Gardening

Gardening

Hey there. If you like the show I would love to get your feedback and give you a shoutout. Bye for now. Dr Rocco [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/fan_mail/new] Life and How to Live It Podcast with Dr. Rocco Season 2, Episode 1: Gardening with Kathy Smith Host: Dr. Rocco | Guest: Kathy Smith Episode Overview In this episode of Life and How to Live It, I begin Season 2 with a conversation about something that seems simple on the surface, but is actually full of wisdom, patience, beauty, humility, and life lessons: gardening. My guest for this episode is Kathy Smith, and together we explore not just how to garden, but why gardening matters. This conversation is about soil, seeds, plants, flowers, vegetables, planning, patience, and trial and error. But more than that, it is about what the garden can teach us about how to live. Gardening invites us to slow down. It teaches us that growth takes time. It reminds us that we are not fully in control, even when we plan carefully. We can prepare the soil, choose the seeds, water the plants, protect them as best we can, and still have to accept that weather, timing, insects, disease, and nature itself all play a role. That, to me, is one of the great lessons of gardening. It is an act of hope, but also an act of surrender. Why Gardening Is More Than a Hobby One of the things I appreciate about Kathy is the way she understands gardening as more than simply planting things in the ground. Gardening is physical, mental, emotional, and even spiritual. When we garden, we use our bodies. We bend, dig, lift, carry, weed, water, prune, and harvest. It gets us outside and connects us with fresh air, sunlight, movement, and the changing seasons. But gardening also does something for the mind. It gives us something to focus on that is real and alive. In a world where so much of life happens through screens, schedules, notifications, and noise, gardening brings us back to something basic and grounding. There is a kind of peace that comes from putting your hands in the soil. There is satisfaction in seeing something grow because you cared for it. There is also humility in realizing that even with all your effort, nature has the final say. Getting Started Without Being Overwhelmed A major theme in this conversation is that gardening does not have to be intimidating. You do not need acres of land, expensive tools, or years of experience to begin. Kathy helps remind us that a person can start small. A few herbs in pots, a small raised bed, a container garden, or one corner of a yard can be enough. Sometimes people avoid gardening because they think they have to do everything at once. But like many things in life, it is better to begin with what is manageable. Start with a few plants. Learn what grows well where you live. Pay attention to how much sun the area receives. Learn how water moves through the soil. Notice what thrives and what struggles. Gardening is not something you master in one season. It is something you learn by doing. The Importance of Soil One of the practical lessons that comes through in this episode is the importance of soil. Beginners often think gardening is mainly about the plant, but Kathy points us back to the foundation. Healthy soil makes a tremendous difference. If the soil is poor, compacted, lacking nutrients, or not draining well, the plant will struggle no matter how much effort you put into it. That is such a good life lesson. What is happening beneath the surface matters. In life, we often focus on visible results: success, achievement, productivity, appearance, performance. But underneath all of that is the “soil” of our lives — our habits, relationships, health, values, rest, and spiritual grounding. If those things are neglected, growth becomes harder. In the garden, we may need compost, organic matter, mulch, and time to build healthier soil. In life, we also need to tend to the conditions that allow us to grow. Patience and Timing Gardening is a wonderful teacher of patience. You cannot rush a seed. You cannot force a tomato to ripen before its time. You cannot demand that a flower bloom because you are ready to see it. Growth has its own rhythm. That is difficult for many of us because we live in a world of speed. We want quick answers, fast results, instant delivery, and immediate change. Gardening gently pushes back against that. It says: wait, watch, tend, and trust. This is one of the reasons I think gardening fits so beautifully with the theme of this podcast. Life also has seasons. There are times of planting, times of waiting, times of pruning, times of harvest, and times when things appear dormant but something is still happening beneath the surface. Kathy’s experience reminds us that timing matters. Planting too early, too late, too much, or in the wrong place can affect the outcome. But even when things do not go as planned, we learn. Learning From Mistakes Another important part of gardening is accepting mistakes. Every gardener has had plants fail. Every gardener has planted something in the wrong place, watered too much or too little, underestimated pests, misread the season, or expected more than the garden could give. But that is not failure in the deepest sense. That is education. Kathy’s approach encourages us to see gardening as a learning process. Each season gives