What Took You So Long

What Took You So Long

What Took You So Long? A short essay about waiting, urgency, and the moment everything becomes clear. From my memoir-in-progress, Cape Not Included—stories about caregiving, identity, and the hidden cost of always being the one who shows up. Read the full essay on Substack: https://capenotincluded.substack.com/p/what-took-you-so-long [https://capenotincluded.substack.com/p/what-took-you-so-long] Subscribe for more essays from Cape Not Included: https://capenotincluded.substack.com [https://capenotincluded.substack.com] Get full access to Cape Not Included at capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe [https://capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Trainable: Once a Caregiver, Always a Caregiver

A short audio essay from my memoir-in-progress: Cape Not Included. Get full access to Cape Not Included at capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe [https://capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Adventures in Dementia Care

Get full access to Cape Not Included at capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe [https://capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Still Not Napping

Cape Not Included is now also available on Apple, Spotify, and YouTube. If you’d rather listen to Still Not Napping, you can now. I just got a cancer diagnosis and still cannot nap. This is not a brag. After four years of caregiving—staying alert, staying useful, staying whatever my dad needed—my nervous system apparently missed the memo that the emergency is over. It’s still out there, scanning the horizon, certain something needs handling. Caregiver burnout doesn’t clock out just because the caregiving does. A lung tumor is not a convincing enough argument for rest. I’ve tried. This piece is about hypervigilance—the long hangover of caregiving—and the specific indignity of knowing your nervous system needs to heal while your nervous system absolutely refuses to cooperate. If you’ve ever been so wired for emergency that slowing down actually feels dangerous, you’ll recognize this. Get full access to Cape Not Included at capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe [https://capenotincluded.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]