Say This Not That

The Way You Talk to Yourself Is Costing You More Than You Think

32 min · 14 de may de 2026
Portada del episodio The Way You Talk to Yourself Is Costing You More Than You Think

Descripción

In this episode of Say This, Not That, workplace wellbeing expert and keynote speaker Dilan Gomih shares powerful insights on the connection between movement, mindset, and performance. Drawing from her experience on a high-pressure Wall Street trading floor, Dilan explains how shifting her perspective on fitness—from a “nice-to-have” to a “must-have”—completely transformed how she showed up in her career and life. Her core philosophy, “movement makes your mind better,” reframes exercise as a mental performance tool rather than just a physical outcome. The conversation dives deep into the language we use with ourselves and others. Dilan breaks down harmful phrases like “I should” and “why don’t you just…,” revealing how they create pressure, shame, and oversimplification. Instead, she offers practical mindset shifts like embracing the word “yet,” practicing intentional self-talk, and reframing challenges as opportunities with “I get to.” These small but powerful language changes can dramatically impact confidence, resilience, and personal growth. Beyond tactics, this episode explores a deeper philosophy of living—one rooted in intentionality, self-awareness, and choosing joy. Dilan shares how her upbringing, personal experiences, and professional journey shaped her ability to filter external noise, trust her instincts, and make decisions without regret. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or overly critical of yourself, this conversation offers a refreshing and actionable perspective on how to think, move, and live better.

Comentarios

0

Sé la primera persona en comentar

¡Regístrate ahora y únete a la comunidad de Say This Not That!

Prueba gratis

Empieza 7 días de prueba

$99 / mes después de la prueba. · Cancela cuando quieras.

  • Podcasts solo en Podimo
  • 20 horas de audiolibros al mes
  • Podcast gratuitos

Todos los episodios

5 episodios

episode Feeling Lost? This “Liminal Space” Mindset Will Change Your Life artwork

Feeling Lost? This “Liminal Space” Mindset Will Change Your Life

This episode dives deep into the unconventional journey of Yael Gavish, a former technologist and startup leader who walked away from a “dream” career in tech to pursue a life rooted in creativity and purpose. After years working in high-powered roles at major companies and launching startups, Yael found herself deeply unfulfilled—despite outward success. Her story explores what happens when you realize the path you’ve been following isn’t actually yours, and what it takes to start over. Through her journey, Yael introduces the concept of the “liminal space”—a period of uncertainty where you don’t yet know where you’re going, but you know where you don’t want to be. Rather than rushing to escape that discomfort, she argues that learning to sit in it is the key to discovering true purpose. The conversation highlights the importance of experimentation, self-reflection, and resisting societal pressure to conform to predefined definitions of success. The episode also explores how others can support someone going through change, emphasizing curiosity over problem-solving and encouragement over fear-based advice. Yael shares powerful insights on creativity, identity, and the courage to share your work—even when it feels uncomfortable. Whether you're questioning your career, exploring a new path, or simply seeking a more meaningful life, this conversation offers a refreshing and deeply human perspective on what it means to truly live on your own terms. * finding your purpose * career change inspiration * leaving corporate job * liminal space meaning * personal growth mindset * creative career journey * quitting tech job * how to find passion * self discovery journey * living authentically

28 de may de 202651 min
episode The Way You Talk to Yourself Is Costing You More Than You Think artwork

The Way You Talk to Yourself Is Costing You More Than You Think

In this episode of Say This, Not That, workplace wellbeing expert and keynote speaker Dilan Gomih shares powerful insights on the connection between movement, mindset, and performance. Drawing from her experience on a high-pressure Wall Street trading floor, Dilan explains how shifting her perspective on fitness—from a “nice-to-have” to a “must-have”—completely transformed how she showed up in her career and life. Her core philosophy, “movement makes your mind better,” reframes exercise as a mental performance tool rather than just a physical outcome. The conversation dives deep into the language we use with ourselves and others. Dilan breaks down harmful phrases like “I should” and “why don’t you just…,” revealing how they create pressure, shame, and oversimplification. Instead, she offers practical mindset shifts like embracing the word “yet,” practicing intentional self-talk, and reframing challenges as opportunities with “I get to.” These small but powerful language changes can dramatically impact confidence, resilience, and personal growth. Beyond tactics, this episode explores a deeper philosophy of living—one rooted in intentionality, self-awareness, and choosing joy. Dilan shares how her upbringing, personal experiences, and professional journey shaped her ability to filter external noise, trust her instincts, and make decisions without regret. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stuck, or overly critical of yourself, this conversation offers a refreshing and actionable perspective on how to think, move, and live better.