feedback. The garden tells you what worked and what did not. You adjust, try again, and grow along with it. That is a lesson for life as well. We do not get everything right the first time. We make decisions, we see the results, and then we learn. The mistake itself is not the end of the story. What matters is whether we are paying attention. The Joy of Growing Food We also talk about the special joy that comes from growing food. There is something deeply satisfying about harvesting something from your own garden. It may be a tomato, a pepper, lettuce, herbs, beans, or a handful of something small, but when you grow it yourself, it feels different. You understand the work behind it. You appreciate the taste more. You become more aware of where food comes from and how much effort goes into producing it. Growing food can also reconnect us with family traditions. Many of us have memories of parents, grandparents, neighbors, or relatives who grew things, cooked from the garden, shared produce, or had a deep respect for the land. Gardening can become a way to remember, preserve, and pass on those traditions. For children especially, gardening can be a wonderful teacher. It helps them see where food comes from. It gives them responsibility. It lets them experience wonder. A child who watches a seed become a plant may begin to see the natural world differently. Beauty, Flowers, and the Soul Gardening is not only practical. It is also beautiful. Flowers, trees, shrubs, and ornamental plants add something to our lives that is hard to measure. Beauty matters. A garden can lift the spirit. It can create a place of peace. It can become a space for reflection, conversation, prayer, or simply quiet enjoyment. Kathy and I reflect on the fact that gardens do not have to be perfect to be meaningful. A garden does not need to look like a magazine photo. It does not need to impress anyone. It simply needs to be alive, cared for, and connected to the person tending it. That is another life lesson. We often chase perfection when what we really need is presence. Gardening and Community One of the beautiful things about gardening is that it naturally leads to sharing. Gardeners share seeds, cuttings, advice, tools, stories, vegetables, flowers, and lessons learned the hard way. Gardening creates conversation between neighbors. It brings generations together. It encourages people to ask questions and learn from one another. It is also a reminder that we are part of something larger. The garden is not only about us. It involves bees, butterflies, birds, worms, insects, microbes, rain, sun, and soil. When we garden, we participate in a living system. That awareness can make us more thoughtful and more grateful. What Gardening Teaches Us About Life For me, the heart of this episode is the connection between gardening and life. Gardening teaches us to prepare, but not control everything. It teaches us to be patient, but not passive. It teaches us to work hard, but also to wait. It teaches us that pruning can lead to growth. It teaches us that some things need to be removed so healthier things can flourish. It teaches us that beauty can come from dirt. It teaches us that small seeds can produce abundance. It teaches us that even after a difficult season, another season can come. These are not just gardening lessons. These are life lessons. My Takeaway My biggest takeaway from this conversation with Kathy is that gardening is one of those ordinary activities that can become extraordinary when we pay attention. It can feed us, calm us, humble us, strengthen us, and remind us of truths we easily forget. We are living beings in a living world. We need light, nourishment, patience, care, and room to grow. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/support] Feel free to visit my website https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast [https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast]

Baseball with Pete

Hey there. If you like the show I would love to get your feedback and give you a shoutout. Bye for now. Dr Rocco [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/fan_mail/new] Life and How to Live It Podcast with Dr. Rocco Episode: Baseball with Pete — What the Game Teaches Us About Life Host: Dr. Rocco | Guest: Pete Episode Overview In this episode, I am joined by my friend and co-host Pete for a conversation about one of the subjects closest to both of our hearts: baseball. We recorded this episode in early March, just as spring training and the World Baseball Classic were underway, and we knew the episode would be released around Opening Day. So it felt like the perfect time to talk about the game we love. But this conversation is not only for baseball fans. My hope is that even if you do not follow the sport, you will still hear something meaningful in the way baseball connects to family, memory, patience, resilience, community, and the way we live our lives. Why Baseball Matters to Pete Pete shares how baseball has been part of his life from his earliest memories. For him, the game is deeply connected to his father, to playing catch, collecting baseball cards, watching games, and learning to love the rhythm of the season. One of the most moving parts of the conversation is when Pete talks about his last interaction with his father before he passed away. It was a text about baseball. That