Sacred Illness™

Ep. 55: Learning to Receive: On Caretaking, Kidney Transplants, and Unbecoming with Shelby Hanson

In this profound episode, Shelby Hanson—a speech-language pathologist, kidney transplant recipient, and nervous system coach—shares her harrowing and transformative journey through sudden kidney failure, a high-risk pregnancy while on the transplant list, and a transplanted kidney that took 49 mysterious days to “wake up.” After being asked by her nephrologist, “What’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you getting better?” Shelby realized the healing she sought wasn’t going to come from the outside—it was in her own nervous system. We explore how a lifetime of people-pleasing, perfectionism, and hyper-independence kept her body in chronic fight-or-flight, and how learning to regulate her stress response, visualize healing, and truly receive care allowed her body to finally accept the gift of a new kidney. This is a story that bridges critical Western medicine with the essential, unseen work of somatic healing. It’s about how illness can become the ultimate teacher in boundary-setting, self-trust, and reclaiming your energy—and how sometimes, the body needs safety more than it needs another treatment. 🌿 What You’ll Discover ✨ How Shelby went from 100% to less than 20% kidney function in 18 months—with no clear explanation. ✨ The shocking moment she discovered she was pregnant while on the kidney transplant list, and how her baby’s kidneys began filtering toxins from her blood. ✨ Why her new kidney failed to function for 7 weeks post-transplant, and the pivotal moment that shifted everything. ✨ How chronic people-pleasing and a “caretaker” identity wired her nervous system for stress, leaving no energy for healing. ✨ The “accidental” discovery of nervous system regulation through an anti-inflammatory diet, and how it prepared her body to conceive. ✨ Why visualizing her healed self and connecting to her future self were critical in activating her transplanted kidney. ✨ How a decades-old hip pain vanished when she realized it was her nervous system’s way of protecting her from emotional pain. ✨ The profound practice of learning to receive—from a kidney to everyday help—and why giving from a place of abundance requires it. ✨ Why Shelby feels healthier in her 40s, post-transplant, than she did in her 30s, and how she now lives in a place of deep reciprocation and trust with her body. ⏳ Timestamps 00:00 - Shelby’s Opening: “What’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you getting better?” 01:25 - Dr. Erin’s Introduction & The Sacred Illness® Question 02:17 - Welcoming Shelby Hanson: Speech Pathologist & Student of the Nervous System 03:20 - The Story Begins: Military Life, Moving Across the World, and Early Symptoms 05:00 - The Life Insurance Denial That Revealed Kidney Failure 06:00 - Diagnosis, Transplant Listing, and the “Impossible” Pregnancy 07:30 - How Her Baby’s Kidneys Filtered Her Blood 08:00 - The Transplant Call & A “99% Sensitized” Body 09:00 - Post-Transplant Crisis: A Kidney That Wouldn’t Work 10:15 - The Doctor’s Question That Changed Everything 11:00 - The Realization: “My Body Had Never Failed Me” 12:00 - People-Pleasing, Anesthesia, and the Caretaker Identity 13:00 - Discovering Nervous System Regulation & Joe Dispenza 14:25 - Visualization, Prayer, and the 49-Day Turnaround 18:00 - Shifting From Disease-Promoting to Healing States 20:00 - Unlearning Emotional States & Connecting to Your Future Self 24:00 - The Chronic Pain That Was a Nervous System Memory 27:00 - Epigenetics, “Soft Diagnoses,” and Reversing Conditions 30:00 - Learning to Receive: The Kidney as the Ultimate Gift 32:00 - Life 7 Years Post-Transplant: Purpose, Movement, and Listening 35:00 - “Your Body is Never Wrong”—Reallocating Energy, Not Losing It 38:00 - Functional Freeze and Why Exhaustion Isn’t a Lack of Energy 40:00 - Shelby’s Work: Helping Women Reclaim Their Energy 43:00 - Free Gift & How to Connect With Shelby 45:00 - The Aligned Self: Who Did Her Illness Invite Her to Become? 47:00 - Closing: “Our Bodies Can Heal.” 💫 Guest Information & Links Connect with Shelby Hanson: * Instagram: @shelbylivingvibrantly [https://www.instagram.com/shelby.living.vibrantly] * Facebook: Shelby Creates a Beautiful Life [https://www.facebook.com/Shelbycreates.a.beautiful.life] * Website & Coaching: Get Your Energy Back Coaching [https://www.getyourenergybackcoaching.com/] * Podcast Episode: Thriving with Kidney Disease – Apple Podcasts Link [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/20-thriving-with-kidney-disease/id1528449244?i=1000552466969] 🎁 Free Gift for Listeners:“Get Your Energy Back Guide” – Shelby’s Top 3 Tips [https://www.getyourenergybackcoaching.com/get-your-energy-back-guide] 💫 Ready to Go Deeper? → Begin your Sacred Illness® Journey: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community] Save 20% off your first month with code PODCAST → Apply to be a podcast guest:https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest] → Apply to be an Affiliate and help share this work:https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate] → Follow Dr. Erin on Substack: https://drerinhayford.substack.com [https://drerinhayford.substack.com] 🎶 Music by: “Instructions for Living a Life” by Savfkhttps://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic [https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic] This episode is a testament that healing is never just physical. It’s a nervous system conversation, a spiritual reckoning, and a homecoming to the self. Thank you for listening and for your ongoing support of this work! This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe [https://sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

