3 Lies Keeping You Stuck (And Exactly What to Say Back)

3 Lies Keeping You Stuck (And Exactly What to Say Back)

There is a voice in your head that has been talking you out of your own life for a long time. And what makes it so dangerous is not that it sounds harsh or cruel, it sounds like wisdom, responsibility and the realistic version of you. But it is lying to you. In this episode, I am giving you the exact words to say back. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE: We are taking on three lies, the ones that sound the most reasonable, the most self-aware, and the most responsible and squashing every single one of them. Then I am handing you two scripts for each: one for when the voice shows up in your own head, and one for when someone you love says it out loud. Lie #1 "I've tried things before and nothing ever creates lasting change for someone like me." This lie uses your own history as evidence against you. We are going to look at what that evidence actually proves — and it is not what the voice has been telling you. Lie #2 "I don't even know who I am anymore. I wouldn't even know where to start." This one sounds like honest self-awareness. It is the quietest lie and the most damaging. And the truth underneath it changes everything about when you are allowed to begin. Lie #3  "My circumstances just won't allow it right now." The most sophisticated lie of the three, because it is built entirely from real, true, legitimate facts about your life. Here is what it does with all of that real information — and why it has been costing you more than you realize. Plus, before we get to the lies, we are talking about the guilt that sits underneath all three of them. Because for most ambitious mothers, these lies are not just intellectual beliefs. They are guilt management strategies. And that needs to be addressed first. THE SIX SCRIPTS — GET THEM HERE: All six word-for-word scripts from today's episode are on a free cheat sheet at yourutmost.com/56. One page. Yours to keep. Go grab them while you listen.  YOUR ONE THING THIS WEEK: Pick the lie that has had the most power over you. Not the most familiar, the one that has cost you the most. Go back to that script. Say it out loud. Wherever you are right now. The lie has had the floor long enough. READY TO GO DEEPER? When you are ready to do this work with someone walking alongside you rather than doing it alone in your car, come spend an hour with me.  Wednesday's at 11:00 AM Central, I host a free live session where we do the honest inventory together, get clarity on who you actually are beyond your roles, and leave with real momentum already in motion. Reserve your seat: yourutmost.com/identityreset [https://yourutmost.com/identityreset] CONNECT + SUBSCRIBE If this episode met you where you are, share it with one woman who needs to hear it and subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next. You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone. If this episode met you somewhere real, tell me where. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2451418/fan_mail/new] ✨ What's Your Superpower? In 90 seconds, discover your identity superpower and the 3 moves to feel like yourself again this week. → Take the Identity Reset quiz [https://yourutmost.com/quiz/]. (Less than 90 seconds. More clarity than you've had in years.) 📲 Connect + Continue: If this episode moved something in you, I want to hear about it. Screenshot it, share it, send it to the woman in your life who needs to hear "You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone"! 🎧 Subscribe so you never miss the episode that was made for exactly where you are right now. 🔗 I show up daily on Instagram for the honest, unfiltered conversations this journey actually requires. Come find me: @yourutmostself [https://www.instagram.com/yourutmostself/] 🧭 When you're ready for the next step, everything you need is waiting at Your Utmost Self [https://yourutmostself.com/].

She Almost Missed Her Own Life (And She's Not the Only One)

Have you ever looked up from a life that looks full, good marriage, kids you love, work that matters, and felt completely hollow? Like you're doing all the things but missing yourself somewhere inside all of it? That is what we are talking about today. She was a researcher who spent a decade studying wholehearted living and realized one day she was not living a single thing on her own list. What happened next changed everything and it maps exactly onto what I see happen for every ambitious woman who finally decides she's done going quiet. We walk through three turning points that brought her back to herself. Honest inventory. Intentional design. Showing up and living there. And I'm going to show you why those same three phases are exactly what stands between where you are right now and the life that actually feels like yours. If you have been running on empty, going through the motions, and carrying that 2am question, whether this is really all there is, this episode is your answer. INSIDE THE EPISODE * Why feeling lost is an invitation, and what that actually means for where you are right now. * What the Identity Eraser Effect is, how it happened to you without you even noticing, and why it is not your fault. * The three phases every woman walks through on her way back to herself and which one you're probably stuck in right now. * Why awareness alone is never enough, and what has to come after it for anything to actually change. * What it looks like to live in your own rhythm again, not in a dramatic, life-blowing-up way, but on an ordinary Tuesday that finally feels like yours. NEXT STEP RESOURCE Put you back into your life and feel like you again. Free live workshop, Become You Again: Your 60-Minute Identity Reset. Held on Wednesday’s, at 11am Central. This is where we do this work together in real time. Come with your questions, come with your honest inventory, and leave with a plan. Register here: yourutmost.com/identityreset Start immediately with the Identity Reset Starter Pack; a free resource to finding yourself again in 7-minutes at yourutmost.com/starterpack If this episode cracked something open for you, send to a woman who needs to hear it. You already know who she is. You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone. If this episode met you somewhere real, tell me where. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2451418/fan_mail/new] ✨ What's Your Superpower? In 90 seconds, discover your identity superpower and the 3 moves to feel like yourself again this week. → Take the Identity Reset quiz [https://yourutmost.com/quiz/]. (Less than 90 seconds. More clarity than you've had in years.) 📲 Connect + Continue: If this episode moved something in you, I want to hear about it. Screenshot it, share it, send it to the woman in your life who needs to hear "You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone"! 🎧 Subscribe so you never miss the episode that was made for exactly where you are right now. 🔗 I show up daily on Instagram for the honest, unfiltered conversations this journey actually requires. Come find me: @yourutmostself [https://www.instagram.com/yourutmostself/] 🧭 When you're ready for the next step, everything you need is waiting at Your Utmost Self [https://yourutmostself.com/].

