Grief and Hope: Walking One Another Home

Grief and Hope: Walking One Another Home

Pema Chödrön wrote a book in 1996 called When Things Fall Apart. It hit me hard twice. First, in early ‘24. My marriage was ending, and I surrendered into recovery. It stopped me in my tracks again recently. I was recording this week’s interview [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/podcast] with my dear friend and book publisher Trena White. She read the passage that held her up while her world was breaking open.On the podcast, we call this the pilot light: What kept you glowing through the darkest tests in your life? Trena read the words: “Sticking with that uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic. This is the spiritual path.” Pema Chödrön Unimaginable Surrender Trena had these words pinned to her bulletin board, alongside what she calls her “Frankenstein Venn diagram” of communities: people who raised neurodivergent kids, people who understood young onset dementia, people who had walked through medically assisted death. She mapped the entire mess of her life and started reaching out, hoping someone could guide her through it. Eventually she realized no one could fully guide her. It was up to her. She had to go inward in a way she had never accessed before. Meanwhile, she kept building her award-winning publishing business, Page Two. She kept showing up for her co-founder Jesse, for her authors, for a leadership team in rapid-growth. She kept showing up for two boys who needed her to be the strongest version of herself she had ever been. Her husband Andre made a sacred decision. If the diagnosis was dementia, he would choose MAID, Canada’s medical assistance in dying program. He was a social worker. He had seen what end-stage dementia does to a person and a family. He wanted to transition on his own terms, while he was still recognizably himself. What followed is one of the most luminous chapters I have ever heard a human being describe. Trena and Andre forgave each other. They prepared together. They surrendered together. They walked each other home. This is the most human polarity we have explored on Hell Yeah You Will. Grief and Hope live as companions, sharing the same body, the same breath, the same chapter. Trena’s pilot light is here to help yours stay lit. If you are standing at the foot of the mountain of grief right now, this episode is for you. If someone you love is standing there, send it their way. We close today with my song Move Through Me, dedicated this week to Ginger and her beloved mother, who we lost recently. About today’s Guest Trena White is co-founder and co-CEO of Page Two, one of the most innovative independent publishing firms in the world. Their list includes the million-copy bestseller The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay-Stanier, Exactly What to Say by Phil M. Jones, and a little book you may have heard of called Permission to Glow, A Spiritual Guide to Epic Leadership by yours truly. Trena was previously the publisher of Douglas & McIntyre and Greystone Books, and an editor at McClelland & Stewart. She is a finalist for the RBC Women of Influence Trailblazer Award, mother to two boys, and a woman who has walked through the kind of loss most of us cannot quite picture. What does your pilot light need from you today? Listen, Share, and Leave a Review * Listen to the episode above, or wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161]🎧 (3:09) * The 1-min show trailer is here [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/p/hell-yeah-you-will-podcast-trailer] 🎧 * Subscribe and Leave us a Review:Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever you listen [https://pod.link/1870548161] * Share it with someone who could use reminders to keep going. Show Notes: * Page Two Books [https://pagetwo.com/about-us/] * Connect with Trena White on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/trenawhite/] * Lyric video for my song, Move Through Me (I am the Sky). Coaching Accelerates Your Big Next At Epic Leadership, we work with founders, high-potential executives, and Chief People Officers who are navigating rapid-change and want to lead from a place of power— not panic. Our approach is backed by data, grounded in real practice, and honestly, a helluva lot more fun than your last leadership training. Two things get me fired-up as a coach right now.1. Your X-factors as a human being matter more than ever.Your clarity. Your presence. Your ability to lead people through chaos without losing yourself. No AI can replicate that. Not yet, not ever. But only if you REMEMBER it. Only if you believe it down to your core. 2. Which is what makes me nervous. In 15+ years of coaching Fortune 500 leaders, I have watched brilliant people forget their worth. Our lives and careers are cycles of forgetting, then remembering. The dip, then the hockey stick. Our work together? In this time of chaos, change and disruption, we must shorten that dip. Grab 30 minutes with me [https://thisepiclife.as.me/kc-30] to chat 1:1 coaching, or training for your team. Here is my ask. We are expanding our 1:1 Coaching and Leadership Development programs right now. If this is landing, I would love 30 minutes to discuss your goals. Get full access to Hell Yeah You Will with Kristoffer Carter at kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Cheryl Rice: Two Words Change Everything