Ep. 54: From Cancer Diagnosis to Sacred Awakening — How Vivian Quintana Found Healing Beyond the Body

When Vivian Quintana was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2017, she faced the terrifying whirlwind of biopsies, mastectomy, chemotherapy, and radiation—but it was in the enforced stillness of “chemo brain” that her real healing began. In this raw and radiant conversation, Vivian shares how her illness became a sacred pause, forcing her to confront a lifetime of stored trauma, hypervigilance, and C-PTSD. Through inner child work, meditation, and a profound shift in perspective, she didn’t just survive—she transformed. Vivian’s story is a powerful testament to the idea that healing isn’t about curing the body alone, but about coming home to the self. Episode Overview In this episode, I sit down with Vivian Quintana, a breast cancer thriver who journeyed from a stage 2B–3 diagnosis through a double mastectomy, chemotherapy, and radiation into a life of deep presence and peace. Vivian reveals how the medical system had no explanation for her cancer—no genetic markers, no clear cause—which led her to uncover the emotional and energetic roots of her disease: childhood trauma, immigration stress, single motherhood, and relational patterns that kept her body in a state of hypervigilance. We explore how the pandemic, arriving just as she finished treatment, gave her the pause she needed to alchemize her pain into purpose. Vivian’s journey illustrates that true healing begins when we stop asking “Why me?” and start asking “What is this here to teach me?” 🌿 What You’ll Discover ✨ How a simple bump on the breast led to a life-altering diagnosis—and why Vivian chose a double mastectomy from the start.✨ The moment her doctors said, “We don’t know what caused this”—and how that became her invitation to look deeper.✨ The link between C-PTSD (complex post-traumatic stress disorder) and chronic illness—and how trauma lives in the body.✨ How “chemo brain” became an unexpected spiritual gateway, forcing Vivian into silence, presence, and energy awareness.✨ Why the pandemic felt like a synchronistic gift—a global pause that mirrored her personal reckoning.✨ The mindset shift from “victim” to “sovereign being”—and how Vivian visualized chemotherapy as a cleanse of stored emotional toxicity.✨ Practical tools for healing beyond medicine: meditation, inner child work, acupuncture, and somatic awareness.✨ How Vivian now lives without hypervigilance or fear—and what it means to see illness as a “blessing in the mess.”✨ Her heartfelt message to those with cancer: “You are the medicine. Advocate for yourself. Your mindset is your most powerful tool.” ⏳ Timestamps 00:51 – Welcoming Vivian Quintana02:00 – The Diagnosis: From a Bump to a Cancer Journey04:00 – Choosing a Double Mastectomy & Navigating Lymph Node Results05:00 – Chemotherapy, Radiation, and the “Red Devil”06:00 – The Spiritual Awakening: Inner Child Work & Meditation08:00 – The Role of C-PTSD & Trauma in Illness10:00 – How Chemo Brain Forced a “Stop” and Opened Spiritual Awareness12:00 – The Pandemic Pause: Synchronicity and Deeper Healing15:00 – Releasing Hypervigilance & Living Without Fear18:00 – Visualization as Medicine: Working WITH Treatment22:00 – The Hospital as a Penthouse: Shifting Perspective25:00 – Message to Those with Cancer: Advocacy & Mindset28:00 – Who Has Your Illness Invited You to Become?30:00 – Closing Gratitude & Invitation 💫 Guest Information & Links Connect with Vivian Quintana:Vivian is a breast cancer thriver, speaker, and testament to the power of trauma-informed healing. She shares her story to inspire others to find meaning and medicine within their own journeys. 💫 Want to Go Deeper? → Begin your Sacred Illness® Journey: Join the community https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community] Use coupon code PODCAST for 20% off your fist month! → Apply to be a podcast guest:https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest] → Apply to be an Affiliate and help share this work:https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate] → Follow Dr. Erin on Substack: 🎶 Music by: “Instructions for Living a Life” by Savfkhttps://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic [https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe [https://sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

