living in the dark

there was only one way to be gay

Spending his teen years in West Lafayette, Indiana, Jason had no openly gay adult role models, and like many others, that made him turn to movies and the Internet. Jason Wang, 21, talks about white gay media, how he struggles to find his place in queer spaces as a Chinese American, and how his queerness defies the model minority myth. Things you should know: * The queer movement was largely fronted by activists of color. Read more here [https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/22/us/lgbtq-minorities-trans-activists.html]. * Read how British colonialism instituted widespread homophobic laws via Section 377 here [https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-57606847]. Funded by Northwestern University’s Office of Undergraduate Research Hosted, written, recorded, and produced by Lily Shen Audio edited, cleaned, and mixed by Chloe Koser Music by Lily Shen and Chloe Koser

living in the dark

Growing up in Fort Wayne, Indiana, Saloni struggled to reconcile their queer, Black, and Filipino identities, a struggle that was exacerbated by racism and homophobia in their Catholic school system.  Saloni Dixon, 21, talks about the lack of education around race, gender, and sexuality in their environments and how that affected their upbringing.  Things you should know: * In 2019, 40% of Black high school graduates in Indiana earned AP or dual credit [https://www.in.gov/che/college-equity-reports/], compared to a statewide average of 63%. * Former students reported racist bullying at both Carmel High School [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2022/apr/06/black-student-indiana-white-district-critical-race-theory-crt] and Westfield Washington Schools [https://www.indystar.com/story/news/2021/11/04/former-westfield-washington-student-sues-district-over-racist-bullying/6281732001/] in Indiana, among others. * Some of Indiana’s Catholic schools, such as Roncalli High School [https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2023/07/14/guidance-counselor-shelly-fitzgerald-roncalli-lgbtq-rights/70413879007/] and Cathedral High School [https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/24/us/cathedral-hs-teacher-gay-marriage.html], have recently been brought into the limelight for firing LGBTQ+ staff. Funded by Northwestern University’s Office of Undergraduate Research Hosted, written, recorded, and produced by Lily Shen Audio edited, cleaned, and mixed by Chloe Koser Music by Lily Shen and Chloe Koser

maybe i could be gay?

Rain didn’t realize she was lesbian until college, and she hasn’t come out yet to her parents.  Rain Lee, 22, talks about chasing male validation, how she finally realized she was gay, and how she tries to educate her immigrant mom. Things you should know: * Although China decriminalized gay sex in 1997, the government has recently cracked down [https://www.nbcnews.com/news/world/china-beijing-lgbt-center-rcna85528] on LGBTQ+ expression. Funded by Northwestern University’s Office of Undergraduate Research Hosted, written, recorded, and produced by Lily Shen Audio edited, cleaned, and mixed by Chloe Koser Music by Lily Shen and Chloe Koser

so much that would drive people away, even i question why i stay

*CLARIFICATION* HEA 1608 restricts teaching “human sexuality” in pre-K to grade 3 schools. As the child of a Presbyterian pastor, S.J. didn’t realize their own queerness until an older age.  S.J. Espiritu, 20, talks about their experience growing up as a pastor’s kid and one of the only brown kids in town, how they came out as bisexual and genderqueer, and their ongoing relationship with their faith. Things you should know: * The 2022 census [https://www.census.gov/quickfacts/fact/table/newcastlecityindiana/PST045222] found that S.J.’s hometown of New Castle, Indiana is almost 93% white and only 0.5% Asian American. * S.J.'s father was the pastor of a PC(USA) church, which has allowed same-sex marriage on a church-by-church basis since 2015 [https://www.nytimes.com/2015/03/18/us/presbyterians-give-final-approval-for-same-sex-marriage.html]. In contrast, as of now, PC(A) does not allow same-sex marriage. Funded by Northwestern University’s Office of Undergraduate Research Hosted, written, recorded, and by Lily Shen Audio edited, cleaned, and mixed by Chloe Koser Music by Lily Shen and Chloe Koser

they're not bad people, they're just ignorant

Abigail was adopted from Jiangxi, China and grew up in South Bend, Indiana, with her mom, who is white, and her dad, who is Black.  Abigail Trawick, 19, talks about her unique family, the racism she experienced at home and in school, and why conversations surrounding identity can be so difficult.  Things you should know: * There are an estimated 200,000 adoptees [https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/adopt_ref/adoption-statistics-esri.html?wcmmode=disabled] from Asian countries in the U.S. Funded by Northwestern University’s Office of Undergraduate Research Hosted, written, recorded, and produced by Lily Shen Audio edited, cleaned, and mixed by Chloe Koser Music by Lily Shen and Chloe Koser