A Wave Hit Me. 15 Min Later, My Dad Was Gone | Simon Verhoeven

A Wave Hit Me. 15 Min Later, My Dad Was Gone | Simon Verhoeven

What happens when you finally win the award you spent your whole life chasing — and it gives you nothing?In this episode of The Midlife Remix, Steven Miyao sits down with Simon Verhoeven — one of Germany's most successful film directors, son of Senta Berger and the late Michael Verhoeven, and the filmmaker behind the acclaimed, award-honored tragicomedy Ach, diese Lücke, diese entsetzliche Lücke (Die Lücke). But this conversation has nothing to do with making movies. Simon and Steven have been friends for more than 50 years — their families go back generations, and they were photographed together as babies in the same backyard.Both men recently lost their fathers. Both have mothers in their eighties. In a rare, unguarded talk, they explore what it means to suddenly become "the adult" in the family, why external success no longer brings satisfaction, and the difference between chasing validation and finding it within yourself. Simon shares the surreal moment a "wave of warmth" washed over him on a film set — fifteen minutes before he learned his father had died — and why he believes the void grief leaves behind shouldn't be closed, but carried.Along the way: how to find stillness in a world built to prevent it, how to care for aging parents without trying to "fix" their pain, and what we hope to pass on to our children — independent thinking, presence, and the courage to keep saying hello even as we learn to say goodbye.Host: Steven Miyao — The Midlife RemixGuest: Simon Verhoeven — award-winning German filmmaker and director (Die Lücke)—Für unsere deutschsprachigen Zuschauer: In dieser Folge spricht Steven Miyao mit Regisseur Simon Verhoeven (Ach, diese Lücke, diese entsetzliche Lücke) — über Trauer, das Erwachsenwerden mit 50, den Tod seines Vaters und warum man die Lücke, die ein geliebter Mensch hinterlässt, nicht schließen, sondern in sich tragen sollte. Ein seltenes, sehr persönliches Gespräch zwischen zwei Freunden seit über 50 Jahren.CHAPTERS00:00 — A Wave, and a Goodbye (cold open)00:58 — Meet Simon: 50 Years of Friendship02:58 — The Fire to Make Films05:54 — When "Making It" Feels Like Nothing09:26 — Internal vs. External Validation12:02 — The Void You're Not Supposed to Close15:35 — The Wave on the Film Set18:31 — Finding Stillness in a Noisy World22:05 — Caring for Our Aging Mothers31:27 — What We Pass On to Our Children#SimonVerhoeven #DieLücke #Grief #MidlifeJourney #MidlifeRemix #StevenMiyao #SentaBerger #agingparents

Daddy, You Just Fly in Planes and Swear at People

What if the resume everyone wants — Harvard, Vanguard, Bank of America — was the one you needed to walk away from?In this episode of The Midlife Remix, Steven Miyao sits down with his friend and former business partner Mike Ma, founder of Sidecut Ventures, a pre-seed fund built on a thesis most VCs would call upside down: advice before capital, mission before AUM, impact before optics.Mike left a senior role at Bank of America after his son delivered the line every midlife professional secretly dreads: "Daddy, I think you just fly in planes and swear at people." What followed was a complete remix — of work, identity, fatherhood, and what it means to honor the sacrifices of immigrant parents while writing your own story.They talk about the privilege of risk, the paradox of a partner who says "sell it all," investing in companies like Hapware (a wearable that helps blind people feel facial expressions), and why grinding at the kitchen table at 6 a.m. is the legacy Mike actually wants his kids to inherit.If you've ever wondered whether you're building the life you wanted — or just becoming very good at building the one you were supposed to want — this conversation is for you.CHAPTERS & TIMESTAMPS00:00 — "You finally became the person you said you'd never be"01:52 — The Harvard / Bank of America resume he's "faking" through04:28 — Clipping coupons in Cleveland: the immigrant kid mindset07:04 — Death, luck, and making your own way12:02 — "Daddy, you just fly in planes and swear at people"13:01 — Raising a fund when 99 out of 100 say no15:17 — Hapware: helping the blind feel a smile19:14 — Twice as good, half the credit24:26 — What his kids are actually learning from watching him32:32 — Two things every midlife listener should start doing now#MidlifeRemix #StevenMiyao #SidecutVentures #MikeMa #VentureCapital #ImpactInvesting #MidlifeReinvention #PurposeDrivenLeadership

Quitting the "Corporate Heroin": A 30-Year Wall Street Veteran Finds His Superpower

