Debone My Toilet | America's Favorite Podcast

Debone My Toilet | America's Favorite Podcast

In “Debone My Toilet” | Episode 247 of The Black Lincoln Collective Comedy Podcast, the crew opens inside what can only be described as a “buffet of meat,” then immediately derails into questionable freestyle rapping, attachable accessories, fake swagger, and Parker trying very hard to be the least white version of himself. Fred is introduced as “the modern age Noah, the show-er, the holy roll-er,” which is somehow both accurate and deeply unnecessary. After some Harry Mack talk and the realization that freestyle rap is much harder when you are not Harry Mack, Fred brings the episode’s main disaster: his son’s toilet has been clogged for days. Like any responsible, budget-conscious dad, Fred starts with plunging. Then he buys a snake. Then he accepts the nightmare truth: the toilet has to come off. This is not Fred’s first toilet excavation. The last time, he discovered someone had flushed the spring-loaded toilet paper roll holder. This time, Parker and Allan guess deodorant, toothbrushes, Legos, and basically every object except the actual answer: two rib bones. Yes, rib bones. Fred’s son was apparently eating ribs on the toilet and flushed the evidence, creating the most disgusting barbecue crime scene in podcast history. The guys then dissect the mechanics of toilet removal, wax rings, snapped bolts, Home Depot loyalty, Lowe’s discounts, and the proper 3-2-1 method for smoked ribs. The bigger question remains: why was anyone eating ribs on the toilet? Was it secrecy? Efficiency? A meat-based bathroom ritual? No one knows, but Fred’s mother-in-law wins the segment by texting that the bones “must have hurt coming out.” The back half pivots into death etiquette and the problem with saying “RIP” for people you do not particularly like. The crew brainstorms alternatives like “Rest in Pizza,” “Rest in Hell,” and other acronyms that should probably stay off memorial posts. They also joke through political death reactions, then shift into appreciating Sam Neill, Jurassic Park, New Zealand, Australia, Kiwis, Aussies, and whether certain countries count as “white people.” It’s toilet repair, ribs, death, dinosaurs, and international confusion. Somehow, that is one episode. #blcpodcast #podcastingforthepeople #funny #podcast #greenvillesc #scpodcast #yeahthatgreenville Listen at: https://americasfavoritepodcast.com  Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/blcpodcast/ Check us out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blcpodcast/ Buy Fred and Allan Beer: https://www.patreon.com/blcworld

African Beagle | America's Favorite Podcast

* Opening — Mad Hype, No Intro: The episode begins with big energy and Fred immediately admitting he did not think of anything, which is technically honesty and possibly performance art. * Early Episode — Taco Bell as a Public Health Barrier: The guys admit Taco Bell getting expensive may be the only thing keeping them safe from themselves and several bathrooms. * Early Episode — Couples That Fart Together: Parker turns love advice into gastrointestinal policy with the idea that couples who fart together stay together. * Dog Debate — Cooper’s Big Question: Fred asks whether Cooper the beagle should get neutered, and the show briefly becomes the world’s least qualified veterinary panel. * Dog Debate — “African Beagle”: While trying to explain Cooper’s unique coloring, the phrase “African Beagle” appears, and the episode earns its name in the dumbest possible way. * Dog Debate — This Dog Won’t Hunt: Cooper’s backstory reveals that he was given up because he would not hunt, making him both adorable and professionally disappointing. * Dog Debate — The Balls Grew Back: The crew suggests Fred could pretend the dog was neutered and later claim the evidence “grew back,” which is not advice, legal or otherwise. * Social Media Segment — Facebook Is Mostly Anger: Parker explains that Facebook has become so miserable that the bots are bad, but the real people might be worse. * Social Media Segment — Reddit Scam Logic: The guys talk about getting scammed online and somehow decide it is acceptable if the scammer at least bought weed with the money. * Pool Photo Horror — Tagged Against Your Will: Fred finds out he has been tagged in shirtless pool photos, proving Facebook’s greatest crime is not bots. It is friends with cameras. #blcpodcast #podcastingforthepeople #funny #podcast #greenvillesc #scpodcast #yeahthatgreenville Listen at: https://americasfavoritepodcast.com  Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/blcpodcast/ Check us out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blcpodcast/ Buy Fred and Allan Beer: https://www.patreon.com/blcworld