small moment says so much about how the game became part of their relationship. Pete also reflects on passing that same love of baseball down to his own sons. His boys played the game through high school, and one even played into college. Pete did not try to overstep as a coach, but he was present as a father, supporter, and fan. What he shared with his dad, he was able to continue with his children. My Own Baseball Story I also share my own story of how baseball helped me feel more American. My parents came to the United States from Italy in the early 1960s. I was born here, just outside the Bronx, but I grew up in a very Italian world. I did not really speak English until I was about seven years old, and I remember feeling like an outsider when I first went to school. Baseball became one of the ways I began to feel connected. I learned the rules, the teams, the players, the history, and even the geography of the United States through baseball. Places like Milwaukee became real to me because of the teams and the games. I also remember being taken to Opening Day at the newly renovated Yankee Stadium in 1976. I was around ten years old, and even though I was a Mets fan at the time, walking through the tunnel and seeing that enormous green field was unforgettable. For me, baseball became part of the journey of becoming Italian American — still connected to my family’s roots, but also connected to this country. The Life Lessons Baseball Teaches Us One of the main reasons I wanted to have this conversation is because baseball teaches so many lessons about life. The first is patience. Baseball is a slow game. A season has 162 games. One pitch does not decide everything. One loss does not end the season. Baseball reminds us that today is one day, and tomorrow is another day. The second is perspective. In baseball, you learn not to overreact to one moment. You wait for the next pitch, the next inning, the next game. That is something we all need in life. Baseball also teaches us to pay attention. When you really watch the game, you notice small things: where the fielders are standing, what the pitcher is doing, how the catcher reacts, and how the situation changes from pitch to pitch. That habit of paying attention matters in life too — in our work, our families, and our relationships. Another lesson is the power of small improvements over time. A player does not become better all at once. He works on one detail, then another. The same is true for health, relationships, work, and personal growth. Small changes, repeated consistently, can become habits — and habits can change a life. Baseball also teaches resilience. Even great hitters fail most of the time. If you succeed three times out of ten, you can be considered excellent. That is a powerful reminder that failure is not the end. We learn, adjust, and come back again. I also love how baseball gives people a way to unplug. For Pete, and for me too, a ballpark can feel restorative. It gives us a break from the stress of daily life. Everyone needs something like that, whether it is baseball, walking, reading, painting, woodworking, or anything else that helps us breathe again. Community, Role Players, and Tradition Baseball also reminds us of the importance of community. From Little League fields to minor league parks to major league stadiums, people gather together around something shared. Pete and I talked about the special feeling of being at a ballpark, surrounded by people who are all there for the same reason. Another beautiful lesson is that everyone has a part to play. Baseball has stars, but teams do not win with stars alone. They need the player who moves the runner over, makes the routine catch, gets the timely hit, or simply does his job every day. That is true in life as well. Families, organizations, and communities work best when everyone understands that their contribution matters. We also talk about history, ritual, and tradition. Opening Day, the first pitch, the seventh-inning stretch, singing Take Me Out to the Ball Game — these rituals connect us to something bigger than ourselves. In our families, traditions do the same thing. As life changes, those little repeated moments often become the memories we treasure most. Do Not Take Yourself Too Seriously One of my favorite lessons from baseball is that we should not take ourselves too seriously. Baseball has mascots, funny races between innings, walk-up songs, practical jokes, and all kinds of goofy traditions. It is a serious game, but it also knows how to have fun. That is a good reminder for life. We should care about what matters, but we should also leave room to laugh. Baseball Movie Recommendations Before we close, Pete and I talk about baseball movies. Pete’s favorite is Field of Dreams, especially because of the father-son relationship and the unforgettable final scene of playing catch. My pick is Bull Durham. I love how it captures the world of minor league baseball. It is funny, thoughtful, romantic, and filled with memorable lines. It also does not take itself too seriously, which fits perfectly with the spirit of this episode. Closing Thought Whether you love baseball or not, I hope this episode helps you think about life a little differently. Baseball reminds me to be patient, pay attention, keep improving, stay resilient, value community, honor tradition, and remember to laugh. And as always, remember: life is not a dress rehearsal. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/support] Feel free to visit my website https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast [https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast]

