Is it my trauma or their issue?

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This week's question was: When I'm in conflict, whether with my husband or even close friends, I struggle to tell what's mine to work on and what's theirs. I have a lot of unresolved trauma around betrayal and hurt from my parents. So I can't always tell if I'm being triggered and reacting from old wounds or if the other person is genuinely in the wrong and not showing up for me. How do I know when it's me that needs to heal something and when it's them who needs to do better? Listen to the answer here! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit yourinnervoice.substack.com [https://yourinnervoice.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Do You Use Healing As A Form of Self-Punishment?

We enter healing spaces to feel lighter, freer, and more whole—but what happens when healing starts to feel like an endless checklist? In this episode, we explore the fine line between self-discovery and self-punishment, the shame and fear often driving our “healing”, the pressure to constantly be “working on ourselves,” and why true healing isn’t about fixing every part of us—it’s about trusting where we are. If you’ve ever felt exhausted by the chase for a “better” version of yourself, this conversation is for you. If this is your approach on healing and you are looking to break free from this rigid mindset, join me for Messy—a live Substack workshop happening March 2nd at 2 PM (for paid subscribers). We’re tossing perfectionism out the window and diving into somatic healing in a way that’s fun, a bit chaotic and childlike, and veryyyy freeing. Expect light movement (although everything is an option within this space), play, curiosity, and some beautiful chaos—because real healing isn’t neat, and it definitely isn’t about getting it “right.” I’ll be sending out all the tools and options you might want to gather for the event this Friday. Can’t wait to see you there! The Inner Voice is a publication for practical healing and untold potential. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free subscriber. To support this dream of mine more financially and get access to the entire Golden Echoes portal, become a paid subscriber today. ❤️ If you have any questions you would like to me to answer via the audio downloads, please comment!! I would loveeee to answer it via these transmissions. With love and ease, Cole A.E. Rom This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit yourinnervoice.substack.com [https://yourinnervoice.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

23. feb. 202525 min

Is it my trauma or their issue?

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