Loving What Can't Leave You - AI Companions, Attachment Hunger, and the Body We Are Forgetting : Episode 20

Glass Skin - Cosmeticorexia, Looksmaxxing and the Face We're Really Looking For : Episode 21

🎧 Episode 21: Glass Skin - Cosmeticorexia, Looksmaxxing, and the Face We're Really Looking For Why are children as young as eight becoming obsessed with perfect skin? And what are we really looking for when we can't stop trying to improve our faces? In this episode of Mind the Body, I explore the emerging phenomena of cosmeticorexia and looksmaxxing through the lenses of psychoanalysis, attachment theory, and body image. Building on last week's discussion of glass skin as the aesthetic of the screen, I examine how AI-generated beauty ideals are reshaping our relationship with our own faces, and why the pursuit of perfection often reflects much older emotional wounds. Drawing on the work of Alessandra Lemma, Donald Winnicott, contemporary research on body dysmorphic disorder, and my own BTA Triangle framework (Body Image, Trauma, and Attachment), I explore why body image struggles are rarely just about appearance. Instead, they often reveal our deepest longing to feel seen, accepted, and loved. Ultimately, this episode asks what happens when the mirror becomes a place of endless self-surveillance rather than self-recognition, and why healing begins not by changing the face, but by changing the relationship we have with ourselves and with others. In This Episode: * Why glass skin has become the beauty ideal of the AI age * What cosmeticorexia and looksmaxxing reveal about attachment, trauma, and belonging * How AI-generated beauty standards are reshaping body image * The role of Winnicott's "mother as mirror" and Lemma's work on body dysmorphic disorder * Why our wish to perfect the face is often a longing to be truly seen * How secure relationships - not cosmetic perfection - offer the possibility of healing A Question to Sit With: When you look in the mirror, are you searching for a better face - or for the experience of feeling seen, accepted, and loved? References: BBC News. (2026). Cosmeticorexia: How girls are falling down a skincare rabbit hole. [https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cx212x41evwo] De Souza, R. (2026, May 27). Interview on Peston. ITV. King, V., Gerisch, B., & Schreiber, J. (2020). "...to really have everything completely perfect": On the psychodynamics of contemporary forms of body optimization. Psychoanalytic Psychology, 37(2), 148–157. Lemma, A. (2009). Being seen or being watched? A psychoanalytic perspective on body dysmorphia. International Journal of Psychoanalysis, 90(4), 753–771. Vuaran, Y. (2024, November 26). Looksmaxxing and neurodiversity: A psychodynamic perspective [https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/looksmaxxing-neurodiversity-psychodynamic-perspective-yvette-vuaran-um0pe/?trackingId=KBvlG9oMTl%2BRLDvP8Oy9YQ%3D%3D]. LinkedIn. Winnicott, D. W. (1971). Playing and Reality. Routledge. Take a breath, stay curious, and explore what it truly means to Mind The Body. Join the Community * Subscribe or follow the show so you never miss an episode. * Share this episode with a friend who’s exploring body image healing, the mind–body connection, emotional healing, and the patterns that shape how we see ourselves. * Connect or learn more: www.yvettevuaran.com [http://www.yvettevuaran.com/]  * Sign up for my Mind The Body Newsletter [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/signup-52d63cef-7882-4aaa-8e09-aae41281f6e0] * Follow @mindthebodypodcast [https://www.instagram.com/mindthebodypodcast/] @yvettevuaran [https://www.instagram.com/yvettevuaran/]

Loving What Can't Leave You - AI Companions, Attachment Hunger, and the Body We Are Forgetting : Episode 20

