Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will

When you first take the Strengths Finder quiz, we often feel like those skills and talents are what you can use to guide and influence others, however if we forget to take time for ourselves, to turn our talents inward and focus on ourselves, we are failing ourselves by not acknowledging what we bring to the table.   In today's episode Sarah Elkins and Lindsey Van Gorp discuss the importance of introspection, fostering and growing our strengths, as well as how we need to wield our talents and skills in order to be the best version of ourselves, not just for others but for ourselves so that we may feel fulfilled in our lives.    Highlights * Have you ever done anything out of character for the sake of someone else? * Are you direct in your communication or do you soften the edges of your words? * Recognizing the innate strengths in everyone and how that builds community when you’re aware of it. * Do you use your talents solely for those around you or are you using them more introspectively to best show up for yourself? Quotes “Clear is kind, I think that’s a thing I’m trying to learn and use more effectively. Because you’re right, I have these strengths that make me a happy, sometimes soft person when it comes to my communication, and I’m learning to remind myself that it’s actually far more kind to the person I’m communicating with if I am direct and clear in my communication instead of softening the edges of what I’m trying to get at.” “Once you’re aware of it, you see it everywhere.” “I think mine is a combination of all of mine, I looked at the strengths as how they impact others; Like how does this show up for everyone around me? And I had spent less time thinking about how do they show up for myself? And even just that mindset shift of it’s not always about how you can influence or impact those around you through them, but how am I using them towards myself?”   Dear Listeners it is now your turn, Even without using a tool or assessment like Strengths Finder, what questions can you ask people around you, the ones you clearly think differently from, what questions can you ask to get to the heart of why they do what they do and how they do it. Because when you can understand the language, you don’t need to change who you are but you do need to learn a little bit of how to speak it.  And, as always, thank you for listening.    About Lindsey Lindsey Van Gorp is the Brand Experience Manager at Vermeer Heartland, focusing her time and attention on enhancing the employee and customer experience. She has a passion for people and seeing them reach their full potential by recognizing their natural gifts and abilities. Be sure to check out Lindsey’s LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/lindseyvangorp/], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/lindsey.jacobsen1], and Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/lindseyjvg/]! As well as Vermeer Heartland [https://www.vermeerhl.com/]!   About Sarah "Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision." In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with. My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home. The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available! Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana. Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course [https://sarah-elkins.mykajabi.com/offers/F2WN65Xg/checkout] as well to make sure you nail that next interview!

396 Curiosity and Authenticity   It is in human nature to be curious, to ask questions, and seek out insight in an attempt to make sense of the world we are thrust into. It is when we craft our own personal board of directors do we get the opportunity to finally seek the answers we crave and in doing so find our own purpose. In today’s episode Sarah Elkins and Cole Mannix discuss how curiosity led them to find their authentic selves as well as the many paths their hunger for answers took them on.    Highlights * Curiosity and the questions it makes us ask often shape how we grow, even if we don’t see where it’s taking us at first. * Drawing in voices from all over can lead to new perspectives and new questions as well as answers. * Although our path can change throughout life, our mission will always remain the same.    Quotes “What you serve really matters.” “What can I give my life to? What is worth the limited time, y’know we all have a limited time, and life no matter what, no matter how rich it is will involve plenty of suffering, and if you decide what’s suffering for and what’s worth giving yourself over to, sometimes it’s multiple things.” “How does the way we do business together allow for flourishing or not.”   Dear Listeners it is now your turn, What have you been thinking about during this conversation, did anything in particular remind you of something that happened that helped you understand your purpose, your mission, where you can serve. I’d be really curious to hear if something came up for you, if you’ve developed any kind of clarity around what you want to do next to contribute, to bring your version of reciprocity to your environment and your community. I’d love to hear from you.  And, as always, thank you for listening.    About Cole Cole is part of an extended family that has ranched together since 1882 near Helmville, MT. He did an undergrad in biology, another in philosophy at Carroll College, then a masters in theology at Boston College. From ‘12-’16 he worked for a startup beef company called Salt of the Earth Ranchers Cooperative. From ’17-’20 he worked for Western Landowners Alliance to advance policies and practices that sustain working lands, connected landscapes, and native species. As a co-founder and President of Old Salt Co-op, he is helping to build a regenerative marketplace for fine American meat. He and spouse Eileen Brennan live in Helena with two sons, Finn and Charlie. Be sure to check out Cole’s LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/cole-mannix-7a9354220/], Old Salt [https://www.oldsaltco-op.com/], and The Union [https://theunionhelena.com/]!   About Sarah "Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision." In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with. My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home. The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available! Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana. Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course [https://sarah-elkins.mykajabi.com/offers/F2WN65Xg/checkout] as well to make sure you nail that next interview!

