Ep 34: Is the "High Value Woman" Trend Actually Keeping You Single?

Ep 34: Is the "High Value Woman" Trend Actually Keeping You Single?

Are you dating like a high-value woman when you should be dating like a woman of value? The distinction sounds small. It isn't. In this episode, Laurie Gerber sits down with Sandy Weiner, founder of Last First Date and author of 3 books, including her newest, Love at Last, to unpack why the "high value woman" framework so many women over 50 have adopted may actually be working against them.  Sandy's concept of the "woman of value" flips the script: she's not the prize waiting to be won. She knows her worth, she shows up authentically, and she doesn't abandon herself to be chosen. Laurie and Sandy dig into what a real man of value looks like (growth mindset tops the list, not therapy hours logged), the difference between a standard and a demand, and how dating from scarcity leads women straight past the good ones.  Sandy shares her "show up, stand up, speak up" framework, her post-date debrief method, and the single thing every love story in her book has in common. For women over 50 who keep wondering why love hasn't landed yet, this episode will help you see exactly what you might be missing. ⏱ TIMESTAMPS 00:00–01:26 — Why "Know Your Worth" Alone Won't Change Your Dating Results  01:27–07:36 — Woman of Value vs. High Value Woman: A Critical Distinction  07:37–09:32 — Meet Sandy Weiner: Chief Love Officer at Last First Date  09:33–16:00 — Why the High Value Woman Pendulum Swings Too Far  16:01–19:03 — Standards vs. Demands: Where Confidence Becomes High Maintenance 19:04–25:30 — What a Man of Value Actually Looks Like (Growth Mindset First)  25:31–38:00 — Show Up, Stand Up, Speak Up: Sandy's Framework for Early Dating 38:01–53:51 — Self-Sabotage, Scarcity Dating, and the Surprising Truth About Love  🔗 LINKS & RESOURCES 📚 Sandy's Books:  🔮 Drawing from over eighteen years of experience as a certified life, dating, and relationship coach, Sandy Weiner will disclose the hidden reasons why we make poor choices in love and the behaviors and skills that lead to our best choices and ultimately – our last first date. Get the book here: Choice Points in Dating by Sandy Weiner  https://amzn.to/3jTFQe9  🔮 Becoming a Woman of Value by Sandy Weiner https://bit.ly/womanofvaluebook 🔮 Love at Last by Sandy Weiner (true stories of people who found lasting love) https://amzn.to/4erpj7C 🌐 Sandy's website: https://lastfirstdate.com 🎙 Sandy's podcasts: Last First Date Radio Podcast on Apple Podcasts http://bit.ly/lastfirstdateradio or Spotify https://tinyurl.com/lfdradio  🎙 The Woman of Value Podcast https://bit.ly/4nSC699 👯 Facebook group for women: https://www.facebook.com/groups/yourlastfirstdate/  📱  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@lastfirstdate1  📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lastfirstdate1/  ▶️ YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Lastfirstdate   More from Laurie: If you want clarity on what a healthy partnership looks like for you, Laurie walks you through the 3H method step by step in her free 75-minute training: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com/webinar?utm_source=love_at_any_age&utm_medium=youtube&utm_campaign=guest_appearance&utm_content=sandy_weiner&utm_term=ep34  🌐 Laurie's website: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com?utm_source=love_at_any_age&utm_medium=youtube&utm_campaign=guest_appearance&utm_content=sandy_weiner&utm_term=ep34  Stay connected with Laurie: ▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lauriegerbercoach 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauriegerber_coach/  👍 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lauriegerberdatingcoach  💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauriegerber  🎙 Podbean: https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/