The Real Reason You Keep Starting Over Every Monday (Why Your Week Falls Apart)

If you start strong on Monday and by Thursday you don't recognize what happened to the week, this episode is for you. Not because something is wrong with you. Because nobody ever helped you build a week that was actually designed around your life, your identity, and your season. In this episode, you will learn why momentum is not a feeling; it is a structure. You will discover the two tools that change everything about how your week works: your weekly rhythm and your DUE, your Dedicated Utmost Execution. And you will walk away with three questions to identify your DUE and two protected blocks on your calendar before the week claims them. "Who you are determines what you design. What you design determines what you create." What You'll Learn in This Episode * Why your systems keep collapsing, and why it has nothing to do with your discipline * The three things an unstructured week is actually costing you, and why the third one hurts most * What a weekly rhythm actually is and what your anchors are * What DUE stands for, Dedicated Utmost Execution, and why it is both how you show up and what you produce * Three questions to identify your DUE right now * What a designed Tuesday actually feels like, and why you are allowed to want it The Question That Changed Everything "I stopped asking how I feel today? and I started asking what my life needs today, and who do I need to be to show up for it?" The Anchor Sentence Who you are determines what you design. What you design determines what you create. Your DUE — Dedicated Utmost Execution D — Dedicated. Decided in advance and consistently. Even when it is hard. U — Utmost. Your highest standard. Determined by who you actually are, not someone else's definition of excellent. E — Executed. It Exists. The fruit. Something real you actually produced, pursued with your greatest effort and full intention. Three Questions to Find Your DUE 1. What is the one thing that if I did not do it this week, nothing else would meaningfully move forward? 2. What is the thing I keep saying I will get to, and keep not getting to? 3. What would Friday feel like if I had done just this one thing consistently, with dedication and my utmost standard? The answer that shows up across all three is your DUE. Your Action This Week Two things. Not someday. This week. First, name your DUE. Write it down. Say it out loud. Make it real and make it yours. Second, find two protected blocks in your week where that DUE gets done. Not hoped for. Protected. On the calendar. Decided. Free Resource Mentioned The DUE + Rhythm Planning Sheet — one page, five minutes. Name your DUE and lock in your rhythm anchors today. → yourutmost.com/54 [http://www.yourutmost.com/54] If this episode met you somewhere real, tell me where. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2451418/fan_mail/new] ✨ What's Your Superpower? In 90 seconds, discover your identity superpower and the 3 moves to feel like yourself again this week. → Take the Identity Reset quiz [https://yourutmost.com/quiz/]. (Less than 90 seconds. More clarity than you've had in years.) 📲 Connect + Continue: If this episode moved something in you, I want to hear about it. Screenshot it, share it, send it to the woman in your life who needs to hear "You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone"! 🎧 Subscribe so you never miss the episode that was made for exactly where you are right now. 🔗 I show up daily on Instagram for the honest, unfiltered conversations this journey actually requires. Come find me: @yourutmostself [https://www.instagram.com/yourutmostself/] 🧭 When you're ready for the next step, everything you need is waiting at Your Utmost Self [https://yourutmostself.com/].

Choose the One (What It's Really Costing You to Have No Goal of Your Own)