14 de may de 202632 min
episode What People Get Wrong About Supporting Someone Who’s Dying artwork

What People Get Wrong About Supporting Someone Who’s Dying

When someone you care about is suffering, grieving, or facing the end of life, finding the “right” words can feel impossible. In this episode of Say This, Not That, palliative care nurse practitioner Regan Marooney shares what she has learned from years spent sitting beside patients and families during life’s hardest moments—and why sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is simply be present. Regan works in palliative care at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, helping patients manage pain, navigate complex medical decisions, and face the emotional realities of serious illness. In this conversation, she explains the often-misunderstood difference between hospice and palliative care, what “quality of life” really means in medicine, and the communication framework clinicians use when responding to grief, fear, and anger. Along the way, Regan shares deeply personal stories from the hospital—moments of heartbreak, humanity, humor, and profound love. She also reveals common phrases people say that unintentionally make things worse, including one simple word she wishes we could eliminate entirely. If you've ever struggled with what to say when someone is hurting, this conversation offers compassionate, practical guidance on how to show up when it matters most.

9 de may de 202645 min
episode Why Difficult Conversations Feel Terrifying artwork

Why Difficult Conversations Feel Terrifying

Difficult conversations are something most of us try to avoid—but according to negotiation expert Bob Bordone, avoiding conflict often creates even bigger problems. In this episode, Bob shares the concept of conflict resilience: the ability to stay present during uncomfortable disagreements while still communicating effectively and listening with curiosity. Drawing on decades of experience teaching negotiation and mediation, he explains why developing this skill is essential for stronger relationships, better leadership, and more productive conversations. Bob dives into the psychology behind why people struggle to say the right thing in tense situations. From the brain’s natural fight-or-flight response to the power of neuroplasticity, he explains how our communication habits are formed—and how we can retrain our brains to respond differently. The conversation also explores practical strategies for navigating tough moments, including practicing difficult conversations out loud and using physical exercises to clarify competing thoughts before entering a discussion. The episode also highlights the importance of deep listening and curiosity during disagreements. Rather than focusing only on winning arguments or reaching immediate resolution, Bob explains how meaningful engagement in conflict can actually strengthen relationships and open the door to deeper understanding—even when people ultimately disagree. If you’ve ever struggled to find the right words in a difficult moment, this conversation offers practical insights into communicating with more clarity, empathy, and confidence. conflict resolution difficult conversations communication skills negotiation skills conflict management how to handle conflict deep listening active listening hard conversations relationship communication

17 de mar de 202648 min
episode The subtle mistakes that create relational distance | Say This Not That artwork

The subtle mistakes that create relational distance | Say This Not That

What do you say when someone you care about is going through something painful, and you have no idea how to respond? In this inaugural episode, Kristen Leone sits down with her close friend Katie O’Malley to unpack one of life’s most uncomfortable but important challenges: showing up for others in difficult moments. From losing a loved one to illness, job loss, and everyday struggles, this conversation dives into the real impact words can have—both good and bad. Sharing deeply, deeply personal stories, Kristen and Katie explore the difference between connection and unintended harm. Why do phrases like “everything happens for a reason” fall flat? What actually helps someone feel supported? And how can you avoid putting pressure on someone when they’re already overwhelmed? This episode introduces simple but powerful frameworks—like choosing presence over perfection, avoiding curiosity-driven questions, and understanding emotional “rings” of support. Beyond words, this discussion highlights the often-overlooked power of action. Sometimes the most meaningful support doesn’t come from what you say—but what you do. Whether it’s sending a simple text, dropping off a meal, or just showing up without expectations, you’ll walk away with practical, usable ways to better support the people in your life. If you’ve ever hesitated to reach out because you didn’t know what to say, this episode is for you. Chapters & Timestamps 00:00 – Intro 00:00:42 – Welcome  00:02:06 – Learning the Hard Way: What Not to Say 00:10:05 – Awareness First: Why Saying Something Matters 00:18:23 – Actions Over Words: Showing Up Without Asking 00:26:17 – Curiosity vs. Compassion: Asking Better Questions 00:33:00 – Why We Rely on Scripts (and How to Change Them) 00:41:00 – Navigating Awkward or Unexpected Conversations 00:48:30 – The Balance Between Presence and Pressure 00:51:15 – Final Reflections & Key Mindset Shifts 00:52:30 – Closing Thoughts & Outro Keywords GriefEmpathySupportComfortCommunicationConnectionLossHealingPresenceCompassionListeningBoundariesAwarenessKindnessRelationshipsConversationEmotionsVulnerabilityUnderstandingCareSupporting

9 de mar de 202652 min