What Needs to Die for You to Live Again?

The Enneagram Guide to Surviving (and Understanding) Your Family This Summer

You've done the work. The therapy, the journaling, the coaching, maybe you've had a few real breakthroughs. And then summer rolls around. And so does the inevitable trip home to see your family, friends, and people from your past. And it feels like all of your hard work just goes right out the window. Why does this always happen??!? In this episode of Beyond the Type, Sandy answers that question, explores why outdated versions of ourselves seem to show up uninvited, and how our Enneagram type (and the types of the people we grew up with) shape that whole experience of "going home". In this episode: * Why your nervous system doesn't read a calendar (and why that matters when you walk into your childhood home) * How Enneagram Types 4, 5, and 9 relate differently to the past, and what that means for nostalgia * What it's like growing up with (or being) a Type 1, Type 2, or Type 6 * How big, future-facing energy (Types 3, 7, 8) shows up in family dynamics * Three exercises to bring a little more awareness to your next visit home, and why naming things (your fears, your hopes, what "role" you playing when you were younger) is important Sandy also stresses the importance of compassion - both for your family and for yourself - and why it's important to remember to pack some compassion in your suitcase when you're getting ready for that trip home. ___ Beyond the Type Episode on True Self/False Self: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149215312 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149215312] ___ Stay in touch! Sign up for my newsletter here and receive my 9 Ways to Communicate Better guide: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication] ___ Enneagram, Enneagram types, Enneagram and family, family of origin, going home for the holidays, family triggers, family patterns, childhood patterns, personal growth, self-awareness, emotional intelligence, family dynamics, Enneagram type 1, Enneagram type 2, Enneagram type 6, Enneagram type 4, Enneagram type 5, Enneagram type 9, Enneagram type 3, Enneagram type 7, Enneagram type 8, holistic life coach, leadership coach, inner critic, people pleasing, family relationships, summer vacation, family gatherings, why do I regress around my family, nervous system regulation, self-compassion, communication skills, Beyond the Type podcast, Sandy Swanson

June Check-In: Forget the Goals. How Are You, Really?

If you've ever felt exhausted despite doing all the "right" things, stuck between who you were in January and who you are now, or quietly haunted by a feeling you keep pushing aside — this episode is for you. In this episode of Beyond the Type, holistic life and leadership coach Sandy Swanson invites you to do something radical: stop measuring your progress and start checking in with yourself. And June is an excellent time to do just that. Sandy offers three powerful self-reflection questions to help you assess where your energy has actually been going, where you've felt most like yourself (and where you haven't), and what's been quietly asking for your attention that you keep putting off. In this episode: * Why midyear is the most underrated moment for honest self-reflection * The difference between healthy adaptation and chronic self-abandonment * How "longing" is information — not indulgence Consider this your permission slip to pull over, take stock, and stop dragging around goals that no longer fit — so you can travel a little lighter into the second half of the year. ___ Beyond the Type Episode on True Self/False Self: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149215312 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149215312] ___ Stay in touch! Sign up for my newsletter here and receive my 9 Ways to Communicate Better guide: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication] ___ June check-in, midyear check-in, self-reflection, personal growth, Enneagram, life coaching, women in transition, emotional wellness, nervous system, identity, life and leadership coach, Beyond the Type podcast, Sandy Swanson, holistic coaching, Type 2 Enneagram, Type 9 Enneagram, burnout, self-awareness, setting intentions, goal setting, midlife, career transition

Why "Just Be Yourself" Is Terrible Advice: The Enneagram, Authenticity, and Finding Yourself

Have you ever been told to "just be yourself" and wondered what that even means? In this episode, Sandy explores the difference between the True Self and the False Self through the lens of the Enneagram. We look at how personality patterns develop, why authenticity can feel so difficult, and how each of the nine Enneagram types can lose touch with their deeper essence. Because before we can *be* ourselves, we have to know who that self actually is. In this episode: • What the True Self and False Self really mean • Why "just be yourself" isn't always helpful advice • How the Enneagram reveals the difference between personality and essence • The unique "static" and "signal" of all 9 Enneagram types • What authenticity actually feels like • How presence helps us reconnect with who we really are • Why personal growth is more about uncovering than fixing This episode draws on teachings from Richard Rohr, Mory Fontanez, and the Enneagram tradition. If you've ever felt disconnected from yourself, this episode offers a different way of understanding who you really are. ___ Learn more about Enneagram Typing Interviews here: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/typinginterview [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/typinginterview] Podcast Ep #1 - Start Here: Coaching, the Enneagram, and Your Shade of Blue: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149050344 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149050344] Podcast Ep - Stances:  Why You Withdraw, Talk Too Much,  or Bulldoze People https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149067197 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149067197] Richard Rohr - Immortal Diamond (book): https://amzn.to/4dSQv1S [https://amzn.to/4dSQv1S] Mory Fontanez - Higher Self: Reclaiming the Power of Your Intuition (book): https://amzn.to/4uornoy [https://amzn.to/4uornoy] ___ Beyond the Type episode on True Self/False Self: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149215312 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149215312] ___ Stay in touch! Sign up for my newsletter here and receive my 9 Ways to Communicate Better guide: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication] ___ 🔹Hi! I'm Sandy, Professional Certified Coach (ICF-PCC), National Board Certified Health & Wellness Coach (NBC-HWC), and self-proclaimed Enneagram nerd.🤓 🔹I’m a holistic life and leadership coach (some clients call me a "people whisperer"), and I'm dedicated to helping you understand yourself and others more deeply so you can live with confidence, clarity, and compassion. 🔹I’m also a mentor coach and love helping brand-new coaches with their coaching skills. 🔹 My coaching philosophy:  You don't need to be fixed, you need to be found.  🏳️‍🌈 Proud to support LGBTQ+ and BIPOC communities 🏳️‍🌈 ___ Enneagram, true self, false self, authenticity, self-discovery, self-awareness, personal growth, identity, intuition, Richard Rohr, Mory Fontanez, Enneagram types, personality patterns, ego, essence, higher self, finding yourself, emotional growth, spiritual growth, coaching, mindfulness, presence, authentic living.