You have been managing everything for everyone. And somewhere in the process, your one thing, the goal that's just yours, has been sitting at the bottom of a list that never comes. One clear decision can pull you out of the fog faster than another year of trying to do everything. When you stop and choose one bold goal with a real timeline, something shifts inside you first: you stop waking up to dread and start waking up with direction. This episode is for the woman who feels behind, stretched thin, and quietly haunted by the question, What about me? You'll learn why choosing one goal is not a productivity trick, it's an identity act. When everything is urgent, nothing moves, and the cost isn't just a missed achievement. It's scattered energy, hamster-wheel exhaustion, and the slow way you can lose the thread of yourself while managing everyone else's needs. You'll also hear about the Identity Eraser Effect, what happens when your wants get so quiet you can't hear them anymore, and why clarity doesn't come before you choose. Clarity comes from choosing. Then we get practical. If past goals collapsed the moment real life got loud, it's usually a structure problem, not a discipline problem. You'll see what it looks like to build a protected rhythm, even if all you have is 15 minutes, and how that small slot becomes the through line that changes your whole week. You'll leave with three simple filters for picking your 12-week goal: it must be specific with a clear definition of done, it must be yours, and it must be protected on your calendar. This is about what it's really costing you to keep living without one. And what becomes available the moment you choose it. In this episode: * Why the absence of one goal doesn't just mean a missed achievement, it means a missed version of you * What goallessness actually feels like in the body (and why it's not a discipline problem) * The three things your goal has to have to be the right one * Why your family doesn't lose you when you choose yourself; they get more of you * Misty's story: the season she had no goal of her own, what it cost her, and the moment everything shifted The Three Things Your Goal Has to Have: 1. Specific: a clear finish line with needle-movers attached. If you can't describe what done looks like, it's not ready yet. 2. Yours: not the goal that sounds right in conversation. The one that makes something in you lean forward when you think about it quietly. 3. Protected: a specific day, a specific time, non-negotiable. The slot is the structure that holds everything else up. Your next step: Write your one goal right now. One sentence. Specific. Yours. Twelve-week deadline. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs her spark back, and leave a rating and review so more women can find this work. If this episode met you somewhere real, tell me where. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2451418/fan_mail/new] ✨ What's Your Superpower? In 90 seconds, discover your identity superpower and the 3 moves to feel like yourself again this week. → Take the Identity Reset quiz [https://yourutmost.com/quiz/]. (Less than 90 seconds. More clarity than you've had in years.) 📲 Connect + Continue: If this episode moved something in you, I want to hear about it. Screenshot it, share it, send it to the woman in your life who needs to hear "You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone"! 🎧 Subscribe so you never miss the episode that was made for exactly where you are right now. 🔗 I show up daily on Instagram for the honest, unfiltered conversations this journey actually requires. Come find me: @yourutmostself [https://www.instagram.com/yourutmostself/] 🧭 When you're ready for the next step, everything you need is waiting at Your Utmost Self [https://yourutmostself.com/].

"Someday When Things Calm Down" Is Not a Plan. It's a Practice.

You've been telling yourself it's the circumstances. The kids still need you. Your husband leans on you. Your parents are aging into needing you too. The money is real. The exhaustion is real. The calendar is genuinely full. You are not wrong about any of that. But here is the thing nobody has said to you clearly enough yet: the circumstances are the facts. The story you're telling about what those facts mean about you, that is something else entirely. And that story is the reason you haven't started. Not the circumstances. In this episode we are separating those two things. And once you can see the difference, the wall you've been up against dissolves. DISCOVER: * The real reason you keep waiting for the right time, and why the right time is never coming * Why the women who seem to be figuring it out don't have easier circumstances, they have a different frame * The specific belief underneath "my life is too complicated" that nobody talks about, and why it's been running the show without you knowing it * Why every attempt that didn't stick wasn't evidence of failure, it was evidence you were working at the wrong level * The difference between the facts of your life and the story you've been attaching to them,  and why only one of those things is changeable right now * What "I am not capable" actually sounds like when it's disguised as "my circumstances aren't right" * The Identity Eraser Effect, and how quiet muscles get mistaken for lost ones * A decision Misty made, twice, twenty years apart, that finally proved what was actually standing in her way * Why identity does not follow circumstances and what to do before the circumstances cooperate * The one decision available to you today, in this exact life, that changes everything KEY TAKEAWAY You are not waiting for the right circumstances. You have been waiting for permission to believe you are capable. The circumstances were never the obstacle. The frame was. And the frame — unlike the circumstances — is yours to change right now. CLOSING IDENTITY ANCHOR You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone.* Take the journey back to you. You're worth it. If this episode met you somewhere real, tell me where. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2451418/fan_mail/new] ✨ What's Your Superpower? In 90 seconds, discover your identity superpower and the 3 moves to feel like yourself again this week. → Take the Identity Reset quiz [https://yourutmost.com/quiz/]. (Less than 90 seconds. More clarity than you've had in years.) 📲 Connect + Continue: If this episode moved something in you, I want to hear about it. Screenshot it, share it, send it to the woman in your life who needs to hear "You are more than everyone's everything. You are someone"! 🎧 Subscribe so you never miss the episode that was made for exactly where you are right now. 🔗 I show up daily on Instagram for the honest, unfiltered conversations this journey actually requires. Come find me: @yourutmostself [https://www.instagram.com/yourutmostself/] 🧭 When you're ready for the next step, everything you need is waiting at Your Utmost Self [https://yourutmostself.com/].