Ep 33: Why He Pulls Away: The Ex-Wife Trigger You Don't Know About

What does a divorced man over 50 really need in dating, and why do so many smart, capable women keep accidentally driving him away?  In this episode, Laurie Gerber and returning guest Lisa Copeland decode the 5 things divorced men wish women over 50 knew before dating them. Using real comments from divorced men who responded to Episode 18, they cover what men over 50 really want, why women unknowingly trigger ex-wife fears, what intimacy actually means to a man who has been touch-deprived, and the communication gap that makes normal female conversation feel like an attack. This is dating after divorce advice grounded in what men actually say, not what we assume they mean. Laurie Gerber has been helping women over 50 date effectively for 20 years, and Lisa Copeland is one of the first coaches to focus exclusively on dating in midlife. Together, they bring decades of expertise to a format that sets this episode apart: the insights don't come filtered through a coaching lens alone. They come directly from divorced men who had something to say about what women keep getting wrong. If you want to attract a divorced man and stop repeating the patterns that go sideways, this conversation is worth your full attention. ⏱ TIMESTAMPS 00:00–03:33 — Intro: 5 things divorced men wish women knew.  03:33–08:41 — Accepted as is: the one thing divorced men want most.  08:41–12:01 — Trust: how women unknowingly push men away.  12:01–21:59 — The ex-wife trigger: what criticism signals to divorced men.  21:59–25:07 — What divorced men actually mean by intimacy.  25:07–30:06 — Flirting after 50: how to show real interest.  30:06–37:13 — Why divorced men need women to get to the point.  37:13–42:03 — Homework: the 3 pairs of dating glasses. 🔗 LINKS & RESOURCES Episodes mentioned in this conversation: Episode 18: 8 Things Men Really Want in a Woman Over 50 (with Lisa Copeland) https://youtu.be/XLXCOjYu36w Lisa Copeland's free resource (mentioned in this episode): The Art of Flirting After 50: How to Let a Man Know You're Interested Without Feeling Awkward, Fake, or Like You're Chasing Him 👉 https://find-a-quality-man.aweb.page/Laurie-flirting-after-50 Lisa Copeland: 🔗 https://findaqualityman.com/ More from Laurie: If you want clarity on what a healthy partnership looks like for you, I walk you through the 3H method step by step in my free 1-hour training: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com/webinar?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=podcast&utm_content=ep_033&utm_term=lisa_copeland Take Laurie's quiz (Are You Ready to Date Like You Mean It?) and explore all her coaching resources: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=podcast&utm_content=ep_033&utm_term=lisa_copeland   Stay connected with Laurie: ▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lauriegerbercoach 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauriegerber_coach/ 💙 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lauriegerberdatingcoach 💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauriegerber 🎧 Podbean: https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/ [https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/]   More About Laurie: Menopause Love Lounge: ⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj⁠ [https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj]

Ep 32: The 3 Signs He's Healed Enough to Date (And When to Walk Away)

Are you dating a divorced man over 50 and wondering if he's actually healed, or just using you as his rebound therapist? Dating a divorced man isn't just dating him. You're dating his wounds, his trust issues, his ex-wife dynamic, and sometimes his complicated relationship with his kids. It can feel like a lot,  because it is. And if you don't know what you're looking for, it's easy to end up in a relationship that drains you instead of fills you up. In this episode of Love at Any Age, Laurie Gerber sits down with Rachael Sloan, founder of Better Beyond Divorce, a coaching program that helps men heal emotionally after separation. Rachael has worked with over 600 divorced men and she knows what a healed man actually looks like before he starts dating again.  This is a rare peek behind the curtain at what men are really going through, and what women over 50 need to know to stop missing the signs. Laurie and Rachael cover the 3 green flags that tell you a divorced man is genuinely ready, the rebound relationship signs that women consistently overlook, and how to handle ex-wife drama and his kids without losing yourself in the process. If you're dating after divorce over 50, this episode will save you months of confusion. ⏱ TIMESTAMPS 00:01–01:28 — Why Dating a Divorced Man Is Different 01:28–03:08 — Meet Rachael Sloan: Inside the Divorced Men's World 03:08–06:30 — Red Flag: When He Uses Dating as Therapy 06:30–09:03 — What Divorced Men Are Really Struggling With 09:03–14:00 — Trust, Emotional Availability & What Women Miss 14:00–19:07 — Nervous System Regulation & Old Biases About Men 19:07–22:46 — The 3 Signs He's Actually Ready to Date 22:46–35:03 — Good Men, Healing Stages & Bringing Out His Best 35:03–38:44 — When His Ex Comes Back on the Scene 38:44–50:21 — His Kids, the Final Red Flag & Rachael's Free Guide 🔗 LINKS & RESOURCES Rachael Sloan's Free Download:  Emotional Stages of Divorce — A Survival Guide for Men 9 stages of the divorce grieving process, with signs for each stage and exercises to help men move through them instead of getting stuck.  https://resources.rachaelsloancoaching.com/stages 👉 Find Rachael and Better Beyond Divorce at: https://www.rachaelsloancoaching.com/ Rachael's YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@RachaelSloanRelationshipCoach Episode mentioned: Ep. 24 with Alison Armstrong on men, agency, and what they really need in relationships https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mflu8wn4e64   More from Laurie: If you are a man looking for help with dating, please fill out Laurie’s survey to get in touch https://lauriegerber.com/maol-men-survey If you want clarity on what a healthy partnership looks like for you, Laurie walks you through how to define what you’re looking for,  step by step in her free 75-minute training: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com/webinar?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=podcast&utm_content=ep_032&utm_term=rachael_sloan 🌐 Website: https://www.lauriegerber.com/?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=podcast&utm_content=ep_032&utm_term=rachael_sloan   Stay connected with Laurie: ▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lauriegerbercoach  📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauriegerber_coach/  👍 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lauriegerberdatingcoach  💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauriegerber  🎙 Podbean: https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/   More About Laurie: Menopause Love Lounge: ⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj⁠ [https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj]