U2 dropped their second surprise EP in six weeks, on Good Friday. Dark, confusing times make great art. I won’t go nuts on just how personal, profound and gorgeous the Easter Lily EP is. However, the opening track has The Edge singing lead vocals. I played Song for Hal for my daughter Frankie last night. We were both a little gobsmacked. The line that really gets me? “Did you know he is close to God, who makes his old friends laugh?” We can chase our Divinity through India, or in endless hours of meditation. If we’re lucky to be Irish, maybe we can meet our old friends at the pub. A surprise benefit of recording new podcast episodes has been catching up with old friends. We’re mostly sober podcasters who show up wearing headphones, in really clean audio. And oh, how we love to laugh. 😆 Today, we go deep into why it’s so important to create things. My good (young) friend, Jonathan Fields reminds us why rolling up our sleeves and getting dirty— making, creating, cooking, and building— is more important than ever in the age of AI. And I have to say, the last minute of our interview made me LMFAO. So I had to edit Jonathan’s advice “Just be a freak” down to a 1-minute Commencement Speech. This is the advice we all should have been given on our last day of school. Hell Yeah You Will is excited to share this 32-min deep-dive with Good Life Project™ Founder and podcast host (100 mm + downloads), award-winning author and creator of the SparkType™ assessment, and all-around Mensch: Jonathan Fields. Do we create for impact, or for the love of creating? About Jonathan Fields Jonathan Fields is a dad, husband, award-winning author of six books, co-executive producer and host of the Good Life Project® podcast (100M+ listens), and founder and CEO of Spark Endeavors, where he developed the Sparketype® Assessment — used by over one million people to reconnect with purpose, possibility, and joy. He writes the Awake at the Wheel newsletter on Substack and is a lifelong maker of everything from businesses and books to acoustic guitars, paintings, metalwork, and tables. His recent TEDx talk, “Why Craft Matters Now More Than Ever,” reframes the stakes of what he’s always been doing. He put it this way: “I’m a father, a husband, a maker and a man who cares deeply about, loves and admires those closest to him and is humbled and grateful for the opportunity to create, to connect and to serve.” That sentence is the key to this conversation. It’s not about entrepreneurship. It’s about what making things does to a person — and what it gives back to the people they love. Listen now on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161] Listen, Share, and Leave a Review * Listen to the episode above, or wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161]🎧 (32:06) * The 1-min show trailer is here [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/p/hell-yeah-you-will-podcast-trailer] 🎧 * Subscribe and Leave us a Review:Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever you listen [https://pod.link/1870548161] * Share it with someone who could use reminders to keep going. Connect with Jonathan and his work: * Here on Substack: Awake at the Wheel, [https://jonathanfields.substack.com/] with Jonathan Fields * His latest book SPARKED [https://sparketype.com/book/] and the free 10-min SparkType™ assessment * Watch the TED Talk: Why Craft Matters Now, More than Ever [https://youtu.be/2zUAM-euiVI?si=LZCRAyD9wxoKNbzm] (11:20) * Main speaking site, etc: jonathanfields.com [https://www.jonathanfields.com/] * Award-Winning Good Life Project™ Podcast [https://www.goodlifeproject.com/podcast/] We love your feedback. What was your favorite part? Are you, or someone you know in need of a coach? At Epic Leadership, we work with founders, high-potential executives, founders, and Chief People Officers who are navigating rapid-change and want to lead from a place of power— not panic. Our approach is backed by data, grounded in real practice, and honestly, a lot more fun than your last leadership training. Two things get me fired-up as a coach right now.1. Your X-factors as a human being matter more than ever.Your clarity. Your presence. Your ability to lead people through chaos without losing yourself. No AI can replicate that. Not yet, not ever. But only if you REMEMBER