The Virgin Edition & My Crazy Icks Part 2 | EP 18

The Virgin Edition & My Crazy Icks Part 2 | EP 18

Hi gay, I know you’ve missed me since my last english podcast, so   I’m here to announce that my deluxe album: LAURA GAURA - The Virgin Edition is out now! in this episode I will continue my endless list of icks, but before that, we need to talk about the album i’ve been working on for months and months! At the end of the podcast I’ll play you the whole album and let me know what you think in the comments! This Deluxe version of the Laura Gaura debut album is a step into my asexual, pure, virgin side. The debut album was so sexy through and through, that I felt like I had to exorcise that demon through my gospel EP and prepare you all for the rebrand of the decade.  The CDs are Made in Italy with my real pubes inside the case, plus 3 shiny tiny stickers you can place proudly on your laptop or anywhere. For the really special fans, I have created an exclusive t-shirt in the style of a magazine, with me as the chief of the chopped khias in mermaid form. If you want to win a CD or a tshirt, you have to send me a voice note DM with a spicy confession, so crank it! A short track by track commentary, the first song Pizdamea, which means MY C*NT, is a song derived from ganja burn by  Nicki Minaj. I felt it was the perfect OPENING song because the lyrics say: abstaining from sex, had to zen my body, i aint giving so don’t ask i don’t lend my body, gotta be king status to give men my body……. Second song is inspired by my escort shemale friend, who made me realise that if I was a Shemale, all my problems and disappointments would be solved.  indeed, you don’t really get invited on dates and become a wife, but at least your money will always grow thanks to foolish men who step out of their marriages to get fucked by trans dick.  Moving onto Khia Asylum, i felt like the song fit perfectly on this virgin edition and throught this song I continue the narrative that my pussy is a sanctuary and my ass is pure, so I would rather stick to being in the khia asylum than out on the streets that are packed with loser men, and so should you.  Jumping into the original album which i hope everyone has heard by now, we drop it down low for one last time for old times’ sake, before ending things with a comedown of the two deluxe songs, in a folk and piano form, as a symbol for the realisation that the whoring is a whole bunch of disappointing experiences in the end and you’re better off living life for yourself. PWP JOS

Lumy Nitsa: fimear scarba de vibratoare si cururi

Lumy Nitsa are un mesaj pentru ascultatorii Laura Gaura Show si anume ca femeilor le trebuie genti, masini, bucatarii, vacante, nu p*lu si vibratoare in cur. De asemenea, sa se stie ca curul nu e pentru f*tut!

De ce barbatii hetero isi rad flocii?! + curul nu e pentru futut & primavara incepe cu FUTIME | EP 17

Vine primavara si este timpul ca eu, laura gaura, sa dau startul la sex. Sex pe moca, sex pe bani, sex pe o ciocolata Africana, voi decideti, insa e vremea sa incepem curatenia de primavara, sa ne tundem flocisorii, si sa iesim in lume. Da, corpul nostru este un templu, dar uneori pentru a ne reveni mintea la cap, trebuie sa ne si regulam. Cata vreme ramanem puternice emotional, putem programa cate sule dorim pe zi.  Desi sunt intr-o era destul de asexuala a vietii mele (si voi discuta chestia asta in melodiile deluxe din luna Mai), totusi am o obligatie morala fata de sistemul meu nervos si sexosenia mea, sa ma regulez odata la cateva luni. Nu imi place sincer, dar trebuie sa onoram sexosenia. Primavara si Toamna sunt cele mai bune perioade pentru regulare, pentru ca vara este prea cald sa ne desfacem cracii transpirati in mutra cuiva, iar iarna nu bate nimeni drumul pentru o gaura sau un carnacior. Vara este facuta ca sa ne simtem bine cu prietenii nostri, si eventual daca se pune problema de o aventura prin vacante, atunci ok se scuza.  Subiectul pe care il vom aborda astazi nu poate fi discutat DECAT in limba romana si este o observatie care ma debusoleaza de cativa ani incoace si care a culminat cu expunerea mea la un grup pe telegram unde un individ posteaza videouri cu cupluri de romani futandu-se, sugandu-se si mai stiu eu ce.  Interesant cum pana si cei mai homofobi barbati romani sunt mai fini in zona inghinala decat unele femei. In ziua de azi femeile au mai multi floci decat barbatii hetero, si trebuie sa incep o investigatie pe acest subiect cumva, in mare parte cu ajutorul ascultatoarelor mele care au in palmarezul lor destule pule de romani ca sa traga linie.  In Romania, daca mergi pe strada purtand orice altceva decat blugi, tricou, trening, geaca de fash, esti instant luat in deradere de acesti paraziti ai societatii a caror cariera este formata din combinatii. Combinatii adica femei la produs, la videochat si vanzarea de substante. Si cu toate aceste smecherii, ei sunt mai domnisoare decat domnisoarele, odata ce le dai chilotii jos si ii observi cat de pensati si gelati sunt. Oare anturajul sau familia i-a invatat sa fie asa aranjati pe dedesubt?

My EXTREME list of ICKS in men & relationships + Valentine's Day TED Talk | ENGLISH EPISODE 16

For my first English episode, I present to you my extreme list of icks which may sound absurd to some, but I feel like my experience justifies having such icks. Whilst Valentine's Day is not just about gifts and spending money, it is about acknowledging each other if you are in a relationship, and if you're not, just acknowledge yourself and love YO SELF. Send me confessions in my DMs on Instagram @misslauragaura

Make Pulele Sculate Again | EP 15

Buna buna vrei o pula? Gay hey sunt laura gaura si astazi vin la dumneavoastra in calitate de presedinta comitetului de erectii, sa discutam in continuare despre acest fenomen al pulelor molesite, sustinut de un sondaj pe reddit si bineinteles o noua confesiune pe acest subiect putin mai tarziu. De ce ma tot bat in piept pe acest subiect? pentru ca nu mai e nimeni in stare nici de relatii si nici de sex.  Barbatii nu vor relatii ca prefera casual sex, iar cand vine vorba de casual sex, li se culca. Deci mai bine ne punem botnita la pizde si ne vedem de viata.  Trimiteti-mi confesiuni la @misslauragaura pe instagram, pwp jos.