I Quit Social Media, Fell Through a Restaurant Floor & Questioned AI Ethics | Presence, Parenting, Privacy, Smashing Pumpkins & Trying to Stay Human

Brian Holwerda on Blackout Party, Remembering Tim Lowman aka Low Volts, The Casbah, AI Music, San Diego Scene & Escaping To Montana

EP41 → Brian Holwerda, Blackout Party, Dark Winged Bird & The Weird Roads That Lead Us Back To Art this week, i’m joined by singer-songwriter Brian Holwerda… former Blackout Party frontman, Montana wilderness dweller, fellow music obsessive, and one of the genuinely kind humans to come out of the San Diego music scene…we talk about the old Casbah days… hauling gear through alleyways… “bro-adies”… photographing bands before iphones existed… and that very specific era of San Diego music where everybody showed up for each other, even if there were only fifteen people in the room… we get into Brian’s early years growing up in the Bay Area, chasing music in Los Angeles during the eyeliner-and-demo-deal era, eventually landing in Nashville, and finally finding peace living out in Montana surrounded by rivers, bison, horses, dogs, snakes, and actual silence… a big part of this conversation centers around our friend TiLo / Tim Lowman… his creativity, warmth, humor, flute playing, Low Volts, motorcycles, community, and the enormous impact he had on so many people around him. we talk grief… memory… getting older… and the strange reality that sometimes you don’t realize how much a person mattered until they’re suddenly gone… we also spend a lot of time talking about art and authenticity in the age of algorithms… AI-generated music… social media… touring… virality… and why maybe having twenty real people in a room still means more than a million passive clicks online… there are also tangents involving Gene Wilder, giant african land snails, crocodiles escaping during Bangkok floods, pigeon hospitals, Montana ranch life, The Cure, Smashing Pumpkins, parenting, songwriting, and why both of us seem increasingly interested in disappearing into the woods to avoid excessive peopling… A conversation about music, memory, friendship, loss, and the weird roads that somehow still lead us back to art… Sayonara Cupcake is a community for music + art lovers. We share stories, poetry, music, and things worth falling down the rabbit hole for — no monetization, ever. 🫶📍 Find us on Instagram → [https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/](https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/)(where the community lives)🔗 Everything in one place → [https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake](https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake)• Shared under Fair Use (17 U.S. Code §107)• All rights belong to their respective owners• If something’s yours and needs credit (or removal), just reach out — we’re nice, promise

Nancy Guthrie Case — A Former Detective Breaks Down What We Know, Surveillance Gaps & What It Means

EP40 → The Nancy Guthrie Case — A Former Detective’s Perspective, Surveillance & Modern Investigations this week, i’m joined by my brother — a former police sergeant and detective with 29 years in law enforcement — and we take a closer look at the nancy guthrie case… this isn’t a news breakdown or play-by-play… it came up because i had a feeling people in this community might have questions, and i wanted to bring in someone who could offer real perspective from experience. he also brings a unique lens, having worked in mesa, arizona — about two hours from where this case took place — so we’re able to talk through terrain, conditions, climate, and how cases like this can play out in that specific environment. we walk through what’s been shared publicly, how investigations typically work, and why things can look one way from the outside but feel very different from the inside. we get into early response, how scenes are handled, and why those first hours matter so much, along with how information is sometimes held back for reasons people don’t always see. we also talk about surveillance — ring cameras, missing gaps, and the reality that even with technology everywhere, things still aren’t as airtight as people assume. the conversation expands into how different agencies work together, what roles actually look like behind the scenes, and how experience, resources, timing, and communication all play a part in how a case develops. we touch on AI and misinformation, and how easy it is now to be convinced of something that isn’t real — which affects not just the public, but how cases are understood in real time. we talk politics… without getting political — no sides, just perspective — and underneath all of it, this comes back to something human: a missing person, a family waiting for answers, and the reality of not knowing. we also get into practical things like home security, awareness, and simple steps people can take to better protect themselves and their families. this isn’t about having all the answers… it’s about asking better questions and understanding the complexity behind what we’re seeing. Sayonara Cupcake is a community for music + art lovers. We share stories, poetry, music, and things worth falling down the rabbit hole for — no monetization, ever. 🫶 📍 Find us on Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/ [https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/] (where the community lives) 🔗 Everything in one place → https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake [https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake] • Shared under Fair Use (17 U.S. Code §107) • All rights belong to their respective owners • If something’s yours and needs credit (or removal), just reach out — we’re nice, promise