it. Only if you believe it down to your core. 2. Which is what makes me nervous. In 15+ years of coaching Fortune 500 leaders, I have watched brilliant people forget their worth. Our lives and careers are cycles of forgetting, then remembering. The dip, then the hockey stick. Our work together? In this time of chaos, change and disruption, we must shorten that dip. Grab 30 minutes with me [https://thisepiclife.as.me/kc-30] to chat 1:1 coaching, or training for your team. Here is my ask. We are expanding our 1:1 Coaching and Leadership Development programs right now. If this is landing, I would love 30 minutes to discuss your goals. Get full access to Hell Yeah You Will with Kristoffer Carter at kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

NFL Center to Massive Real Estate Deals

Imagine your wildest childhood dream coming true. Something so huge you were never sure it’s even possible. Then every Monday showing up, unsure if you’ll be cut. That was Dave Pearson’s early twenties in the NFL. The only thing he could control was how hard he worked. When his pro football career ended, Dave had to shop for suits. With a 20-inch neck. 🤯 His corporate chapter must’ve worked out, because he’s helping lead the company that that took a chance on him. He’s passionate about redeveloping communities and creating affordable housing. His office sits atop of New York City’s stunning Hudson Yards. He’s led that team to becoming one of the largest, and most successful in the world in terms of deal volume. When we met in person, my first question was “who’s one of your favorite coaches?” He immediately mentioned Alex Gibbs [https://www.si.com/nfl/falcons/onsi/news/former-atlanta-falcons-line-coach-alex-gibbs-80-obit-dies-nfl], legendary offensive line coach of the Atlanta Falcons. Coach Gibbs slapped players with a “sensitivity fine.” Whenever you pout or push back on getting coached hard. Two hundred bucks. Posted on the board for the whole room to see. From the highest performing rockstar players, to the youngest guys hoping to make the team. This lesson really stuck. We talked about the moments when a deal feels impossible. When chaos ensues, or people want to bail. That’s Dave’s favorite part: seeing the win despite everything falling apart. Dave Pearson is the Executive Vice President of Related Affordable, probably the largest affordable housing development firm in the United States. We trace his wild arc from Michigan Wolverine to Detroit Lion to Atlanta Falcon to NFL Europe, and the blown knee started his leadership journey. Eighteen years later, to quote another favorite coach, Dave’s still there: “showing up like the weather.” 1-Min on winning, despite the odds In coaching, I use a 1980s arcade analogy called Player One. Player One takes full responsibility for their performance and results. If Mario wants to progress through the levels, he can’t blame Donkey Kong or Bowser. He must learn to adapt and perform. To go the distance as a leader, it takes resilience and a dance between extreme self-reliance and playing on a high-performing team. Whether that’s a band like U2 or this season’s Seattle Seahawks, a high-functioning team will take us further than we ever could have gone alone. There’s an old African proverb: if you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together. This is the polarity of Team and Player One. Dave Pearson is the Executive Vice President of Related Affordable, a division of Related Companies, one of the largest privately owned real estate firms in the United States with over $70 billion in assets owned or under development. Over the past 18 years, Dave has helped build and grow the firm’s affordable multifamily acquisitions and development team nationwide, leading preservation-focused investments at scale. Prior to his career in real estate, Dave was an NFL offensive lineman for the Detroit Lions and Atlanta Falcons. He serves on the boards of the Related Affordable Foundation, Randall’s Island Park Alliance, and the University of Missouri Athletic Academic Career Center. He lives in New York City with his wife Caitlin and their three daughters. Please welcome to Hell Yeah You Will— David Pearson. Listen, Share, and Leave a Review * Listen to the episode above, or wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161]🎧 (32:06) * The 1-min show trailer is here [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/p/hell-yeah-you-will-podcast-trailer] 🎧 * Subscribe and Leave us a Review:Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever you listen [https://pod.link/1870548161] * Share it with someone who could use reminders to keep going. Would love to hear what you think? What inspired you? Get full access to Hell Yeah You Will with Kristoffer Carter at kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Jonathan Fields: Creating for Impact, or Love?