Meditation

Hey there. If you like the show I would love to get your feedback and give you a shoutout. Bye for now. Dr Rocco [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/fan_mail/new] Life and How to Live It Podcast Show Notes Episode: Meditation with Mark Power - Learning to Be Present Host: Dr. Rocco | Guest: Mark Power Episode Overview In this episode, I sit down with Mark Power for a thoughtful and practical conversation about meditation. Like many people, I know meditation sounds helpful - more calm, more presence, a better sense of well-being - but I also know the questions that come with it: What kind should I try? What if my mind will not quiet down? How do I even begin? Mark makes meditation feel much less mysterious. He reminds us that it is not about forcing the mind to be still. It is about learning to relate to our thoughts, emotions, and the present moment with more patience, awareness, and kindness. About My Guest: Mark Power Mark has practiced meditation since the late 1970s. He began as a young man looking for meaning and eventually learned meditation through Buddhist training. In 2005, he was appointed a Mitra, or teacher, in the Nalanda Bodhi Buddhist organization, where his focus has been the intersection of contemplative practice and daily life. Mark also worked as a chaplain in palliative care, served as adjunct faculty at the Indiana University Kelley School of Business guiding MBA students in mindful presence, and now works as a life coach. He also carves wooden spoons and lives with his wife in Red Hook, New York. Mark's Meditation Journey Mark started meditating during a tumultuous emotional season in his late teens. He found books on Buddhist meditation, followed that curiosity, and began experimenting with the practice. Meditation did not instantly solve everything, but even in the early days it gave him a way to get a handle on emotions that felt unruly. That stood out to me. Meditation is not a magic switch. It is a practice. The calm may come slowly, but the practice can begin to change how we relate to what is happening inside us. Meditation Is Not About Forcing Stillness One of Mark's most helpful points was that meditation is not about trying to force your mind into silence. In fact, the harder we try to get rid of bothersome thoughts, the stronger they often seem to become. ·         You are not fighting your thoughts. You are learning to shift your attention away from being caught up in them. ·         The breath becomes an anchor. Not by thinking about the breath, but by noticing the sensation of breathing in and out. ·         Calm is allowed, not forced. Mark said he could not make calm happen, but he could allow it to emerge by bringing a soft focus to the breath. Returning to the Breath Without Judgment This is where many of us struggle. We sit down, try to meditate, and suddenly the mind is filled with work, errands, worries, and memories. Mark's advice was simple: notice what is happening without judging it. ·         Do not call yourself a bad meditator. A wandering mind does not mean you are failing. Coming back is the practice. ·         Return gently. Each time you return to the breath, you are practicing presence. ·         Thoughts are often not about now. They replay the past, worry about the future, or imagine something else. Meditation brings us back to what is actually present. I loved this because it connects meditation to everyday life. When we are more present, we listen better, respond more thoughtfully, and make better choices instead of being carried away by every thought or emotion. Different Ways to Meditate I asked Mark about the different kinds of meditation because that can be confusing. His answer helped simplify it: the forms he is familiar with all have something in common - they are ways of managing attention. ·         Mantra meditation: placing attention on a repeated phrase or mantra. ·         Mindfulness meditation: using the breath, physical sensation, or another simple object of attention. ·         Visual or sound-based meditation: placing attention on a still object, a sound, chanting, prayers, or sacred songs. The common thread is this: place attention, notice when the mind wanders, and return gently without judgment. Mark described it as learning to be observers, not judges. Ordinary Breathing, Not Controlled Breathing Because breath came up so often, I asked if Mark was talking about a special breathing pattern. His answer was clear: no. In this context, meditation is not about managing the breath. It is about managing attention. You allow your body to breathe as it needs to breathe, and you place attention on the sensations of that ordinary breath. Walking Meditation and Movement We also talked about walking meditation, which Mark described as meditation in action. Instead of sitting still and focusing on the breath, walking meditation uses the movement of the legs and feet, and the feeling of the feet touching the ground. ·         Let attention move out of your head. Many of us live mostly in our thoughts. Walking