Understanding Your Stress Defaults: Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn & Fit In

Understanding Your Stress Defaults: Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn & Fit In

In this episode of Designed to Thrive with Dr. Brooke, Dr. Brooke explores how the nervous system responds when life feels like more than the body can adapt to in the moment. Through the lens of Polyvagal Theory, she breaks down the autonomic nervous system, the sympathetic and parasympathetic responses, and why stress is more nuanced than simply “fight or flight.” You’ll learn about the stress defaults of fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and fitting in — and how recognizing your own patterns can create more compassion, self-awareness, and healing. Dr. Brooke also shares a vulnerable reflection about how understanding the fawn and fit-in responses helped her release shame around a past experience and meet her body with more grace. This episode is an invitation to understand your body’s protective responses, build more nervous system capacity, and remember that you are designed to thrive. A gentle note before listening: This episode includes mention of sexual rupture and a non-graphic reference to rape/sexual coercion. Please listen with care and honor what feels supportive for your nervous system. CHAPTERS 00:00 — Understanding Stress and the Nervous System Why stress responses are not simply mindset issues, but nervous system patterns. 06:40 — Polyvagal Theory Explained A simple breakdown of the autonomic nervous system using the gas pedal and brake pedal analogy. 13:48 — Responses to Stress: Fawning and Fitting In How stress can show up as people-pleasing, blending in, or saying yes when something inside you wants to say no. 17:48 — Healing Through Awareness and Embodiment How understanding your nervous system defaults can bring compassion, release shame, and support deeper healing. KEY TOPICS Polyvagal Theory and stress The autonomic nervous system Fight, flight, freeze, fawn, and fit in Why fawning can look like saying yes when your body is signaling no Recognizing your default stress patterns Releasing shame through nervous system understanding Building capacity to return to safety, neutrality, and ease SOUND BITES “Stress responses are nuanced and individual.” “Sometimes we say yes outwardly when something inside of us is saying no.” “Your nervous system is not betraying you — it is trying to protect you.” “You are designed to thrive.” RESOURCE MENTIONED Call of the Wild: How We Heal Trauma, Awaken Our Own Power, and Use It for Good by Kimberly Ann Johnson Dr. Brooke mentions learning more about Polyvagal Theory and the nervous system through Kimberly Ann Johnson’s work, especially her book Call of the Wild, which explores trauma healing, nervous system resilience, embodiment, sexuality, boundaries, and reclaiming personal power through the wisdom of the body. Amazon link: https://www.amazon.com/Call-Wild-Kimberly-Ann-Johnson/dp/0062970909 [https://www.amazon.com/Call-Wild-Kimberly-Ann-Johnson/dp/0062970909] KEYWORDS nervous system, Polyvagal Theory, stress response, fight or flight, freeze response, fawn response, fitting in, embodiment, trauma healing, chiropractic care, women’s healing, Designed to Thrive CONNECT WITH DR. BROOKE Website: https://thrivewithdrbrooke.com [https://thrivewithdrbrooke.com] Email: drbrooke@thrivewithdrbrooke.com [drbrooke@thrivewithdrbrooke.com]

The 4 Gifts of the Menstrual Cycle: Learning to Live in Rhythm

In this episode, Dr. Brooke opens the door to the wisdom of cyclical living and shares how learning to understand her menstrual cycle completely changed the way she related to her body, her emotions, her energy, and even her work as a business owner. After noticing a monthly pattern of anxiety, self-doubt, and the urge to “burn everything to the ground,” Dr. Brooke began to recognize that her body was speaking through a rhythm she had never been taught to truly honor. What started as curiosity led her into a deeper understanding of the menstrual cycle — not just as a biological process, but as a God-designed rhythm filled with wisdom. Rather than turning cyclical living into another list of rules, this conversation invites women to see each phase of the cycle as an inner season with its own gifts: * Menstruation as inner winter — a time to rest, reflect, and release. * The follicular phase as inner spring — a time for renewal, fresh energy, and beginning again. * Ovulation as inner summer — a time for expression, connection, and allowing yourself to be seen. * The luteal phase as inner autumn — a time for discernment, truth-telling, completion, and refinement. Dr. Brooke also speaks to women who are not currently bleeding — whether because of pregnancy, birth control, hysterectomy, perimenopause, menopause, or irregular cycles — reminding them that cyclical wisdom is still available and deeply valuable. This episode is an invitation to stop overriding your body and begin honoring the wisdom woven into your design. You are not meant to live in one energy all month long. You are designed to live in rhythm. You are designed to thrive. IN THIS EPISODE Dr. Brooke shares: * The monthly pattern that first helped her recognize her cycle’s emotional wisdom * Why cyclical living is not meant to become another checklist * How the menstrual cycle mirrors the rhythms of nature * The four inner seasons of the cycle * How to honor your body whether you currently bleed or not * Why the luteal phase may be one of the most misunderstood gifts of the cycle * How each cycle can become an upward spiral of growth, release, renewal, and deeper self-trust RECOMMENDED BOOKS FOR EXPLORING CYCLICAL LIVING If this episode sparked your curiosity and you want to learn more about cyclical living, menstrual cycle wisdom, and honoring your body’s rhythms, here are a few books I recommend exploring: * Do Less by Kate Northrup * In the FLO by Alisa Vitti * Wild Power by Alexandra Pope and Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer * Period Repair Manual by Lara Briden * Period Power by Maisie Hill * Code Red by Lisa Lister If this conversation stirred something in you and you’d love to learn more about honoring your body’s cyclical design, stay connected. Dr. Brooke will be sharing more soon about an upcoming masterclass on cyclical living and the wisdom of your body’s natural rhythms. And if this episode spoke to you, share it with a woman in your life who needs the reminder that her body is not something to override — it is something to listen to.