U2 dropped their second surprise EP in six weeks, on Good Friday. Dark, confusing times make great art. I won’t go nuts on just how personal, profound and gorgeous the Easter Lily EP is. However, the opening track has The Edge singing lead vocals. I played Song for Hal for my daughter Frankie last night. We were both a little gobsmacked. The line that really gets me? “Did you know he is close to God, who makes his old friends laugh?” We can chase our Divinity through India, or in endless hours of meditation. If we’re lucky to be Irish, maybe we can meet our old friends at the pub. A surprise benefit of recording new podcast episodes has been catching up with old friends. We’re mostly sober podcasters who show up wearing headphones, in really clean audio. And oh, how we love to laugh. 😆 Today, we go deep into why it’s so important to create things. My good (young) friend, Jonathan Fields reminds us why rolling up our sleeves and getting dirty— making, creating, cooking, and building— is more important than ever in the age of AI. And I have to say, the last minute of our interview made me LMFAO. So I had to edit Jonathan’s advice “Just be a freak” down to a 1-minute Commencement Speech. This is the advice we all should have been given on our last day of school. Hell Yeah You Will is excited to share this 32-min deep-dive with Good Life Project™ Founder and podcast host (100 mm + downloads), award-winning author and creator of the SparkType™ assessment, and all-around Mensch: Jonathan Fields. Do we create for impact, or for the love of creating? About Jonathan Fields Jonathan Fields is a dad, husband, award-winning author of six books, co-executive producer and host of the Good Life Project® podcast (100M+ listens), and founder and CEO of Spark Endeavors, where he developed the Sparketype® Assessment — used by over one million people to reconnect with purpose, possibility, and joy. He writes the Awake at the Wheel newsletter on Substack and is a lifelong maker of everything from businesses and books to acoustic guitars, paintings, metalwork, and tables. His recent TEDx talk, “Why Craft Matters Now More Than Ever,” reframes the stakes of what he’s always been doing. He put it this way: “I’m a father, a husband, a maker and a man who cares deeply about, loves and admires those closest to him and is humbled and grateful for the opportunity to create, to connect and to serve.” That sentence is the key to this conversation. It’s not about entrepreneurship. It’s about what making things does to a person — and what it gives back to the people they love. Listen now on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161] Listen, Share, and Leave a Review * Listen to the episode above, or wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161]🎧 (32:06) * The 1-min show trailer is here [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/p/hell-yeah-you-will-podcast-trailer] 🎧 * Subscribe and Leave us a Review:Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever you listen [https://pod.link/1870548161] * Share it with someone who could use reminders to keep going. Connect with Jonathan and his work: * Here on Substack: Awake at the Wheel, [https://jonathanfields.substack.com/] with Jonathan Fields * His latest book SPARKED [https://sparketype.com/book/] and the free 10-min SparkType™ assessment * Watch the TED Talk: Why Craft Matters Now, More than Ever [https://youtu.be/2zUAM-euiVI?si=LZCRAyD9wxoKNbzm] (11:20) * Main speaking site, etc: jonathanfields.com [https://www.jonathanfields.com/] * Award-Winning Good Life Project™ Podcast [https://www.goodlifeproject.com/podcast/] We love your feedback. What was your favorite part? Are you, or someone you know in need of a coach? At Epic Leadership, we work with founders, high-potential executives, founders, and Chief People Officers who are navigating rapid-change and want to lead from a place of power— not panic. Our approach is backed by data, grounded in real practice, and honestly, a lot more fun than your last leadership training. Two things get me fired-up as a coach right now.1. Your X-factors as a human being matter more than ever.Your clarity. Your presence. Your ability to lead people through chaos without losing yourself. No AI can replicate that. Not yet, not ever. But only if you REMEMBER it. Only if you believe it down to your core. 2. Which is what makes me nervous. In 15+ years of coaching Fortune 500 leaders, I have watched brilliant people forget their worth. Our lives and careers are cycles of forgetting, then remembering. The dip, then the hockey stick. Our work together? In this time of chaos, change and disruption, we must shorten that dip. Grab 30 minutes with me [https://thisepiclife.as.me/kc-30] to chat 1:1 coaching, or training for your team. Here is my ask. We are expanding our 1:1 Coaching and Leadership Development programs right now. If this is landing, I would love 30 minutes to discuss your goals. Get full access to Hell Yeah You Will with Kristoffer Carter at kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

How a Little Becomes a Lot

