We’re Not in a Dating Slump. We’re in a Civilizational One.

We’re Not in a Dating Slump. We’re in a Civilizational One.

We're Not in a Dating Slump. We're in a Civilizational One. | Matchmaker Madigan on Commitmentism, the Bid, and Rebuilding Marriage Catholic marriages have collapsed 69% in the last fifty years. The U.S. fertility rate just hit the lowest point in American history. 80% of Gen Z reports feeling lonely. And by Match Group's own 2026 admission, an entire generation is paralyzed by what they're calling a "readiness paradox", they want commitment, they can't move. This week on Fulfillment Project, I sit down with Matchmaker Madigan, founder of Commitmentism, a Catholic-only matchmaking service running at double the male engagement of the matchmaking industry average. We unpack why dating apps function like gambling for men, how conversational chemistry beats the algorithm, and the asymmetry between male and female "bids" for attention that makes or breaks every marriage on earth. If you think this is a dating episode, you're missing it. This is a leadership episode. A family episode. A who-rebuilds-the-church-and-the-culture episode. Quotable Moments "We've built an Amazon culture. Then we wonder why romance feels like a return policy." "Common interests aren't actually a good indicator of whether or not you're going to be married." "If a woman makes more money than you, you need to stop ruling her out." "The die-to-self is that you don't want to do them when you're tired or angry. But the bids constantly exist. If you honor them, you have a healthy marriage." "Women's bids have more to do with emotional connection than they do the topic itself." Guest Matchmaker Madigan — Founder, Commitmentism 🌐 commitmentism.com [http://commitmentism.com] 🌐 catholicdatingevents.com [http://catholicdatingevents.com] 💼 LinkedIn: Matchmaker Madigan Resources Mentioned The Gottman Institute — long-running research on marital "bids" for connection Arthur and Elaine Aron — 36 Questions study, Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 1997 Aristotle's three friendships — utility, pleasure/commonality, and virtue/values Match Group 2026 Annual Report — the "readiness paradox" Love Is Blind and Married at First Sight — inspiration for conversation-first matchmaking More of a Man — Madigan's husband's upcoming work on Catholic masculinity Read the Companion Essay Full long-form breakdown at fulfillmentproject.substack.com [http://fulfillmentproject.substack.com] Stay Connected with The Fulfillment Project 🎙️ Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts 📧 Free Substack newsletter: fulfillmentproject.substack.com [http://fulfillmentproject.substack.com] 🎥 YouTube: The Fulfillment Project If this episode hit you, share it with one single friend and one married friend. That's how we build this thing. — Andy Leonard Get full access to Fulfillment Project at fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

The Morning She Quit a Job She Hadn’t Started Yet

What happens when the version of you that knows the truth finally overrides the version of you that's been performing? Amelia Wilson found out on November 30, 2017. The morning she called her brand-new boss at 8 a.m. and quit a job she hadn't even started yet. Amelia is the writer behind Happy On Purpose, a Substack with over 14,000 subscribers about happiness habits and how to actually thrive in midlife. Her work has been featured in Cup of Joe, Culture Study, and Modern Mrs. Darcy. She blew up her own career at 44 and found her calling on the other side — and now she helps thousands of women do the same. In this episode we cover: - Why "midlife reckoning" is the better frame than "midlife crisis" - The biggest belief Amelia held at 35 that she now thinks is dead wrong - Her 12-item happiness checklist (and which items most people skip) - Why happiness is a daily practice, not a destination - Capping news consumption — and what 40 days off actually does to your life - Parenting teens: the groundwork you have to lay in the tween years - Reinventing yourself after 40, and why you have to do it badly first - Famous people who started their big thing after 40 (the list is comically reassuring) Quote of the episode: "Happy On Purpose is the daily practice of building a meaningful, joyful life, one small decision at a time." — Amelia Wilson Find Amelia: Substack: https://ameliawilson.substack.com [