Gotta Catch 'Em Y'all, BLC! | America's Favorite Podcast

In Episode 245 of The Black Lincoln Collective Comedy Podcast, the show opens with shame, confusion, and a quick debate over whether this is actually Episode 245 or 246. Parker declares the episode “the best show” in a deeply suspicious presidential voice, announces the show now has 7% more freedom, and introduces Fred with a description involving a deep squat that nobody needed but everyone now has to live with. That somehow leads into Fred’s heroic tale of home maintenance. After a cheap plastic drain snake broke off in his bathtub, Fred did what any responsible adult would do: ignored it for six months while standing in ankle-deep shower water. Eventually, he pulled out a hair clog so monstrous it gets compared to a New York rat, solving in two minutes what he had dreaded for half a year. Personal growth? Maybe. Plumbing horror? Definitely. The episode then shifts into weird requests from kids and the strange world of modern collectibles. The guys talk about trendy dumpling toys, fake rare collectibles, YouTube-fueled toy hype, and the moral gray area of “slightly opening” packages in the store to find the gold one. From there, it becomes a full-on card-collecting rant, with Pokemon cards, One Piece cards, scalpers, damaged packs, adult resellers, and the painful reality that grown men are fighting children for cardboard. Naturally, the crew lands on favorite Pokemon. Parker picks Cubone because of the deeply tragic backstory, Fred goes with Jigglypuff because he is emotionally lighter than Parker, and Allan chooses “the yellow one,” which is either Pikachu or the entire marketing department at Nintendo doing its job. The back half of the episode dives into celebrity contract riders and weird Hollywood clauses. Fred and Parker turn it into a guessing game, covering Dwayne Johnson’s alleged no-losing-fights rule, Danny Trejo’s commitment to making sure criminal characters face consequences, and Sarah Jessica Parker’s wardrobe clause. It’s pop culture, nostalgia, celebrity nonsense, and three grown men asking the hard questions nobody asked them to answer. #blcpodcast #podcastingforthepeople #funny #podcast #greenvillesc #scpodcast #yeahthatgreenville Listen at: https://americasfavoritepodcast.com  Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/blcpodcast/ Check us out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blcpodcast/ Buy Fred and Allan Beer: https://www.patreon.com/blcworld

250 Episodes of Freedom | America's Favorite Podcast

In “The 250th Episode” | Episode 244 of The Black Lincoln Collective Comedy Podcast, the crew celebrates the week of America’s 250th birthday by proudly naming their 244th episode “The 250th Episode,” because math has never been part of the brand promise. The show opens with the usual BLC ceremony: a little confusion, some Johnny Carson nostalgia, Allan being introduced from a legally safe distance, and an attempted national anthem moment that gets shut down almost immediately. Parker explains that this episode is tied to America’s big 250th anniversary, or season, or whatever it is when a country has been running too long and still somehow has not been canceled. To honor the occasion, Fred brings what he calls “250 four facts” about things that happened on July 4th. The facts begin with the obvious one — America declaring independence in 1776 — before moving into the Erie Canal beginning construction in 1817. Fred explains the canal with just enough confidence to sound educational and just enough uncertainty to remind everyone this is not PBS. Next up is Walt Whitman publishing Leaves of Grass in 1855, which leads the crew into a confused discussion about whether Walt Whitman was connected to chocolate samplers, poetry, or possibly national boredom. Fred even reads part of a Whitman poem, and Allan reacts like a man watching a hostage situation unfold in verse. The historical tour continues with Shaka Zulu, the British, the Battle of Ulundi, and a few deeply American misunderstandings about non-American history. Then Fred covers the first Trans-Pacific telegraph cable, which somehow becomes a Teddy Roosevelt joke almost immediately. To round things out, Fred adds NASA’s Pathfinder Rover landing on Mars on July 4, 1997, while Parker remembers getting “fat white guy wasted,” which feels historically important in its own way. Then the episode reaches peak patriotism when Abraham Lincoln himself appears to deliver a BLC-style Gettysburg Address about podcasts, farts, freedom, and stinky bananas. It is emotional, ridiculous, and exactly the kind of presidential moment this country deserves. #blcpodcast #podcastingforthepeople #funny #podcast #greenvillesc #scpodcast #yeahthatgreenville Listen at: https://americasfavoritepodcast.com  Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/blcpodcast/ Check us out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blcpodcast/ Buy Fred and Allan Beer: https://www.patreon.com/blcworld

Trolling For Trout | The Black Lincoln Collective Comedy Podcast

* 00:01:40 — Manual Farts Only: A listener thinks the fart is part of the intro, and the crew proudly explains that BLC uses real, handcrafted gas like podcast artisans. * 00:02:12 — Pride Month Musical Parker: Parker starts singing the show open, and the guys immediately question how a man who hates musicals keeps turning the podcast into one. * 00:03:24 — Congratulations on Your Marriage, Sorry: The crew congratulates a listener on getting married, then immediately explains that 100% of divorces are caused by marriage. Romance is alive and filing paperwork. * 00:04:01 — Not a Math Podcast: After absolutely butchering percentages, the crew reminds everyone that BLC is not accounting-related. Finally, a disclaimer that feels legally useful. * 00:04:45 — Shirtless Men on the White House Lawn: The Freedom 250 becomes America’s newest summer tradition: patriotic MMA, fighter jets, and watching grappling from the darkness. * 00:06:13 — Kid Rock’s Dream America: Fred describes the event’s flyover energy as something between Top Gun, Kid Rock, Cobra Kai, and Idiocracy, which is either a warning or a campaign slogan. * 00:11:34 — Sports Worm Reports Live: Sports Worm arrives from “Mexico,” insists he is an American worm, and immediately starts making World Cup predictions like someone who found soccer in a cereal box. * 00:13:46 — Zamunda Wins the World Cup: Sports Worm picks Zamunda, then Wakanda, proving he may understand fictional geography better than actual soccer. * 00:17:39 — USA by Default: Parker picks the United States because of America, while Fred backs Argentina and Messi with slightly more actual sports logic. * 00:19:03 — Satan’s World Cup Analysis: Satan predicts a U.S. win because the deals have already been made, which is probably still better than most betting podcasts. #blcpodcast #podcastingforthepeople #funny #podcast #greenvillesc #scpodcast #yeahthatgreenville Listen at: https://americasfavoritepodcast.com  Follow us on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/blcpodcast/ Check us out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blcpodcast/ Buy Fred and Allan Beer: https://www.patreon.com/blcworld