Our new yard began as a farm in 1868. Lately I’ve been going deep on gardening. I used to complain and rush, or make my yard work anyone else’s problem. Our old farmhouse is different, or maybe our new season of life is more about simplicity, beauty, and slowing down.I look forward to cutting the grass, which will balance our compost, and fuel many waves of vegetables and flowers. There’s a deeper gratitude I’ve felt these last three months, since a drunk driver nearly ended my life. More than that rascal, there’s a new vision of self-sufficiency and sustainability that has me inspired. What if our soil has everything we need, and it’s been waiting to be unlocked? Nurturing hundreds of seedlings also has me redesigning our coaching business. We’re expanding our client base, and I could use your help. More on that below. First up, a conversation about perseverance that kicked my ass into gear. This week on Hell Yeah You Will, I catch up with a fellow traveler on the recovery road, and author of a great new book that drops today, March 31st. Emotions are important. They guide us. And, if you’ve got an emotional system like mine, you don’t want them running the show. Eric Zimmer At 24, my guest today was homeless, addicted to heroin, and facing serious prison time. Eric Zimmer’s journey from those depths sparked his lifelong inquiry into human transformation and resilience. Twelve years and 800 episodes ago, Eric launched the One You Feed podcast with his best friend Chris. Having exceeded 50 million downloads, their success with One You Feed led to Eric’s major publishing deal with Harper Collins. I’m proud to say I’ve been a guest on that excellent podcast a couple times over the years. We dig into Eric’s book that launches today: How a Little Becomes a Lot— The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life. We also talk about the polarity/tension at the core of Eric’s journey: between radical transformation and incremental change. Eric’s story reminds me what’s possible when we surrender at a few levels: into healing, into asking better questions from a place of curiosity, and into the longer, more patient path to self-compassion. 1-min Clip: Action + Right Thinking Today’s Guest Eric Zimmer is an author, teacher, speaker, and the creator of The One You Feed podcast—an award-winning show with over 50 million downloads across 800+ conversations exploring meaningful living. His new book is How a Little Becomes a Lot— The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life [https://www.harpercollins.com/products/how-a-little-becomes-a-lot-eric-zimmer?variant=43996638838818] (Harper Collins, pub date: March 31st 2026) Through his behavior coaching, workshops, and mentorship, he has guided thousands worldwide in creating sustainable habits that last—not through willpower or epiphany, but through steady change. Eric's approach combines cutting-edge science with timeless wisdom, providing practical pathways to greater integrity and deeper meaning. Listen now on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161] Listen, Share, and Leave a Review * Listen to the episode above, or wherever else [https://pod.link/1870548161]🎧 (34:26) * The 1-min show trailer is here [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/p/hell-yeah-you-will-podcast-trailer] 🎧 * Subscribe and Leave us a Review:Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7cYiuRKkYVXxZ7OCPOic1g?si=dd6625383271425b] | Apple Podcasts [https://www.notion.so/Hell-Yeah-You-Will-Launch-Checklist-edd41a4f47024274a267920133ea29b0?source=copy_link] | Or, wherever you listen [https://pod.link/1870548161] * Share it with someone who could use reminders to keep going. Connect with Eric Zimmer and his work: * Instagram: The One You Feed [https://www.instagram.com/one_you_feed/] * How a Little Becomes a Lot— The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life [https://www.harpercollins.com/products/how-a-little-becomes-a-lot-eric-zimmer?variant=43996638838818] - New Book on Harper Collins * Order the brand new book: Amazon [https://www.amazon.com/dp/0063420805/?bestFormat=true&k=how%20a%20little%20becomes%20a%20lot%20eric%20zimmer] * Listen to Eric’s Award-Winning podcast, The One You Feed [https://www.oneyoufeed.net/] We love your feedback! What stuck out for you? Are you, or someone you know in need of a coach? At Epic Leadership, we work with founders, high-potential executives, founders, and Chief People Officers who are navigating rapid-change and want to lead from a place of power— not panic. Our approach is backed by data, grounded in real practice, and honestly, a lot more fun than your last leadership training. Two things get me fired-up as a coach right now.1. Your X-factors as a human being matter more than ever.Your clarity. Your presence. Your ability to lead people through chaos without losing yourself. No AI can replicate that. Not yet, not ever. But only if you REMEMBER it. Only if you believe it down to your core. 2. Which is what makes me nervous. In 15+ years of coaching Fortune 500 leaders, I have watched brilliant people forget their worth. Our lives and careers are cycles of forgetting, then remembering. The dip, then the hockey stick. Our work together? In this time of chaos, change and disruption, we must shorten that dip. Grab 30 minutes with me [https://thisepiclife.as.me/kc-30] to chat 1:1 coaching, or training for your team. Here is my ask. We are expanding our 1:1 Coaching and Leadership Development programs right now. If this is landing, I would love 30 minutes to discuss your goals. Get full access to Hell Yeah You Will with Kristoffer Carter at kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe [https://kristoffercarter.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]