Ep. 53: From RA to Remission: A Journey Back to the Heart with Teresa Smith

What if the fiercest, most healing thing you could do is to stop fighting? When Teresa Smith was told her rheumatoid arthritis was incurable, degenerative, and would require aggressive medication, a deep inner voice said no. This refusal launched her not into a harder battle, but into a profound surrender—from a life of high-achieving “yang” striving into the soft, receptive, and heart-led practice she calls Qi Flow. In this episode, we explore how releasing anger, fear, and the need for perfect control didn’t just manage her symptoms but led to a full remission, revealing that true healing begins not with a protocol, but with a homecoming to the self. Episode Overview In this conversation, I sit down with Teresa Smith, a former yoga instructor from the UK who experienced a spontaneous remission from rheumatoid arthritis and psoriasis after consciously rejecting a conventional pharmaceutical path. Teresa recounts her journey from being “yoga girl”—living a fast, achievement-oriented life—to being forced into stillness by debilitating pain. We trace her shift from fear-based searching and restrictive dieting into the creation of her own somatic practice. Together, we examine how healing required moving from a mindset of doing to a state of being, and how connecting to the “smile in the heart” can change the body’s chemical environment from one of stress to one of safety, enabling profound cellular repair. 🌿 What You’ll Discover ✨ The pivotal diagnosis moment and the inner voice that guided Teresa to reject a frightening prognosis. ✨ Why fear-based protocols and strict diets ultimately failed to address the root of her illness. ✨ The essential transition from masculine “yang” energy (striving, perfection) to feminine “yin” energy (softness, flow, receiving). ✨ How Teresa developed “Qi Flow,” a practice blending gentle movement with heart awareness for somatic release. ✨ The science behind emotions and healing: how chronic stress (cortisol) damages cells, while safety and love promote repair. ✨ Forgiveness as a somatic release, not just an intellectual concept. ✨ The core healing realization: shifting identity from “I am sick” to “I am love.” ✨ How illness serves as an ultimate invitation to unlearn, soften, and come home to yourself. ⏳ Timestamps 01:30 - Welcoming Teresa Smith 05:00 - The Diagnosis: Facing a “Degenerative” Prognosis 10:00 - The Inner ‘No’: Rejecting the Conventional Path 15:00 - The Pitfall of Fear-Based Protocols & Dieting 20:00 - The Shift from ‘Yang’ Striving to ‘Yin’ Receiving 25:00 - Creating ‘Qi Flow’: Movement from the Heart 30:00 - The Science of Safety: Cortisol vs. Coherence 35:00 - Forgiveness as Somatic Release 40:00 - The Identity Shift: “I Am Love” 45:00 - Illness as an Invitation to Come Home 50:00 - Teresa’s Offerings and Final Reflections 💫 Guest Information & Links Connect with Teresa Smith: - Website: http://www.soulwavestudio.com [http://www.soulwavestudio.com] - Instagram: @qi.flow.girl [https://www.instagram.com/qi.flow.girl] - Offerings: Online Qi Flow training and resources for people to slow down and reconnect. 💫 Ready to Go Deeper? → Begin your Sacred Illness® Journey: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community] Use coupon code PODCAST at checkout for 20% off your first month! → Apply to be a podcast guest: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest] → Apply to be an Affiliate and help share this work: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate] → Follow Dr. Erin on Substack: 🎶 Music by: “Instructions for Living a Life” by Savfk https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic [https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe [https://sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