#58 Lean Out

Lean Out: Laura LeBleu on Surviving the Corporate Machine, Reclaiming Analog, and Going Back to Who You Were at 10 She's a two-time Emmy winner, former NYC theater director, lead singer of an Italian band, voice of a virtual TV character, and a stilt-walking circus ringmaster. Now she co-founded Geezer, the print-only magazine telling the truth about Gen X. Laura LeBleu came to the Fulfillment Project with no filter, pathological honesty, and one of the most useful career philosophies I've heard in years: lean out. About this episode What if everything you've been told about climbing the ladder is backwards? Laura LeBleu has had one of the strangest, most creative resumes you'll ever encounter, and somewhere between San Francisco drag queen musicals, NYC advertising agencies, and Bay Area tech companies, she figured out a quiet truth that's been hiding in plain sight: you can do excellent work without tying your soul to it. In this conversation we cover Gen X as the "forgotten generation," why print is the new vinyl, the slow death of human-curated discovery (RIP, Blockbuster clerks), what to say to the 19-year-old who's given up because of AI, the lost art of being bored, and the single best piece of career advice I've heard in a long time: lean out, but do the work. Laura also sings Italian cabaret on the mic. A Fulfillment Project first. Featured quotes "You are not the sum of your job description, and you are not the sum of your latest annual review. You're so much more than that." "I made a conscious decision to lean out, which did not mean I leaned out as far as doing good work. Where I leaned out is where my ego was concerned." "We're all realizing the empty calories of digital content. We want to touch grass, as the kids say. And the way Gen X is doing it is by picking up a magazine." "Discovery used to be built in. Now discovery is fed to us, which means it's not really discovery at all." "By leaning into our humanity, that's the best way to navigate the age of AI." "I'm in my 50s, I'm starting to feel more like myself than I have in many years." Chapters (00:00) Cold open — "You are not the sum of your job description" (00:37) Meet Laura: Emmys, circus, cabaret, and Geezer Magazine (02:46) Is Gen X really the forgotten generation? (04:01) The truth about perimenopause nobody told her (04:48) Print is the new vinyl (06:11) Why analog matters more than ever (07:38) Rebranding AARP in three words (07:56) Things from the 80s and 90s that deserve a comeback (14:01) The death of human-curated discovery (16:32) The hotel in Charlotte with a vinyl librarian (17:51) Why Gen Z struggles to talk to strangers (20:01) The centenarian secret: it's not diet, it's social connection (21:06) From theater kid to circus ringmaster: Laura's wild path (24:00) Becoming the voice of a virtual TV character at Tech TV (25:43) Laura sings Italian cabaret (yes, really) (28:43) How Geezer came to life with Paul Vons (29:32) Why Gen X may be the first generation skipped over for power (32:13) Do creatives lose pieces of themselves inside big companies? (36:39) McKinsey: most people don't find purpose in their work — why? (40:06) What do you say to the 19-year-old who's given up because of AI? (44:25) Reading and writing in the age of AI (47:02) The seven books Laura just bought to reclaim her attention (49:45) Boredom is a creative superpower (54:56) The Lean Out manifesto (1:00:38) Separating your ego from your work (1:03:48) "Deep in my heart, I'm kind of a 12-year-old boy" (1:08:29) Going back to who you were at 10 (1:09:00) Where to find Geezer Magazine About the guest Laura LeBleu is the co-founder and creative director of Geezer Magazine [https://geezermagazine.com], a print-only magazine telling the truth about Gen X and aging. Before Geezer, she earned two Emmy Awards, directed theater in New York City, fronted an Italian band performing the music of Mina, performed cabaret, voiced the virtual character hosting Tech TV, and toured as a stilt-walking circus ringmaster. She holds a theater degree from New Mexico State University and currently writes thought leadership for a major tech company. She has a 15-year-old son who, upon seeing the first issue of Geezer, declared: "Analog media is fire." Resources & references mentioned Geezer Magazine — geezermagazine.com [http://geezermagazine.com] Geezer on Substack — geezermagazine.substack.com [http://geezermagazine.substack.com] Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg — the book Laura is gently dismantling Northern Exposure — the Gen X show Laura wants resurrected Tech TV — where Laura voiced the first network virtual character Mina — the Italian singer of "Nessuno" (the song Laura sings on the episode) Connect with Laura Geezer Magazine: geezermagazine.com [http://geezermagazine.com] Geezer on Substack: geezermagazine.substack.com [http://geezermagazine.substack.com] Connect with the Fulfillment Project If this episode resonated, the best way to support the show is to share it with one person who needs to hear it — the friend stuck in a job that's eating their soul, the cousin worried about their kid's future, the colleague who keeps asking what they're doing with their life. Subscribe on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen — and please leave a rating. It's the single biggest thing you can do to help the show grow. Subscribe to the newsletter for episode breakdowns, reflections, and what's on my mind between conversations. Watch on YouTube — full episodes, clips, and Shorts. Follow along on LinkedIn for new episode drops and behind-the-scenes. Thanks for listening. — Andy Get full access to Fulfillment Project at fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

