Healing Doesn’t Always Feel Like Peace

That 40s Glow Up | Midlife Awakening, Reclamation & Loving Yourself

In this last episode of Season 1 of Note to Herself, we’re ending on a high note: That 40s Glow Up. You know the confidence, clarity, and freedom that shows up while you’re still healing, still evolving, and finally choosing yourself. This is the era where you come home to yourself— and let go of who you thought you had to be to fully embrace who you are. In this episode, we talk about: ✨ Why your 40s can feel like your most powerful era yet ✨ The difference between a midlife crisis and a midlife awakening ✨ How healing shows up as confidence, clarity, and self-trust ✨ Letting go of external validation and expectations ✨ Reinvention, curiosity, and trying new things at any age ✨ Redefining success beyond titles, promotions, and hustle ✨ Choosing peace, balance, and alignment over pressure ✨ Why women are thriving—on their own terms Plus: ✈️ A very real travel rant (no chain restaurants, no shared hotel rooms 😅) 💎 The “little luxuries” that are actually changing our lives ❤️ The moment you realize… oh, I actually like my life 💌 This episode is for you if: ✨ You’re in your 30s or 40s and feel a shift happening ✨ You’re craving more freedom, clarity, and peace ✨ You’re done performing and ready to live life on your terms ✨ You’re asking: “What do I want the next 40 years to look like?” 💌 Join Our Community If you'd like to watch this and other episodes, we invite you to subscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself [https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself] Want deeper reflection prompts and weekly intention-setting? Sign up for Noted, our free weekly newsletter: 👉 https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com [https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com/] Follow, be social, and engage with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself [https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself] __________________________________________________ Special thanks to the talented collaborators who help bring Note to Herself to life: 🎬 Production: R. Cadell Cook — House Cat Creative Directing, Filming, Audio & Post Production https://housecatcreative.com/ [https://housecatcreative.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/ [https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/] 💐 Studio Set Design & Filming Location: Patricia Sterling — Sincerely PS Events and Design https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/ [https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/ [https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/] 💄 Makeup: Denyelle D. Beauty https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/ [https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/ [https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/]

Protect Your Peace Without Checking Out | Navigating Chaos, News Overload, & Real Life Boundaries

The world feels like a lot right now. So how do you stay informed without losing your peace? In this episode of Note to Herself, we’re having an honest conversation about news overload, outrage, and what it looks like to protect your peace in real time. It’s about figuring out how to stay aware, empathetic, and grounded—without becoming overwhelmed, anxious, or emotionally drained. We talk about the tension so many of us feel right now: 👉 wanting to care, but feeling helpless 👉 wanting to stay informed, but feeling overloaded 👉 wanting to do the “right” thing, but not even knowing what that is anymore From boycotts and burnout to doomscrolling and decision fatigue… this episode is about finding your personal boundaries in a world that never stops. 💬 In this episode, we talk about: ✨ How to stay informed without spiraling ✨ The emotional weight of constant breaking news ✨ Boycotts, moral pressure, and decision fatigue ✨ The reality of feeling overwhelmed and powerless ✨ “Observe, don’t absorb” as a practice ✨ Why protecting your peace is necessary—not selfish ✨ The importance of media literacy and vetting information ✨ Focusing on what you can control (starting locally) ✨ Giving yourself grace when you need to step back 🔥 Real conversations about: Doomscrolling and nervous system regulation The pressure to always be “on” and aware Navigating politics, empathy, and everyday life Finding balance between awareness and peace 💌 Join Our Community If you'd like to watch this and other episodes, we invite you to subscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself [https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself] Want deeper reflection prompts and weekly intention-setting? Sign up for Noted, our free weekly newsletter: 👉 https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com [https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com/] Follow, be social, and engage with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself [https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself] __________________________________________________ Special thanks to the talented collaborators who help bring Note to Herself to life: 🎬 Production: R. Cadell Cook — House Cat Creative Directing, Filming, Audio & Post Production https://housecatcreative.com/ [https://housecatcreative.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/ [https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/] 💐 Studio Set Design & Filming Location: Patricia Sterling — Sincerely PS Events and Design https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/ [https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/ [https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/] 💄 Makeup: Denyelle D. Beauty https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/ [https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/ [https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/]

Healing Doesn’t Always Feel Like Peace

Healing doesn’t always feel peaceful. In this episode of Note to Herself, we talk about emotional healing, trauma, church hurt, self-abandonment, boundaries, and what it really takes to reconnect with yourself. Sometimes healing looks like grief, accountability, discomfort, nervous system regulation, and finally telling yourself the truth. Listener Note / Trigger Warning: This episode includes conversation around healing and grief, self-abandonment, nervous system regulation, emotional maturity, family wounds, toxic relationships, religious trauma, boundaries and self-trust, sexual trauma, and abusive relationships. Please take care of yourself while listening. In this episode, we talk about: ✨ Why healing is a lifelong commitment, not a “healed era” ✨ The difference between self-care and actual healing ✨ Accountability without self-blame ✨ How trauma can disconnect you from your body ✨ Small ways to create safety in your body and daily routines ✨ Church hurt, spiritual confusion, and religious trauma ✨ Parenting differently while healing your own childhood wounds ✨ Giving grace to your parents while still honoring your truth ✨ What to do when you’re growing but the people around you are not ✨ Boundaries, discernment, and emotional maturity Favorite Takeaway: “Healing is not an era. It’s a lifelong commitment.” Journal Prompt: Where in your life are you being asked to heal for real — not just soothe yourself temporarily? 💌 Join Our Community If you'd like to watch this and other episodes, we invite you to subscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself [https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself] Want deeper reflection prompts and weekly intention-setting? Sign up for Noted, our free weekly newsletter: 👉 https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com [https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com/] Follow, be social, and engage with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself [https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself] __________________________________________________ Special thanks to the talented collaborators who help bring Note to Herself to life: 🎬 Production: R. Cadell Cook — House Cat Creative Directing, Filming, Audio & Post Production https://housecatcreative.com/ [https://housecatcreative.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/ [https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/] 💐 Studio Set Design & Filming Location: Patricia Sterling — Sincerely PS Events and Design https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/ [https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/ [https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/] 💄 Makeup: Denyelle D. Beauty https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/ [https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/ [https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/]