AI, Truth, War & The Illusion of Reality (Without Getting Political)

EP39 → LV & Marty: AI, Truth, War, Algorithms & The Illusion of Reality this week, it’s me and marty… and this one goes everywhere… it starts simple… health, routines, getting older… trying to hold onto discipline while the world feels like it’s speeding up… and then pretty quickly… it turns into something bigger…we get into AI… not just what it can do… but how fast it’s moving… making music, solving problems, teaching, creating… and also confusing the line between real and fake… to the point where you can’t always trust what you’re seeing anymore… videos, news, even people… everything starts to feel a little uncertain…that opens the door to a bigger conversation about truth… perception… and how two people can look at the exact same thing and see something completely different… not metaphorically… literally… and what that means for how we understand the world right now…from there… it gets heavier… war, geopolitics, fear, uncertainty… and yeah… we talk politics… without getting political…it’s less about sides… and more about the feeling… what people are actually experiencing versus what we’re being told… the distortion of information… how stories shift as they move… and how easy it is to lose clarity in the noise…we talk about the mood… in the u.s., abroad, online… the anger, the tension, the sense that things are shifting… maybe faster than we’re ready for… and whether we’re heading toward something bigger… or just stuck in a cycle that keeps repeating…then it swings back… into something more human… taking care of aging parents… raising kids in a world that doesn’t feel stable… trying to stay present when everything around you is pulling for your attention… and the quiet realization that time… is the only thing that actually matters…it dips into social media… algorithms… how they shape what we believe… what we see… what we think we discovered on our own… and how easy it is to get pulled into a version of reality that isn’t the full picture…and somewhere in all of it… there’s this thread…how do you stay grounded… when everything feels uncertain…what do you trust… when everything can be manipulated…and how do you hold onto what matters… when the noise never stops…like always… it branches… but it circles back… to something simple…focus… perspective… and choosing where your attention actually goes… because that might be the only real control we have left……oh—and somewhere in all of this… you finally get to hear the legendary story of the night of the eagles…Sayonara Cupcake is a community for music + art lovers. We share stories, poetry, music, and things worth falling down the rabbit hole for — no monetization, ever. 🫶📍 Find us on Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/(where the community lives)🔗 Everything in one place → https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake• Shared under Fair Use (17 U.S. Code §107)• All rights belong to their respective owners• If something’s yours and needs credit (or removal), just reach out — we’re nice, promise

The Surveillance Illusion, AI, Culture & The Nancy Guthrie Case (Privacy, Trust & Society)