#57 | No One's Richer Than Us

Easter morning. A half-inch crack in the sidewalk. A stone wall. Six months flat on his back — and the most important lesson Jeff Matlow says he ever learned. This week on The Fulfillment Project, I sat down with Jeff Matlow: three-time founder (all acquired by publicly traded firms), Ironman triathlete, leadership coach, former music industry insider who worked closely with James Brown, and a guy who has cheated death enough times to be running out of cat lives. We covered a LOT of ground — and Jeff didn't pull any punches. ▶️ [https://www.youtube.com/@fulfillmentproject]SUBSCRIBE [https://www.youtube.com/@fulfillmentproject] so you don't miss the next one [https://www.youtube.com/@fulfillmentproject] 📬 Get the weekly deep-dive on Substack [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/] 🎙 Inside This Episode The "Surplus Life" framework that will reframe how you think about generosity, time, and wealth Why "open door policies" are complete BS — and what real leaders do instead The 6 workplace addictions quietly destroying your team (you'll spot at least one in the mirror) Why procrastination doesn't actually exist — and what you've really been wrestling with The "Pattern-Environment Loop" trapping smart leaders — and the small move that breaks it What James Brown, Reverend Al Sharpton, and a wild contract negotiation taught Jeff about authenticity Why money can't make you happy — but if you're already happy, "it sure can make you happier" The "Unconscious Operating System" running your life (and why you can't see it from inside the pickle jar) If you've ever felt stuck, behind, or like you're waiting for permission to live the life you actually want — this one's for you. ⏱ Chapters 00:00 — Cold open: three companies, Ironman, and a broken back 01:04 — Lightning round 02:21 — What lying flat on his back taught Jeff about gratitude 05:03 — Why "work-life balance" is a lie 06:25 — The #1 leadership behavior destroying fulfillment at work 07:10 — Working with James Brown 15:43 — The Reverend Al Sharpton story 17:16 — Money, fame, and the "golden prison" 19:54 — The personality chameleon trap 24:10 — How to figure out what you actually want (the 5 Whys) 27:26 — The real reason your team isn't aligned (it's not what you think) 29:34 — Why "Atomic Habits" misses the point + the 3 elements of lasting change 32:47 — Morning routines that actually work 41:31 — Why you have to make time NOW (not "someday") 43:55 — The Surplus Life framework 47:07 — The origami angels story 48:44 — Procrastination isn't real 50:38 — "Open door policies are BS" 52:41 — How to actually get honest feedback (Stop / Start / Continue) 55:52 — The 6 workplace addictions destroying productivity 1:01:10 — The Unconscious Operating System 1:03:04 — Where to find Jeff 🔗 Connect with Jeff Matlow Website: thebestleadershipcompany.com [http://thebestleadershipcompany.com] Newsletter: thebestleadershipnewsletter.com [http://thebestleadershipnewsletter.com] 🔗 Connect with Andy + The Fulfillment Project Substack: fulfillmentproject.substack.com [http://fulfillmentproject.substack.com] LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/andrewtleonard [https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrewtleonard/] Apple Podcasts: Listen here [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fulfillment-project/id1804384788] Spotify: Listen here [https://open.spotify.com/show/6709cKjw4GWkTTzbu7xPJM] ❤️ If This Resonated, Do Me a Favor Hit SUBSCRIBE — every sub helps me bring on bigger guests LIKE this video so YouTube shows it to someone who needs it Drop a COMMENT with your biggest takeaway — I read every single one SHARE this with one person you care about — that's a surplus move 😉 What's the one work addiction from Jeff's list that hit closest to home? Tell me in the comments 👇 #TheFulfillmentProject #JeffMatlow #Leadership #Fulfillment #LeadershipCoaching #PersonalDevelopment #WorkLifeBalance #Productivity #SelfImprovement #ExecutiveCoaching Get full access to Fulfillment Project at fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