🎧 Episode 20: Loving What Can't Leave You - AI Companions, Attachment Hunger, and the Body We Are Forgetting What happens when the thing that understands you best has no body of its own? In this episode of Mind the Body, I explore the growing phenomenon of AI companionship through the lenses of attachment theory, psychoanalytic thinking, and body image. Beginning with attachment hunger and limerence, I examine why AI relationships can feel so compelling, why they offer relief from some of the deepest anxieties of human connection, and what may be lost when intimacy becomes increasingly detached from the body. Drawing on the film Her, alongside the work of Donald Winnicott, Alessandra Lemma, Todd Essig, and contemporary conversations led by Esther Perel, I consider what AI companionship reveals about our longing to be known, our discomfort with vulnerability, and our cultural desire to transcend the limitations of being human.  Ultimately, this episode asks what becomes of love, grief, and healing when connection no longer requires the risks of embodied relationship. In This Episode: * Why AI companionship speaks so powerfully to attachment hunger * What the film Her reveals about intimacy, grief, and the longing to be understood * The fantasy of connection without vulnerability, loss, or bodily presence * How grief, mourning, and real healing require human limitation * Why embodied relationships remain essential to love and connection A Question to Sit With: What parts of being human - vulnerable, dependent, imperfect, embodied - might we risk losing if we begin to prefer connection that asks nothing of us in return? References: Amodei, D. (2026, May 19, 2026). The co-founders of Claude AI tell Oprah about the impact artificial intelligence has on your life. The Oprah Podcast. Essig, T. (2025). Psychoanalytic AI activism: Creatively and critically engaging the future. The American Psychoanalyst, 59 (1), 18–23. Jonze, S. (Director). (2013). Her [Film]. Annapurna Pictures. Lemma, A. (2026). Psychotechnical Becomings: Psychoanalysis, Identity, Desire, and Mourning in the Age of AI and Digital Mediation. Routledge. Perel, E. (2026, May 26, 2026). Oprah and renowned psychotherapist Esther Perel on what we really want in a relationship. The Oprah Podcast. Winnicott, D. W. (1953). Transitional objects and transitional phenomena: A study of the first not-me possession. International Journal of Psycho-Analysis, 34, 89–97. Take a breath, stay curious, and explore what it truly means to Mind The Body. Join the Community * Subscribe or follow the show so you never miss an episode. * Share this episode with a friend who’s exploring body image healing, the mind–body connection, emotional healing, and the patterns that shape how we see ourselves. * Connect or learn more: www.yvettevuaran.com [http://www.yvettevuaran.com/]  * Sign up for my Mind The Body Newsletter [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/signup-52d63cef-7882-4aaa-8e09-aae41281f6e0] * Follow @mindthebodypodcast [https://www.instagram.com/mindthebodypodcast/] @yvettevuaran [https://www.instagram.com/yvettevuaran/]

Limerence, Attachment and the Other We Create : Episode 19

🎧 Episode 19: Limerence, Attachment, and the Other We Create What happens when longing becomes more real than the person it is attached to? In this episode of Mind the Body, I explore the psychology of limerence - the intense, consuming experience of longing for another person who often remains emotionally unavailable, uncertain, or just out of reach. Drawing on attachment theory, psychoanalytic thinking, and Tennyson's The Lady of Shalott, I examine why limerence can feel so powerful, why it is rarely about the other person alone. Together, we explore how early attachment experiences shape our expectations of love, how the mind constructs an internal version of the other, and why healing requires more than understanding. Beneath limerence lies something deeper: grief, longing, and the possibility of creating a new experience of connection. In This Episode: * What limerence is and why it can feel so consuming * How attachment patterns shape romantic longing * The internal world we create around the people we desire * Why insight alone cannot resolve limerence * The relationship between longing, grief, and healing * What it means to turn from fantasy toward reality A Question to Sit With: What might my longing be trying to tell me about the kind of love, care, or recognition I needed long before this person appeared? References: Chefetz, R., Soffer-Dudek, N., & Somer, E. (2023). When Daydreaming Becomes Maladaptive: Phenomenological and Psychoanalytic Perspectives. Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy, 37, 319–338. Sperling, M. B. (1988). Phenomenology and Developmental Origins of Desperate Love. Psychoanalysis and Contemporary Thought, 11(4), 741–761. Tennov, D. (1979). Love and Limerence: The Experience of Being in Love. Stein and Day. Verhulst, J. (1984). Limerence: Notes on the Nature and Function of Passionate Love. Psychoanalysis and Contemporary Thought, 7(1), 115–138. Winnicott, D. W. (1974). Fear of Breakdown. International Review of Psycho-Analysis, 1, 103–107. Take a breath, stay curious, and explore what it truly means to Mind The Body. Join the Community * Subscribe or follow the show so you never miss an episode. * Share this episode with a friend who’s exploring body image healing, the mind–body connection, emotional healing, and the patterns that shape how we see ourselves. * Connect or learn more: www.yvettevuaran.com [http://www.yvettevuaran.com/]  * Sign up for my Mind The Body Newsletter [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/signup-52d63cef-7882-4aaa-8e09-aae41281f6e0] * Follow @mindthebodypodcast [https://www.instagram.com/mindthebodypodcast/] @yvettevuaran [https://www.instagram.com/yvettevuaran/]

The Body We Are Leaving Behind - AI, the Machine Gaze, and the Foreclosure of Mourning : Episode 18