What happens when a 28-year Wall Street career ends in a two-week exit, your parents pass within five months of each other, and your second marriage ends — all in the same season of life? In this episode of The Midlife Remix, Steven Miyao sits down with Joel Hempel, founder of Fernweh Guided Expeditions, who spent 30+ years in financial services helping grow a firm from $200 million to over $22 billion. After what Joel calls "the disruption," he made the radical choice not to run back into the fire of finance. Instead, he built a business taking small groups of strangers into wild places — the Adirondacks, the Black Rock Desert, the backcountry — where real conversations happen around the campfire, not the conference room table. This is a conversation about what it costs to play a role you didn't write, the faith it takes to walk away, the difference between what you're good at and your actual superpower, and Joel's hard-earned acronym for navigating the unknown: IAWO — It All Works Out. If you're standing at the edge of your own midlife transition — or thinking about one — this one's for you. Learn more about Joel's work: https://fernwehguidedexpeditions.com/ [https://fernwehguidedexpeditions.com/] Chapters & Timestamps 00:00 — The Disruption That Changed Everything00:56 — Meet Joel Hempel: From Wall Street to Wilderness03:11 — What the Corporate Ladder Rewards (and What It Costs)05:23 — The Decision Not to Run Back Into the Fire06:30 — "What's Your Superpower?" The Question That Reframed Everything08:54 — The Power of Now and IAWO (It All Works Out)13:55 — Good At vs. Superpower: The Critical Distinction14:45 — How Fernweh Guided Expeditions Was Born17:27 — Trust, Vulnerability, and Real Conversations Around the Campfire22:14 — Three Things to Start Today If You're in Transition #MidlifeTransition #CareerChange #Reinvention #PersonalGrowth #FindYourPurpose #SecondAct #MidlifeRemix #StevenMiyao #JoelHempel

The Executive Recruiter's Secret to Getting the Job (and the Life) You Want

You walk into the room prepared. You've practiced your answers. You know your numbers. And somehow, before you even open your mouth, the people across the table have already decided. Erin Collins has spent over a decade as a founding partner at HCA, an executive recruiting and talent advisory firm in asset management, watching exactly that play out — over and over. In this episode of Midlife Remix, she sits down with Steven to unpack what's actually happening in those rooms, why two equally qualified executives can walk away with wildly different outcomes, and how the energy you carry in is doing more talking than your résumé. Erin grew up in a chaotic, hypervigilant environment, then adopted three special-needs children while building her business and designing a house — all at once. She knows what it feels like to operate from "more, more, more." And she knows what it took to stop. In this conversation:– Why faith is the only real antidote to fear– The white butterfly story that changed how she trusts the universe– "What do you control — what you get, or what you bring?"– Why an intention is not a wish (and the difference is everything)– How saying no became the most respectful thing she does– The morning practice that lets her run her day before her day runs her If you've been pushing harder and getting less — this one's for you. Subscribe for new Midlife Remix episodes Chapters 0:00 The cost of hypervigilance2:08 Three kids, a business, a house3:57 More, more, more5:24 Pressure vs. possibility7:36 Letting go of control8:43 When the door closes10:11 The white butterflies13:16 Life happens for you14:43 Energy enters first16:36 Intention vs. wish22:08 Saying no26:51 Run your day #ConsciousLeadership #IntentionalLiving #findingajob #interviewskills #LeadershipMindset #MidlifeRemix #StevenMiyao #ErinCollins

It's My Turn: Why High Performers Keep Getting Passed Over

Brittanni Hendricks — coach, author of It's My Turn, and founder of her own coaching practice — joins Steven to unpack why high performers keep getting passed over, even when the work is strong. Brittanni built her coaching practice because she lived the story: a biracial woman who spent years code-switching, straightening her hair, and suppressing who she was just to feel accepted — at home, in rooms, and in her career.In this conversation, we go beneath the vague feedback ("be more strategic," "increase your visibility") to the real issue: what happens when you stop performing and start telling the truth about who you are and what you want. Brittanni shares her four-part coaching framework — clarity, courage, and the work of emotional integrity — and explains why ADHD, once a source of shame, became her superpower. We also talk about the "magnet effect" of authenticity: when you stop shrinking, the right people show up, and the wrong ones quietly fall away.If you've ever wondered when is it going to be my turn? — this one is for you.Chapters00:00 Cold Open01:16 Meet Brittanni01:44 Over-Functioning at Work02:28 Why Not Me?04:44 Code-Switching Early07:13 Biracial Identity08:22 Vague Feedback Trap09:50 ADHD as Superpower10:40 Relationships Over Grind13:53 Light Up the Room14:10 The Four-Part Framework16:18 What People Fear Most18:31 Two Things to Start Today#codeswitching #ItsMyTurn #HighPerformers #AuthenticLeadership #ImposterSyndrome #ExecutiveCoaching #MidlifeRemix #StevenMiyao #BrittanniHendricks