Finding Home Again: Amanda’s Story of Queer Faith

Finding Home Again: Amanda’s Story of Queer Faith

Tyler sits down with Amanda Macchiarola (she/her), a mental health counseling student and beloved member of Christ Church NYC, to trace her long journey from a “good Methodist kid” to a queer adult who thought she had to choose between faith and her own identity. Amanda shares how growing up in a church where queerness was never named—neither condemned nor celebrated—left her feeling invisible, forced into an either/or: Christian or queer. So she walked away from church altogether… until a small campus ministry with a pride flag and a “queer utopia” of Wednesdays in the woods and worship over shared meals began to stitch those parts of her life back together. Through her story, Amanda and Tyler explore queerness as expansiveness, spirituality as the sacredness of everything, and the way wonder, nuance, and community can heal old wounds. Amanda reflects on how her own journey is shaping her vocation as a therapist for queer folks, why the simple phrase “Jesus wept” anchors her in seasons of suffering, and how utopian, temporary little pockets of queer Christian community can change a life. This episode is for anyone who’s ever thought, “It has to be one or the other,” and is starting to suspect that God might be found precisely in the both/and—and more. Chapters (00:00:00) 00:00:00 — Welcome to Illuminate & this season’s focus 00:00:35 — Meet Amanda: moving to NYC & finding Christ Church 02:18 — Growing up Methodist, discovering queerness, and feeling forced to choose 05:21 — Seeing a pride flag at a UMC church & finding a “queer utopia” campus ministry 11:25 — Training as a therapist: queerness, wonder, and holding space for others 24:20 — Defining queerness: expansiveness, nuance, and life beyond the box 26:45 — Defining spirituality: the sacredness of everything 31:38 — What queerness teaches about God: “Jesus wept” and a God who suffers with us 36:22 — Final blessing: seek wonder, seek abundance, seek queerness This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit illuminatepodcast.substack.com [https://illuminatepodcast.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Pressing Onward with Wesley King: Big Freedia, Queer Choir & Ever-Expanding Faith

Minister Tyler Heston sits down with Nashville pastor, conductor, and arts leader Wesley King (Vine Street Christian Church; Artistic Director of Nashville in Harmony) for a story that shatters boxes: how an LGBTQ+ chorus ended up backing Big Freedia on a gospel project—and why it became a deeply spiritual experience for believers and non-believers alike. From grief and “Let It Rain” to electric-slide rehearsals, fluid identity, and theology that keeps widening, this conversation sings about where queerness and spirituality meet, move, and dance. You’ll hear about: music as a spiritual practice, breaking labels, reading the room like a liturgist/DJ, “oceanic” identity, and how God—and community—keep getting bigger. Chapters (00:00:00) 00:00:00 — Welcome & why Illuminate exists 00:00:54 — Meet Wesley King & Nashville in Harmony 00:03:06 — The invitation: Big Freedia’s gospel project 00:05:35 — Listening with an open mind: bounce + gospel 00:08:58 — Pride stage & a secular choir meets sacred songs 00:10:24 — Rehearsal revelations: embodied spiritual responses 00:18:37 — “Let It Rain” & “Lift Every Voice”: grief, lineage, call-and-response 00:21:14 — Nightlife as liturgy: reading the room, mind-body-action 00:32:08 — Stretching theology without new fundamentalism 00:36:21 — Recs, dream church tour, and closing invite to dance This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit illuminatepodcast.substack.com [https://illuminatepodcast.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]