What Now? Release or Renew?

Dignity, Trauma, and Leadership in a Hurting World with Staci Olister and Mary Coughlin

Join the dialogue - text your questions, insights, and feedback to The Dignity Lab podcast. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2287214/fan_mail/new] In this conversation on The Dignity Lab, guest host and neonatologist Dr. Staci Olister brings together trauma-informed care expert Mary Coughlin and host Dr. Jennifer Griggs to explore how trauma and dignity are deeply intertwined in healthcare and beyond. They trace the evolution of trauma from a narrow focus on physical injury to a broader, lived experience that overwhelms a person’s capacity to cope. They define dignity as our inherent, unearned worth—no more and no less than anyone else’s—and extend this to organizations, non-human animals, and the Earth itself. Dignity violations—exclusion, humiliation, lack of safety, medical gaslighting, and structural injustice—are at the root of much of the trauma experienced by patients and clinicians. Mary describes how we can “build the buffering” for people in overwhelming situations, rather than only “summing up the suffering.” Jennifer offers a pathway for reclaiming dignity: naming a dignity violation, affirming a person’s worth, seeking accountability and repair where possible, and shifting from “me” (the one to whom something happened) to “I” (the agent/creator) and ultimately to “Thou,” seeing the sacred dignity in others, including those who have harmed us. They also address shame as an emotion that thrives in silence and secrecy. They examine how dehumanizing language, hierarchical culture, business models of productivity, and electronic health records can undermine trauma-informed, dignity-centered care. The episode closes with an invitation to join Mary and Jennifer for an immersive, trauma-informed, dignity-centered retreat in Ireland, focused on embodied leadership, radical listening, reflective writing, and nervous system regulation. Takeaways * Trauma is a lived experience that touches body, mind, spirit, and community * Dignity is our inherent, unearned worth, extending to humans, organizations, and the Earth * Trauma and dignity violations are interwoven in healthcare and beyond * Trauma-informed care principles are practical ways to enact dignity in everyday practice * Shame and secrecy fuel systemic disconnection in healthcare cultures * Patients, families, and clinicians are routinely exposed to everyday dignity violations * We reclaim dignity by naming harm, affirming worth, and seeking accountability and repair * Healing involves shifting from “me” to “I” to “Thou” in our stories and leadership * Dehumanizing language, business models, and electronic recor Exploring what it means to live and lead with dignity at work, in our families, in our communities, and in the world. What is dignity? How can we honor the dignity of others? And how can we repair and reclaim our dignity after harm? Tune in to hear stories about violations of dignity and ways in which we heal, forgive, and make choices about how we show up in a chaotic and fractured world. Hosted by physician and coach Jennifer Griggs. For more information on the podcast, please visit www.thedignitylab.com [https://thedignitylab.com/]. For more information on podcast host Dr. Jennifer Griggs, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/]. For additional free resources, including the periodic table of dignity elements, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/]. The Dignity Lab is an affiliate of Bookshop.org and will receive 10% of the purchase price when you click through and make a purchase. This supports our production and hosting costs. Bookshop.org doesn’t earn money off bookstore sales, all profits go to independent bookstores. We encourage our listeners to purchase books through Bookshop.org for this reason.