Ep 31: Monogamy Before Sex: 6 Hurdles You Need to Clear First

Are you assuming you're exclusive when you've never actually had the conversation? Most women over 50 who are dating again make this exact mistake, and the fallout is real. She stops checking other profiles. She tells her friends. She starts planning a future. And he has no idea any of that is happening. In this episode of Love at Any Age, Laurie Gerber breaks down why assuming monogamy is one of the most common and costly mistakes in dating over 50. She hands you a complete framework for handling it: assessing your own 3H readiness, clearing the 6 hurdles before sex belongs in the relationship, and following a precise 4-step checklist for actually establishing exclusivity. This episode gives you the words, the order, and the confidence to stop guessing and start choosing. Laurie helps women over 50 stop operating on assumptions and start building real, lasting love. If you're dating right now and the exclusivity conversation hasn't happened yet, this episode is not optional. ⏱ TIMESTAMPS 00:01–00:27 — Why assuming monogamy in dating is costing you.  00:28–01:32 — What today's episode covers: the full roadmap.  01:33–03:18 — Who this episode is for; Laurie's dating coaching philosophy.  03:19–05:10 — The monogamy mismatch: men assume vs. women assume.  05:11–08:10 — How to assess your 3H readiness before raising monogamy.  08:11–11:11 — Why waiting for monogamy before sex protects your heart.  11:12–20:30 — The 6 hurdles to clear before having sex with someone.  20:31–29:11 — The 4-step checklist to establish monogamy (exact words to use).  29:12–35:59 — Homework, crazy comments, and closing thoughts. 🔗 LINKS & RESOURCES Episodes mentioned in this episode: Episode 5 (how to talk about the difficult things and liabilities): https://youtu.be/qN-d5vMFdwE Episode 12 (dating profiles and what you have to offer): https://youtu.be/sawFhaAk5NQ Episode 13 (referenced in Crazy Comments): https://youtu.be/UTqyOl7K0Wc Episode 30 with Donna Barnes (attachment, chemistry, and the 6 hurdles):  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLvnDQgyH5k&t=174s More from Laurie: If you want clarity on what a healthy partnership looks like for you, Laurie walks you through the 3H method step by step in her free 75-minute training: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com/webinar?utm_source=youtube&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=podcast&utm_content=ep_031 Stay connected with Laurie: 📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lauriegerbercoach 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauriegerber_coach/ 💙 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lauriegerberdatingcoach 💼 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauriegerber 🎧 Podbean: https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/ [https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/]   More About Laurie: Menopause Love Lounge: ⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj⁠ [https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj]

Ep 30: When Is It Actually Time to Have Sex?

Are you still following the third date rule when it comes to sex, and wondering why it keeps backfiring? Most dating advice about when to have sex is either vague, outdated, or designed with someone else's agenda in mind. For women over 50, the stakes are higher. You know what heartbreak costs. You know what it feels like to override your own gut and regret it. And you deserve a clear, practical roadmap instead of a guessing game. In this episode, dating coach Laurie Gerber sits down with relationship expert and podcast host Donna Barnes to walk through the 6 questions every woman over 50 must be able to answer before sex belongs in a new relationship.  From "do I know him well enough?" to the monogamy conversation most couples skip entirely, this episode covers the real meaning of readiness and gives you a checklist you can actually use. If you've ever wondered how long to wait before sex, what healthy relationship sex actually looks like, or how to have the STI conversation without dying of awkwardness, this one is for you. ⏱ TIMESTAMPS 00:00–02:05 — The Third Date Rule: Myth vs. Reality 02:06–07:28 — Donna's 10-Date Rule and Why It Works 07:29–09:47 — Introducing Donna Barnes 09:48–18:42 — Question 1: Do I Know Him Well Enough? 18:43–20:53 — Question 2: Are We a Real Match? 20:54–26:48 — Question 3: Are My Eyes Wide Open? 26:49–31:15 — Question 4: Has Monogamy Been Defined? 31:16–35:37 — Question 5: Are We Responsible About STIs? 35:38–43:18 — Question 6: Are We Prepared for It to Go Well? 43:19–45:30 — Homework + Where to Find Donna 🔗 LINKS & RESOURCES 📖 Previously mentioned episode: Episode 6: Questions to Ask on the First Few Dates: https://youtu.be/rNcaQKJxBqA 📚 Guest Resources:  🎙 Broken to Brave Podcast (Donna Barnes)  https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOy5sro7RED31krPpnsgsUx-KjcTbTHkd 🌐 https://donnabarnes.com  📺 Donna Barnes on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@DonnaBarnes/  More from Laurie: If you want clarity on what a healthy partnership looks like for you, Laurie walks you through the 3H method step by step in her free 75-minute training: 👉 https://www.lauriegerber.com/webinar?utm_source=love_at_any_age&utm_medium=youtube&utm_campaign=guest_appearance&utm_content=donna_barnes&utm_term=ep30  🌐 https://lauriegerber.com https://www.lauriegerber.com?utm_source=love_at_any_age&utm_medium=youtube&utm_campaign=guest_appearance&utm_content=donna_barnes&utm_term=ep30  Stay connected with Laurie: YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lauriegerbercoach  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauriegerber_coach/  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lauriegerberdatingcoach  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauriegerber  Podbean: https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/ [https://lauriegerbercoach.podbean.com/]   More About Laurie: Menopause Love Lounge: ⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj⁠ [https://open.spotify.com/show/60kJBvN1p4ZBsmEJL5rEdj]