Ep. 52: Releasing the Womb: Hysterectomy as the Holistic Path to Healing with Oriana Broderick

In a world that often pits holistic healing against conventional medicine, the bravest choice is often the one that honors the sacred message of your illness, even when it leads to surgery. This is a story of how a hysterectomy became the ultimate somatic release of a lifetime of swallowed emotions, inherited burdens, and the profound responsibility of being the “strong one.” Far from a failure, it is a testament that true healing is not about the protocol you follow, but the unwavering step you take toward your own truth, and surrendering to what unfolds from there. Episode Overview In this powerful and deeply personal episode, I welcome back Oriana Broderick—writer, artist, and former co-host of the Sacred Illness® Podcast—to share the culmination of her multi-year healing journey. Oriana unfolds her path from a childhood of emotional caretaking and trauma to a life of van-life freedom, which paradoxically unleashed a torrent of debilitating physical symptoms. We trace her search through countless supplements and holistic practices to the pivotal moment of confronting numerous uterine fibroids. This conversation bravely navigates the tension between holistic ideals and medical necessity, exploring how Oriana’s decision to have a hysterectomy became a sacred, somatic ritual to release not only her own stored grief and anger but the painful stories of the women in her lineage. We examine the radical self-trust required to make such a choice and how illness ultimately asks one question: did you take the next step toward knowing yourself? 🌿 What You’ll Discover ✨ How leaving a high-stress life for van life created the space for suppressed physical symptoms to finally surface. ✨ The turning point from seeking external solutions in a “huge box of supplements” to seeking internal truth and somatic understanding. ✨ Why the pressure to heal “naturally” can be as fear-based as the conventional medical system, and how to find your own sovereign path. ✨ The profound realization that her fibroids were “bubbles of emotion” holding the anger, grief, and sadness of a lifetime—and a lineage—of silence. ✨ How the universe tested her resolve by canceling her surgery, and why rescheduling it became the ultimate act of self-trust. ✨ Why a hysterectomy can be a holistic, healing choice when approached as a conscious release and a reclaiming of personal space. ✨ The essential reframe: “You can’t fail yourself… The whole point of this journey isn’t what you did or didn’t do… It’s about did I make that next step towards myself?” ✨ Oriana’s message to her younger self—and to anyone in the depths of hopelessness: “It might get harder before it gets easier, but it gets easier, and it is so worth the journey.” ⏳ Timestamps 02:00 - Welcoming Back Oriana Broderick 03:00 - The Foundation: Childhood Trauma and the Role of the “Pillar” 06:00 - Van Life & The Unraveling: When Freedom Triggered a Physical Collapse 10:00 - The Search for Answers: Doctors, Dismissal, and a Box of 50 Supplements 15:00 - Finding Somatic Work and Learning to Trust Support 20:00 - The Fibroid Diagnosis: Navigating Medical Options and External Opinions 25:00 - The Pivotal Realization: Carrying a Lineage of Women’s Pain 30:00 - The Surgery Cancelation as the Final Test of Self-Trust 35:00 - The Hysterectomy as a Somatic Release & Experiencing Divine Support 40:00 - Post-Op: The Journey Continues—Rebuilding Iron, Learning to Rest 45:00 - The Core Philosophy: Your Body is Never Wrong, No Choice is a Failure 50:00 - Would You Have Healed Had You Not Gotten Sick? Oriana’s Honest Answer 55:00 - Ecstatic Dancing, Writing, and Becoming “A Woman Who Speaks Her Truth” 01:00:00 - The True Purpose of Life & Illness: To Know Yourself Deeply 01:05:00 - Oriana’s Message to Anyone Feeling Hopeless 01:10:00 - Who Has Her Illness Invited Her to Become? 💫 Guest Information & Links Connect with Oriana Broderick: - Instagram (Personal & Writing): @whispersandrevelations - Instagram (Art & Jewelry): @rootandwing2025 - Book: When The Soul Howls (Coming Soon!) 💫 Want to Go Deeper? → Begin your Sacred Illness® Journey: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community] Use coupon code PODCAST for 20% off your first month! → Apply to be a podcast guest: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest] → Apply to be an Affiliate and help share this work: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate] → Follow Dr. Erin on Substack: 🎶 Music by: “Instructions for Living a Life” by Savfk https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic [https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe [https://sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

