The Kindness Extremist with Shola Richards

You Are Enough: The Self-Worth That Makes Every Act of Courageous Kindness Possible

23 min · 1. juni 2026
episode You Are Enough: The Self-Worth That Makes Every Act of Courageous Kindness Possible cover

Description

Most people spend years chasing a feeling of being enough, tying their worth to promotions, praise, productivity, and the approval of people around them. But what if that entire approach is backwards?  In this episode, Shola Richards makes the case that genuine self-esteem is not something you find, it is something you deliberately construct, and the building process is simpler and more accessible than most people think. If you have ever felt like your confidence depends on everything going right, this episode will change how you think about your own worth and your capacity to show up for the people who need you most.  Mentioned in This Episode The Kindness Extremist Podcast Ep 48: The Necessity of Doing Hard Things: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-necessity-of-doing-hard-things-3-strategies-to/id1808367842?i=1000750997021 Dr. Kristin Neff, researcher and author on self-compassion: https://self-compassion.org/ 🔗 Connect with Shola: Instagram – @sholarichards [https://www.instagram.com/sholarichards] Website – sholarichards.com [https://www.sholarichards.com/] Read more on Substack [https://substack.com/@sholarichards ]. This podcast is produced by https://www.micmoguls.com

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67 episodes

episode Intuition or Anxiety? How to Tell Which Signal is Trying to Save You or Ruin You artwork

Intuition or Anxiety? How to Tell Which Signal is Trying to Save You or Ruin You

Can you actually tell the difference between anxiety and intuition? For many people, distinguishing between these two sensations can feel impossible. In this episode, Shola Richards breaks down three practical strategies that can help you recognize which inner voice you're actually hearing before making your next big decision. Through the episode, Shola shares the personal story of how anxiety nearly convinced him to walk away from the work he was called to do, plus examples of what happens when you learn to listen to your intuition. You'll discover why anxiety creates urgency, why intuition rarely does, and how slowing down may be the most powerful decision-making skill you can develop.   The Kindness Strategies: ✔ The Body Signal Check  ✔ The Pattern Test  ✔ The Slow Knowing Practice   Stop getting caught up in the stories that anxiety is feeding you, and start listening to your inner wisdom instead. Whether you're facing a career decision, relationship challenge, or simply relearning to trust yourself, these strategies can help you move forward with greater clarity and confidence.   Resources mentioned in this episode: * Dr. Antonio Damasio, Author of Descartes' Error: https://dornsife.usc.edu/profile/antonio-damasio/ [https://dornsife.usc.edu/profile/antonio-damasio/]   For speaking requests or collaborations: https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep66 [https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep66]   🔗 Connect with Shola: Instagram – @sholarichards [https://www.instagram.com/sholarichards] Website – sholarichards.com [https://www.sholarichards.com/] Read more on Substack [https://substack.com/@sholarichards ]. This podcast is produced by https://www.micmoguls.com

29. juni 202621 min
episode The Kindness of Asking for Help: 3 Ways to Stop Carrying It All Alone artwork

The Kindness of Asking for Help: 3 Ways to Stop Carrying It All Alone

Most people assume that asking for help makes them a burden. But the truth may be the exact opposite. In this episode, Shola Richards explores a powerful truth that many high-achievers, caregivers, and chronic over-functioners need to hear: asking for help is not a weakness. On the contrary, it's actually one of the most profound acts of kindness you can offer yourself and the people who care about you.   Through the episode, Shola reveals why so many of us struggle to ask for support, how we dramatically underestimate people's willingness to help, and what it looks like to build healthier, more connected relationships by allowing others to show up for us. You'll learn a simple framework for identifying where you're carrying too much alone, how to make effective requests without guilt or awkwardness, and why learning to receive help may be the growth edge you've been avoiding.   The Kindness Strategies: * The Self-Reliance Inventory  * The Specific Ask Protocol * The Receiving Practice   Allowing people to help you may be one of the greatest gifts you can give them, and this episode will help you do so without shame.   Resources mentioned in this episode: * Dr. Vanessa Bohns: https://www.vanessabohns.com/ [https://www.vanessabohns.com/] * Dr. Heidi Grant Halvorson: https://www.heidigrantphd.com/ [https://www.heidigrantphd.com/] For speaking requests or collaborations: https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep64 [https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep64] 🔗 Connect with Shola: Instagram – @sholarichards [https://www.instagram.com/sholarichards] Website – sholarichards.com [https://www.sholarichards.com/] Read more on Substack [https://substack.com/@sholarichards ]. This podcast is produced by https://www.micmoguls.com

22. juni 202623 min
episode Jealousy is a Kindness Killer: How to Defeat Envy Before it Defeats You artwork