#56 | The AI Age Survival Guide: Agency, Alignment, and Reinvention with Nikki Barua

Nikki Barua on how to thrive in the AI age: why curiosity beats credentials, how to use agency as your antidote to uncertainty, and the daily practice behind everything she's built. In this episode of Fulfillment Project, I sit down with Nikki Barua, serial entrepreneur, bestselling author of Beyond Barriers, keynote speaker, and CEO of Flipwork. Named one of Entrepreneur Magazine's 100 Most Influential Women and featured in Forbes, Fortune, Bloomberg, and CNBC, Nikki has spent 25 years helping leaders break through barriers, reinvent their careers, and unlock exponential human potential in the age of AI. We get into what most AI conversations miss: this isn't about technology replacing humans — it's about humans becoming more human. Nikki unpacks why burnout is misalignment (not overwork), why most people are chasing safety instead of success, and why "dreaming small" is the #1 thing keeping you stuck. If you've ever felt the rat race closing in, wondered whether your career is future-proof, or struggled to turn failure into fuel — this conversation is for you. WHAT WE COVER ➡️ Why AI is an amplifier of human potential, not a replacement ➡️ The 72-hour rule for bouncing back from setbacks ➡️ The daily "Thinking Time" practice that fueled a 25-year career ➡️ Why burnout = misalignment (not long hours) ➡️ How to find your purpose when you're stuck in a corporate job ➡️ Why curiosity trumps credentials in the AI era ➡️ How to reinvent yourself at any age or stage ⏱️ CHAPTERS ▶️ 00:00 — Intro ▶️ 02:25 — Lightning round: Is AI good or bad? ▶️ 05:23 — Agency + accountability: the antidote to uncertainty ▶️ 07:57 — What to do when taking ownership isn't producing results ▶️ 12:42 — Why women get stuck in the story (and how to break out) ▶️ 14:04 — Nikki's immigration story and finding her authentic voice ▶️ 20:54 — The "Thinking Time" daily practice ▶️ 23:40 — Turning tragedy and loss into fuel ▶️ 25:37 — Purpose vs. chasing growth for growth's sake ▶️ 28:11 — Why most people work for safety, not success ▶️ 32:00 — The biggest leadership paradox in the AI age ▶️ 38:16 — Curiosity trumps credentials ▶️ 40:28 — What fulfillment actually means in 2026 ▶️ 43:49 — Burnout vs. stress (and the real cause of burnout) ▶️ 47:08 — Why we don't dream big enough 🔗 CONNECT WITH NIKKI BARUA ➡️ Website: https://nikkibarua.com [https://nikkibarua.com] ➡️ Flipwork: https://flipwork.ai [https://flipwork.ai] ➡️ Free AI Readiness Diagnostic: https://flipwork.ai [https://flipwork.ai] 🎧 LISTEN TO FULFILLMENT PROJECT ➡️ Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6709cKjw4GWkTTzbu7xPJM [https://open.spotify.com/show/6709cKjw4GWkTTzbu7xPJM] ➡️ Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fulfillment-project/id1804384788 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/fulfillment-project/id1804384788] ➡️ Substack: https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/ [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/] 📬 GET THE FULL RECAP Every week I break down the best ideas from each episode in my Substack newsletter. Subscribe here: https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/ [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/] If this conversation hit for you, the best thing you can do is share it with one person who needs to hear it. Drop your biggest takeaway in the comments — I read every single one. #AI #Reinvention #Entrepreneurship #NikkiBarua #FulfillmentProject #Leadership #Burnout #PersonalGrowth #Mindset #CareerReinvention #AIera #PurposeDriven #Curiosity #Agency #WomenInBusiness Get full access to Fulfillment Project at fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe [https://fulfillmentproject.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]