S08E07 - Muhd Feroz bin Haron & Salmah Bte Johari & Brenda Ng - Staying Through The Hard Parts

S10E04 When Being Yourself Doesn't Feel Safe | Kishan Singh & Hun Ming Kwang

When being yourself doesn't feel safe... ...you become whoever the world needs you to be. Until one day, you forget who you really are. For many LGBTQ+ people, hiding isn't a choice. It's a survival strategy. In Episode 4 of Beyond Pride: The Darkness We Battle, Kishan Singh, science teacher, LGBTQ+ activist, podcast host, and Pink Dot organising committee member, joins Hun Ming Kwang, LGBTQ+ Ally, award winning Master Coach, filmmaker, and InnerWork, Diversity, Inclusion, Deep Democracy & Process Work Facilitator, for one of the most honest conversations of the season. Kishan shares what it was like growing up knowing he was gay, learning to compartmentalise parts of himself to fit into the world around him, and eventually reaching a point where he simply became tired of hiding. The conversation takes a deeply personal turn as he recounts the investigation he faced as a teacher after a complaint about his sexuality, an experience that changed the trajectory of his career, challenged his sense of justice, and ultimately led him towards activism and creating safer spaces for others. Together, Kishan and Ming explore questions that reach far beyond the LGBTQ+ experience: • Why do we hide parts of ourselves? • What happens when authenticity doesn't feel safe? • Why do we become different versions of ourselves to survive? • How do shame and fear quietly shape the choices we make? • What does psychological safety actually look like? • How do we create spaces where people feel safe enough to be fully themselves? Drawing on decades of work in innerWork, trauma-informed coaching, diversity, inclusion, deep democracy and process work, Ming expands the conversation beyond sexuality into something profoundly human: What happens when we spend years believing it's safer to hide than to be seen? Together, they explore how identity, family, education, culture, history and collective systems quietly shape our lives—and why true belonging can only begin when we no longer have to perform a version of ourselves to earn acceptance. This isn't a conversation about sexuality. It's a conversation about what happens to any human being when they learn that authenticity comes with consequences. Because perhaps the greatest freedom isn't coming out to the world. Perhaps it's no longer hiding from yourself. --- Beyond Pride: The Darkness We Battle A season exploring the unseen emotional, psychological and relational realities behind LGBTQ+ lives in Singapore. Rather than debating identities, this season creates space for honest conversations around the inner lives we rarely speak about: belonging, shame, inclusion, acceptance, identities, relationships, family, healing, purpose, faith, community and the universal longing to be accepted for who we are. Whether you're part of the LGBTQ+ community, an ally, or simply wanting to be a more conscious parent to your child, or even simply someone searching for a deeper understanding of yourself and others, this season invites you into conversations that move beyond headlines and into our shared humanity. If this conversation resonates with you, share it with someone who values thoughtful dialogue, and subscribe for more conversations that challenge how we see ourselves, each other, and the world around us. — 🎙️ About the Podcast The Clean Your Toilet Podcast explores the inner work behind personal growth, leadership, and building a meaningful life through honest, unfiltered conversations. #CleanYourToiletPodcast #lgbtq #pridemonth #pride #Safety #Authenticity #Identity #InnerWork #DeepDemocracy #TraumaHealing #MentalHealth #Leadership #humanity #lovewins #podcast #singapore #socialissues

S10E03 The Hardest Part Wasn't Having A Child. It Was Becoming Ready. | Ching & Cally, Ming Kwang