meditation brings attention back into the body. ·         Notice the rhythm. The foot lifts, the leg swings, the foot meets the ground, and the next step follows. ·         Presence can happen in motion. Meditation does not only happen while seated. It can happen while walking, moving, and noticing the world around us. The Benefits of Meditation Mark spoke about meditation's benefits from emotional, spiritual, and relational angles. ·         Less stress and anxiety. In his work as a chaplain, Mark used meditation to help people lessen stress and face difficult medical situations. ·         Guided imagery. This can support confidence, grief work, and a healthier view of ourselves. ·         A deeper experience of faith. Meditation can move faith from something we only think about into something more embodied and experienced. ·         More kindness toward ourselves. Mark said one of the most important benefits of consistent meditation is that we become kinder to ourselves. That last point really hit me. A lot of us live with negative self-talk and constant self-criticism. Meditation may be one way we learn to give ourselves a little more grace. Prayer, Spirituality, and Meditation Because Mark mentioned prayer, I asked how prayer and meditation are similar and different. He explained that both involve focus and attention. In prayer, there is often a specific intention - we pray to or pray for. In meditation, we practice letting go and returning to the present moment. Mark also described how the two can come together. Meditation can bring a more embodied feeling to prayer - not only thinking the prayer, but bringing the heart, body, and present-moment awareness into it. How to Get Started For anyone who likes the idea of meditation but does not know where to begin, Mark suggested starting simply. ·         Try a well-produced app like Headspace or Calm, especially if there are free introductory options. ·         Research local meditation groups and notice how they describe their approach. ·         Know what you are walking into. A silent meditation group and a devotional chanting environment can feel very different. ·         Follow your curiosity. Many people begin simply because they get curious and take one small step. Simple Meditation Experiments to Try I asked Mark for something listeners could try even before downloading an app or joining a group. He offered a few small experiments that cost nothing and take very little time. ·         Sit still for 10 seconds and notice what it feels like to be still. ·         Notice three full breaths in and out, then let it go. ·         While walking, notice the sensation of your foot touching the ground. ·         Look up into the sky, take a breath, breathe out, and let everything go for a moment. Mark's Closing Thought: Meditation as Kindness As we wrapped up, Mark emphasised that meditation is a form of kindness. It is not a sport, and we do not need to approach it competitively. Trying to sit too long, forcing a difficult posture, or treating meditation like an athletic performance can work against us. Quote of the Episode "Kindness is the Cure." - Mark Power This was Mark's answer to my billboard question, and I think it says a lot in just a few words. Closing Thoughts This conversation reminded me that meditation does not have to be intimidating. We do not have to empty our minds, force calm, or become experts before we begin. We can start by noticing one breath, one step, one moment of stillness. And maybe that is enough for today. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/support] Feel free to visit my website https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast [https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast]

The Mediterranean Diet

Hey there. If you like the show I would love to get your feedback and give you a shoutout. Bye for now. Dr Rocco [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/fan_mail/new] Episode: Understanding the Mediterranean Diet Host: Dr. Rocco | Guest: Susan Chiappini, PhD Episode Overview In this episode, I'm joined again by my wonderful wife, Susan, who you'll remember from episode three. Susan has a PhD in physiology, real-world experience in nutritional science, and co-directs the farm kitchen at a local farm where she teaches cooking classes. Today we're talking about something close to both of our hearts — the Mediterranean diet. I come from a Southern Italian background, and Susan grew up in a Syrian American household, learning to cook in her grandmother's kitchen. Between the two of us, we've got a couple of corners of the Mediterranean covered, and I think that made for a great conversation. The Mediterranean diet has been recommended by the World Health Organization, the American Heart Association, the American Diabetes Association, and the UK's National Health Service. UNESCO even named it a Cultural Heritage of Humanity back in 2010. So we dug into what it actually is, why it works, and how to bring more of it into your own kitchen — wherever you happen to live.   