Burned Out or Stuck in Survival Mode? Why You’re So Reactive or Exhausted

Feeling exhausted, reactive, emotionally flat, or constantly on edge? It may not be burnout. In this episode, Sandy explores the difference between burnout and nervous system overwhelm - and why so many people feel exhausted, reactive, anxious, emotionally flat, or “on edge” even when nothing catastrophic is happening. We'll cover: • The difference between burnout and nervous system dysregulation • Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn explained simply • How overwhelm shows up in each Enneagram type • Why productivity strategies don’t work when the body feels unsafe • 3 tools to help you navigate overwhelm and stress If you’ve been feeling emotionally exhausted, unusually reactive, disconnected, anxious, or unable to truly rest, this episode may help you better understand what your nervous system is really trying to communicate. Share this episode with someone you love who may be experiencing burnout. <3  ___ Stay in touch! Sign up for my newsletter here and receive my 9 Ways to Communicate Better guide: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication] Learn more about my group coaching program, Communicate with Confidence through the Lens of the Enneagram: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/bettercommunication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/bettercommunication] Episode on safety: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149114211 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149114211] Yoga nidra meditation: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149101492 [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/podcasts/beyond-the-type-an-enneagram-inspired-podcast-about-being-human/episodes/2149101492]   ___ burnout, nervous system regulation, chronic stress, anxiety, emotional exhaustion, overwhelm, Enneagram, fight or flight, people pleasing, stress response, nervous system dysregulation, emotional regulation, yoga nidra, workplace stress

Why Do I Feel Lonely When I Have Friends?

Have you ever been surrounded by people and still felt completely, inexplicably lonely? That hollow, flat feeling has a name: relational hunger. And it's more common than you think. In this episode, Sandy explores the difference between being heard and being truly known, why so many of us are starving for real connection even when our calendars are full, and what's quietly getting in the way. You'll learn about the three Enneagram instincts (self-preservation, social, and sexual/one-to-one) and how each one shapes what you hunger for in relationships, as well as where your blind spots might be hiding. Sandy also shares why knowing your dominant instinct can help you stop showing up to the wrong table and wondering why you're still hungry. Plus: five practical, doable things you can try this week to start feeding that relational hunger -  especially if you're in your 30s, 40s, or 50s and the structures that used to create connection have mostly fallen away. In this episode: * Why loneliness is not new, and what HAS changed * What "relational hunger" is and how it disguises itself * The three Enneagram instincts and how each one experiences loneliness differently * A special look at Type 5 and why connection can be a real blind spot * Five practical ways to build connection as an adult This one is for anyone who has ever driven home from a great party feeling more alone than when they arrived.  Share with someone who also might be feeling that "hunger"! ___ Learn more about Enneagram Typing Interviews here: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/typinginterview [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/typinginterview] West Health-Gallup survey on mental health: https://news.gallup.com/poll/700079/mental-health-ratings-continue-worsen.aspx [https://news.gallup.com/poll/700079/mental-health-ratings-continue-worsen.aspx] ___ Stay in touch! Sign up for my newsletter here and receive my 9 Ways to Communicate Better guide: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/communication] Learn more about my group coaching program, Communicate with Confidence through the Lens of the Enneagram: https://www.swansoncoaching.com/bettercommunication [https://www.swansoncoaching.com/bettercommunication] ___ loneliness, feeling lonely with friends, feeling disconnected, how to make friends as an adult, how to meet people, sense of belonging, belonging vs fitting in, real connection, emotional connection, surface connection, Enneagram instincts, Enneagram subtypes, self-preservation instinct, social instinct, sexual instinct, one-to-one instinct, Enneagram Type 5, loneliness epidemic, mental health, personal growth, self-awareness, adult friendship, how to feel less lonely, holistic coaching, life coaching, Enneagram coaching, and Beyond the Type podcast.