Jealousy is a Kindness Killer: How to Defeat Envy Before it Defeats You

Someone in your life is winning right now. Maybe they landed the promotion you wanted, or their business is growing faster than yours. Maybe they're receiving recognition, opportunities, or attention you've been working toward for years. And if you're honest, part of you isn't celebrating. Instead, you're grappling with a difficult question: Why them and not me?   In this episode of the Kindness Extremist Podcast, Shola Richards tackles envy, one of the most universal and least discussed emotions we experience. Rather than treating envy as a character flaw, Shola explores how it can become valuable information about what you truly want, where you're feeling stuck, and how comparison may be quietly stealing your joy. He discusses the difference between destructive envy and productive envy and explores how to break free from the comparison loop and transform resentment into growth.   The Kindness Strategies: * The Envy Admission * The Comparison Fast * The Celebration Practice   Envy doesn't make you a bad person. And if you've ever felt behind, overlooked, or triggered by someone else's success, this episode offers a practical roadmap for turning those emotions into personal growth and deeper kindness.   Resources mentioned in this episode: * Episode 23: Why Appreciation Could Be the Key to Happier Work & Life [https://youtu.be/SBGSDitTLRI] * Episode 42: Social Media Is Rewiring Your Brain for Anger [Here’s How to Stop It] [https://youtu.be/HG1rZLbz9R4] For speaking requests or collaborations: https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep63 [https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep63] 🔗 Connect with Shola: Instagram – @sholarichards [https://www.instagram.com/sholarichards] Website – sholarichards.com [https://www.sholarichards.com/] Read more on Substack [https://substack.com/@sholarichards ]. This podcast is produced by https://www.micmoguls.com

15. juni 202623 min
episode Your Sensitivity is Not a Weakness: Why Feeling Things Deeply is Exactly What Our World Needs artwork

Your Sensitivity is Not a Weakness: Why Feeling Things Deeply is Exactly What Our World Needs

Have you ever been told you're "too sensitive?" Maybe it came from a parent, teacher, boss, friend, or simply from a culture that celebrates toughness while treating emotional depth as a liability. Over time, many deeply caring people learn to hide parts of themselves just to fit in.   In this episode, Shola Richards challenges one of society's most damaging myths: that sensitivity is weakness. Drawing on research from Dr. Elaine Aron and his own experience as a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), Shola explores why sensitivity is actually one of the greatest sources of empathy, connection, leadership, and kindness. He also shares practical strategies for protecting your emotional well-being without suppressing the very qualities that make you uniquely powerful.   The Kindness Strategies: * The Sensitivity Reframe * Your Protection Protocol * The Sensitivity Declaration   If you've spent years trying to develop "thicker skin," this conversation offers a different path forward.   Resources mentioned in this episode: * Episode 57: Hustle Culture Is Killing Your Kindness (Here's Why)  [https://youtu.be/urt0QsrLbwQ] * Dr. Elaine Aron: https://hsperson.com/ [https://hsperson.com/] For speaking requests or collaborations: https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep63 [https://sholarichards.com/speaking/?utm_source=kindness_extremist&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=ep63]     🔗 Connect with Shola: Instagram – @sholarichards [https://www.instagram.com/sholarichards] Website – sholarichards.com [https://www.sholarichards.com/] Read more on Substack [https://substack.com/@sholarichards ]. This podcast is produced by https://www.micmoguls.com

8. juni 202621 min
episode You Are Enough: The Self-Worth That Makes Every Act of Courageous Kindness Possible artwork

You Are Enough: The Self-Worth That Makes Every Act of Courageous Kindness Possible

Most people spend years chasing a feeling of being enough, tying their worth to promotions, praise, productivity, and the approval of people around them. But what if that entire approach is backwards?  In this episode, Shola Richards makes the case that genuine self-esteem is not something you find, it is something you deliberately construct, and the building process is simpler and more accessible than most people think. If you have ever felt like your confidence depends on everything going right, this episode will change how you think about your own worth and your capacity to show up for the people who need you most.  Mentioned in This Episode The Kindness Extremist Podcast Ep 48: The Necessity of Doing Hard Things: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-necessity-of-doing-hard-things-3-strategies-to/id1808367842?i=1000750997021 Dr. Kristin Neff, researcher and author on self-compassion: https://self-compassion.org/ 🔗 Connect with Shola: Instagram – @sholarichards [https://www.instagram.com/sholarichards] Website – sholarichards.com [https://www.sholarichards.com/] Read more on Substack [https://substack.com/@sholarichards ]. This podcast is produced by https://www.micmoguls.com

1. juni 202623 min