395 Carpe Diem    It’s easy to think we have all the time in the world to do something we’re putting off. Whether it’s changing jobs, or finishing your novel, or finally folding the laundry, we always think we’ll have more time. However time is a finite resource, and one day it too will run out. So we carry with us reminders of that which matters most to us and in doing so we remind ourselves to seize the day and to not take time for granted. In today’s episode Sarah Elkins and George Schunk discuss their own collections of sentimental items, their own art they have dedicated themselves to, as well as how important it is to act on an opportunity instead of waiting for the perfect time.    Highlights * What are you holding on to that means a great deal to you? * What is something you read or wrote that you still think about? * Are you doing something because you want to? Is the story you tell about it fair to the other people involved in it? * Those stories matter, and not just to you. * Don’t wait for the perfect time to do something. Make it the perfect time and do it anyway. * What are the themes of your stories that everyone can relate to, even if the words for those themes have changed?   Quotes “Before I started to write about my life, I started to wonder; was I fair to the women that I loved?” “What did you start with and what did you end with?” “When something came up that I wanted to do, I went and did it.” “When you’re unemployed, when you’re taking those gap years, or let’s say you have a good job and you’re moving up from your corner office, everything is looking good whether it’s public service or private. But if for any reason you get the wild hair that there’s a wild, larger world out there and you need that, and you go on a mid-life walk about -I did this when I was 45, for 2 years-  The benefits of something like that are enormous.”   Dear Listeners it is now your turn, First, I highly recommend Michael Easter’s book, The Comfort Crisis [https://eastermichael.com/book/], and in the future I promise to update you when George’s book is finally released. Who knows when that will be but I’m sure it will be well worth the wait. And now I’m going to ask you the hard question; What is something that you want to accomplish? What is something that you want to do in your life that you haven’t yet done? That you can take a step today, tomorrow, the next day, toward that idea that you’ve been thinking about for years. Don’t wait, we’re not guaranteed tomorrow. Make sure that people in your life know that those relationships are meaningful. Tell them, and take that step. And, as always, thank you for listening.    Mentioned in this podcast  Chip Clawson [https://www.chipclawson.com/about] The Comfort Crisis [https://eastermichael.com/book/]   About George Born into the privilege of good education and stable family life, got educated on my own, nine-years post-secondary. Lots of gap years along the way. I managed to change some laws for the better, access to public lands, closing mines significant to Native populations, managing timber sustainably, etc. I worked for President Clinton, Pew Charitable Trusts and Ecotrust, a green think tank in Portland. Now I snowboard half the year at the Great Divide and explore the country of Colombia. I have finished the first draft of a memoir that I want to edit and publish. Check out George’s Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/george.schunk] and LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/george-schunk-0569503/]!    About Sarah "Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision." In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with. My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home. The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available! Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana. Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course [https://sarah-elkins.mykajabi.com/offers/F2WN65Xg/checkout] as well to make sure you nail that next interview!