Coffee with Vanessa and Jennifer

Join the dialogue - text your questions, insights, and feedback to The Dignity Lab podcast. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2287214/fan_mail/new] In this episode, Jennifer and Vanessa deepen their conversation on healing from past hurts, exploring forgiveness, the importance of bodily awareness, and the journey from victimhood to creator. They share personal stories, insights from their season of solo episodes, and tease upcoming season themes on dignity. Main Topics Covered * The role of forgiveness and its alternatives in healing * Recognizing and honoring emotions in the forgiveness process * Bodily awareness as a tool for understanding readiness to forgive * The significance of physical reactions like lying on the floor as part of emotional processing * Shifting from victim to creator: acknowledging participation and reclaiming dignity * The metaphor of calling back one’s dignity as a hawk * The importance of positive emotions like hope and joy in healing * Navigating the complex process of forgiveness across different ages and circumstances Exploring what it means to live and lead with dignity at work, in our families, in our communities, and in the world. What is dignity? How can we honor the dignity of others? And how can we repair and reclaim our dignity after harm? Tune in to hear stories about violations of dignity and ways in which we heal, forgive, and make choices about how we show up in a chaotic and fractured world. Hosted by physician and coach Jennifer Griggs. For more information on the podcast, please visit www.thedignitylab.com [https://thedignitylab.com/]. For more information on podcast host Dr. Jennifer Griggs, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/]. For additional free resources, including the periodic table of dignity elements, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/]. The Dignity Lab is an affiliate of Bookshop.org and will receive 10% of the purchase price when you click through and make a purchase. This supports our production and hosting costs. Bookshop.org doesn’t earn money off bookstore sales, all profits go to independent bookstores. We encourage our listeners to purchase books through Bookshop.org for this reason.

What Now? Release or Renew?

Join the dialogue - text your questions, insights, and feedback to The Dignity Lab podcast. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2287214/fan_mail/new] This episode explores what comes after the work of healing, how to decide whether to renew or release a relationship with someone who caused harm. Jennifer walks through both paths, emphasizing that forgiveness does not require staying connected and that this decision is deeply personal. Renewal means creating a new relationship grounded in clarity, boundaries, and mutual capacity, not returning to what was. Release, on the other hand, is a conscious choice to free yourself from emotional ties to the person, even without apology or closure. The episode also acknowledges that feeling stuck is a natural part of the process and offers alternative paths forward, including dignity-based healing, acceptance, advocacy, and restorative justice. The core message: there is no single “right” next step, only the one that honors your dignity and allows you to move forward with intention. Takeaways *  After healing, you can renew or release the relationship.  *  Forgiveness does not require continued connection.  *  Renewal means creating a new relationship, not returning to the old one.  *  Renewal requires clarity, boundaries, vulnerability, and mutual capacity.  *  Release means freeing yourself from emotional ties—not avoidance.  *  You can release even without apology, contact, or closure.  *  You can renew internally, even if the person is gone.  *  If you still feel intense anger or pain, more healing may be needed before release.  *  Feeling stuck is normal—healing is not linear.  * Alternatives to forgiveness include dignity, acceptance, advocacy, and justice. Resources * The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World [https://bookshop.org/a/102080/9780062203571] by Desmond Tutu * Dignity: Its Essential Role in Resolving Conflict [https://bookshop.org/a/102080/9780300261424] by Donna Hicks * The Principles of Psychology (1890) [https://bookshop.org/a/102080/9781974689378] by William James Exploring what it means to live and lead with dignity at work, in our families, in our communities, and in the world. What is dignity? How can we honor the dignity of others? And how can we repair and reclaim our dignity after harm? Tune in to hear stories about violations of dignity and ways in which we heal, forgive, and make choices about how we show up in a chaotic and fractured world. Hosted by physician and coach Jennifer Griggs. For more information on the podcast, please visit www.thedignitylab.com [https://thedignitylab.com/]. For more information on podcast host Dr. Jennifer Griggs, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/]. For additional free resources, including the periodic table of dignity elements, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/]. The Dignity Lab is an affiliate of Bookshop.org and will receive 10% of the purchase price when you click through and make a purchase. This supports our production and hosting costs. Bookshop.org doesn’t earn money off bookstore sales, all profits go to independent bookstores. We encourage our listeners to purchase books through Bookshop.org for this reason.

