful reminder that survivors are not weak, that narcissistic abuse is often misunderstood, and that conversations like these help people finally put language to experiences they may have carried silently for years. Learn more about the film and upcoming release: Discount Streaming  https://tinyurl.com/Iloveyoumynarcissist [https://tinyurl.com/Iloveyoumynarcissist] Trailer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fh6bzqrhYc [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fh6bzqrhYc] Teaser https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xjCWCuualc [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6xjCWCuualc] Film Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ilymn.film [https://www.facebook.com/ilymn.film] Film Instagram https://www.instagram.com/ilymn.film/ [https://www.instagram.com/ilymn.film/] Alefcine Production Company https://alefcinepictures.com/productions/ [https://alefcinepictures.com/productions/] Alefcine Instagram https://www.instagram.com/alefcinepictures/ [https://www.instagram.com/alefcinepictures/] Alefcine Facebook https://www.facebook.com/alefcinepictures [https://www.facebook.com/alefcinepictures] Beyond Mommy Dearest https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/ [https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/] https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest [https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest] https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/ [https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/] If this episode resonates with you, please follow, rate, and share the podcast so more survivors can find this space. And remember:  You’re not crazy. You’re not imagining things. And you’re not alone. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/support]

Silence Was Survival Healing Became Her Voice - Barbara, Author of Spells for Surviving a Haunted Childhood

Reach out! You don't have to explain how crazy she was. We believe you!!! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/fan_mail/new] Silence Was Survival. Healing Became Her Voice. | Barbara, Author of Spells for Surviving a Haunted Childhood What happens when the secrets you've carried your entire life finally find their way onto the page? In this deeply moving episode of Beyond Mommy Dearest, Noelani sits down with Barbara, author of the powerful trilogy Spells for Surviving a Haunted Childhood. Through a unique blend of memoir, poetry, magical realism, and healing practices, Barbara shares how writing helped her transform childhood trauma into a pathway toward healing. Together, they discuss childhood neglect, abandonment, emotional wounds, trauma recovery, nervous system healing, parenting after trauma, and the journey from surviving to thriving. Barbara opens up about growing up with a mother who literally left her for the circus, navigating abuse, carrying family secrets, and ultimately discovering that healing doesn't mean forgetting. It means learning how to live alongside your past without letting it define your future. In This Episode * Why silence becomes a survival strategy for traumatized children * How trauma physically impacts the body and nervous system * The healing power of writing, journaling, art, and storytelling * What a "haunted childhood" really looks like * Growing up feeling unseen, unheard, and alone * The difference between surviving and healing * Learning to identify and name emotions * Parenting after trauma and breaking generational cycles * Why healing is not linear * The impact of childhood abandonment and neglect * How awareness becomes the bridge between the haunted and the healer * The importance of finding safe people * Healing from complex trauma and adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) * Why survivors need spaces where they are believed Trigger Warning This episode includes discussions of: * Childhood abuse * Sexual abuse * Emotional abuse * Childhood neglect * Suicide attempts * Trauma and PTSD/C-PTSD * Mental health challenges Please listen at your own pace and prioritize your well-being. Connect with Barbara Follow Barbara on Instagram  Buy Barabara books Book 1 - https://amzn.to/49uI4Hs [https://amzn.to/49uI4Hs] Book 2 - https://amzn.to/4fN1I5d [https://amzn.to/4fN1I5d] Book 3 - https://amzn.to/4uysW4c [https://amzn.to/4uysW4c] https://canva.link/9volf8vn68ucp1g [https://canva.link/9volf8vn68ucp1g] - Feeling Wheel  https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/03/02/387007941/take-the-ace-quiz-and-learn-what-it-does-and-doesnt-mean [https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2015/03/02/387007941/take-the-ace-quiz-and-learn-what-it-does-and-doesnt-mean] - ACEs beyondmommydearest.com [http://beyondmommydearest.com/]  https://checkout.square.site/merchant/MLVPR1DTKQG4P/checkout/IHYS6DJ4XJCQKFSKT5ROOVXH [https://checkout.square.site/merchant/MLVPR1DTKQG4P/checkout/IHYS6DJ4XJCQKFSKT5ROOVXH] - Drop in Session - $19.99 https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/ [https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/] https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest [https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest] https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/ [https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/] Why Teens May (Temporarily) Push Their Parents Away - https://www.fosteringresilience.com/article/why-teens-may-temporarily-push-their-parents-away [https://www.fosteringresilience.com/article/why-teens-may-temporarily-push-their-parents-away] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/support]

