Episode 23: Still In It, Pt. 1: I’m Not Healed — And That’s Scary

Episode 23: Still In It, Pt. 1: I’m Not Healed — And That’s Scary

We don’t talk enough about the space between trauma and “healed.” In this first episode of the Still In It mini series, I’m saying something out loud that feels uncomfortable but honest: I don’t think I’m healed. I thought healing would feel like peace. Like arrival. Like a version of me that no longer flinches when certain memories resurface. But that’s not my reality. In this episode, we talk about: * The pressure to look like you’ve “moved on” * What it feels like to still get triggered * Grieving the timeline you thought you’d be on * And why awareness might actually be what healing looks like This isn’t an episode from the finish line. It’s from the middle. If you’ve ever thought, “I should be further along by now,” this one is for you.

Episode 22: Okay, We’re Talking About It

This week, I’m sharing something I didn’t include when I talked about my health scare before. I’ve tested positive for HPV multiple times over the years - including right before I got pregnant with my daughter. What followed were abnormal Pap smears, a colposcopy, pre-cancerous results, and ultimately a LEEP procedure. HPV is incredibly common, but the shame around it is loud. So we’re talking about it. In this episode, I share what HPV actually is, what those procedures mean, and what it felt like to walk through medical vulnerability as a new mom. We talk about the kind of trauma that doesn’t look dramatic- the kind that lives in sterile rooms and “routine” procedures and how healing sometimes means listening to your body instead of minimizing it. If you’ve ever felt scared by a medical result, ashamed of a diagnosis, or disconnected from your body, this one’s for you.

Episode 21: The In-Between Days

Some days, there isn’t a big lesson. There isn’t clarity. There’s just honesty. In today’s episode, I talk about the kind of exhaustion that doesn’t come from lack of sleep — but from holding things together for too long. The quiet, low-energy days that don’t look like crisis, but don’t feel okay either. This is a conversation about emotional depletion, the pressure to always have insight while healing, and the permission to show up exactly as you are- even when you don’t “have it.” If you’re feeling unmotivated, disconnected, or like you’re stuck in the in-between, this episode is for you. You don’t need to fix anything today. You’re not behind. And you’re not alone.

Episode 20: Healing in Layers

Healing doesn’t happen all at once—and it doesn’t require telling the whole story before you’re ready. In this short solo episode, I build on last week’s conversation and talk about what it looks like to heal in layers: sharing parts of your story while honoring boundaries, pacing yourself through hard truths, and recognizing the difference between avoidance and readiness. BUT knowing that you ARE brave and you can share your stories. This episode isn’t about details—it’s about process. About learning how to move forward without forcing disclosure, and trusting that healing can still happen even when some parts remain unspoken for a little bit. If you’re in the in-between—knowing there’s more, but not ready to go there yet—this episode is for you.

Episode 19:Childhood, Restricted

In this episode, I share a high-level reflection on my childhood- one shaped by anger, control, and unpredictability. This isn’t a deep dive, and it isn’t every detail. It’s the version of the story I’m ready to tell right now. Growing up meant walking on eggshells, following rules that went far beyond behavior, and learning early that perfection felt safer than authenticity. Those experiences didn’t stay in childhood- they followed me into adulthood, shaping anxiety, control, and the way my nervous system learned to prepare for the worst. This episode is about naming patterns without reliving every moment. About understanding how early environments shape who we become and how awareness can be the first step toward doing things differently. If you grew up in a home where safety felt conditional, this one’s for you. As always, I love you. You are loved. You are not alone. And we are bonded.