People think the hardest part of becoming queer parents is having a child.It isn't.The hardest part is everything that comes before.The emotional work, the difficult conversations, the uncertainty.The systems that weren't designed for you.And asking yourselves one question over and over again:"Are we truly ready to bring a child into this world?"In Episode 3 of Beyond Pride: The Darkness We Battle, Ching Chia and Cally Chia —lesbian mums, community builders, and advocates for rainbow families join Hun Ming Kwang, LGBTQ+ Ally, award winning Master Coach, filmmaker, and InnerWork, Diversity, Inclusion, Deep Democracy & Process Work Facilitator, for a deeply moving conversation about building a queer family in Singapore.What unfolds is far more than a conversation about parenthood.It's about what happens when love alone isn't enough.We are not taught to be parents, let us be real here. We learnt either what to be or not to be from watching our parents fumbling as we were growing up and that shaped our way of becoming one. The reality is becoming parents requires years of emotional preparation, overseas fertility treatment, navigating healthcare and legal systems, financial sacrifice, and the courage to heal the parts of yourself you don't want your children to inherit.Together, they explore questions that every parent, present and future, can relate to:* What does it really mean to be ready to become a parent?* How do we stop passing intergenerational trauma to our children?* Why is emotional readiness just as important as financial readiness?* What happens when the systems around you weren't designed for your family?* Can chosen family become as powerful as the family we were born into?* What kind of world are we creating for the next generation?* Let us redefine parenthood and what family is, outside of the social constructs.Drawing from decades of work in trauma-informed coaching, innerwork, conflict facilitation, group therapy, family and intergenerational systems, diversity, inclusion and deep democracy, Ming expands the conversation beyond queer parenthood into a universal human challenge:How do we consciously build a future that is healthier than the past we inherited?This isn't simply a conversation about raising a queer family.It's about choosing not to let your past become your children's future, and a sense of how conscious parenting is in order to stop intergenerational patterns from passing down. It is fundamentally breaking out of the molds and the scripts we were handled with greater awareness and clarity, in order to examine a life beyond than what was assigned.Because perhaps the most important question is"Who must we become before we raise another human being?"---Beyond Pride: The Darkness We BattleA season exploring the unseen emotional, psychological and relational realities behind LGBTQ+ lives in Singapore.Rather than debating identities, this season creates space for honest conversations around the inner lives we rarely speak about: belonging, shame, inclusion, acceptance, identities, relationships, family, healing, purpose, faith, community and the universal longing to be accepted for who we are.Whether you're part of the LGBTQ+ community, an ally, or simply wanting to be a more conscious parent to your child, or even simply someone searching for a deeper understanding of yourself and others, this season invites you into conversations that move beyond headlines and into our shared humanity.—🎙️ About the PodcastThe Clean Your Toilet Podcast explores the inner work behind personal growth, leadership, and building a meaningful life through honest, unfiltered conversations.#CleanYourToiletPodcast #lgbtq #Identity #community #Queer #Parenthood #IntergenerationalTrauma #HealingJourney #Podcast #Singapore #InnerWork #DeepDemocracy #ProcessWork #ConsciousParenting #intentionalliving #pride #personalgrowth #familylove   [https://studio.youtube.com/channel/UCXIqe1vk_5Hmqd50ELPY7qQ]

S10E02: Why Do We Spend Our Lives Looking For Belonging? | Jean Seizure & Hun Ming Kwang

Everyone wants to belong. Few realise how much of themselves they've abandoned just to fit in. Church. School. Family. Society. In Episode 2 of Beyond Pride: The Darkness We Battle, queer artist Jean Seizure joins Ming Kwang, an LGBTQ+ Ally, also an award winning Master Coach, Filmmaker, and InnerWork, Diversity, Inclusion, Deep Democracy & Process Work Facilitator for a deeply personal conversation about identity, belonging trauma, faith, family, and the lifelong search for community. Jean opens up about growing up in a conservative Christian environment, discovering her identity, being singled out in school, navigating rejection within church, carrying the pressure of public visibility, and learning to heal through art, therapy, and honest conversations. Together, Jean and Ming move beyond the surface of identity politics to explore the deeper human experiences that shape us all. They explore questions such as: * Why do we spend our lives searching for belonging? * How do childhood experiences continue to shape our relationships as adults? * What happens when faith and identity seem to collide? * Why do we keep repeating the same emotional patterns? * How do family histories silently influence the way we see ourselves? * Can we ever truly belong if we don't first belong to ourselves? Drawing from decades of work in trauma-informed inner work, diversity, inclusion, conflict facilitation and process work, Ming invites us to look beyond labels and into the invisible systems—family, culture, religion and inherited histories that quietly shape our lives. This conversation is about the universal longing to be accepted, understood and loved for who we are. Because perhaps the question isn't: "Where do I belong?" Perhaps it's: "What parts of myself have I abandoned in order to belong?" — Beyond Pride: The Darkness We Battle A season exploring the unseen emotional, psychological and relational realities behind LGBTQ+ lives in Singapore. Rather than debating identities, this season creates space for honest conversations around the inner lives we rarely speak about: belonging, shame, relationships, family, healing, purpose, faith, community and the universal longing to be accepted for who we are. Whether you're part of the LGBTQ+ community, an ally, or simply someone searching for a deeper understanding of yourself and others, this season invites you into conversations that move beyond headlines and into our shared humanity. If this conversation resonates with you, share it with someone who values thoughtful dialogue, and subscribe for more conversations that challenge how we see ourselves, each other, and the world around us. — 🎙️ About the Podcast The Clean Your Toilet Podcast explores the inner work behind personal growth, leadership, and building a meaningful life through honest, unfiltered conversations. #CleanYourToiletPodcast #lgbtq #Identity #community #MentalHealth #faith #traumahealing #InnerWork #DeepDemocracy #healingjourney #selfawareness #PrideMonth #Podcast #Singapore

