Growing up with different rules.

What Really Happens at Kilukam?

Hi everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Modern Malayali! If you’ve spent any time around Malayali communities in Europe, you’ve probably heard people talk about Kilukam. The outfits, the performances, the friend groups travelling across cities… and of course the after parties. But what actually is Kilukam? In this episode of Modern Malayali, I am joined by Megha, the co-host of Kilukam 2026. We break down Europe’s largest Malayali formal event — how it started, how it grew so quickly, and what the experience is really like if you’re attending for the first time. We talk about: * How Kilukam began and why it became so popular * How people actually get tickets (especially outside the UK) * The performances, competitions and fashion moments * The controversies and what changed this year * The overall vibe of the night (and yes… the after parties) Whether you’ve been to Kilukam before, seen it all over social media, or are just curious about the hype, this episode gives you the inside story. Because wherever Malayalis go, we somehow manage to build community… and occasionally turn it into a full-scale formal event. Don't forget to check out Megha's social media pages and show some love! Instagram: @meghha.sm [https://www.instagram.com/meghha.sm?igsh=MW5zMHF1ZTlobzg5dw%3D%3D] Tiktok: @megha.sm [https://www.tiktok.com/@megha.sm?_r=1&_t=ZN-95Ot9mIJ8mE] KILUSCAM [https://www.tiktok.com/@megha.sm/video/7501799568250539286?_r=1&_t=ZN-94qZInzes79] or KILUAKM? [https://www.tiktok.com/@megha.sm/video/7596391891516574998?_r=1&_t=ZN-94qZHtGfXvi] ----------------------------------------------------- About the Modern Malayali podcast:Have you ever wondered how other Malayalis live their lives outside of Kerala?I have. I've always been curious about how other Malayalis navigate their culture while living very modern, Western lives.I’m talking about the influence our culture has had on the decisions and choices we've made — from choosing a career path to choosing a life partner, from how we talk about mental health to how we spend our free time.This is a podcast where Malayalis from all over the world can connect and share stories. We’re all in this together, and I’m sure many of us have had similar experiences. Hopefully, one of these episodes will inspire or reassure you that you're not alone in this. ----------------------------------------------------- Please follow, rate, and review the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube Music. To stay up to date with new episodes and upcoming guests, find me on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/modern.malayali/] or TikTok! [https://www.tiktok.com/@modern.malayali]Instagram and TikTok are also a great ways to connect with me, and to let me know if you’re interested in being on the show! ----------------------------------------------------- Music by Kalpesh Ajugia [https://pixabay.com/users/kalsstockmedia-13377274/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583] from Pixabay [https://pixabay.com/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583].

Moving Back Home After Independence

Hi everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Modern Malayali! After years of living independently for studies, work, or life abroad, moving back home can feel comforting… and confusing at the same time. In this episode of Modern Malayali, I’m joined by Shilka, a newly graduated med student who’s just moved back in with her parents. We talk honestly about what it’s like returning home as an adult: adjusting to routines, navigating boundaries, handling differing expectations, and rediscovering family life from a whole new perspective. We chat about freedom, family expectations, funny misunderstandings, the joy of eating home-cooked meals, and the reality of being an adult under your parents’ roof. Please do go show Shilka [https://www.instagram.com/shilka_sabu/] some love! @shilka_sabu [https://www.tiktok.com/@shilka_sabu] ----------------------------------------------------- About the Modern Malayali podcast: Have you ever wondered how other Malayalis live their lives outside of Kerala? I have. I've always been curious about how other Malayalis navigate their culture while living very modern, Western lives. I’m talking about the influence our culture has had on the decisions and choices we've made — from choosing a career path to choosing a life partner, from how we talk about mental health to how we spend our free time. This is a podcast where Malayalis from all over the world can connect and share stories. We’re all in this together, and I’m sure many of us have had similar experiences. Hopefully, one of these episodes will inspire or reassure you that you're not alone in this. ----------------------------------------------------- Please follow, rate, and review the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube Music. To stay up to date with new episodes and upcoming guests, find me on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/modern.malayali/] or TikTok! [https://www.tiktok.com/@modern.malayali] Instagram and TikTok are also a great ways to connect with me, and to let me know if you’re interested in being on the show! ----------------------------------------------------- Music by Kalpesh Ajugia [https://pixabay.com/users/kalsstockmedia-13377274/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583] from Pixabay. [https://pixabay.com/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583]

Do you speak Malayalam bro?