394 The Driver of Innovation is Curiosity   Curiosity is in our nature as human beings, we crave knowledge and the answers to the how’s and why’s. Whether it be from a scientific standpoint, raising a child, or to work more cohesively with our coworkers, we must always stay curious so that we can always be growing.  In this episode Sarah Elkins and Jeff Ikler discuss not just their vital work, but how they have maintained healthy relationships, and a positive mental state by always staying curious.    Highlights * Avoiding the after conference hangover by having a support team to further your ideas and goals. * Taking something you deem important and holding onto it while using it as the foundation for something meaningful to be built. * You can’t please everyone, so cast a smaller net, tend to your audience. * How are you furthering yourself either with academic education or social education? * Walk away with at least one idea, even if you need to come up with it yourself or seek it out. Be intentional about what you choose to remember. * Let people get comfortable and feel safe before taking a risk. * What do you carry that reminds you of those who have shaped you?   Quotes “I have to narrow it down to what’s one really good thing I can remember about this? Otherwise, for me, it can become overwhelming.” “If you stand for everything, you stand for nothing,” “Shoot with a rifle, not with a shotgun.” “Glaciers move faster than changes in education.” “The driver of innovation is curiosity.” Dear Listeners it is now your turn, Sarah: going to have Jeff ask you a few questions but first I’m going to ask you a couple questions. When you think about the stories that you tell, do they demonstrate your curiosity? Do they demonstrate your motivation or your ambition to learn and to grow as a human being? What is one story that you can point to that you can craft and develop, that is three minutes or shorter, that you know people will understand what matters to you and how you lead. I’d love to hear from you. Jeff, what are your conclusions for our listeners? Jeff: So what I’m curious about is what came up for people as you and I were talking, because my hope, because this is like when we’re talking about the reflection part of the podcast, I want people to be wanting to walk away with something.  So what’s the take away? What’s something that impacted you as Sarah and I were talking about how we go about doing our work, how we’re thinking about our work, and how it impacts on the work you’re doing.      And, as always, thank you for listening.   Mentioned in this podcast Lisa Weiss, The Object Diaries [https://www.objectdiaries.com/] Neil Hughes Podcast [https://techblogwriter.co.uk/podcast/amp/], LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/neilchughes/]   About Jeff Jeff Ikler is Director of Quetico Career and Leadership Coaching, a firm dedicated to helping individuals overcome career issues and develop sustained changes in their leadership practices and organizations. He received his certificate in coaching from the Coach Training Institute. He is a certified innovation facilitator using the SIT (Systematic Inventive Thinking) process. Jeff holds a Master’s in the Teaching of History along with a Bachelor’s in History from the University of Illinois. He taught high school history in Maywood and Batavia, Illinois, for seven years. He is a former Executive Vice President at Pearson Learning where he directed the development of text- and technology-based products for all disciplines. Jeff is a co-author of Shifting: How School Leaders Can Create a Culture of Change. He is the host the “Getting Unstuck – Cultivating Curiosity [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/getting-unstuck-cultivating-curiosity/id1439952788]” podcast. Supporting the agency of others is the river that has run through his entire career. Be sure to check out Jeff’s Substack [https://jeffikler.substack.com/], LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeffikler/] as well as Quetico Coaching and Consulting [https://www.queticocoaching.com/about-jeff-ikler]!   About Sarah "Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision." In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with. My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home. The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available! Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana. Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course [https://sarah-elkins.mykajabi.com/offers/F2WN65Xg/checkout] as well to make sure you nail that next interview!

393 Being Direct and Intentional in Conversations   It can be far too easy to let yourself be passive in conversations, whether it be to let another person make a decision or to avoid conflict. However in doing so we rob ourselves and others of deep meaningful connection, which is why it is so important to be direct and intentional with your words. In today’s episode Sarah Elkins talks about these points while also bringing up times in her life where she was passive and direct in conversation, and why it is so important to her to be direct and intentional.   Highlights * Be direct and honest with your words, don’t leave room for doubt or miscommunication.  * Don’t leave a conversation completely up to one person. Communication goes both ways. * Being intentional in conversation, as well as understanding and compassionate.   Quotes “I realized a lot of miscommunication and unintended injury happens when we’re passive in our language.” “I also remembered a few people from my past who were especially difficult, insulting, and actually cruel in their communication with me. I thought about how I interacted with them – things I could have handled differently - for the purpose of learning, not regret, and thoughts about”   Dear Listeners it is now your turn, I encourage you to listen to last week’s short episode and then try using a less passive voice in your communication. What will you do differently so you can move past injury and grow into better, safer, more satisfying relationships? And, as always, thank you for listening.  About Sarah "Uncovering the right stories for the right audiences so executives, leaders, public speakers, and job seekers can clearly and actively demonstrate their character, values, and vision." In my work with coaching clients, I guide people to improve their communication using storytelling as the foundation of our work together. What I’ve realized over years of coaching and podcasting is that the majority of people don’t realize the impact of the stories they share - on their internal messages, and on the people they’re sharing them with. My work with leaders and people who aspire to be leaders follows a similar path to the interviews on my podcast, uncovering pivotal moments in their lives and learning how to share them to connect more authentically with others, to make their presentations and speaking more engaging, to reveal patterns that have kept them stuck or moved them forward, and to improve their relationships at work and at home. The audiobook, Your Stories Don’t Define You, How You Tell Them Will is now available! Included with your purchase are two bonus tracks, songs recorded by Sarah's band, Spare Change, in her living room in Montana. Be sure to check out the Storytelling For Professionals Course [https://sarah-elkins.mykajabi.com/offers/F2WN65Xg/checkout] as well to make sure you nail that next interview!