Olive Oil: Where It All Starts Almost every dish in a Mediterranean kitchen starts with olive oil in the pan. Susan explained that olive oil replaces much of the animal fat found in a more modern diet, which means less saturated fat and fewer fats damaged by processing — and it's been shown to help lower LDL cholesterol. We also got into how olive oil is actually made. Olives are pressed in a mill, and the liquid that separates out is the oil. The first pressing, done without heating the olive pulp, gives you extra virgin olive oil — the good stuff. Later pressings involve heat to extract more oil from the leftover pulp, but heat damages the fats, which is why extra virgin is the gold standard (and the priciest). Susan's tips for buying good olive oil: •        Price matters — pricier oils tend to be better oils •        Look for dark glass bottles or tins, since light degrades the oil •        Check the label for “first cold pressing” and “extra virgin” •        A pressed-on date is a great sign (not to be confused with an expiration date) •        A peppery bite in the back of your throat means good quality •        Store it somewhere cool and dark once you're home   Fresh, Seasonal, Local Produce The traditional Mediterranean diet leans heavily on fruits and vegetables that are in season and grown locally — picked for flavor, not for shipping. Cooking those vegetables in olive oil actually helps pull out fat-soluble nutrients like vitamin A, making them more digestible. People eating this way naturally end up with about twice the fiber of the average American diet, which feeds a diverse, healthy gut microbiome.   Whole Grains, Beans, and the Truth About Pasta Beans are a fantastic source of protein and fiber, and Susan recommends buying dried beans rather than canned, soaking them overnight to neutralize the natural enzyme inhibitors, and cooking them slowly with broth and herbs. And yes, we talked about pasta. Italians eat it, sometimes daily, but in modest portions, cooked al dente (which lowers its glycemic index), and always alongside vegetables, olive oil, and other foods that slow the release of sugar into the bloodstream. It's one course in a larger meal — not the whole meal.   Meat as a Supporting Player In the Mediterranean, meat tends to flavor a dish rather than dominate it — think lamb mixed into cracked wheat, or a little beef stuffed into eggplant alongside rice and tomato sauce. Coastal regions eat more seafood, including canned tuna and anchovies. Cured meats like prosciutto and salami have their place too, but in small quantities, used as flavoring rather than the main event — not the gigantic Italian sub you'll find in the US.   Dessert, Dairy, and Wine Dessert is usually just fruit, maybe with a few nuts, rather than cake or cookies. Dairy tends to be cultured — yogurt and aged cheeses — which preserves the nutrition in milk while adding beneficial bacteria. Wine is consumed with meals, in moderation, as part of the overall ritual of sitting down together, eating slowly, and enjoying the company.   How to Eat More Like This Yourself Susan's advice: start at the grocery store. Shop the produce section for what's in season, hit a farmer's market if you can, and don't skip the aisle with dried beans and grains. From there, build meals that lead with vegetables, legumes, and whole grains, and use meat as a flavoring rather than the centerpiece. Leftovers make great lunches, and a roasted Sunday chicken can stretch into tacos, salads, or soup later in the week.   Dr. Rocco's Recs 📚 Susan recommends The New Book of Middle Eastern Food by Claudia Roden. My pick is The Essentials of Classic Italian Cooking by Marcella Hazan — the bible of Italian cooking, with step-by-step instructions clear enough for even a beginner to follow.   One More Thing Did you know garlic is a 9,000-year-old plant? Garlic cloves were even found in King Tut's tomb. If you're worried about garlic breath, try sprinkling some parsley on your dish — it's the traditional remedy.   Until next time — life is not a dress rehearsal. Subscribe to the Life and How to Live It Podcast and leave us a review. See the show notes for more information. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/support] Feel free to visit my website https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast [https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast]

End of Life Planning

Hey there. If you like the show I would love to get your feedback and give you a shoutout. Bye for now. Dr Rocco [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/fan_mail/new] LIFE AND HOW TO LIVE IT PODCAST WITH DR. ROCCO Episode: End-of-Life Planning with Marion Power, RN In this episode, I’m joined by a very dear friend and someone I’ve learned an enormous amount from — Marion Power. Marion is a longtime registered nurse who has worked in the operating room, emergency department, and hospice. Her experiences in those settings led her to her current speciality as a geriatric care manager, helping seniors and their families navigate the challenges of ageing. Her focus is on helping people make positive, informed decisions about their care — with the goal of remaining at home for as long as possible. Marian also loves long-distance walking in France, teaches yoga, and is an avid quilter. I think you’re going to get a lot out of this conversation. What Is a Geriatric Care Manager? Many people haven’t heard this term before, and I think that’s worth changing. A geriatric care manager assesses, coordinates, and oversees the care of older adults who can no longer live fully independently — or whose family members are struggling