This Is Not In Your Head: The Neuroscience of Narcissistic Abuse

Reach out! You don't have to explain how crazy she was. We believe you!!! [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/fan_mail/new] This Is Not In Your Head: The Neuroscience of Narcissistic Abuse In this deeply validating and eye-opening episode, Noelani Pearl Hernandez sits down with Meghan Woods, Licensed MFT, Certified Clinical Trauma Professional II, and Certified Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician, for a powerful conversation about the long-term impact of narcissistic abuse on the brain, nervous system, body, and identity. Together, they unpack why survivors often struggle to trust themselves, how gaslighting rewires the brain, and why narcissistic abuse is so much more than “just emotional abuse.” Meghan explains how trauma bonds mimic addiction through neurochemicals like dopamine, oxytocin, cortisol, and adrenaline, leaving survivors trapped in cycles of confusion, hypervigilance, dissociation, and self-doubt. This episode explores: * Why survivors often think they are the narcissist * How narcissistic abuse impacts the nervous system * Trauma bonds and the addiction-like cycle of abuse * Hypervigilance, dissociation, doomscrolling, and nervous system shutdown * The connection between trauma, autoimmune disease, shingles, stress, and chronic illness * Why healing is not linear * The difference between talking about trauma and actually processing it * EMDR and Internal Family Systems (IFS) explained in accessible language * Why boundaries and no-contact can feel terrifying * How unresolved childhood trauma shows up in adult romantic relationships * The importance of rebuilding self-trust and listening to your gut * Healthy communication, nervous system regulation, and “take a break” techniques for couples * Why narcissistic abuse survivors are not weak, broken, or “too sensitive” “This is not in your head. This is physiological. This is neurological. This is psychological.” Whether you’re healing from a narcissistic parent, romantic partner, workplace, or high-control environment, this episode offers validation, education, and hope. Meghan Woods is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist, Certified Clinical Trauma Professional II, and Certified Narcissistic Abuse Treatment Clinician specializing in trauma recovery, EMDR, Internal Family Systems (IFS), and narcissistic abuse treatment. She is the founder of Connecting Pathways Trauma & Marriage Therapy Inc. and works with clients navigating trauma, attachment wounds, narcissistic abuse recovery, and nervous system healing. Learn more about Meghan and her work at: Connecting Pathways Trauma & Marriage Therapy Inc. [https://www.connectingpathwaysemdr.org/?utm_source=chatgpt.com] https://www.instagram.com/mwoodslmft/ [https://www.instagram.com/mwoodslmft/] Connect With Beyond Mommy Dearest Beyond Mommy Dearest  beyondmommydearest.com [http://beyondmommydearest.com/]  https://checkout.square.site/merchant/MLVPR1DTKQG4P/checkout/IHYS6DJ4XJCQKFSKT5ROOVXH [https://checkout.square.site/merchant/MLVPR1DTKQG4P/checkout/IHYS6DJ4XJCQKFSKT5ROOVXH] - Drop in Session - $19.99 https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/ [https://www.facebook.com/BeyondMommyDearest/] https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest [https://www.tiktok.com/@beyond.mommy.dearest] https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/ [https://www.instagram.com/beyondmommydearest/] Used in this episode  Noelani’s Cup - https://amzn.to/3RlHA05 [https://amzn.to/3RlHA05] Heating Pad - https://shop.madeinsantacruz.com/page7.html [https://shop.madeinsantacruz.com/page7.html] Axolotl Squishy Stress Relief Toy Glitter - https://amzn.to/4doyisK [https://amzn.to/4doyisK] If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who may need this conversation today. Healing happens in community. 💛 Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590296/support]