🎧 Episode 18: The Body We Are Leaving Behind - AI, the Machine Gaze, and the Foreclosure of Mourning What happens when technology begins to shape not only how we think, but how we experience our bodies? In this episode of Mind the Body, I explore how AI and algorithmic environments are transforming our relationship with embodiment, identity, and emotional life. Drawing on psychoanalytic theory, contemporary reflections on artificial intelligence, and my work as a psychotherapist, I examine how the machine gaze is reshaping self-perception, how AI-generated ideals can distance us from lived experience, and why mourning remains central to psychological growth. As technology increasingly promises optimisation, certainty, and escape from discomfort, I ask what may be lost when we become disconnected from the realities of being human: vulnerability, dependency, and mortality. In This Episode: * How AI is changing our relationship with the body * The impact of the machine gaze on self-image * Why digital ideals can distance us from lived experience * Mourning and psychological development * What therapy offers that AI cannot * Why healing remains an embodied process A Question to Sit With: What aspects of being fully human - vulnerable, embodied, and mortal - am I being encouraged to move away from, and what might it mean to return to them? References: Ammaniti, M. (2018). Implicit Knowledge from Infancy to the Psychotherapeutic Relationship. Psychoanalytic Inquiry, 38(2). Levy, A. (2026). The New Other: Alien Intelligence and the Innovation Drive. Karnac. Lemma, A. (2017). The Digital Age on the Couch: Psychoanalytic Practice and New Media. Routledge. Lemma, A. (2026). Psychotechnical Becomings: Psychoanalysis, Identity, Desire, and Mourning in the Age of AI and Digital Mediation. Routledge. Vuaran, Y. (2025). The Future of Therapy: Human Connection in the Age of AI. https://www.yvettevuaran.com/blog/the-future-of-therapy-human-connection-in-the-age-of-ai [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/blog/the-future-of-therapy-human-connection-in-the-age-of-ai] Winnicott, D. W. (1960). Ego Distortion in Terms of True and False Self. In The Maturational Processes and the Facilitating Environment. Hogarth Press. Take a breath, stay curious, and explore what it truly means to Mind The Body. Join the Community * Subscribe or follow the show so you never miss an episode. * Share this episode with a friend who’s exploring body image healing, the mind–body connection, emotional healing, and the patterns that shape how we see ourselves. * Connect or learn more: www.yvettevuaran.com [http://www.yvettevuaran.com/]  * Sign up for my Mind The Body Newsletter [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/signup-52d63cef-7882-4aaa-8e09-aae41281f6e0] * Follow @mindthebodypodcast [https://www.instagram.com/mindthebodypodcast/] @yvettevuaran [https://www.instagram.com/yvettevuaran/]

Invited In - AI, Attachment, and Emotional Truth : Episode 17

🎧 Episode 17: Invited In - AI, Attachment, and Emotional Truth What happens when we begin turning to AI for emotional reassurance, certainty, and answers that once belonged to human relationships? In this episode of Mind the Body, I explore AI through the lens of attachment and psychoanalytic thinking. As more people use AI to process conflict, loneliness, self-doubt, and relational pain, I examine what may be lost when emotional complexity is replaced with immediate interpretation and certainty. I explore how AI can soothe discomfort while also bypassing the vulnerability, ambiguity, and mutuality required for genuine healing. In This Episode: * AI through the lens of attachment and psychoanalytic thought * Why our capacity to stay with uncertainty matters for emotional growth * How AI is designed to reduce ambiguity and provide reassurance * The difference between validation and emotional truth * How AI may reinforce emotional avoidance and relational self-protection * Why healing still depends on embodied human connection A Question to Sit With: What emotional uncertainty am I trying to escape when I seek immediate answers or reassurance from AI? References: Hendrix, H. (2020). Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples (Revised Edition). Simon & Schuster UK. Levy, A. (2026). The New Other: Alien Intelligence and the Innovation Drive. Karnac. Levy, A. & Orbach, S. (2026). Amy Levy and Susie Orbach Discuss AI in Psychoanalysis [YouTube interview].  https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6KygDzwzrJ8&pp=0gcJCU8Co7VqN5tD&ra=m [https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6KygDzwzrJ8&pp=0gcJCU8Co7VqN5tD&ra=m] Lemma, A. (2026). Psychotechnical Becomings: Psychoanalysis, Identity, Desire, and Mourning in the Age of AI and Digital Mediation. Routledge. Project Hail Mary (2026 film). Vuaran, Y. (2025). The Future of Therapy: Human Connection in the Age of AI. [Blog post] https://www.yvettevuaran.com/blog/the-future-of-therapy-human-connection-in-the-age-of-ai [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/blog/the-future-of-therapy-human-connection-in-the-age-of-ai] Take a breath, stay curious, and explore what it truly means to Mind The Body. Join the Community * Subscribe or follow the show so you never miss an episode. * Share this episode with a friend who’s exploring body image healing, the mind–body connection, emotional healing, and the patterns that shape how we see ourselves. * Connect or learn more: www.yvettevuaran.com [http://www.yvettevuaran.com/]  * Sign up for my Mind The Body Newsletter [https://www.yvettevuaran.com/signup-52d63cef-7882-4aaa-8e09-aae41281f6e0] * Follow @mindthebodypodcast [https://www.instagram.com/mindthebodypodcast/] @yvettevuaran [https://www.instagram.com/yvettevuaran/]