S10E01: Who Are You Without Your Labels? | Joanne Chen & Hun Ming Kwang

We created labels to help us belong.So why do they so often divide us?On the surface, this is a conversation about growing up lesbian in Singapore.But very quickly, it becomes something much deeper.In the first episode of Beyond Pride: The Darkness We Battle, Joanne Chen — community builder, Centre Manager of Proud Spaces, and proud lesbian joins Hun Ming Kwang — LGBTQ+ ally, Master Coach, and Innerwork, Diversity, Inclusivity, Deep Democracy & Process Work (IDIDDP) Facilitator for a conversation that begins with Pride, but ultimately explores the human search for identity, belonging, freedom and what it truly means to be seen.Growing up in Singapore, Joanne knew she was different long before she had the language to describe it. She shares candidly about navigating religious schools, bullying, rejection, and the quiet loneliness of never seeing yourself reflected in the world around you.Those experiences eventually led her to dedicate her life to building communities and creating spaces where others no longer have to feel alone.Drawing on decades of work in inner transformation, diversity, conflict facilitation and process work, Ming gently expands the conversation beyond identity politics into deeper human questions that affect every one of us.Together, they explore:• Why do we need labels to feel safe?• When does identity become a prison rather than a source of belonging?• How do shame, exclusion and discrimination shape the way we see ourselves?• Why do we instinctively divide the world into "us" and "them"?• Can we honour our identities without becoming confined by them?• What does it actually mean to be free?This conversation weaves through sexuality, religion, community, therapy, mental health, indigenous wisdom, belonging and the psychology of identity.It isn't about arriving at easy answers.It's about asking better questions.Because perhaps the deepest question isn't:"Who do you identify as?"It's:"Who are you... when every label falls away?"---Beyond Pride: The Darkness We BattleA season exploring the unseen emotional, psychological and relational realities behind LGBTQ+ lives in Singapore.Rather than debating identities, this season creates space for honest conversations around the inner lives we rarely speak about: belonging, shame, relationships, family, healing, purpose, faith, community and the universal longing to be accepted for who we are.Whether you're part of the LGBTQ+ community, an ally, or simply someone searching for a deeper understanding of yourself and others, this season invites you into conversations that move beyond headlines and into our shared humanity.If this conversation resonates with you, share it with someone who values thoughtful dialogue, and subscribe for more conversations that challenge how we see ourselves, each other, and the world around us.—🎙 About the PodcastThe Clean Your Toilet Podcast explores the inner work behind personal growth, leadership, and building a meaningful life through honest, unfiltered conversations.#CleanYourToiletPodcast #lgbtq #Identity #community #MentalHealth #InnerWork #DeepDemocracy #Psychology #PrideMonth #Podcast #Singapore

S09E07: What Our Kinks Reveal About Us | Goddess Dahlia & Angjolie Mei | CYT S9

What if the people we judge the most are the ones who understand consent, boundaries, and human behaviour the best?When most people hear the word "kink", they think of pain, sex, dominance, submission, and taboo desires.But beneath all of that lies something far more interesting:Trust.Trauma.Healing.And the universal human need to be seen, accepted, and understood.In this episode, funeral director Angjolie Mei sits down with professional dominatrix Goddess Dahlia for one of the most unexpected conversations we've ever had on the podcast.What begins as an exploration into the world of kink quickly becomes a deeper conversation about power dynamics, consent, self-discovery, therapy, trauma, and what it means to live authentically in a world that is quick to judge what it doesn't understand.Together, they explore:• Why some people are drawn to dominance and submission• What kink can teach us about consent and boundaries• The psychology behind power and vulnerability• Why many people struggle to say "no"• Trauma, healing, and self-discovery• Living with judgment and stigma• The courage to embrace who you truly areOne of the most surprising insights from this conversation?The kink community often has more explicit conversations about consent, boundaries, and personal agency than many people have in their everyday relationships.At its heart, this episode isn't about kink.It's about being human:The parts of ourselves we hide.The stories we carry.The wounds we heal.And the freedom that comes from no longer needing permission to be yourself.If you've ever felt misunderstood, judged, different, or curious about what drives human behaviour, this conversation is for you.#CleanYourToiletPodcast #Psychology #Consent #SelfDiscovery #PersonalGrowth #HumanBehaviour #TraumaHealing #Authenticity #InnerWork #PowerDynamics #Podcast #Singapore