Resiliently Rising Podcast

Ep 39. Fight Right: What the Gottmans Want You to Know About Conflict

30 min · 5. maj 2026
episode Ep 39. Fight Right: What the Gottmans Want You to Know About Conflict cover

Description

In this episode, Carrie and David break down why so many relationship conflicts—especially after betrayal—feel like they go nowhere and leave both partners more hurt. Drawing from the Gottmans’ Fight Right, they explain how conflict itself isn’t the problem… it’s how we handle it that determines whether it builds connection or creates more damage. They unpack what happens in the body during an argument, including “flooding”… when the nervous system goes into survival mode and real communication becomes impossible. They also explore the difference between solvable and perpetual problems, why most relationship conflicts never fully “go away,” and how trying to win those arguments often keeps couples stuck. This episode offers practical, compassionate guidance on recognizing your own triggers, taking effective pauses, and learning to approach conflict with more awareness and intention… so you can stop fighting against each other and start understanding what’s really underneath.   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean [https://www.instagram.com/healwithcarriejean/] 🌿Resiliently Rising Circle: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle] ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching] 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus] 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety] 🙋‍♀️ ‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8 [https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8] 🔅 I was just betrayed... what now? Webinar: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar]   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!    🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

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episode Ep 47. Separation After Betrayal: Creating Space That Supports Safety and Clarity artwork

Ep 47. Separation After Betrayal: Creating Space That Supports Safety and Clarity

Separation after betrayal can feel terrifying, confusing, and loaded with meaning. For many couples, the word “separation” feels like the beginning of the end. But separation is not automatically a step toward divorce, and it is not automatically a step toward reconciliation.  In this episode, Carrie and David talk about what separation after betrayal trauma can look like, including in-home separation, separate living arrangements, communication boundaries, check-ins, timelines, and how to decide when or if it feels safe enough to come back together.  This conversation is for anyone navigating betrayal trauma, relationship repair, boundaries, nervous system safety, or the painful uncertainty of what happens next.   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/healwithcarriejean/] 🌿Resiliently Rising Circle [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle] ✨Coaching [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching] 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus]  🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety] 💊 PalmVitaResearch Supplements [https://glnk.io/3xkq1/carrie] 🙋‍♀️ ‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions [https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8] 🔅 I was just betrayed... what now? Webinar [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar]   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

Yesterday33 min
episode BONUS: Healing After Betrayal: A Conversation on the Body, Safety, and Trust with Jan Winhall artwork

BONUS: Healing After Betrayal: A Conversation on the Body, Safety, and Trust with Jan Winhall

This bonus episode is a powerful conversation between Jan Winhall and Carrie Holladay on the Embodied Dialogues Podcast. Together they explore betrayal trauma through a Felt Sense Polyvagal lens. Together, they discuss how betrayal impacts the nervous system, disrupts a person's sense of safety, and often leads to protective responses like hypervigilance, shutdown, and disconnection. Rather than focusing solely on understanding the story of what happened, they explain why healing requires restoring a felt sense of safety in the body. The conversation offers a compassionate, non-pathologizing approach to rebuilding trust, highlighting the roles of neuroception, co-regulation, embodied awareness, and ventral vagal connection in creating lasting healing after betrayal. Connect with Jan: https://www.fspminstitute.com/ [https://www.fspminstitute.com/] Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean [https://www.instagram.com/healwithcarriejean/] 🌿Resiliently Rising Circle: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle] ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching] 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus] 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety] 🙋‍♀️ ‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8 [https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8] 🔅 I was just betrayed... what now? Webinar: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar]   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

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episode Ep 46. Somatic Safety Session: Soothing the Spike After a Trigger artwork

Ep 46. Somatic Safety Session: Soothing the Spike After a Trigger

Ever felt a sudden rush of panic that takes over your body? You're not alone. Let's talk about what to do next. Triggers can hit us out of nowhere, sending our bodies into a frenzy. Your heart races, muscles tense, and suddenly, you’re not in the present anymore. But it's important to remember: this reaction doesn't mean you're broken. It’s just your body trying to protect you from past trauma. Today, we’ll explore gentle practices to help your nervous system find calm again. It’s all about allowing yourself to feel and respond with compassion   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean [https://www.instagram.com/healwithcarriejean/] 🌿Resiliently Rising Circle: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle] ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching] 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus] 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety] 🙋‍♀️ ‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8 [https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8] 🔅 I was just betrayed... what now? Webinar: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar] 👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

23. juni 202617 min
episode Ep 45. WYW: How Do I Make the Anxiety Stop? artwork

Ep 45. WYW: How Do I Make the Anxiety Stop?

Betrayal trauma reshapes your nervous system — and anxiety is often the loudest signal of that change. In this What You're Wondering episode, Carrie and David respond to a listener struggling with constant anxiety after discovering her husband's porn addiction. Carrie explains why anxiety after betrayal isn't a flaw but a survival response, and introduces a powerful reframe: instead of asking how do I make it stop, ask what is my anxiety trying to protect? David speaks honestly about how he mishandled Carrie's anxiety early on — and what actually helped. Practical somatic tools, a section for betrayers on what their partner's anxiety actually needs, and a candid look at what non-linear healing really looks like. Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean [https://www.instagram.com/healwithcarriejean/] 🌿Resiliently Rising Circle: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle] ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching] 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus] 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety] 🙋‍♀️ ‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8 [https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8] 🔅 I was just betrayed... what now? Webinar: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar]   👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!  🎧 Music Credits: “Piano Soft Music” - Surpringing_SnapShots, Music by Mircea lancu from Pixabay

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episode Ep 44. The Secret Sexual Basement: Understanding Betrayal, Lies & Integrity Abuse with Janae Lindsey artwork

Ep 44. The Secret Sexual Basement: Understanding Betrayal, Lies & Integrity Abuse with Janae Lindsey

This week on the Resiliently Rising Podcast, Carrie sits down with therapist and betrayal trauma specialist Jenae Lindsey for a powerful conversation about the hidden damage of deception, secrecy, and integrity abuse in relationships after betrayal. Together, they unpack the concept of the “secret sexual basement,” why the lies and manipulation often hurt more than the behavior itself, and how betrayal impacts the nervous system, self-trust, and reality itself. This episode offers validation, education, and hope for anyone navigating betrayal trauma... whether you’re struggling with hypervigilance, questioning your intuition, trying to rebuild trust, or simply wondering if healing is even possible. Carrie and Jenae explore topics like compartmentalization, betrayal blindness, attachment, self-trust, emotional safety, and why healing requires addressing both the compulsive behaviors and the integrity wounds underneath them. Connect with Janae: 📲 Instagram: @couchtalkers [https://www.instagram.com/couchtalkers/] https://www.desertbloomrecovery.org/ [https://www.desertbloomrecovery.org/]   Connect with Carrie: 📲 Instagram: @healwithcarriejean [https://www.instagram.com/healwithcarriejean/] 🌿Resiliently Rising Circle: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/circle] ✨ Coaching: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/1-1-coaching] 💛 Rebuilding Us: Nervous System Based Path to Healing Together After Betrayal - https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/rebuildingus] 🌀 Reclaiming Safety: Healing Nervous System After Betrayal Course – https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/reclaimingsafety] 🙋‍♀️ ‘What You’re Wondering’ Q&A Submissions: https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8 [https://forms.gle/MmwTxso6rJH4uuPN8] 🔅 I was just betrayed... what now? Webinar: https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar [https://www.resilientlyrising.com/what-next-webinar] 👉 Stay Connected & Keep Rising!

9. juni 202653 min