Lessons from My Thyroid Cancer Journey | Part 5: Finding the Gift in the Pain

What if the experience you’ve labeled as only painful, difficult, or “bad” also carried hidden gifts that shaped who you are becoming? In this episode of Designed to Thrive with Dr. Brooke, Dr. Brooke continues sharing lessons from her thyroid cancer healing journey and opens a deeper conversation around perception, emotional healing, and nervous system transformation. Through personal stories of divorce, resentment, faith, motherhood, and healing after cancer, she explores the powerful idea that every life experience has two sides: benefits and drawbacks, pain and purpose, challenge and growth. Dr. Brooke shares how learning to see both sides of painful experiences helped her release stored emotions like guilt, shame, and resentment — and how that emotional shift created a profound change not only in her mind, but also in her body. This episode is an invitation to look at your own life with new eyes. Not to bypass the hard things. Not to pretend pain didn’t happen. But to begin asking: Where did this shape me? Where did it strengthen me? Where did it bring me closer to who I am today? Because healing is not always about fixing what happened. Sometimes, it’s about finding the place inside you where the story finally softens. You’re not broken. You’re becoming. And you are Designed to Thrive!

Lessons from My Thyroid Cancer Journey | Part 4: Moving Beyond the “Why Me?” in Healing

When you’re facing a diagnosis, chronic symptoms, or a healing crisis, it’s natural to ask, “Why did this happen to me?” In this episode of Designed to Thrive with Dr. Brooke, Dr. Brooke continues her series on the lessons she learned through her thyroid cancer healing journey. She shares how her own search for “the reason” opened the door to a deeper understanding of the body, the nervous system, and the many layers that can contribute to dysfunction. Through the lens of chiropractic and nervous system health, Dr. Brooke explores the three T’s — thoughts, traumas, and toxins — and how mental, emotional, physical, and chemical stress can all shape the way the body expresses health or imbalance. This conversation is an invitation to move beyond blame, fear, or endless searching for one single root cause, and instead begin asking: What next? What is my body trying to show me? How can this become a catalyst for who I’m meant to become? Your body isn’t broken. It may be speaking. And healing begins when we learn how to listen.

Done is Better than Perfect

What if perfectionism isn’t helping you do better… but quietly keeping you stuck? In this episode of Designed to Thrive with Dr. Brooke, we’re talking about the powerful reminder that done is better than perfect — and why taking messy, imperfect action is often the very thing that creates clarity, confidence, and momentum. Dr. Brooke shares how this lesson has shaped her own life, from growing up with perfectionistic tendencies to launching this podcast and learning to take action before everything feels polished or fully figured out. Through personal stories, nervous system insight, and faith-based reflection, she explores how perfectionism can show up as procrastination, over-preparation, self-doubt, comparison, and even the need to please or fit in. This episode is an invitation to stop waiting for the perfect time, the perfect words, the perfect plan, or the perfect version of yourself before you begin. Because the first version was never meant to be the final version. And when we choose progress over perfection, we give life room to move. In this episode, you’ll hear about: * Why perfectionism can delay growth, obedience, and opportunity * How the nervous system can default into fawning, fitting in, or people-pleasing * The difference between excellence and perfectionism * Why messy action builds confidence through repetition * How faith, motherhood, business, and personal growth all require us to let life be messy * What we model for our daughters when we release the need to perform perfectly If you’ve been waiting until you feel more ready, more clear, more confident, or more prepared… this episode is your gentle nudge to begin. Start before you’re ready. Let it be messy. Choose progress over the pressure to be perfect. Because you don’t have to do it flawlessly to be faithful to the next step. You are designed to thrive.