EP38 → Surveillance, AI, Culture & The Nancy Guthrie Case this week, it’s me and desmond again… and this one starts with the nancy guthrie case — a high-profile disappearance with some real gaps… limited surveillance, missing footage, and a lot that doesn’t quite add up… but that’s really just the entry point… because pretty quickly, it turns into a bigger conversation… about surveillance, privacy, and the strange illusion that we’re constantly being watched… when in reality… the system isn’t nearly as airtight as we think… we get into law enforcement decisions, public communication, and how messy things can get behind the scenes… especially when people assume there’s more clarity than there actually is… then it shifts into culture… community safety, trust, and the difference between how things feel in thailand versus the west… neighbor dynamics, shared spaces, and what happens when people actually look out for each other… versus when everything becomes more individual and disconnected… like always… it branches… into social media, authenticity, and how people present themselves now… whether younger generations are more real… or just better at curating the illusion… and how algorithms quietly shape what we think we discovered on our own… there’s also a detour (because of course there is)… into bizarre global competitions, weird human traditions, and the kind of stuff that reminds you the world is still… very human… but underneath all of it… there’s a thread… trust… in systems, in technology, in each other… and what happens when that trust starts to feel a little unstable… we get into AI… not in the abstract… but in the everyday… how it’s already helping with organization, learning, and clarity… while also raising questions about dependence, ethics, and emotional connection… it dips into mental health… how to deal with difficult people… trolling, social friction, microaggressions… and when to engage versus when to just… step back and protect your peace… and then it stretches out… into bigger reflections… how we spend our time… how quickly things change… and what society might look like hundreds of years from now… somewhere in all of that… we circle back to something simple… focus… being present… not getting pulled into every piece of noise around you… because sometimes… the world feels overwhelming not because everything is happening… but because we think we’re supposed to pay attention to all of it… and maybe we’re not… Sayonara Cupcake is a community for music + art lovers. We share stories, poetry, music, and things worth falling down the rabbit hole for — no monetization, ever. 🫶 📍 Find us on Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/ [https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/] (where the community lives) 🔗 Everything in one place → https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake [https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake] • Shared under Fair Use (17 U.S. Code §107) • All rights belong to their respective owners • If something’s yours and needs credit (or removal), just reach out — we’re nice, promise

I Quit Social Media, Fell Through a Restaurant Floor & Questioned AI Ethics | Presence, Parenting, Privacy, Smashing Pumpkins & Trying to Stay Human

EP37 → AI, Authenticity & Trying to Stay Human This week, it’s me and Desmond — and this one moves between AI, music, culture… and the general weirdness of being human right now… we start with AI… music production, vocal manipulation… what it can do… what it can’t… and the bigger question underneath it all — what even counts as “real” anymore? from there, it expands… AI in everyday life — smart homes, creative tools… the convenience of it… and the ethical gray areas that come with letting it get closer and closer to how we live… then it shifts into culture… cancel culture, public figures, double standards… where accountability ends and performative outrage begins… and why owning mistakes should open conversation… not shut it down… music runs through everything… how your taste gets shaped — by family, by where you grow up… how discovery used to happen… versus now, with algorithms deciding what you hear next… we talk about luck… timing… and the simple joy of sharing music with someone who actually gets it… and what younger generations might be gaining… or missing… in a world where everything is curated for them… but this one also goes more personal… stepping away from social media… being more present… what it means to actually show up for the people in your life while everything else keeps pulling for your attention… we get into parenting, privacy, and whether kids should have a say in how their lives are shared online… and how something that feels harmless now might not feel that way later… from there it spirals (naturally)… into the ethics of AI… what happens when technology moves faster than the rules meant to guide it… who decides what’s okay… and whether accountability is even possible when everything can be created, altered, or denied… and because this is us… it doesn’t stay serious the whole time… there’s a detour into irrational fears becoming weirdly real… falling through the floor of a restaurant… chaotic travel stories… concert experiences, including Desmond’s first Smashing Pumpkins show… and how quickly perception can shift when you actually understand what you’re seeing… we circle back through music, memory, and the strange way everything connects… and underneath all of it… is the same question… how do you try to understand the world… without completely losing your mind in it? Sayonara Cupcake is a community for music + art lovers. We share stories, poetry, music, and things worth falling down the rabbit hole for — no monetization, ever. 🫶 📍 Find us on Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/ [https://www.instagram.com/sayonaracupcake/] (where the community lives) 🔗 Everything in one place → https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake [https://linktr.ee/sayonaracupcake] • Shared under Fair Use (17 U.S. Code §107) • All rights belong to their respective owners • If something’s yours and needs credit (or removal), just reach out — we’re nice, promis