Reclaiming Your Dignity: No Forgiveness Required

Join the dialogue - text your questions, insights, and feedback to The Dignity Lab podcast. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2287214/fan_mail/new] This episode explores what it means to reclaim your dignity after harm—without requiring forgiveness, apology, or explanation. Jennifer shares her own profound shift in thinking about healing after harm. Healing comes from reclaiming your role as the subject of your story, rather than remaining the object of what was done to you. Reclaiming dignity means remembering your worth, releasing unhelpful patterns, and choosing how you want to move forward, independent of others’ actions. The core message: your dignity is unearned and non-negotiable. Healing begins when you stop waiting for others to repair what was broken and instead choose to lead your life from your own worth, values, and agency. Takeaways *  Dignity is inherent—it doesn’t need to be earned.  *  Healing doesn’t require forgiveness or apology.  *  Looking to others to affirm your worth keeps you stuck.  *  Common reactions (blame, gossip, victimhood) block healing.  *  Staying in the victim role limits growth.  *  Shift from “this happened to me” → “what do I choose next?”  *  This doesn’t excuse harm or abandon justice.  *  Letting go of others’ limitations creates freedom.  *  Lead from your true self—calm, clear, compassionate.  *  Reclaiming dignity = choosing your next chapter. Resources * Christian Cooper, Better Living through Birding [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_Cooper] Exploring what it means to live and lead with dignity at work, in our families, in our communities, and in the world. What is dignity? How can we honor the dignity of others? And how can we repair and reclaim our dignity after harm? Tune in to hear stories about violations of dignity and ways in which we heal, forgive, and make choices about how we show up in a chaotic and fractured world. Hosted by physician and coach Jennifer Griggs. For more information on the podcast, please visit www.thedignitylab.com [https://thedignitylab.com/]. For more information on podcast host Dr. Jennifer Griggs, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/]. For additional free resources, including the periodic table of dignity elements, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/]. The Dignity Lab is an affiliate of Bookshop.org and will receive 10% of the purchase price when you click through and make a purchase. This supports our production and hosting costs. Bookshop.org doesn’t earn money off bookstore sales, all profits go to independent bookstores. We encourage our listeners to purchase books through Bookshop.org for this reason.

The Impossible Question

Join the dialogue - text your questions, insights, and feedback to The Dignity Lab podcast. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2287214/fan_mail/new] This short episode explores "The Impossible Question": Why did they do it? Jennifer discusses why people universally seek reasons after experiencing harm, how this search can deepen emotional disorganization or shame, and why answers often do not heal. The core message: understanding others' motivations rarely brings resolution, since even those who inflicted harm may not fully grasp their own actions. Healing comes from letting go of the need to know why and shifting focus to recognizing unmet needs—both in ourselves and others. Takeaways * When harmed, most people instinctively ask "Why?" as a way to make meaning and organize their experience. * Not getting answers often triggers shame or confusion about one’s worth. * The search for motivation rarely helps—explanations, if available, don’t resolve pain and can leave us feeling worse. Many people, including those who cause harm, are unaware of their true motivations in the moment; naming deeper needs is often challenging. * Unmet needs—belonging, recognition, control, contribution, safety—often drive behavior, though the strategies to meet them may be unskillful and hurtful. * Accepting that you may never know why, and that the person who caused harm may not know either, helps release the grip of the impossible question. * Moving forward in healing involves shifting the focus from seeking reasons to accepting unmet needs and letting go. Listeners are encouraged to share this episode and explore additional resources on universal needs at www.thedignitylab.com. [about:blank] Exploring what it means to live and lead with dignity at work, in our families, in our communities, and in the world. What is dignity? How can we honor the dignity of others? And how can we repair and reclaim our dignity after harm? Tune in to hear stories about violations of dignity and ways in which we heal, forgive, and make choices about how we show up in a chaotic and fractured world. Hosted by physician and coach Jennifer Griggs. For more information on the podcast, please visit www.thedignitylab.com [https://thedignitylab.com/]. For more information on podcast host Dr. Jennifer Griggs, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/]. For additional free resources, including the periodic table of dignity elements, please visit https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/ [https://jennifergriggs.com/resources/]. The Dignity Lab is an affiliate of Bookshop.org and will receive 10% of the purchase price when you click through and make a purchase. This supports our production and hosting costs. Bookshop.org doesn’t earn money off bookstore sales, all profits go to independent bookstores. We encourage our listeners to purchase books through Bookshop.org for this reason.