Ep. 51: The Womb as a Wound and a Sanctuary — Healing Uterine Fibroids by Re-mothering the Self with Claire Hickson

What if a diagnosis was not a sentence to be carried out, but an invitation to come home to the most fractured parts of yourself? When Claire Hickson was advised to have a hysterectomy for a large uterine fibroid, she heard a different call—one that led her not into an operating room, but into the deepest chambers of her own story. In this deeply moving episode, we explore how a physical symptom in the womb can be the body’s sacred attempt to house a lost inner child, and how the journey to heal is ultimately a journey to reclaim, love, and rebirth the self. Claire Hickson is a yoga teacher, poet, and guide from the UK, who shares her multi-layered journey with a 10cm uterine fibroid. We traverse her path from medical diagnosis and the conventional push for a hysterectomy to the intuitive breadcrumbs that led her to holistic treatments, a profound creative awakening through poetry, and the pivotal body psychotherapy session that revealed the fibroid as a manifestation of a newborn trauma. Together, we examine the deep connection between the throat and the womb, how illness can awaken a medicinal voice, and what it means to become a “safe sanctuary” for yourself and others. 🌿 What You’ll Discover ✨ Why Claire chose to explore the message of her fibroid instead of opting for an immediate hysterectomy. ✨ The pivotal role of community and guided meditation in creating a safe container for deep inner work and creative expression. ✨ How a poetic awakening became the key to unlocking a suppressed voice and healing the throat-womb connection. ✨ The moment in a body psychotherapy training that connected her physical symptoms to a pre-verbal trauma of abandonment. ✨ Why Claire now sees her fibroid as symbolizing being “pregnant with myself” and the profound shift to re-mothering her inner child. ✨ How the journey of healing is non-linear and requires trusting intuitive breadcrumbs, even when they don’t make logical sense. ✨ The transformative power of using your voice—through speech, poetry, and now singing—as a core part of somatic healing. ⏳ Timestamps 01:00 - Welcoming Claire Hickson 02:40 - Claire’s Story: The Uterine Fibroid Diagnosis 06:30 - The Conventional Path: Pressure for a Hysterectomy 10:00 - The Pandemic Pause: Space for Meditation and Inner Seeking 13:00 - The Creative Awakening: An Outpouring of Soulful Poetry 16:00 - Following Intuition into Yoga Teacher Training 19:00 - Choosing HIFU Treatment and Reclaiming Personal Authority 25:00 - The Pivotal Realization: Connecting Fibroids to Newborn Trauma 30:00 - The Practice of Re-mothering and Holding a Young Self 35:00 - The Throat-Womb Connection: Voice as Medicine 45:00 - Claire’s Oracle Poem: “Hey You” 50:00 - The Next Layer: Singing as Somatic Healing 55:00 - Who Has Her Illness Invited Her to Become? 💫 Guest Information & Links Connect with Claire Hickson: - Instagram: @claire_inlight [https://www.instagram.com/claire_inlight/] - Website: https://instabook.io/landing/yogawithclaire [https://instabook.io/landing/yogawithclaire] - Book: In Light [https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1914447913?ref=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apan_dp_T0CYE3D19BDKA7N3Z5A7&ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apan_dp_T0CYE3D19BDKA7N3Z5A7&social_share=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apan_dp_T0CYE3D19BDKA7N3Z5A7&bestFormat=true] - Available on Amazon [https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1914447913?ref=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apan_dp_T0CYE3D19BDKA7N3Z5A7&ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apan_dp_T0CYE3D19BDKA7N3Z5A7&social_share=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apan_dp_T0CYE3D19BDKA7N3Z5A7&bestFormat=true] - YouTube: www.youtube.com/@claire_hickson [http://www.youtube.com/@claire_hickson] 💫 Want to Go Deeper? → Begin your Sacred Illness® Journey: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/community] Use coupon code PODCAST for 20% off → Apply to be a podcast guest: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/podcast-guest] → Apply to be an Affiliate and help share this work: https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate [https://www.aurorasomatic.com/affiliate] → Follow Dr. Erin on Substack: https://sacredillness.substack.com [https://sacredillness.substack.com] 🎶 Music by: “Instructions for Living a Life” by Savfk https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic [https://www.youtube.com/@SavfkMusic] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe [https://sacredillness.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]