Friendship Breakups: Why Losing Friends As You Get Older Feels So Different

Nobody warns you that some of your hardest breakups won’t be romantic, they’ll be friendships. In this episode of Note to Herself, Kia and Krystel get honest about friendship breakups; the kind that don’t come with drama or betrayal, just distance, growth, and change. Losing friends as you get older doesn’t always look like a fight. It could look like unanswered calls that go longer and longer in between returns. Or outgrowing each other. Or realizing you no longer fit in spaces you once called home. In this conversation, we explore what it really means to navigate adult friendships (especially in your 30s and 40s) when your values shift, your boundaries get clearer, and your capacity for surface-level connection gets smaller. We talk about: ✨ Why friendship breakups can feel just as painful as romantic ones ✨ The grief of growing apart without closure ✨ Letting go of people-pleasing and overextending in friendships ✨ The difference between low maintenance and low intimacy ✨ Why some friendships fade when you start doing the inner work ✨ How to define what kind of friend you want to be—and receive Kia shares her journey from wanting to belong at any cost to building friendships rooted in reciprocity, depth, and emotional safety. Krystel reflects on boundaries, low-maintenance friendships, and the reality that not every friendship is meant to last forever. Sometimes the most honest thing you can say is: We didn’t fall out, we just simply grew apart. That comes with its own kind of grief. 💌 Join Our Community If you'd like to watch this and other episodes, we invite you to subscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself [https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself] Want deeper reflection prompts and weekly intention-setting? Sign up for Noted, our free weekly newsletter: 👉 https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com [https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com/] Follow, be social, and engage with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself [https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself] __________________________________________________ Special thanks to the talented collaborators who help bring Note to Herself to life: 🎬 Production: R. Cadell Cook — House Cat Creative Directing, Filming, Audio & Post Production https://housecatcreative.com/ [https://housecatcreative.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/ [https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/] 💐 Studio Set Design & Filming Location: Patricia Sterling — Sincerely PS Events and Design https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/ [https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/ [https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/] 💄 Makeup: Denyelle D. Beauty https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/ [https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/ [https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/]

Woman, Don't Abandon Yourself

Being a good mother, daughter, friend, or partner shouldn’t require disappearing from who you are and what you want from life. In Episode 4 of the Note to Herself podcast, Kia and Krystel get honest about something many women experience but rarely name: self-abandonment. This conversation explores what it looks like to slowly lose yourself in caregiving, expectations, and the pressure to be everything for everyone— and how to begin reclaiming who you are without guilt. From motherhood and co-parenting to relationships, routines, and even the small ways we ignore our own preferences, this episode unpacks how self-abandonment happens over time and, most importantly: what it takes to interrupt that pattern. They talk about: ✨ Why mom guilt isn’t something you have to carry ✨ The importance of boundaries in parenting, relationships, and everyday life ✨ How women are often conditioned to over-function and over-give ✨ The difference between doing things out of joy vs obligation ✨ Why rest, stillness, and “doing nothing” are essential—not indulgent ✨ How to recognize when you’re running from yourself instead of sitting with yourself Kia shares how reconnecting with what she actually likes (not what she’s been told to like) became a turning point. Krystel opens up about releasing mom guilt and redefining what it means to show up fully, without losing herself in the process. This episode is a reminder that: 👏🏾 You don’t have to disappear to be loved. 👏🏾 You don’t have to overextend to be valued. 👏🏾 And you don’t have to abandon yourself to take care of everyone else. __________________________________________________ 💌 Join Our Community If you'd like to watch this and other episodes, we invite you to subscribe to our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself [https://www.youtube.com/@NotetoHerself] Want deeper reflection prompts and weekly intention-setting? Sign up for Noted, our free weekly newsletter: 👉 https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com [https://www.notetoherselfpodcast.com/] Follow, be social, and engage with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/notetoherselfpodcast] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@notetoherselfpodcast] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself [https://www.facebook.com/notetoherself] __________________________________________________ Special thanks to the talented collaborators who help bring Note to Herself to life: 🎬 Production: R. Cadell Cook — House Cat Creative Directing, Filming, Audio & Post Production https://housecatcreative.com/ [https://housecatcreative.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/ [https://www.instagram.com/rcadellcook/] 💐 Studio Set Design & Filming Location: Patricia Sterling — Sincerely PS Events and Design https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/ [https://www.sincerelypseventsanddesign.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/ [https://www.instagram.com/sincerelypseventsanddesign/] 💄 Makeup: Denyelle D. Beauty https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/ [https://www.denyelledbeauty.com/] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/ [https://www.instagram.com/denyelledbeauty/]