Hi everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Modern Malayali! Many of us understand Malayalam perfectly well but for some of us (i.e. me) speaking it feels so awkward and is such a struggle. My guest Thomas, on the other hand, has brilliantly taken the initiative at the age of 16 to teach himself how to speak our language, Malayalam. Together we explore and reflect on why speaking our mother tongue is important to us. It’s about wanting to speak to our parents and grandparents without hesitation. About feeling closer to elders, understanding their stories, and meeting them in a language that feels more natural to them than English ever will. We talk about why so many of us struggle to speak the language, the guilt of not speaking ‘proper’ Malayalam, the fear of saying it wrong, and why learning it as an adult feels so… embarrassing. We also reflect on whether it’s worth putting in the effort now and what that effort might mean for the generations that come after us. Can we pass on a language we’re still learning ourselves? ----------------------------------------------------- About the Modern Malayali podcast: Have you ever wondered how other Malayalis live their lives outside of Kerala? I have. I've always been curious about how other Malayalis navigate their culture while living very modern, Western lives. I’m talking about the influence our culture has had on the decisions and choices we've made — from choosing a career path to choosing a life partner, from how we talk about mental health to how we spend our free time. This is a podcast where Malayalis from all over the world can connect and share stories. We’re all in this together, and I’m sure many of us have had similar experiences. Hopefully, one of these episodes will inspire or reassure you that you're not alone in this. ----------------------------------------------------- Please follow, rate, and review the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube Music. To stay up to date with new episodes and upcoming guests, find me on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/modern.malayali/] or TikTok! [https://www.tiktok.com/@modern.malayali] Instagram and TikTok are also a great ways to connect with me, and to let me know if you’re interested in being on the show! ----------------------------------------------------- Music by Kalpesh Ajugia [https://pixabay.com/users/kalsstockmedia-13377274/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583] from Pixabay. [https://pixabay.com/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583]

Growing up with different rules.

Hi everyone, and welcome back to another episode of Modern Malayali! In this episode, I’m joined by Sneha to talk about how boys and girls are often raised differently in Malayali households and families. It’s like our parents were given two different rulebooks for sons and daughters! We share our personal stories and reflect on the small, everyday differences in how we were raised: who helped in the kitchen, who had curfews, who was allowed to make mistakes, and whose choices were examined with a magnifying glass. We talk about family gatherings, teenage years, safety vs freedom, career and marriage pressures, emotional expression, and how these early experiences shape confidence, relationships, and our identity later in life. Why do girls end up in the kitchen at family gatherings while boys disappear? Why do boys get freedom early, but girls get “protection”? Why are boys taught not to show or express their emotions? And how do these small differences follow us into adulthood? This is a light-hearted conversation about understanding our upbringing and imagining a fairer, kinder future for the next generation of Malayalis. If this episode reminds you of your own childhood, share it with a sibling or friend and start the conversation. Don't forget to check out Sneha's social media pages and show some love! Instagram: ⁠@sneham_⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/sneham_/] Tiktok: ⁠@sneham_19 [https://www.tiktok.com/@sneham_19] ----------------------------------------------------- About the Modern Malayali podcast: Have you ever wondered how other Malayalis live their lives outside of Kerala? I have. I've always been curious about how other Malayalis navigate their culture while living very modern, Western lives. I’m talking about the influence our culture has had on the decisions and choices we've made — from choosing a career path to choosing a life partner, from how we talk about mental health to how we spend our free time. This is a podcast where Malayalis from all over the world can connect and share stories. We’re all in this together, and I’m sure many of us have had similar experiences. Hopefully, one of these episodes will inspire or reassure you that you're not alone in this. ----------------------------------------------------- Please follow, rate, and review the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube Music. To stay up to date with new episodes and upcoming guests, find me on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/modern.malayali/] or TikTok! [https://www.tiktok.com/@modern.malayali] Instagram and TikTok are also a great ways to connect with me, and to let me know if you’re interested in being on the show! ----------------------------------------------------- Music by Kalpesh Ajugia [https://pixabay.com/users/kalsstockmedia-13377274/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583] from Pixaby. [https://pixabay.com/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583]

Bro, when are you getting married?

Hi everyone and welcome back to another episode of Modern Malayali! We've all heard that question, from aunties, uncles, parents, friends, and sometimes even from complete strangers at weddings. But what is it really like being on the receiving end of that pressure, especially as a Malayali guy? In this episode, Johan and I talk about what that really feels like, watching your friends, even the younger ones, getting engaged or married, while you're still trying to make it past the first or second call with someone. We chat about how our generation views marriage differently compared to our parents, and how the expectation for men to be the primary provider is still a thing in our community. We also dig into some of the challenges of finding a match within the community, specifically how the geography and religion filters almost automatically eliminate so many potential prospects. Because let's be honest, in the Malayali Christian world, Catholic girls usually want Catholic guys, and crossing those lines isn't always easy. We also talk about the lessons that come with this process. About having the right mindset, putting in effort, and being willing to engage actively in the process. It’s a heartfelt, funny, and honest look at what modern marriage pressure feels like for our generation.  -------------------------------------------------------- About the Modern Malayali podcast: Have you ever wondered how other Malayalis live their lives outside of Kerala? I have. I've always been curious about how other Malayalis navigate their culture while living very modern, Western lives. I’m talking about the influence our culture has had on the decisions and choices we've made — from choosing a career path to choosing a life partner, from how we talk about mental health to how we spend our free time. This is a podcast where Malayalis from all over the world can connect and share stories. We’re all in this together, and I’m sure many of us have had similar experiences. Hopefully, one of these episodes will inspire or reassure you that you're not alone in this.  --------------------------------------------------------  To stay up to date with new episodes and upcoming guests, find me on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/modern.malayali/] and TikTok [https://www.tiktok.com/@modern.malayali]! Instagram and TikTok are also a great way to connect with me, and to let me know if you’re interested in being on the show!  --------------------------------------------------------  Music by Kalpesh Ajugia [https://pixabay.com/users/kalsstockmedia-13377274/?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583] from Pixabay [https://pixabay.com//?utm_source=link-attribution&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=music&utm_content=263583].