Holding Space For Misinformation

The Math Nobody Told You About: The Mom Wage Gap

If you've ever felt like you're working twice as hard for half the recognition — this one's for you. In Episode 3, we're doing the math on the mom wage gap: what it is, why it happens, and how to start closing it on your own terms. In This Episode: What the "career pause penalty" is and how it compounds over time Why mothers are offered lower starting salaries than women without kids — with the same experience Why fathers often get a raise when they become dads (yes, really) What "mom capital" is and why you've been underselling it 3 actionable ways to reclaim your time, your value, and your income Referenced in This Episode: Ep. 01 — The Time Budget Ep. 02 — The Default Parent Tax Links: 🎥 Watch on YouTube [https://youtu.be/MXm85F-N-qk] 📝 Read the full essay on Substack [https://lifebymj.substack.com/] 🛍️ Democracy is a Group Project tee [https://needleandstitchstudio.com/blank_product/331005256/Democracy-is-a-Group-Project] 🌐 lifebymj.com [http://lifebymj.com] 📱 @lifebymj If this episode hit home, share it with a mama who needs to hear it. She's not imagining it — and neither were you. Want me to also format this for a specific podcast host like Spotify for Podcasters or Buzzsprout? They each have slight formatting quirks worth knowing. Sonnet 4.6 Get full access to Mom Math at lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe [https://lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

The Default Parent (Before I Ever Became One)

The Default Parent Tax - Mom Math – Episode 2 Being the default parent is often treated like “just how things are,” but the reality is that it comes with real costs. Time. Energy. Mental load. And eventually, money. In this episode of Mom Math, MJ breaks down what it truly means to be the default parent, why invisible labor is still labor, and how carrying the mental hard drive of a household impacts mothers in ways we rarely talk about. This conversation explores not just what the default parent does, but how the role quietly affects burnout, creativity, patience, and long-term earning potential. In this episode, we talk about: - What it actually means to be the “default parent” - The invisible labor and cognitive load many mothers carry daily - How default parents lose hours each day managing unseen tasks - Why burnout often shows up as snapping over small things - Simple ways to start redistributing the load at home - Why communication is the key to reducing the Default Parent Tax This episode is about naming the labor, not assigning blame.Because recognizing the math is the first step to changing it. 👉 Next episode: Episode 3 dives into the financial impact of motherhood, including the mom wage gap and how invisible labor shows up on the balance sheet. Get full access to Mom Math at lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe [https://lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Motherhood Is Expensive (And Not Just Financially)

Episode 1 of Mom Math is about the hidden costs of motherhood: the time tax, the mental load, the invisible labor. But before we keep breaking down the numbers, I want to tell you why this series exists in the first place. I created Mom Math because I’m tired. Tired of watching mothers shrink themselves to fit a society that doesn’t nurture, promote, or truly care for them, yet still expects us to do everything. Tired of the constant adjusting. The constant reshaping. The quiet expectation that we will always be the ones to bend. We are forever being asked to shift toward what the world wants instead of what we need.In our careers.In our relationships with others—and with ourselves.In how we raise children.In how we build businesses or choose not to.In whether we dare to want more, or dare to want less. And too often, the choice is never us. Mom Math exists because I want mothers to choose themselves: not just today, but for the long term. Because I genuinely believe the world is better when women lead. And mothers? We’re already doing the work. We’re problem-solvers, strategists, caregivers, builders, and visionaries. We run households, manage logistics, carry emotional labor, and still show up creatively, professionally, and communally. Motherhood isn’t one thing.It isn’t one path.It isn’t one story. Mothers take shape in so many ways—through birth, by choice, as aunties, cousins, caregivers, community builders, even pet moms. It is a vast, layered experience. And it deserves systems that reflect that complexity instead of punishing it. And yes, I believe it’s past time we start making money while mothering. Mom Math is about naming the real costs we carry and then learning how to flip the equation. Not by hustling harder or sacrificing more, but by building lives, careers, and systems that actually support us. I’m not sharing this from a place of having it all figured out. I don’t. But I am somewhere I once only dreamed of. I own multiple businesses. I’ve worked with world-class brands. I’ve built community. And I’m actively creating a legacy for my family while still learning how to protect my peace, my time, and my energy. I know I’m not alone in wanting that. I know other women and mothers want more than survival. We want sustainability. We want abundance. We want options. We want lives that don’t require us to disappear in order to function. Mom Math is me navigating this in real time and inviting you to do it alongside me. Not perfectly.Not quietly.But intentionally. If this resonates, you’re in the right place. If you haven’t listened yet, Episode 1 of Mom Math is live now. I break down the hidden costs of motherhood: the time tax, the mental load, and the invisible labor we’ve been carrying without language for it. You can watch the full episode on YouTube [https://youtu.be/-078FEhtHG4] or listen right here . Get full access to Mom Math at lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe [https://lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Holding Space For Misinformation

This week on Let’s Figure This Out, we’re diving into the unexpected parallels between Wicked and today’s political dynamics. From Elphaba’s fight against fear-mongering to the Wizard’s smoke-and-mirrors control, this episode unpacks misinformation, its consequences, and how we can combat it. [0:00 - 1:00] Intro * Why Wicked is more than entertainment—it’s a mirror for our world. [1:01 - 4:00] The Characters of Oz, IRL * Elphaba: Marginalized communities rising above. * Madame Morrible: Elon Musk’s power play. * The Wizard: Donald Trump’s illusion of leadership. * Glinda: A reflection of us all. [4:01 - 6:00] Misinformation Unpacked * Misinformation vs. disinformation: What’s the difference? * Historical examples, from Roman times to social media today. [6:01 - 9:00] Real-World Impact * How propaganda influences elections and erodes trust in institutions. * The dangers of echo chambers and confirmation bias. [9:01 - 11:00] Your Voice Matters * Personal reflections on IVF, reproductive rights, and advocacy. [11:07 - 17:45] Why Misinformation Matters * Real-world consequences: undermining trust in institutions, influencing elections, and perpetuating systemic inequalities. * The role of echo chambers and algorithms in reinforcing biases. [17:46 - 20:23] Personal Reflections * How misinformation has affected marginalized groups and your journey as an IVF mama advocating for reproductive rights. [20:24 - 25:50] Fighting Back * Tips for combating misinformation: fact-check rigorously, lean into your authenticity, and engage in advocacy. * Stories of connection and learning from advocacy events like Trending Up and the DNC. [25:51 - End] Knowledge Is Power * A call to action: Start conversations online and offline to challenge ignorance and make a difference. Get full access to Mom Math at lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe [https://lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Why We Lost

In this episode, we’re diving into the hard truths about this election—the wins, the losses, and what it all really means for us. We’ll explore how, despite showing up in record numbers, Black women continue to face the same frustrating question: who’s truly fighting for us? We’ll break down the numbers, confront the narratives, and discuss why some voters made contradictory choices. And I’ll get personal about why I took a step back, what that rest taught me, and how I’m bringing a new kind of resilience to the fight. Plus, we’re going to look at how misinformation, comfort, and bias played a bigger role than we may want to admit. So join me for a candid conversation on what it’ll take to protect our progress and keep pushing forward. Rest is resistance—but so is refusing to let this setback define us. Get full access to Mom Math at lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe [https://lifebymj.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]