Conversations That Heal
Stop Self-Abandonment: How I Learned to Set Boundaries, Trust Myself, and Say No | Dr. Stephanie Jeffreys In this episode, I talk about self-abandonment as a coping mechanism I learned from being taught to play small and believe that my voice didn’t matter. I walk through what that has looked like in my own life, saying yes when I really wanted to say no, staying in draining relationships, prioritizing everyone else’s needs, and consistently showing up for people who didn’t reciprocate. Somewhere along the way, I lost trust in myself. I share how my experiences are valid, but they don’t have to define my entire story. I’ve learned to start paying attention to my body, what it’s telling me when something doesn’t feel right, and to get honest about why I say yes when I really want to say no. I’m learning to honor my preferences without feeling the need to justify them. I also walk through practical steps that have helped me rebuild trust with myself: following through on what matters to me, setting small boundaries, and beginning to say no to anything that doesn’t value or honor me. Because I’ve realized that self-abandonment doesn’t just go away, it turns into resentment and leaves me feeling taken for granted. I invite you into a seven-day exercise I’ve practiced, where you begin to track the “yeses” you want to change and slowly start choosing yourself. And as always, I close with a prayer—for healing, for growth, and for the courage to finally stop abandoning yourself.
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