to support them. They come in, evaluate the whole picture — medical, cognitive, legal, financial, and home safety — and help you understand what your options are and what resources are available in your community. Marion shared the story of one of her very first clients, John, who had suffered two debilitating strokes, lived alone, and had no children or spouse. With Marian’s help, John assembled a care team — a live-in caregiver, a grocery shopper, someone to take him out — and he stayed in his own home for seven more years. By all accounts, he was a cheerful guy who had a pretty good life despite his disabilities. That story stuck with me. It’s a powerful reminder that end-of-life planning isn’t just about the final weeks — it can shape years of meaningful living. How to Find a Geriatric Care Manager Geriatric care managers are not typically assigned through hospitals, so you have to seek them out. The best resource is the Ageing Life Care Association, a national organisation that vets its members and maintains a searchable directory. You can find it at aginglifecare.org. In the upper right-hand corner, click “Find an Expert,” enter your ZIP code, and you’ll find care managers in your area. The calibre of professionals on that site is high — there are real requirements to be listed there. What the Process Looks Like Marion typically starts with a home visit — and she tries to get as many family members there as possible so everyone is on the same page. She does a thorough assessment covering medical needs, cognitive status, legal documents, home safety, medications, finances, and what the client and family each want — which, she notes, are often two very different things. From there, she generates a prioritised plan of care across all of those categories. She also accompanies clients to doctor’s appointments as a patient advocate — asking the questions family members don’t know to ask — and checks in regularly to help move through the list. One thing she said that really hit home: it’s like coaching. “Have we accomplished this? What do you need my help with?” She’s not there to take over — she’s there to support. The Essential Legal Documents — Start Here If you’re over 60 and you don’t have these in place, this is where to begin. I’ll admit, I was in that boat myself before this conversation. •      Will — directs where your assets go. Needs to be done with an elder law attorney. •      Power of Attorney — designates someone to manage your financial and legal affairs. Elder law attorney required. •      Healthcare Proxy — names someone to make medical decisions on your behalf if you can’t. This one you can do yourself using downloadable forms. •      Living Will — states your wishes for end-of-life medical care: CPR, intubation, and so on. Also can be completed independently. •      Trust — worth exploring with an elder law attorney if you have significant assets.   Once those documents exist, tell your family. Show them. Let them know where the paperwork is kept. Marion made the point that if a parent has a stroke and ends up in the ER unconscious, and two children disagree about what he would have wanted — because no one ever wrote it down — you have difficulty on top of difficulty. Clear documents prevent that. On the question of insurance: geriatric care management is not covered by most insurance and is billed privately. That said, Marion offers sliding scale fees, and even a single consultation — roughly six hours of her time including the home visit, the report, and the review — can be worth its weight in gold just to know what your options are and get the ball rolling. On Being Present When Someone Is Dying Marion closed with something I didn’t want to rush past. She said that being present with a loved one as they die is valuable — and while it can be frightening, it’s an experience worth taking the time to have. It’s the culmination of a relationship. It can be a chance to heal. It moves beyond our rational thinking into something spiritual. And it is a gift: for the person dying, and for you. Between a good care manager and hospice, she said, you can make that experience happen at home, in familiar surroundings, surrounded by the people and things that person loves. That stayed with me.  Dr. Rocco’s Rex Make your next vacation a walking or cycling trip. You slow down to about two miles an hour instead of 70, and everything changes — you actually see the countryside, you meet local people, you stop and smell the roses. It’s great exercise, which works up a great appetite, so you can enjoy the food without guilt. And you don’t have to do it as a hardcore backpacker — there are companies all over the world that will plan your itinerary, arrange lodging, and even shuttle your luggage between stops so all you have to do is walk. Give it some thought. One More Thing Did you know that Alaska is 429 times larger than Rhode Island — and yet Rhode Island has a bigger population? Rhode Island comes in at 1.1 million people versus Alaska’s 750,000. So if you’re really looking to get away from it all, you know where to go.  Guest Billboard Message “Stay engaged... It’s worth it.” — Marion Power Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2595932/support] Feel free to visit my website https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast [https://www.neaccoaching.com/podcast]